Tangled Web
by m7707
Summary: Edward, Jacob, Demetri, and Felix are members of the Volturi Elite Guard. Their team tracks beings that have violated the Volturi Code of Silence. When they are assigned to investigate the human Isabella Swan, Edward's unalterable world is altered. AU
1. Prologue: The Spider Before The Fly

**Disclaimer: S. Meyer owns all things Twilight. Me, not so much.**

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**PROLOGUE: The Spider Before The Fly**

This is my tale, the telling of events that fundamentally altered the unalterable existence of Edward Anthony Masen Cullen.

I am a vampire. Throw out your fictional Hollywood notions, if you please. I do not turn into a bat or other creature. I am the creature. Sunlight makes me glow – a subtle, mesmerizing sheen of inexplicable beauty, not burn and blacken and turn into a pile of dust. Garlic and holy water? Not a problem, other than the fact that I cannot digest them or any other human food. Requiring an invitation to enter a dwelling is another ridiculous concept. That is just a myth to give humans a false sense of security in a dangerous world. There is not a lock or a barrier on this earth that could keep me out – or in – if I so determined. I possess strength and speed beyond the comprehension of human understanding. My mental abilities far e exceed anything in human existence in capacity and calculation. I am immortal, like all my kind, and I can also read minds. That is a fascinating and infuriating ability that is particular to me and me alone. My physical attributes are also amazingly superior – my voice, my face, my body, even my smell – all the better to attract my prey. I drink blood, of course. Vampires suck the life force out of insignificant, inferior beings.

I did not always drink the blood of humans, however. For a period of time after I was changed, well over 100 years ago, I lived with my creator and mentor, Dr. Carlisle Cullen. Carlisle found me in his hospital dying of Spanish Influenza. The disease had taken the lives of both of my parents, as well as most of the city of Chicago. He is an amazing creature with strength of purpose and morality such as I have never seen before or since. Carlisle's inherent character had obliged him to discover a way to survive not on the blood of humans, but on the blood of even lesser creatures – animals – and thrive. He refused to let what he was change who he was, the most compassionate and caring individual I have ever come across. He guided me through my first decades in the vampire world in his ever patient, generous manner.

I was the first vampire he had created in the over 300 years of his existence. He did it out of loneliness, attachment, and love. I understood this completely, and it was something for which I was very thankful. It was also something that I could not forgive. That dichotomy was what had driven me from our home and the life he had chosen and into the circumstances in which I found myself now.

It was not the only reason I had left my home and those I loved. In the intervening years, Carlisle had occasion to change his wife and mate, Esme, who became my mother for all intents and purposes. As a human she had thrown herself from a cliff, distraught over the death of her infant child. Carlisle found her as she lay dying from her injuries and changed her. She is a gentle, loving being, and a more fitting partner for him I couldn't imagine. The fair Rosalie came next, a victim of a particularly gruesome violence. A few years later Rosalie was hunting in the wilderness and discovered Emmett bleeding to death from a bear attack. She convinced Carlisle to save him with eternal damnation. It was a few years after that Alice and Jasper found us, Alice having seen our vegetarian lifestyle in one of her visions and knowing they were meant to be a part of our family.

It was living with three very happily mated couples that was the final blow to my mental and emotional stability, although it was something I would never admit to them. They tried so hard to block their thoughts, to keep private those things that should be private. It wasn't their fault. It was mine, the freak among freaks. I couldn't even afford my family, those that I loved above all else, the privacy and intimacy that was their right. So I left.

I found my way to Volterra, a small, ancient town in Italy. It was home to the Volturi, a primeval, royal vampire court that ruled over the world of all legendary beings. Aro, Caius, a, and Marcus were a trio of vampires who acted as sovereigns of the Volturi, maintaining the secrets of mythical creatures and their societies. They governed the one Rule held by all – keeping the existence of such magical races a secret from humans. Their Guard and coven of followers consisted of legendary creatures of every kind, and all possessed special abilities of one type or another, much like my mind reading capabilities. I knew Aro would welcome my talent and intellect, as he had indicated such in the past on numerous occasions. So I donned the dark grey cloak of the Volturi's Elite Guard and tried to find satisfaction in the blur of days, months, a, a nd years that rolled by, ever the same.

Enough of Carlisle's principles had ingrained themselves in my habits that I refused to partake of the particular "meals" brought in for the blood-drinking members of the Volturi and their Guard, innocents rounded up like cattle to the slaughter and brought to the Volturi stronghold for just such a purpose. I consoled my wayward conscience by hunting those humans who were less human than even I – those who raped, killed, robbed, and destroyed others of their kind. It was one use of my ability I found satisfactory. I could listen to the minds of those who planned to do harm, protect the innocent, and slake my thirst all at the same time. I often worked with the Volturi hunter and meal collector, Heidi, to minimize the assault on innocent humans. It helped relieve the ennui.

Aro had decided that my talents and abilities would best be put to use with a small specialized group used to track, evaluate, and if necessary, eliminate threats to our fabled world and continued survival. Demetri was a vampire, the tracker of our group; his ability was to lock on the mental signature of an individual and follow them anywhere in the world. I was the evaluator. Once our prey was found, I used my ability to listen to their mind and determine the truth of their thoughts and actions. If they were, in fact, a threat to our way of existence, Felix, another vampire, was called. He was the eliminator. The three pronged approach of our group was an ingenious balance of talent, personality, a,nd focus. It was simple, and precluded a mistake being made by separating our functions.

The last member of our group was not a vampire but a shapeshifter named Jacob. Jacob was a Quileute warrior and essentially human, but shapeshifted into the form of a giant red wolf. Jacob's duties were twofold: as a human, he had abilities and access we as vampires did not, and as a wolf he was an outstanding bodyguard and protector. The only thing that could harm or destroy a vampire was another vampire – or a werewolf. The shapeshifting warriors, whose transformation took the form of a wolf, assisted the Volturi in removing rogue monsters from existence and keeping our code of silence.

It was my job, a purpose amid purposeless days and nights, end after end. It was something I was very good at and even, on rare and fleeting occasions, actually enjoyed. It provided a brief glimmer of interest in absolutely uninteresting eons of time. Until that one particular day and that one particular job.

Until that one particular girl. The girl. My girl.

Isabella.


	2. Chapter 1: Walk Into My Parlour

**And...here we go. Many, many thanks to Project Team Beta and the hard working ladies there who review and make this so much more readable!**

**Disclainer: Stephenie Meyers owns. Me, not so much**

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**CHAPTER ONE: Walk Into My Parlour**

I will never forget the day my life changed. Well, changed again.

It was fitting in so many ways. It was Paris, and somehow Paris is a place that should set the scene for life changing events. I was at a small sidewalk café, quaint and picturesque, just like in the movies. I sat in the shadows – always in the shadows – dim, ethereal, mysterious, and not quite real. She sat in the sun in a yellow sleeveless dress. She glowed with life, health, and vitality. I brooded, bored and apathetic in the dark.

It was a partly sunny day in mid-May. The Volturi, with their vast resources, had developed a special type of contact lens that the venom in my eyes did not dissolve as quickly as normal contacts. They had a blue tint to them that made my red vampiric eyes appear an odd violet hue. It was unusual, but better to be remembered for my eye color than the variety of my other, more alarming features. In the dim light of the overhang my skin would not attract too much attention due to its unusual beauty. Keeping it covered with concealing clothing was usually enough to escape the attention of all but the most observant of humans, and even then the awareness was more admiring than anything else.

My team of the Volturi Elite Guard was in Paris due to our current assignment. We were experiencing unusual difficulty tracking twenty-year-old Isabella Marie Swan from the United States across the Continent. This particular human girl was our present task, as Aro had informed us that she may have knowledge of our species' existence. A vampire named Philip had formed a relationship with her mother a number of years ago when Isabella was still living with her, and Aro had concerns that Philip had broken his vow of secrecy to the women. Her mother, Renee, had passed away 18 months ago, but it had to be determined if the knowledge of our secret lived on with her daughter.

Demetri's difficulty in locking on to her mental wavelength to track her, as was our usual practice, was of some concern. We had to find her the old fashioned way – leg and computer work. Demetri, Jacob, and I spent weeks following her trail across Europe. She had inherited a modest amount of money from her mother's life insurance and was using it to travel and go to school abroad. I had finally followed her credit card trail to Paris where it appeared she had enrolled for the semester at the University of Paris - Sorbonne.

We had located her flat downtown, and Jacob secured an acceptable space for our use in the vicinity. Demetri had followed her around the city, tracking her activities and determining her routine. Every afternoon after her morning classes she stopped at this café, ordered espresso and pastries, and read for an hour or so before going home. I was determined to make brief contact with her, scan her mind for what she knew of vampires and mythical societies, and leave. My part would be done. We had already spent more time on this job than any other I could remember in my long, illustrious history. I was ready to get back to the relative peace of the Volturi stronghold and stone walls of Volterra.

I had settled in behind the local newspaper at my corner table in the shadows a few minutes before Isabella Swan's estimated arrival. Demetri was sitting on a bench that lined the street. His back was to me, sunglasses covering his face, and the hood from his sweatshirt pulled over his head. His hands were in the pockets, and he looked thoroughly disreputable. Jacob was across the street where he would be able to monitor all three of us. I ordered an espresso and croissant which I picked apart, unobtrusively scattering crumbs to make it appear as if I was eating. Isabella was shown to her usual table right on schedule. I folded the paper, setting it neatly in front of me, and looked up.

I recognized her from the photos we had been given and the images I had pulled from Demetri's mind, but they really had not done her justice. She was lovely in her yellow dress; the sunlight reflected off of the fabric and her creamy flesh. Her long hair danced in mahogany waves over her white shoulders and down her back. Her face was porcelain and roses, the delicate pink flush deepened when the waiter approached her and she gave her order to him in passable French. I could not yet see the exact color of her eyes, but they were large and framed by winged brows and thick lashes. She pulled a book out of her leather satchel and settled back in her chair, tilting her face to the sun.

I let my gaze linger. Not only was she an intriguing-looking girl, but I required her to notice me so I could make contact. My eyes marked her slim form, starting at the top of that mass of hair, tracing across her face, continuing downward to appreciate the delicate line of her collarbone and the swell of breast barely outlined by the bodice of her dress. Her neat waist was emphasized by the wide belt she wore, but the rest of her was hidden by the table. When I brought my eyes back to hers, I saw that my staring had attracted her attention, just as I had intended. I smiled slowly, and she glanced quickly away with a deep crimson flush. I let the half smile linger on my lips as I felt the faint, familiar burn in my throat at the evidence of blood in her cheeks. I leaned back deliberately in my chair, slightly spreading my legs and clasping my hands together just above the juncture of my thighs. It was a blatantly sexual move, and had never failed to capture the attention of a female. It did not fail now.

She glanced up, catching my movement out of the corner of her eye, and took in my posture. Her gaze unconsciously dropped to my hands clasped just above my groin, and then shot back up to my face. The burn in my throat increased in direct relation to the blush in her cheeks. I began to tune out the surrounding mental buzz of voices to concentrate on hers. I needed to get an idea of her reaction and what she was thinking. Slowly, the chatter faded out around her, and…I could hear nothing from where she sat.

Nothing?

She looked hastily down at her book again, and then took another quick peek at me. I deliberately widened my closed-lipped smile, and she shifted forward slightly in her seat, her fingers coming up to press briefly against her full mouth. I felt a distant satisfaction at the tell-tale gestures; they indicated she was intrigued – just as I had planned. _Will you walk into my parlour? said the Spider to the Fly._

I focused my concentration. There was a silent, looming mental void where she was sitting.

Impossible…I could see her physically right there in front of me. In all the decades of my existence as a vampire I had never come across an instance where I could not hear another being's thoughts. With an effort, I kept the smile fixed on my face as she suddenly had my complete and total attention. I was debating whether I should go to her table or make her come to me when a light spring breeze swirled across the patio.

A scorching inferno assaulted my nose. I gasped involuntarily in horrified shock as a locomotive punched me in the chest. Her scent almost literally brought me to my knees right there in the busy street-side café. I gasped, lurching forward in reaction and gripping the iron table hard to stop the instinctive urge to attack and devour. I automatically stopped breathing as venom inundated my mouth and poured in excess down my throat. It did nothing to abate the intense blaze ripping through my body, or the compelling urge to fly to her and gorge on the decadence of her blood. My entire being convulsed with the effort to master myself. I could not, I would not, not here, in public, on a busy Parisian street...I dimly heard the ominous creak of the table between my seizing hands as I thrashed internally with my base instinct. Oh God, her scent…her blood…Ahhhh….

_Edward! Edward, what's happened? What's wrong?_

I could dimly make out Demetri's frantic voice in my head. I looked up in a haze to see Jacob throwing himself across the street towards us in front of cars, his entire body trembling as he tried to quell the instinctive urge to phase when faced with a threat. He searched frantically for the danger he thought he had overlooked as he sprinted to me. _You fool!_ I thought, and I was shocked that there was even one small compartment of my brain that was still capable of rational consideration_. Keep it together!_ As I shook and shuddered I realized the thoughts were not mine, but theirs. I felt Demetri's hands on me, and I clung to them with such force any other being would have been pulverized.

"Get me out of here," I growled in anguish, my vision going red and hazy as my entire body locked down in an effort not to launch myself at the beautiful girl in yellow. I could not stop the tortured snarl that escaped the depths of my chest as Demetri pulled me away from the entire focus of my existence.

He dragged me out, throwing some bills on the table, and I tried desperately not to fight him. Jacob had a cab waiting for us curbside and they both wrestled me into the back of the vehicle. Demetri threw himself on top of my twitching body to keep me from darting back out.

"Grab his other arm, goddammit!" he hissed at Jacob, and they got me situated between them, hanging on to my arms as I jerked and quivered, baring my teeth.

Demetri gave the wide-eyed driver the address of our flat. His wary eyes looked us over in the rearview mirror, assessing. "Go! Now! Our friend is ill," Demetri barked in French, using his most compelling tone, and the cab lurched away from the curb.

I finally took a deep, shuddering breath so I had air to talk. It was easier, her scent was gone, and the red fog slowly began to fade from my vision. "It's okay, it's…I'll be all right. I'll be all right." My voice was… frightening.

They gave each other a worried glance over my head and their hold on me did not lessen. I became aware of the driver's thoughts; he was concerned I was having seizures and hoped I didn't vomit or emit other bodily fluids in his vehicle. Demetri and Jacob were confused and anxious. They didn't understand what had happened and were not sure they could control me if whatever madness that had gripped me at the café returned. I was much quicker and had the advantage of knowing their thoughts at almost exactly the same time they did.

The streets flew by in an indistinct blur as I fought back, inch by meager inch, the mania that engulfed me. The driver came to a sudden and quick halt outside the wrought iron gates of the courtyard that made up the private entrance to our flat. Demetri gripped my upper arm, glaring anxiously into my face as Jacob paid the driver and then resumed his hold on my other elbow. They were on either side of me, marching me up the enclosed stairs of the old stone building and into the comfortable, private living space. Enough sense had returned to me that I was able to quell the instinctive urge to fight their restraining hold, and I willed myself not to lock down into utter stillness while my mind scrambled to right itself. Jacob let go of my left arm and bolted the door while Demetri spun me around to face him. I could read their apprehension and bafflement.

"What the fuck just happened back there, Edward?" Demetri demanded. Jacob was still vibrating.

I shrugged out of Demetri's hold and lowered myself into the nearest chair, running both hands through my hair. I buried my face in my hands, elbows on my knees. I sat like that for a couple of seconds, and they gave me the brief time to pull myself together. Eventually I scrubbed my hands over my face and looked at them wearily.

"_La mia cantante_," I said, and Demetri goggled at me in horror. "She's my singer."


	3. Chapter 2: Within My Pantry

**Again, thanks to the Project Team Beta for beta-ing. Link on my profile if you want more info.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight, I only own this little bitty thing of a plot.**

**Vampward alert!**

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**CHAPTER TWO: Within My Pantry**

Demetri groaned, long and low, as he walked over to the wall and started smacking his forehead against it. I was quite certain he wasn't aware of the dust and chips of stone that floated around his head at the action. I closed my eyes and leaned my head back against the back of the chair, slouching down. I didn't want to see, or listen, to his frustration.

"Will somebody please tell me what the hell a singer is?" Jacob demanded in aggravation.

I chuckled mirthlessly, not moving from my position on the chair. After a few moments, I heard Demetri stop banging his head and walk back over to us. I could hear him struggling to organize his thoughts, to figure out how to explain. Jacob was not a vampire, and would not have this knowledge.

"Well?" Jacob stood with his hands on his hips, his frustration mounting.

"A blood singer," Demetri began slowly, "is a human whose blood sings to a particular vampire."

"What do you mean, 'sings'?" Jacob asked.

"It calls to them. The scent is absolutely irresistible. It's an uncontrollable, overwhelming compulsion to drink, taste, to gorge," Demetri explained. I shuddered. "It's like a living, breathing orgasm, only thousands of times stronger. It's like nothing you can imagine."

"Huh." I could hear Jacob turning this over in his head. "Maybe I can. Kind of like how imprinting is for my kind…but only on food."

"Well…" Demetri considered this, and I heard the amusement in his thoughts. "Yeah."

"That's just – sick." Jacob wrinkled his nose. "But then, if it's so irresistible how did Edward, um, resist?"

"I have no idea." Demetri turned to me with a curious expression. I could see myself in his head. Did I really look that alarming? "How did you? It's inconceivable."

"I was working," I snapped testily - the first thing that sprang into my mind. There was a short silence before they both burst out laughing, releasing the tension in the room.

"What? You don't think you deserve a lunch break?" Jacob gasped. "'Working'," he quoted me, and they laughed harder. "Oh, sweet Jesus, that's funny, Edward."

"Only Edward," Demetri panted in mirth. "He's the only vampire I know who could have his singer sitting twenty feet from him and resist the urge to feed because he… was… at… _work_!"

"Employee of the month, for sure," Jacob added. They were laughing so hard they had to sit on the floor.

"I am glad you think my suffering is entertaining," I said, but I couldn't keep the grim smile from my face at their obvious amusement.

Their laughter was winding down to snorts and wheezes. "Ah, fuck me," Demteri said, and raised an eyebrow from his position on the stone floor. "Seriously though, Edward, how did you stop yourself?"

"I have no idea," I admitted. "I didn't want to kill her." I frowned at this admission. I wasn't sure where the thought had come from. They were now looking at me like I was insane. I felt insane. "I didn't want to ruin everything – slaughter an innocent girl in the middle of a bistro on a Paris street."

"Is she innocent?" Demetri asked. "Did you get a chance to read her?"

In all the excitement I had forgotten all about that one very important little glitch. I wasn't able to read her. I had gotten nothing from her at all, just vast silence. "No," I said slowly. "I couldn't."

"Well," Demetri said, hoisting himself up onto his feet. "I guess that's to be expected with everything that happened. We'll just have to try again."

Jacob was watching me closely. "What exactly do you mean you couldn't read her?"

I looked at him. "I meant exactly that. I could not read her mind."

"Are you…How is that possible?" Demetri was shocked. "Has that ever happened to you before?"

"No," I admitted. "Never."

"Do you think it was because of this singer stuff? Whatever it is that makes her sing to you, you can't read her mind? Can't use your ability on her?" Jacob asked.

"I have no idea." I hadn't thought of this. "I suppose it's possible." I turned to Demetri. "Have you ever come across your singer?"

"Yes," he grimaced. "But I didn't stop to see if my abilities had any effect on her, and there was no reason to track her after that. Not many of us have your control, Edward." I cringed at his memory, fighting back the appalling lust the intensity of the vision brought us both. He saw me flinch, and winced himself. "Sorry."

He was right. It was similar to the most intense sexual high taken to the utmost degree. We strained to keep our bodies under control as the memory of him drinking from his singer washed over us.

"What is the problem with you two?" Jacob demanded.

"Jacob, we're not human. We're not even like you," Demetri said between clenched teeth.

"Well, yeah," Jacob scoffed. "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"When vampires get a hard-on, we don't have a circulatory system to diminish the 'hard' part," he explained bluntly, and I clenched my jaw. "There's only one way to…release it, and only a couple ways to accomplish that."

"Oh." Jacob frowned, and then his brows shot up. "Oh! Oh, that's…way too much information." He squeezed his eyes shut and held up his hands in front of him like a stopping guard. "Ugh, mental images I never wanted to have."

"Me either," I growled, glaring at him. "Please!"

"Ugh!" Jacob spun to the door.

"Give us some credit, Jacob, we're not twelve. It's fine," Demetri called.

"Really, ugh." He paused, his back still to us. "I'm going to grab something to…some lunch. I'll be right back. I need the air."

"Jacob -" Demetri started to protest, but I stopped him.

"Let him go; he'll be back. We can talk about what to do then. I could use some fresh air myself."

"He's being an idiot, running out like that."

"You didn't see those mental images," I muttered, and Demetri was silent.

**X-X-X-X-X**

After Jacob collected himself and returned, we gathered in the main room of the flat to discuss how to approach Isabella Swan once more.

"We're obviously going to have to try again," Demetri was saying. "Unless you just go ahead and have her, Edward. I'm sure Aro would understand, and no one would think badly of you for it. Actually, no one will believe you didn't take her that instant."

"Not if she's innocent," Jacob and I said at the same time, and Demetri rolled his eyes.

"Think about it," he encouraged. "It would solve the problem. You wouldn't have to worry about not being able to read her, and resisting her blood – I mean, she's your _singer_ for Christ's sake, Edward."

"Demetri," I said warningly.

"Okay, okay." He shook his head and sat quietly contemplating for a few minutes. "We should try it from a distance first then, I think, to be safe. One of us will have to be with you just in case you…slip. Probably me. I don't think Jacob in his human form is strong enough to stop you if that happened, or clean up afterward."

Jacob grunted at that, but I agreed. The urge had been so…intense. I didn't know if even Felix could stop me if I lost control under that irresistible influence.

"I thought your ability worked better with proximity," Jacob said.

"It does," I told him. "But Demetri is right. We should start slow, from a distance. It's worth trying. It would be safer for her."

Demetri was watching me worriedly. "Are you sure you can do this, Edward?" I nodded, and he asked, "Okay, then, are you sure you _want_ to do this – to put yourself through it?"

I got up and paced to the window. "Yes, I can do this. I will only get as close to her as I have to, read her, and leave. We've never left an assignment unfinished before, and we won't start with this one because of me."

"Maybe you could sit in one of her auditorium classes," Jacob suggested. "There are a ton of students, and no one usually takes attendance in those."

I shook my head. "I would be too conspicuous." There was no way I could blend in without her noticing me in that kind of setting, no matter how many were in the hall. I ran my hand through my bronze hair as I saw Jacob eyeing it in agreement in his head. Plus, if something did happen…all those humans in an enclosed space…

"How about outside her apartment?" Demetri suggested. "We could start there, and if that doesn't work you could try following her to school, getting close to her in the crowds on the street and on campus."

"A good place to start," I agreed. "Tomorrow morning."

"Why not tonight?" Jacob questioned. "We can see if you can read her mind while she's sleeping. If you can, bingo! We're done; we can go."

I tensed as I thought of the fragrance that would emit from her warm, sleeping body. "No. Too close, too soon." _Too intimate._

Demetri was watching me again. "We should feed tonight, Edward. You need to drink as much as you can. I know, it won't help a great deal," he said as I shot him an incredulous look, "but it can't hurt. We need to be as prepared as possible. You need to be as strong as possible."

"Yeah, so he won't waste any time dismembering our bodies to get to the girl," Jacob muttered, and stood up. "I'm outta here. I've got a date tonight." He grinned at our glares. "Hey, you get your kicks tonight, I get mine. Don't wait up for me, Daddy-Os."

After Jacob left Demetri and I waited for darkness and prepared to go hunting. Sadly, there was plenty of available prey that would satisfy both our hunger and my perverted principles. We headed for the depths of the city, places where we were perfectly comfortable, places that monsters of the night frequented. We drifted from alleyway to alleyway, down streets that never saw light of any kind. These places were populated by creatures that could only be considered human in the biological sense of the word. They were the sick, the twisted, and the evil. They were everywhere. I had learned over the course of my long existence that evil was not exclusive to poor, run-down, or forgotten areas of human population; it was simply missed less when it disappeared.

We passed a number of potential targets, but I walked on, Demetri trailing after me. His frustration and hunger was growing stronger, but I required a particular flavor tonight. I needed something basic; to feed from something so vile and contemptible there would be no conflict with my divergent morality. I was compelled to indulge in the depraved glory of my lust for blood tonight, and I required something as malevolent as I to satisfy it. We gave our particular brand of mercy to the hopeless and the ill, walked on past the merely pitiful.

In a stinking, wet alley, ripe with the refuse of human existence, I found what I was looking for. A group of four males were gathered in the shadows. They split the meager spoils from the poor, unfortunate soul they had just mutilated and murdered while they planned their next foul deed. I held my hand up to Demetri and gestured to where they were huddled together.

We fell upon them with a speed that was undetectable to the human eye, but I paused an instant before sinking my razor sharp and venom coated teeth into the soft, vulnerable neck of my appetizer. I wanted him to see the horror that was about to take him, as his victims had seen him. I perceived my face in the reflection of his mind, inhumanly beautiful, bronze hair in a wild tangle, white teeth gleaming eerily, eyes blazing bright bloody red. It was a face beyond his worst nightmare, striking terror in the depths of his being just before his lifeblood flooded my mouth and flowed down my throat. In an instant I was on the second human, a guttural and feral snarl issuing from my chest. He did not even know he should scream before I was slicing into his jugular and assuaging my craving.

Only when the desperate, dragging pulls of my mouth on his throat yielded nothing more did I release my hold. The lifeless body slipped from my grasp to puddle at my feet. I looked up to see that Demetri had taken neat care of the other two in the unholy foursome. He met my wild eyes and raised a brow.

"More," I gasped, rubbing the back of my hand across my lips. I closed my eyes in ecstasy at the lingering flavor of rich, hot blood on my tongue. "I'm going to need more."


	4. Chapter 3: Call Another Day

**S. Meyer owns all of Twilight, I only own what's left over in this little bit of nonsense.**

**Thanks again to PTB for their beta skills! They were especially helpful with suggestions in this chapter, helped with a couple of awkward passages.**

**BTW - this is going to be all from EPOV. I hate switching POVs, if I feel the need to do that, I have to write in third person.**

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**CHAPTER THREE: Call Another Day**

Just before dawn, Demetri and I found ourselves outside Isabella Swan's apartment building, hovering on the quiet sidewalk below her fourth story balcony. I was so full from gorging through the night, so overloaded, that I knew if any fresh body other than hers was laid before me I would turn away in disgust. The occasional human that was out on the street this early paid us no attention, shying instinctively away and ignoring our presence.

I knew my irises were just as brilliantly crimson as Demetri's from our feeding this past night. I pulled the small box of contact lenses out of my jacket pocket and put the first pair of the day in my eyes, handing him a pair as well. I blinked rapidly, scowling. They were irritating and made my usually sharp vision just slightly fuzzy around the edges.

The sun was beginning its ascent behind the heavy cover of clouds over the tops of the city buildings. I was thankful that it would not be out in full force today. We were going to have to engage with humans, and the unnatural beauty of our skin in direct light would only attract unwanted attention. I heard the alarm clock chime in the girl's room above us and the sounds of her shifting about in her bed.

"Anything?" Demetri asked, breaking my concentration. I gave him an annoyed look and resumed my focus.

I clenched my hands at my sides. I could still hear nothing from Isabella Swan.

I shook my head. "I'm going up."

"Edward -" Demetri began in warning, but I cut him off.

"Just up to the balcony. Just a little closer."

He sighed, but nodded. Crouching down, I launched myself upward in a movement too fast for the human eye to follow, catching the railing of her balcony and using it to assist my soundless landing. I felt the movement of air as Demetri joined me. I glanced around at the comfortable looking chaise lounge covered in thick outdoor cushions. Potted herbs grew in profusion out of small planters hung on the rail. We moved to stand just outside the glass door, and I paused as I reached out with my mind. I could hear her rustling beneath her bed sheets as she stirred, but nothing at all from her mental voice. I realized I had been holding my breath since we had approached her building, and took a cautious, slow inhale through my nose.

This time it was merely an automobile slamming into my chest instead of a locomotive. Fire licked down my throat. It burned a trail to my chest and swirled searingly through my abdomen where it set up a horrible, steady ache. Her scent still lingered out in the open space. Even diluted, faint through the barrier of the building, I could smell her warm, sleepy aroma. It was as stunning as I had remembered and feared. Something touched me, and I spun, baring my teeth, only just preventing a deafening growl from escaping. It was Demetri gripping my shoulder. I ground my jaw instead.

"Edward, it's too much. We should go."

"No," I protested, and realized I was shaking. _Unacceptable_. I brought my hands to my hair and held on. "A moment, please."

"Edward, this is ridiculous. I know you love to wallow, to torture you artistic soul," he mocked, "but you can't do this. No one could."

"A moment, Demetri." Already I could feel my control return in slow degrees. The crushing impact and the scorching fire were still there, but they bent to my will. I took quick breaths through my mouth and then cautiously through my nose. I flinched with the shock of the aroma in my nostrils. It lessened somewhat as I concentrated wholly on conquering the overwhelming urge to follow my instinct and feed on the luscious treat only yards away. "Better," I said after a time, relieved. "I _can_ do this."

Amazement showed plainly on his face and in his thoughts. "How?" he whispered.

"Mind over matter," I replied, moving closer to the door. "I think desensitizing helps. I can get over the worst of it from a distance and slowly move closer. I can do this," I repeated, more to myself than him. I reached for the handle – it was unlocked. Silly, naïve little human. Fourth floor balconies did not prevent unwanted guests.

His hand gripped my wrist and I paused, raising a brow at him incredulously. He huffed out a breath and let me go. "Fine. But you're playing with fire, my friend."

"You have no idea," I murmured, and silently entered her flat.

The scent was much, much stronger inside, and I actually staggered slightly, my head whirling. I grunted quietly, waiting, allowing the pain and the urge to attack to coil through me until it settled. Demetri grasped my arm, and after a few seconds I nodded curtly at him. His hand fell reluctantly away as he glared at me. _Baby steps_, I thought, and smiled grimly to myself.

Fleetingly, I noticed it was a small but comfortably furnished space, only one main room with a basic kitchen area along one wall. There was a large, oversized sofa and chair; I supposed they were cozy to humans. A small antique table with four matching chairs took up space near the kitchen. The most prominent feature in the room was the large bookcase filled to overflowing, volumes stacked and spilling everywhere. I eyed a doorway across the room and knew it was where she slept. On noiseless feet, I ghosted across the space and stopped in the doorway. I was compelled to see her, to test myself.

I could not stay away.

She had fallen back into a restless doze, lying on her stomach with both bare arms thrown over her head. The thin straps of a soft pink camisole marred her white shoulders. I stiffened, holding my breath again, waiting until will conquered instinct. I took small, quick sips of air through my nose.

_Ahhhh_…

I tipped my head back, eyes shut, and let the torrent of venom slip down my throat. I wanted her so badly! I could clearly imagine her soft, silky flesh blissfully yielding to my lips and teeth…her blood bursting wet and hot into my mouth…the soaring rapture of her _taste_…I locked my body down into utter stillness until I was certain it would obey the dictates of my rational mind. The hunger was immense. The fire was unbearable, but bear it I did. Slowly, slowly, I opened my eyes and set them on the sleeping girl before me. Yes. I could do this.

I studied her sleeping face in curiosity. It was surprisingly innocent for one who caused such ungodly pain. Her features twitched into a frown, and she lowered her arms to draw the covers tighter to her in her sleep. I wondered if she could somehow sense my presence here in her room. Did her body unconsciously recognize a predator, the mortal danger she was in due to my close proximity? A slight shiver trembled down her frame, and I backed deliberately away.

I could hear nothing, absolutely nothing, from her mind.

Damn it.

I turned to see Demetri framed in the balcony door. I opened my mouth to speak…

"Don't…go." Her soft voice came from behind me.

I spun back in an instinctive crouch to stare at her in shock. Had she woken up? How could I not have sensed that response physically, even if I couldn't sense it mentally? Why would she want me to stay? Demetri flashed to my side and we both stared at the girl. I relaxed in relief as I realized she was still slumbering. She was talking in her sleep. Was this normal for a human? I couldn't remember. What in the world could she be dreaming about?

Demetri hesitantly murmured for my ears only, "Time to get out of here, Edward. She'll wake in a moment."

I nodded in agreement, standing straight, and we glided to the balcony. I secured the door behind us soundlessly. We jumped to the sidewalk below in a blur of movement, with no one the wiser.

We walked the streets around Isabella Swan's apartment building, waiting for her to leave for classes and make the walk to the nearby campus. I had never done this before with any assignment. In every other instance, Demetri tracked, I listened, and Felix was called in to finish, if necessary. Jacob monitored and assisted. We had clearly defined roles, and had never deviated from them. This was so much more personal. Demetri walked along with me, oblivious to my brooding, whistling merrily.

"Doesn't this feel weird?" I asked, irritated. "Kind of…stalkerish?"

"Welcome to my world," he replied cheerfully.

I grunted, shoving my hands in my pockets and scowling. _Stupid tracker_. The entire situation was beyond aggravating. He nudged me with his elbow, nodding toward a slight figure moving away from us. "There's our girl."

My scowl deepened. She had her leather satchel slung over one shoulder. A soft, oversized green sweater draped gently over her hips and tan slacks. She walked swiftly down the sidewalk, dodging the crowds of people with unconscious familiarity. I saw white ear buds trailing from the sides of her head down to a pocket at her waist and felt the irritation deepen. Did she not realize how unsafe it was to walk in the city with music blasting, unable to hear any danger or warnings? I snorted in amusement to myself. She would never get even a glimmer of warning from the biggest threat to her life.

We followed behind her as she moved briskly along the street. She paused curbside at a red light, waiting with the early morning crowd to cross the street. I took the opportunity to come up close behind her, inches away, bracing myself as I carefully inhaled. The impact of her scent was definitely getting more bearable, but I still could get nothing of her thoughts. We let her walk ahead.

"Let's meet her on her way to the café this afternoon. I'll make contact, perhaps sit and talk with her. If I still get nothing…I have no idea what to do next," I admitted to Demetri as he came up beside me. We watched Isabella head toward a campus building and disappear inside. I frowned, rubbing my forehead.

"Get it the old fashioned way," Demetri suggested.

"Huh?" I asked, reduced to grunting in my frustration.

"You know, the old fashioned way. Talk to her," he explained with amusement. "Ask her out on a date. Get her to talk about herself. Pump her for information. Wine and dine her."

"That might be pushing it a bit too far. And I don't think you should be using the word 'dine' in any connotation when it comes to me being near Isabella Swan." But it was both strangely appealing and horrifying at the same time. Get to know my prey? That seemed…so wrong. "Plus, I can't see her admitting to believing in vampires and mythical creatures over _fruits de mer _and wine to a total stranger."

"So don't be so strange." He smirked. "After all, how hard can it be to dazzle one little human?"

**X-X-X-X-X**

I decided I would prowl around campus for the next few hours, keeping an eye on Isabella and attempting to immunize myself to her presence and scent. Demetri went back to the flat to rouse Jacob. I lingered in the crowds of students as she went to her next class, even following her into the building and watching her settle into a seat in the classroom. She didn't interact much with the other students, nodding and smiling here and there, keeping mostly to herself. She seemed preoccupied, a faint frown on her face most of the morning.

I tried a number of times to pick up her thoughts, all to no avail. I tried from different distances and locations. I tried to filter singular thoughts of others around her, to see if by not concentrating so hard on her I could pick up the edges of her mind, but I still could hear nothing. It was exasperating, and to be honest, a bit worrisome. If there was some obscure way for a human to block my abilities, who was to say a vampire or other creature wouldn't be able to find it as well? While on a personal level it was rather intriguing, on a professional level, as part of the Volturi and our elite team, the ramifications were far reaching and potentially very serious.

Around one o'clock Demetri and Jacob approached me as I waited on a bench outside the building where Isabella's last class of the day was held. They sat on either side of me, and Jacob leaned forward with his hands on his knees, studying my face.

"You look better this afternoon," he observed.

"'Better' may be a relative term," I replied, reading the genuine concern behind his light words. "But, yes. It is better today."

"So, we wait for her and revisit the scene of the crime?" Jacob was watching the co-eds walk by, winking at a couple of pretty blonds as they passed. They giggled, putting their heads together, and one winked audaciously back. A wide grin crossed his face, and Demetri smacked his arm.

"Jesus, Jacob, focus. You think you'd have gotten that out of your system last night. You should have seen the apartment," Demetri said to me, and suddenly I did, in both his and Jacob's minds. Jacob's little vignette added the details of how the furniture – and the butcher's block table? – got knocked around.

I winced. "Ouch."

Jacob scowled at me, absently rubbing his bicep where Demetri had punched him. "Don't knock it 'til you've tried it, buddy. And get out of my head."

"You can do that with a potato masher?" I asked curiously. "And she liked it?"

"Blech!" Demetri made face. "I'm throwing that out the minute we get back."

"Not if I get to it first," I vowed, and Jacob slapped us both on the side of our heads.

"And you're telling me to focus? How 'bout we come up with a plan, because little girlie's class is over in a few."

Demetri laughed. "All right. Well, Edward seems to be doing okay," he looked at me inquiringly, and I nodded. "So, we'll let him approach the girl. If it looks like he can manage to engage her without going apeshit, we'll go ahead and get a table at the café. That way we'll be closer if something… happens."

"Yeah, but so will he," Jacob pointed out.

"I'll be fine," I said irritably. "I've been around her scent all morning. It's much more tolerable now."

Jacob shook his head and then stood. "Game on, gentlemen. There she is."

Isabella was walking down the steps of the building. She was smiling slightly at a young man walking next to her, and I stiffened. He was leaning very close. Our plan wouldn't work if she had someone with her. In the past couple of weeks, Demetri hadn't reported her bringing a date or a friend to the café when she stopped in the afternoon. She paused, and I concentrated, getting her companion's thoughts loud and clear. I took an involuntary step forward before catching myself. She shook her head at him, smiling softly, telling him something I couldn't quite hear from this distance and through all of the noise of the people on the street. I could read his disappointed acceptance of her kind rejection in his mind, though. I relaxed.

"Edward?" Demetri said questioningly.

"Nothing." I shook my head. "I'm good. Let's go." I took a deep breath, quite possibly the last one of the afternoon. We followed her as she parted from her friend and continued down the street alone.

She seemed tense, looking around more than she had this morning, and I wondered if she could sense she was being followed. She slowed as she neared the café, providing me with the perfect opportunity to "accidentally" bump into her. I held my breath and unconsciously braced myself. I moved purposefully past her, carefully letting my arm knock the satchel from her shoulder. She was very soft.

"Oh, _excusez-moi_," I said politely, pausing and bending down to pick the surprisingly heavy leather bag up off the sidewalk. "_Pardonnez ma maladresse,__ s'il vous plait_."

I smiled a wide, friendly smile and looked at her. It faded as I took in her deathly pale face, her wide, shocked eyes, and her open mouth. She stood stock still, staring up at me. "_Mademoiselle_?"

She gasped, her hand shooting out to clutch at my arm. I jerked away in astonishment and instantly froze. She actually followed my movement, stepping toward me. A low hiss escaped from between my teeth. What the hell?

"It's _you_ – are you okay?" she demanded, reaching out again to touch my sleeve. Her wide brown eyes searched my face.

I was taken completely off guard. It had been years – many of them – since I had felt a willing human touch. It brought back memories of living with Carlisle and my vampire family in the human world. That was the only time I could remember interacting with humans on a routine, daily basis, as part of their lives, not simply as a food source. It was my turn to gasp as a totally inappropriate and unwelcome wave of homesickness washed over me. I gritted my teeth and forced a sense of detachment. The last thing I needed was more intense emotions at this moment.

"I'm sorry," she stuttered, and hesitantly drew her hand back. I couldn't imagine the look on my face – I was so used to being able to see it in the minds of others. I made a conscious and valiant effort to return my features to the smooth attractiveness that would make her more at ease.

"You are American?" I asked to keep up the façade.

"Um, yeah, I am. You're…all right?"

"All right?" I repeated softly in confusion, my brow wrinkling. I had bumped into _her_.

"Um, well, yeah," she repeated. A blush crept over her cheeks, and I eased back infinitesimally. "I, uh, saw you at the café yesterday. You didn't look…well."

I grimaced internally. She was very observant. But then, since I had made certain she was staring at me at the time her scent had overwhelmed me, I was sure there was no way she could have missed my violent reaction.

"Oh, yes. A small problem. Bad…dairy."

"Bad dairy?" She wrinkled her nose in confusion

"Hmm," I hummed noncommittally, trying not to stare.

"I mean," she continued, looking into my face intently, "you looked really ill, or…"

"Bad dairy," I repeated more firmly, turning my eyes on her and doing my dazzle routine, as Jacob liked to call it. "It was nothing."

To my amazement, it had very little effect. She frowned at me. "It was pretty frightening. I know what I saw."

_If you only knew_. "What exactly was that?" I stepped closer to her, towering over her tiny frame.

"It looked like something more than spoiled milk," she insisted.

What was wrong with this girl that she had no sense of self-preservation? Any other human would be cowering and babbling right now. "Well, I am lactose intolerant," I bit out. I fumed internally for a few seconds, and then an involuntary grin twitched at the corner of my mouth at the ridiculous statement. I quashed it before it had time to surface on my face.

She was still frowning, but couldn't miss the ring of truth in my voice even if she missed the humor. She reached out and took her satchel from my hands as I held it out to her. I was careful not to let our fingers touch.

"Oh." She was silent as she contemplated my words. "I guess it's a good thing your friend was there to help you, then," she finally commented, and we stood on the busy sidewalk staring at each other. I desperately wished I could tell what she was thinking. Her eyes traveled down my body to my feet and back up to meet my eyes. "Anyway, I'm really glad you're okay," she said softly with a shy smile. "I was…worried."

I frowned briefly, and then forced a reassuring look across my face. Why would she be concerned over a complete stranger? Regardless, I took advantage of the opportunity before me. "I must apologize, then, for causing you concern. Will you allow me to make it up to you?"

She just stared at me for a few seconds. When I arched my brow inquisitively the blood rose in her cheeks, and she looked down at her feet. I gritted my teeth; did she _want_ to be attacked on the street? I needed a breath to continue speaking, and turned my head slightly to the side to take a burning, scorching draught of air into my tormented lungs. It was drenched with her smell. Jesus.

_Jesus._

"It's okay, you don't need to -" she began, mistaking the look on my face.

I cut her off, my voice velvet and smooth. It was not without effort. "I must insist. It's the least I can do for upsetting a beautiful woman." Her blush intensified, and I cursed myself. "I'm Edward, by the way. Edward Cullen."

"Edward Cullen," I heard her repeat softly under her breath. She smiled tentatively at me. "Hello, Edward. I'm Bella Swan."

Bella. Not Isabella. I'd been thinking of her as Isabella for so long I would have to be sure not to slip up and call her by her full name. "May I buy you a coffee? Revisit the scene of the crime?" I borrowed Jacob's expression and gestured at our café just down the block.

"Okay," she agreed shyly. A grin suddenly spread across her face. "But no dairy."

"No," I agreed solemnly, an answering smile pulling up one side of my mouth as we fell into step together. "No dairy."


	5. Chapter 4: Many Curious Things

**Disclaimer: S. Meyer owns all things Twilight. Me, only these particular words.**

**Thanks to my new permanent betas silentnc and Sarasumbrella, for just being all kinds of awesome.**

**THANK YOU to everyone who takes the time to read this, and especially review. It's amazingly helpful and just makes me smile.**

* * *

**CHAPTER 4: Many Curious Things**

We were shown to her usual table out on the patio at the cafe, and I courteously held out Isabella's – no, Bella's – chair. She thanked me softly, gazing down and placing her satchel at her feet. I noticed her faint blush when I gently placed my hand on the back of her chair as she slid it forward. Her long hair brushed against the back of my hand, and I clutched my fingers into a fist to keep from grabbing a handful. I stalked determinedly around the table to take my seat only to notice that she was still staring down at her hands, clasped together on the table in front of her. I saw Jacob and Demetri seated together at another table near the one I occupied yesterday, set slightly farther back under the awning where they would be less conspicuous. Jacob was facing me, and I nodded at him imperceptibly.

"Bella?" I asked, settling into my chair and leaning forward slightly. "Is something wrong?" My presence must be making her uncomfortable in a variety of ways.

"You're very tall," she blurted, apropos of nothing. Nothing I could fathom, in any case. It certainly wasn't what I was expecting her to say. My frustration at not being able to read her thoughts rose once again, and I knew for certain it wouldn't be the last time.

"I suppose I am," I returned carefully, having no idea where this was heading. It was a new and slightly bewildering experience. "Especially compared to you."

She looked up at me with a grin, and I was mortified at my thoughtless comment. She had me more off-balance than I realized. "Bella, I am sorry. That was unforgivably rude of me to -"

She interrupted me with a shrug and a musical laugh. "No, it's true. I'm a munchkin."

I smiled in return at her words. They reminded me of my sister Alice, who I would swear had real pixie blood in her if I didn't know better. "You are rather delicate," I admitted. She had no idea how true that was.

She snorted, and I laughed – it was such a strange sound coming from her. She grinned again at my amusement, staring at me unabashedly. "What?" I asked.

"Laughter looks good on you," she said simply, and just like that I was undone. My heretofore unalterable reality tilted and blurred, and when it refocused, only the girl before me was clear.

I was stunned into silence. I faintly heard Demetri's voice in my head. _Edward? Problem? _At the same time Bella asked, "Edward?"

"I'm fine, sorry," I answered them both absently, trying to make sense of what had just happened.

The waiter approached, and Bella placed her usual order for a flavored cappuccino and pastries. I ordered plain coffee, as I didn't want to address any questions about my diet at the moment. I realized I was staring at her, still trying to fathom what had caused such a startling sea change in my perception of this particular human.

"So," she said casually once he had left with our order. "What brings a mid-west boy to Paris?"

She was very perceptive. I had already noted that fact, but it was something I was going to have to keep in mind. It had been many years, and I'd been to many, many places since my human childhood in Chicago. I was surprised she could place my almost imperceptible speech pattern, especially since it was from Chicago of a bygone era. Her question was basic enough, though; common for breaking the ice, and one for which I had a ready answer. "Work, mostly. And you?"

"School." She shrugged. "Can I ask what you do, Edward?"

I settled back in my seat and tried to appear innocuous. "I work for a private international company. We have many diversified interests – development, consulting, investing, security."

She nodded, looking more intrigued than satisfied. "What's your area?"

"I solve problems," I told her, watching her face closely. "I help investigate potential issues that might be detrimental to the company and send the information back to be handled in our best interests." I could see she had more questions, so I swiftly deflected the conversation back to her. "Why school in Paris? It's a long way from the…Southwest?" I said questioningly, even though I knew her history without having to use some speech analysis of my own.

She nodded. "I grew up with my mom in Phoenix." A shadow crossed her face, and I didn't have to guess at the cause. I started to reach out to touch her, but withdrew just in time, staring at my offending hand. What was I thinking, wanting to comfort a human? Not only that, but one touch from my ice cold fingers and her perceptive nature would cause problems I did not need. Of course, she noticed my withdrawal, and her shoulders slumped slightly. Unfamiliar guilt crawled up my spine.

"Why does that make you sad?" I asked quietly. I wondered if she'd tell me about her mother's death.

She met my gaze, her soft brown eyes suddenly damp. It was a test of my control to not touch her, to grab her up in my arms, to…offer comfort. Only the knowledge that she definitely would not be comforted by my embrace held me in place. It wasn't the desire for her blood, or the fact that it would probably give away my true nature – it wasn't these valid concerns that stopped me. It was because I didn't want to upset her. The magnitude of the problem I was creating for myself didn't escape my awareness, but for the first time in my existence I found that I didn't care.

"My mom died almost two years ago," she admitted softly. She reached out across the table this time, and I could not deny her unconscious plea. I settled for lightly rubbing her arm where it was covered by the sleeve of her thin sweater. Her hand went limp on the table, accepting my touch gratefully. She looked up into my face and saw my concern. It was an honest emotion; I was past playing her. "She was my best friend, and I miss her every single day," she whispered.

"I'm sorry, Bella," I murmured with sincerity. Her hand had turned to brush my arm through my sleeve, much like I was touching her. I realized we were leaning over the table toward each other, and I had been taking breaths to speak without having to wrestle the urge to attack her with every shred of my control. The desire was still there, waiting, but it had taken a backseat to my interest in this girl.

Thankfully, the waiter appeared with our order. I took the opportunity to ease back, my thoughts whirling. Over the past few minutes my overriding focus had been curiosity and concern, not the wild desire for her blood that had been consuming me for the past twenty-four hours. I wasn't sure what to make of this, but it made me uneasy. I tried once again to touch her mind and was frustrated beyond belief when I was met with the same silent void. I was curious – so curious – and I had not felt that emotion about anything in a very long time. What was she thinking? What made Isabella Swan so intriguing?

"So," I continued after the waiter had left, my cool fingers wrapping around my warm coffee mug. "Why Paris? It's a far cry from Phoenix."

"I promised my mom I would go out and feed my soul." She smiled sadly, picking at her pastry, and I stiffened slightly at her choice of words. "I've always been kind of quiet and studious. I never got out much. I felt like I needed to see Paris, London, Scotland, and Rome…I felt like I was looking…" Her eyes were far away, lost in memories as she stared blankly over my shoulder. It gave me a chance to study her charming features. She shook her head, glancing at me quickly before staring back down at her plate. "I've always been a voracious reader. I love any form of literature, so I decided to study what I love. The Sorbonne has a wonderful Literature and Language college, so I came here." Her eyes darted to mine and then quickly away. I wondered at her odd glance. "It just seemed…well, it just felt right to be here for a while."

"You don't have any other family?" I asked, even though I knew she did.

A smile curved her lovely mouth. "My dad, Charlie. He's Chief of Police in a small Pacific Northwest town. He and my mom divorced years ago, but we see each other as often as we can manage. He couldn't understand why I needed to come to this 'fancy foreign place'."

It was time to refocus on the game and establish a common bond. "My family is from the Pacific Northwest as well. Near Hoquiam," I told her.

Her face lit with surprise and pleasure. "Charlie lives in Forks."

I returned her smile. "A coincidence, it seems. Imagine having to travel to France to meet when our families are only miles apart."

"Your family is still there?" Curiosity lit her face.

"Yes." I gave her the Cullen family's current established background in the human world. "I was adopted by my aunt and her husband after my parents died. My adopted brothers and sisters live there as well."

"Your parents died, too?" she questioned softly, sympathy softening her features. "Both of them?"

"Yes." I was uncomfortable with her kindness. I was surprised to find myself shifting in my seat – vampires don't fidget. "It was many, many years ago. I was very young."

She sat quite still, but I could sense her mind working. Once again, I futilely wished I could hear her thoughts. "Do you see your family often?" she finally asked, her voice wistful.

"No." I couldn't keep the forbidding tone out of my voice. It was not a subject I addressed with anyone.

"I didn't spend too much time in Washington with Charlie, just some summers and vacations when I was younger. I mostly grew up with my mom in Phoenix. They divorced when I was just a baby." She put both hands around her cappuccino and hunched her shoulders.

"So it was just you and your mother?" I tried valiantly to steer the conversation back to my objective.

She grimaced. "Most of the time. My mom was a bit…flighty. She was really wonderful," Bella rushed on, in case I misunderstood, "but sometimes I felt like the parent. She kind of had poor judgment in boyfriends." The look on my face must have been somewhat alarming, because as she looked up at me she froze, and quickly added, "Oh, no, nothing like that! It's just they were too much like her – a bit scatter-brained, a bit irresponsible, just going with the flow. There was no one who was capable of taking care of her."

"Not like you," I murmured insightfully, and she shrugged one shoulder.

None of the Volturi's research had shed light on what it must have been like for Isabella Swan growing up. It seemed like a lot of responsibility and stress for a young girl. It explained a lot about her caring but introverted nature.

She reached out across the table once again, and I cautiously moved my hand to hers. It should be warm enough from gripping my coffee mug not to not draw attention to its abnormally cool temperature. Her fingers were light as down on my palm, and I gently closed my grip. A jolt of sensation sparked up my arm straight to the center of my chest at the first touch of our skin, and it was only due to the control I was already exerting over myself that I hid my startled reaction. She sighed at the contact, the sound causing my eyes to fly to hers. They were on our clasped hands, an undecipherable expression on her face.

"About a year or so before she…passed, she did finally meet someone," Bella said softly, and I forced my attention back to the conversation. A sad smile twisted her full mouth. "She said it was just her luck. She met Phil not long before we got the diagnosis. He was really wonderful, and so good to us. I don't think I could have made it without him."

"Phil?" I asked, and instead of victory I felt a strange stab of foreboding. She had to be speaking of the vampire Phillip.

Her fingers tightened briefly on my hand. "She met Phil during one of her world history phases; she took a class at the local community college. He was the professor." I pursed my lips thoughtfully. It would be a fitting position for a vampire of Phillip's age, he was well over 400 years old, older than Carlisle. He knew plenty about world history, having lived quite a bit of it firsthand.

"She was just her usual giddy self. She was in love again." Bella didn't lift her gaze from our hands as she continued. "But he was really different than her usual boyfriends. He actually had a good head on his shoulders. He took care of her – he took care of us. Nobody ever did that before," she admitted softly, finally meeting my gaze with a sad smile. "Well, other than Charlie."

"What happened…after?" I asked quietly.

She sighed, sitting back and reluctantly pulling her hand out of mine. I could feel the lingering warmth from her soft flesh in my palm and closed my fingers over it. "After Renee passed, it was hard for both Phil and me, I think. He got another teaching offer, a really good one, and moved out of the country." She paused, staring off into space. After a moment she shook her head in an effort to brush off the sad mood and attempted a smile for me. "How did we get onto such a depressing subject? I don't usually talk about it – especially to someone I just met. You must think I'm a nut. A depressing nut."

"No, I don't think that at all," I replied slowly, leaning forward onto my elbows. "Phil just left you? After your mother was gone, I mean?" For some reason this bothered me.

"No." She looked at me quizzically. "He waited until he was sure I was all set and that everything was okay. He stayed with me for months after she was gone. After her affairs were settled, I had quite a bit more financial security than I had anticipated, and I was a bit…restless. I always have been, but it was worse after Renee was gone." Bella looked into my face as if trying to see something there, and I leaned cautiously back in my seat. "I felt like I needed to find something, something that wasn't where I was." She gave a short laugh and another quick shake of her head. "So I did something I always wanted to do – travel. And I ended up here."

"Lucky for me," I said, grinning at her, and was rewarded with her smile in return.

"Luck…" she mused softly, shaking her head.

"What? You don't believe in luck?" I teased, and she arched her brows at me. "What would you call our meeting in Paris, of all places? Wait!" I pretended a horrified look. "Please don't tell me you're with somebody? Have a boyfriend? Met someone?"

She laughed, and her beautiful face just lit up. "No," she chuckled. "I haven't met 'someone'." Her laughter faded. "Just you."

"Just me," I repeated with more satisfaction that the situation warranted. "You mentioned you loved literature. What are your favorite works?"

We sat at the table talking for hours. I wasn't aware of the passing time; my fascination with Bella Swan was complete. We discussed and argued about a variety of literary subjects, including the fact that she was into classic chick literature – Jane Austin, the Bronte sisters – whereas my interest lay more with Alexandre Dumas – _The Count of Monte Cristo_, _The Three Musketeers_.

"Figures," she grinned at me. "Such a guy thing, into action and adventure."

She teased and taunted and was interested in what I had to say. It was an afternoon and a conversation like none I'd ever experienced before. She completely intoxicated me – her scent, her voice, her movements, her mind. I didn't realize that Jacob and Demetri had left their table to take positions on the street outside of the cafe. It was only when Jacob began singing Christmas carols as loud as he could in his head that the time finally caught my attention. I glanced down at my watch and grimaced.

"I'm taking up way too much of your time, aren't I?" She sighed, leaning back, her expressive eyes dark and sad.

"What? No," I responded. "Really, it's been one of the best afternoons I can remember." I smiled at her, and she returned it hesitantly.

She reached down for her satchel and brought it to her lap, signaling she was prepared to leave. I panicked. I had no idea what to say to make her stay, to make her realize that I didn't want her to go. She sat in her seat and stared at me while I struggled.

"Edward…" she began, her voice trailing off as she bit her lip, sitting on the edge of her chair. "I'd like to see you again." I could see the blood rising in her cheeks.

I exhaled in relief and grinned. "I was just trying to figure out how to ask you the same." I felt like a teenager for the first time since I'd been changed.

"Yeah?" she asked softly, looking up at me.

"Yeah," I admitted, running my hand through my hair. "I…uh, have a thing tonight." It was something I'd just remembered, tickets purchased by Volturi, Inc. as part of our continuing cover. We never used them, just purchased them for appearances sake, but I realized they would be very useful in this situation. "I have tickets to an event at the Musee d'Orsay tonight, an after-hours thing. It's a charity or fundraiser event. They'll have food and drinks, and you can see the exhibits, kind of behind the scenes. I wasn't planning on attending on my own, but… would you be interested in going with me?"

She paused, emotion warring in her eyes. I held my breath. "I'd love to see you tonight, Edward, but…that sounds kind of…fancy." She worried her lower lip again between her teeth, and I wanted to take a nip of her and not stop there.

I mentally shook my head, bringing it back to the subject at hand. Of course, she was concerned about what to wear; I'd lived with women for long enough, Alice and Rosalie and Esme, to realize that much. I also knew there was no way she would accept a gift of that magnitude from me yet. I swiftly calculated what an appropriate dress would cost and where we could locate one on such short notice.

"My sister shops at a store downtown. They know her quite well. I'm sure they could come up with something for tonight."

"Edward," she said softly and stopped, watching me miserably.

"Don't worry about it, Bella. I invited you. I'm more than happy to supply the accoutrements. I just want to see you tonight. Would you let me take you shopping for a dress?" I suddenly wanted to do this for her, very much. I had more money than I could spend even in my existence. I could certainly afford it, and I didn't want her wasting her limited funds just because I had asked her out on a date.

I caught myself. I had actually asked her out on a date. My first date ever. I fought back a laugh. Better late than never – yeah, like over one hundred years late.

She shook her head definitively. "I won't let you pay for a dress, Edward. That just wouldn't be…I wouldn't feel right. You may have asked, but I did accept." A look of determination crossed her pretty features. "If you have some suggestions, though, as to what would be appropriate, I'd appreciate them. I wouldn't want to embarrass you."

I leaned forward earnestly. "You couldn't, Bella. You'll be lovely no matter what you wear."

Blood flooded her cheeks again, and I had to force myself to ease back and stay on my side of the table. "Well then, I don't want to embarrass _me_." We both laughed. "Do you have the name of the shop?"

My photographic memory recalled the name, the location, and the phone number perfectly. "Yes. Would you like to go and see what we can find?"

"Yes, thank you," she said simply. "Let me go use the restroom. I'll be right back."

She rose and walked away while I pulled out my cell phone. I contemplated briefly, tapping it in my hard palm, and dialed the number. My family was a good enough client that I was sure I could arrange a "discount" on any dress Bella chose. I planned on covering any cost beyond what would be just this side of reasonable for a college student. She had mentioned she had some money from her mother's life insurance policy, but I had no idea of her actual financial situation. I left my AmEx number with the owner of the shop, Madame L'Heureaux, along with my explicit instructions.


	6. Chapter 5: Behold Yourself

**Disclaimer: Twilight stuff is Stephenie Meyer's. The rest here is mine.**

**Thanks to Sarahsumbrella and silentnc for their wonderful beta skills and encouragement - any leftover errors are purely mine.**

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**CHAPTER FIVE: Behold Yourself**

I called Demetri, explaining the change in plans. I knew I was blurring the lines. Somewhere during the afternoon I had lost track of the job and was going on a _date_. I was seeing a woman because I wanted to - because I was intrigued and interested, in 'that way'. It had never happened to me before, and I was worried Demetri could tell. He was silent for a long moment and then assured me quietly he and Jacob would cover us tonight.

Bella returned to the table. She frowned when she saw I had already taken care of the bill, and I rolled my eyes. As if I'd really miss the approximately six Euros her coffee and pastry had cost.

"That's not the point, Edward," she argued as we walked out of the cafe. I put my hand on her lower back protectively as we stepped onto the busy sidewalk.

Her scent scorched me. I could feel the heat of her body through her sweater, and my fingertips joined the burning in my throat and chest.

"Well, what is the point?" I teased back.

She frowned adorably as I hailed a cab and helped her slide in. "Well, not that." I laughed and gave the driver the address to the dress shop.

Bella's eyes widened slightly as she saw the area our destination took us, but closed her features when she caught me watching her. She consciously stopped herself from the nervous habit of biting her lip and looked at me out of the corner of her eye, tugging on the hem of her sweater. I may not have much experience with dating, but I certainly recognized a woman uncomfortable with social appearances.

"Don't worry," I assured her softly as I paid the cab driver and we exited onto the quiet street. "Madame L'Heureaux has known my family well for many years. She's very nice."

I held the nondescript door open for her, and as we entered we were enveloped in the scent of lavender and vanilla. Almost immediately, Madame L'Heureaux herself glided toward us, tall, blond, and statuesque. I knew she had an eclectic and fascinating history even before her thoughts trickled through mine.

"Monsieur Cullen, how wonderful to see you again. It has been much too long, many years, has it not?" She air-kissed both my cheeks as I bent slightly to allow the greeting. She took a step back, careful not to touch me. She did know my family well. Her experienced and knowledgeable eye took in Bella's much shorter form hovering slightly behind me. "And this is Mademoiselle Swan, surely." She made an approving noise, taking Bella's hand and smiling widely at me. "But she is lovely, _oui?_ Oh, the beautiful things we can find for her! Monsieur Cullen, please sit." She gestured me to a large, overstuffed chair sitting at one edge of a clearing in the displays of fabrics and fashions. "Marie will bring you refreshment. Please let us know if you require anything – anything at all. Mademoiselle Swan and I will get to work!"

She whisked Bella off in the direction of some small rooms running along one side of the shop. Bella's white face peered at me from around Madame's form in anxiety, fear, and excitement before I lost sight of her. I lowered myself into a chair with a sigh. A small, dark haired girl appeared with a crystal glass of amber liquid, and I immediately recognized the scent of Jasper's favorite brandy – yes, they did know my family well. I smiled to myself, taking the glass with a murmur of thanks. Not that my knuckleheaded brother actually ever drank it, of course, but he had the annoying affectation of sniffing it appreciatively. I found myself doing the same, made a face, and immediately set it aside.

The girl lingered, staring, her eyes and thoughts admiring, but I barely noticed. I could smell the different luxurious fabrics and materials surrounding me as I settled deeper in the chair, more content and calm than I could remember being in many, many years. I'd never really appreciated the shop before, on the few occasions Alice managed to force me along with her, it had been purely obligation. Was it Bella that made the difference? I frowned, staring at the smooth, mellow wood of the floor in consternation.

The murmur of Bella's voice mingling with Madame L'Heureaux's pulled me out of my contemplations. I could only make out words here and there, and finally resorted to listening to Madame's mind. I saw Bella in her mind's eye, clad only in white, lacy things, and immediately tried to distract myself, attempting to block the visual images and concentrate only on the auditory. I was only partially successful. Madame was very complimentary in her thoughts to Bella's shape; she thought it was wonderful to have such a figure to work with. So did I…

Finally, after more than an hour, they had The Dress. I saw the image briefly in Madame's head, but the sight of Bella actually before me in the garment sucked the air out of my lungs. She was exquisite. The dress was a deep, midnight blue, almost black, shimmering in startling bursts of deep color. It was fitted and sleek, showing off her slender form to perfection. She was elegant, beautiful, and…shy. She blushed deeply as I continued to stare, her teeth sinking into that succulent lower lip, and I had to temper my grip on the chair so as not to crush it with the burst of desire I felt for her. She called to me on so many primitive levels.

Madame made a pleased noise in her throat, recognizing masculine approval. Her thoughts were fairly screaming with satisfaction and smugness. As she briefly thought of the cost of the dress, shoes, bag and hose, I realized she had every right to be happy, and not just with a job well done. That was the least of my concern, however.

How was I going to keep my mouth off of Isabella Swan tonight? I had serious doubts about my control and response to temptation. This was a huge mistake.

"Edward?" Bella's eyes had gone wide with dismay at my expression. Madame scowled, disapproving of my manners.

I slowly crossed the small distance that separated me from the lovely girl, stopping prudent inches away. Her heart rate was accelerated, the blood rushing through her system deliciously, swirling in her cheeks and upper chest. I didn't dare touch her, but stared into her eyes. I realized they were starting to fill with uncertain tears, and I cursed myself for being…what I was.

"Bella," I murmured softly, making a concentrated effort to keep my hands at my sides. "You look amazing. Seeing you in that…you quite literally take my breath away."

Her eyes widened on mine once again. "Really?" she breathed, her heart pounding in excitement and delight. I blinked slowly, allowing that to be my only outward response to her maddening aroma.

"Yes." I tipped my head toward Madame, never taking my eyes from Bella's. "We'll take it. If you'd like," I said to her.

"Yes." She spun in a delighted circle, and I squeezed my eyes shut in agony as the _smell_ wafted over me. I opened them to see her preening in the mirror, and even in my suffering I couldn't help a small smile. She tossed me a truly happy grin, and I watched her bounce back to the dressing room.

"Monsieur Cullen?" Madame spoke in rapid French, well aware I spoke the language fluently. "I have a small token that might interest you. When I saw Mademoiselle Swan, well, it reminded me of her, and I wondered if you wouldn't feel the same?"

I raised a brow inquiringly, and she strode gracefully to a door behind a small desk. She disappeared inside, emerging a moment later holding a small box. "It is something I found at an antique auction. I haven't had a chance to put it out on display yet." She held the box in one hand and opened the top. Inside, nestled on velvet, was a delicate dragonfly brooch. It was elegant and complicated, swirling in dark blue and purple opalescence with tiny, shining gems and dark silver work. I exhaled, extending a finger unthinkingly toward it. It was beautiful, young, and fresh, and it was Bella.

"It's lovely," I murmured, pulling my hand back. "I'll take it. Thank you."

She smiled benignly, happy with the afternoon's sale, the romance, and her part in it.

"Would you like to take it with you?" she asked, knowing I had made arrangements to have Bella's other purchases delivered to her flat.

"Yes, please." She shut the lid and handed it to me as Bella walked back out into the main room. I tucked it quickly into my jacket pocket.

With a deep, bracing breath, Bella approached the desk and pulled out her credit card. I sauntered away, feigning interest in a silk display, eavesdropping shamelessly. I smiled to myself when I heard the total Madame gave Bella, and the convoluted argument and discussion that followed in both English and French. I hid a smile – Madame's English was as good as mine, but she was a very good actress. With a final sigh, Bella handed over her credit card and signed the slip, giving Madame her address for delivery.

After making certain the items would be delivered right away, Bella joined me in the entryway, and we exited the shop. I winked with a mouthed "_merci_" to Madame L'Heureaux. She winked back and waved with a delighted grin.

Bella was silent, looking at me out of the corner of her eye as we waited for a cab. I finally secured one and again allowed my hand linger on her waist as I helped her inside. I slid in beside her, cocking an eyebrow as she continued to stare at me after giving the driver her address. I began to get nervous, an emotion I couldn't remember ever having experienced since I'd been changed. Was she having second thoughts about accompanying me tonight? After all, we'd only just met this afternoon. Was I rushing her?

Wait…wait. This wasn't supposed to be about a date, I argued with myself. This was about finding out what she knew so we could finish our assignment. _Right._ _Sure it was._ The problem with being a solitary creature for nigh onto a century – well, one of the problems, anyway – was that I could not lie to myself. This was all about the intriguing and desirable woman sitting next to me. I was so fucked.

"Edward," she began in a tone I was starting to recognize. It meant I was in trouble. "What did you do?"

"What?" I questioned, my mind frantically jumping through my behavior this afternoon. Had I given myself away somehow? She was just so damned observant. "What?"

She pursed her lips and raised her own brow, turning to look out the window of the cab. "I'm not stupid, you know."

I began a mild internal panic. What had I done to give myself away? She had seemed fine before we went into the dress shop. Had Madame said something to her? What had she noticed? I managed to keep my features impassive and aloof as I stared at her profile.

She sighed, turning to look at me. "Nothing to say?" she asked.

"What do you want me to say?" I asked carefully, sitting straight and still.

She humpfed. "Do you really think I don't know what a dress like that costs? Really? Not to mention the shoes, the handbag, the hose, the wrap…" she trailed off, shaking her head, and the smallest smile tugged at her mouth. "I know it cost more than a couple hundred dollars, Edward. I'm not that naive, you know."

"This is about the dress?" I didn't know whether to laugh in amusement or howl in frustration. Her scent was seriously messing with my brain.

"Of course." She scowled.

Well, she'd really be upset when she saw the brooch. I swiftly reconsidered giving it to her tonight. She probably thought we were moving too fast. We were moving too fast. But I had such a…_compulsion_ toward her. My body recognized my mate, even though my head was still trying to bombard me with reason.

Holy…No. _Wait_. Did I just say mate? _No, no way._ I wanted her – sexually, feeding wise, as company maybe until then, but…My mate? I almost snorted with amusement. I figured Rosalie was rolling around in hysterics just about now, figuring I'd finally gotten what I deserved. I'd fallen for a human, and not just any human, but the one person on this earth I could not resist murdering eventually. And I would end up murdering her. I was just marking time, satisfying my curiosity. I couldn't lie to myself – even I knew no one could fight so hard, struggle with a basic instinct this strong, this compelling, without eventually slipping. Not even me.

"Edward." Her hand touched my sleeve, and she pulled it back as I literally jerked out of my morbid, stunned thoughts. A jolt shot through me when her fingers brushed along the top of my thigh as she withdrew. She inhaled sharply, and I knew she felt it, too. I raised my eyes to hers, putting everything I had into making them soft and merely curious. "Thank you," she said softly.

I nodded. I was glad she wasn't going to make an issue about the cost of the dress and my underhanded arrangements. "You're welcome, Bella."

We sat in silence until we pulled up in front of her building. "This is me," she said, smiling. I got out of the cab, holding the door for her. "Do you need the address, or can you find it again tonight?"

_Tonight and every other night until this is done_, I thought. "I'll be fine," I told her. "I'll see you at seven thirty?" I reached into the inside pocket of my jacket to pull out a card with my cell phone number on it, and my fingers brushed the box with the dragonfly. "In case you need to get in touch with me," I explained as I handed the card to her.

"Oh!" she rummaged around in her satchel, pulling out a pen and a tattered piece of paper. "Here's mine."

She scribbled on the torn scrap and handed it to me. I held it in my fingers. "Until tonight, Bella," I murmured, leaning down to barely brush her cheek with my cold lips. She shivered and clutched at my jacket, stopping me as I turned to get back in the cab. I looked at her questioningly as she glared down at her feet in embarrassment.

"What is it?" I asked.

She glanced quickly up at me and then back down at her feet. I couldn't see her face, but I could tell by the intensifying scent and sound of her blood rushing through her heart that she was blushing yet again. "It's just…You promise you're coming back?" She lifted her face to meet my eyes.

"Of course," I assured her softly. I couldn't stop myself from holding her in my arms, pulling her into my chest, against my leather jacket. I had to touch her. "I'll be here, tonight, right at seven thirty. I promise."

"Okay," she sniffed, but I didn't smell tears. Thank God. She sniffed again, and I pulled her back to look at her face warily. Her eyes were hazy and soft as they met mine, a gentle smile on her lips.

"You smell incredible," she told me in a dazed voice. I could sense her arousal. I stiffened; her attraction to my scent only reminded me of who I was, what I was, and the danger involved in letting myself…want.

I stepped away, and she swayed slightly. I steadied her and then threw myself into the cab. "I'll see you tonight," I said to her confused expression, motioning for the cab driver to get me out of there.

I stared moodily out of the cab window as it drove back to the flat I shared with Jacob and Demetri. I groaned silently. What was I doing? Why was I torturing myself? Why was I so damned attracted to Isabella Swan? Other than the obvious – she smelled like the most addictive of ambrosia. But that wasn't what kept me coming back like a heroin addict looking for a fix. What was I thinking?

Obviously, I wasn't thinking – at all. And that was completely unlike me. All I did was think – obsessively – about every little detail. It was the consequence of being immortal and having nothing but time and the company of only one's self for eternity.


	7. Chapter 6: Sweet Creature

**Twilight stuff = Stephenie Meyer. All the rest here = mine**

**lots of X's and O's to my betas silentnc and Sarahsumbrella. They do good, any bad is all me.**

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**CHAPTER SIX : Sweet Creature**

Demetri was grumbling as we dressed for the dinner event. He would be attending as well, in order to provide support and back-up, just in case. Jacob adamantly refused to dress up.

"I'll wait outside," he insisted, slouching in one of the overstuffed chairs in the living area, flipping idly through the French television channels. "You don't need me in the museum, and I don't need to wear a monkey suit."

"Fine, _dog_," Demetri scowled. "I hope it rains."

Jacob shrugged, and I walked into the bedroom I was occupying to finish straightening my tie. I had opted for a more casual tuxedo for the evening, fitted and black but with a long, thin tie instead of a bow. The suit hung on my tall frame acceptably. I knew it looked good, and I didn't mind dressing. I had an appreciation for fine fabrics and cuts of clothes – I was a sensory creature, and the scent, fit, and feel of them was very pleasurable.

I walked into the private bathroom, peering into the mirror at my eyes. My face hardened as I stared into the violent crimson of my irises. It only reminded me of the monster I was, and how I would be spending the evening trying to resist killing the sweet creature that was Bella Swan. I put the contacts in with a bit more force than was necessary and examined the result. The odd violet hue hid any indication of the true color of my eyes – the true color of my nature.

I stepped back out into the main area, and Jacob looked up at me with a raised brow and smirk. He let loose with a mocking wolf whistle, and I cuffed him upside his head.

"Are you ready?" I asked. I had to admit he did look comfortable in black jeans and a soft black pullover.

"'I was born ready'," he quoted, and I cuffed him again. He ducked agilely out of the way so that I only barely made contact.

"I don't know why we have to go through all this," Demetri grumbled, emerging in his tux. He ran his finger along the collar, grimacing. "How is _this_ going to help you read her mind? If you couldn't do it this afternoon, what difference does all this make?"

"Weren't you the one who said to wine and…urm…spend time with her?" I asked. "Get the information we need by talking to her?"

"Yeah, yeah" he grunted. "I'm an idiot. I didn't think you'd take it this far."

Jacob chuckled. "Well, you should have figured he'd never settle for something simple. Not our wittle Edward."

He stood, shoving his arms into my black leather jacket. I grabbed the collar and yanked it off with a raised brow, throwing it back in to the bedroom I was using for my belongings. He sighed, stomping off into his room to rustle up his own coat.

"Come on, ladies," I urged them, holding the door open with a flourish.

They took a cab to arrive at the museum well before Bella and me. I went around the corner of our building to the underground parking garage. The Volturi maintained a small fleet of cars in most major metropolitan areas, and I had chosen a sleek, black Aston Martin for the evening.

As I drove, I contemplated the potential pitfalls of the evening as well as the pleasures. I had to admit to myself it wasn't all business – I had the strongest urge to see Isabella Swan again, and it had nothing to do with her knowledge of vampires and other creatures. It also didn't have to do with her siren's scent – well, not completely. I actually wanted to talk to her, to discuss different and various topics, and get her unique and entertaining perspective on them. Her draw was like that of the infamous forbidden fruit. I knew I shouldn't want it, I certainly shouldn't eat it, and I really shouldn't be anywhere close to the temptation. I just could not stop testing my limits, my control, and the attraction she held for me.

An unfamiliar tension tightened my chest as I pulled up to her building. I sat brooding on the street in the car, sifting through my emotions and examining the strength of my will this evening. My usual apathy and indifference was nowhere to be found. I was…excited.

Excitement was not good for my control. I tipped my head and waited until I was sure that I could separate my eagerness to see her from the desire to feed. Could I maintain control for the hours we would be together tonight? I would have to, otherwise…No. There was no otherwise. I could, and certainly would, do this.

I tipped the doorman generously to watch the Aston while I swiftly ran up the four flights of stairs to Bella's flat. I detected her scent in the lobby and followed it up the steps and onto her floor. I could have found her even without the number to the apartment. I stood for a moment outside her door, breathing in purposefully, trying to desensitize myself to her scent as much as I could before I raised my knuckles to knock gently. I heard her heartbeat accelerate and the rustle of the fabric of her dress, the slide of silk hose and undergarments, the tap of her shoes. Her aroma intensified as she approached the door. It washed over me like a living thing as she swung it open and stood framed in the soft light.

I flinched, both in reaction to the pain in my throat and stomach and the sight before me. She was beautiful. The dress fit her perfectly, outlining and emphasizing her small frame and curves. She had done that feminine _something_ with her hair; it was gathered loosely at the back of her head, cascading down her back in soft waves and curls. It must be genetic programming – females instinctively put their hair up so that males could only think of taking it down. I stared. She blushed.

"Hi," she said quietly, hanging in the doorway before forcing herself back and gesturing me into the apartment. "Just let me get my bag and wrap."

I took one small, cautious step forward, bracing myself, and stood just in the entryway. She turned to the sofa where her wrap was draped, and I had to wait for her to come back to me to help swirl the fringed, silky material around her shoulders. It took more effort than I could have imagined to just stand there in the open doorway with her in the room. The thought of being enclosed in the small flat with her awake and moving around caused me to shudder. She glanced back over her shoulder with an inquiring look. I realized I had said nothing since she opened the door.

"Hello, Bella. You look lovely," I managed.

The blush returned, and I swallowed convulsively. "Thank you. You look…amazing." Her eyes traveled from my toes to the tips of my ruthlessly, and uselessly, tamed hair. I heard her breathing increase and the sharp tang of arousal mingled with her luscious aroma. "Wow."

She bit her lower lip and looked away. I had another moment of frustration and hunger warring within me before I wrestled it back. "Are you ready?" I asked softly, and when she looked back up at me my face was smooth and calm once again.

She nodded, and I extended my elbow for her to take. She smiled, hooking her arm around mine. I was very careful not to let our bare skin touch as I escorted her to the elevator lobby. I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye, not able to resist admiring her.

"I don't think you want to take the stairs in those shoes." I looked down at them. The high, spiky heels made her legs appear miles long, subtly curved and toned. The soft shimmer of the silk hose clinging to them made me swallow again, but her blood and mouthwatering aroma were not on my mind.

She grinned and rolled her eyes. "I'll be lucky if I make it down to the lobby without wiping out and taking you with me. These things are wicked – fair warning."

I tightened my elbow around her hand to carefully guide her into the elevator. "They look great," I said honestly.

"Well, I thought this dress called for more than my usual Chucks," she grinned. I raised my eyebrows in question at the unfamiliar term.

"Chucks?" she pressed, imitating my look. "You know, sneakers? Tennis shoes? Trainers? Converse?"

I shrugged helplessly, and she laughed. "Never mind. I'll show you later."

We made it down to the lobby and out to the street with no mishaps. As I took the car key from the doorman, Bella stopped on the sidewalk, staring at the car.

"What is that?" she asked breathlessly. I opened the door and held it for her, frowning at the vehicle.

"A…car?" I couldn't fathom, for the umpteenth time, what she was thinking.

"What kind of car?" She hadn't moved.

"The kind you drive." I smiled, shaking my head at her. "Are you going to get in?"

She shifted her stare from the car to me, walking slowly to the curb. "Is this thing yours?"

"No," I said as she slid in. She let out a sigh of pleasure, curling into the seat, and I looked at her face sharply. She smiled and closed her eyes, inhaling. "It's a company car."

I shut the door with perhaps a bit too much force and stalked around the hood to the driver's side, chanting a mantra of control. I took a deep breath before getting in, knowing it was going to be pure torture in the small space with the perfume of her warm body. I would have to try to breathe as little as possible. My plan was all shot to hell when I turned to look at her sitting next to me.

The carefully stored air left my lungs in a gasp as I watched her stretch like a cat in the seat, humming with delight. "What kind of car is this, Edward, really?" she asked, her eyes half shut. "It's marvelous."

The sight of her experiencing such blatant, extravagant pleasure in the soft leather and design of the luxury vehicle sent my head spinning. "It's a…uh...an Aston Martin."

"Aston Martin," she purred, looking at me through her long, dark eyelashes. "Well hellooo, Mr. Martin."

I barked out an involuntary laugh. It sounded old, rusty, and unused to my ears. She hummed with a slow, sexy curve of her lips, and I concentrated on starting the car. The soft rasp of silk, the low rumblings of enjoyment in her chest, the sensual way she moved, her thick, potent scent – it was all conspiring to drive me mad. I almost shook with the knowledge that no one could stop me from taking her, right now. Her body and her life were mine in that instant. No one would know.

Except for me. I…coveted her. I could no more hurt her than turn back time. I wanted to pull her small body into the curve of my much larger one. I wanted to cover her and protect her, I wanted to absorb her. I was teetering on that fine edge of obsession. Everything about her – her scent, her look, her blocked thoughts – it all intrigued, engaged and involved me. I'd never felt like this about anyone or anything, ever. It was terrifying.

I started the car, and Bella imitated the low purr of the engine deep in her throat. I gulped venom, putting the car in first gear a little more roughly than the occasion warranted. I managed to pull away from the curb, and she turned her head to grin at me.

"This is amazing, Edward," she said. "I'd love to take this baby out into the country and see what kind of fun we could have. Seth would go mad if he saw me in this."

Conflicting emotions warred within me. She really did want to be with me despite my…strangeness? _Did she have absolutely no sense of self preservation?_ I wondered again. And, I, too, imagined the kind of fun we could have out in the country. Alone. Together. But…who the hell was Seth?

"Who is Seth?" I managed to edit the thought, but I had to know. Of all the things I needed to ask that was the least important in the long run, but the most important to me at the moment.

"I grew up with Seth in Washington. He was my best friend. His dad and mine were buddies. We spent our entire childhood together. He was always tinkering with cars, he and his friends. Built and repaired a ton of them. He got me hooked on the pleasures of a properly engineered vehicle."

I contemplated this in silence as I drove through the city. There was a smolder in my chest that had nothing to do with my appetite.

"Do you still see him?" I hadn't wanted to ask as it was none of my business, but the question issued forth against my will.

She was quiet for a moment, and I glanced at her out of the corner of my eye. She was staring straight ahead, biting her lip, and had the saddest expression on her face.

"Bella? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business – I was just curious."

"No," she said softly, turning her head to look at me with a small smile. "It's okay. We just…grew apart, as people do, I guess. We were never involved or anything, not really. We wanted different things." She looked out the front windshield again. "He married a couple of years ago, has a couple of kids. He's doing quite well, from what my dad says. I haven't seen him in ages."

That "not really" bothered me, but it truly was none of my business. I frowned down at my cold, white fingers wrapped around the steering wheel.

"So," she said with a raised brow, in a determinedly cheerful tone. "Any chance you'd let me drive this beautiful creature?" She stroked the dash, and I had to shift in my seat. I had never responded to any woman this way, human or not.

I took firm rein on my wayward emotions. "Are you hinting you'd like to see me again? Or is it just the car?"

She blushed deeply – dammit! –biting her lip, turning her head so her hair curled over her cheek. "Well, the car is a very – very – nice incentive, but…yeah. I wouldn't mind seeing more of you. I mean, seeing you again! That is – gah!" She broke off with a self-conscious chuckle and stared out her window.

Slowly, swallowing thickly, I reached over and gave her bare knee a very brief pat. "I wouldn't mind it, either. We'll have to see what we can arrange."

She was quiet again, and after a moment I could smell her blush, feel the heat of it radiate across the small cabin of the vehicle to pound against me. "Edward, can I ask you a question?"

"Yes?" I hated that it came out with a wary edge.

Her fingers stroked the smooth material of the clutch bag resting on her lap. "Do you feel it, too?" Her voice was low. She wouldn't meet my eyes.

I was silent, debating. I knew exactly what she was asking. This entire situation had careened so far off course, so far away from a job, that my quite-beyond-capable head could barely keep up. Confusion and uncertainty were foreign to my being, but I was inundated and swamped by those emotions. And – God – desire. Always desire, for her and for her blood.

I was so tired of lying. The weight of all the lies I wove and lived by weighed heavy on my shoulders tonight. The nature of what I was demanded prevarication to protect our secret. The abomination of what I was gave no other option than to lie to my family, those I loved, and those who were friends and acquaintances. I bore it always; there was no other choice. But…what if there _was_ another option? What if this was my chance to…well…live? What if Bella was the one creature whose thoughts I could not violate, with whom I could relax and be myself – if I even knew who I was anymore.

"Yes," I said simply, against my better judgment. "I feel it." My shoulders lifted, and the restricting tension in my chest eased. I had not known it was there until this moment – until it was gone.

Her breath expelled from her lungs in a quiet whoosh and her shoulders slumped in relief. Yes, I felt it, the electrical connection and the immense attraction between us. I didn't know yet what it meant, for her, for us, for the future, but yes. I certainly felt it.

All I knew was that I craved it. I did not want to go on existing without it. And it could never, ever work.

We spent the evening together in our own little world. I mingled as briefly and efficiently as I could manage, giving cursory support for our Volturi, Inc. cover. I'd spent over a century waiting for her, and I didn't want to waste another moment. None of the human business associates thought much of my anti-social behavior – it was par for the course with me. They saw me as a strange, cold-hearted bastard, and they were absolutely correct. Bella thoroughly enjoyed the exhibits, though, and we spent most of our time wandering slowly through them, talking about artists and pieces we took particular pleasure in, discussing and arguing good-naturedly about those we didn't.

I had never enjoyed an evening or someone else's company more.

I limited myself strictly to brief and fleeting touches, brushes really, all night. All I wanted to do was grab her and run. It really didn't help my control that she was constantly gazing at me out of the corner of her sparkling eyes – I didn't think she'd object if I did grab her and have my way with her, whatever way that might be. She would smile and laugh at comments I made, placing her hand on my chest briefly or touching my forearm through my sleeve. Even through the layers of cloth I could feel the hot spark of her contact, and by her accelerated heartbeat and pink cheeks I knew she was aware of the connection as well.

We danced around each other all night, advance and retreat, sidestep and follow. There was no thought of my job or getting information from her – I had already given up on that, and was thinking only of the here and now. I knew there could be no way this would end well. The Volturi were particularly persistent and would never leave her alone, and my hunger for her blood was unrelenting, only barely leashed. My thoughts had moved on to how I could protect her, from both the Volturi and myself.

The evening flew by, and it was late when I retrieved her wrap. We waited in charged silence for the valet to bring the Aston Martin around. I helped her into the vehicle and tipped the young man that held my keys. I paused briefly, taking a deep gulp of air, and nodded to Jacob standing in the shadows before I lowered myself into the car to drive her home.

She was unusually silent on the way back to her flat. I had grown accustomed to her sharing the thoughts of her vibrant mind in the short time we had been together. She gazed out the window with a thoughtful twist to her lips, and I found myself glancing at her with increasing frequency as my anxiety grew. What the hell was she thinking?

She remained silent as I pulled up in front of her building, shutting the car off and turning to look at her. She gave me a brief, impersonal smile, and began to get out of the car. It took more willpower than I thought I had to move at a barely human speed out and around to her door, opening it for her and extending a hand unconsciously to help her out.

Her hot little palm nestled in my cold hand, and I started in surprise. Her fingers simply tightened briefly on mine before she released me to walk into the lobby of her building. I followed, scowling at myself for the slip of touching her skin, thrusting my fists deep into the pockets of my black trousers. She nodded to the man at the desk, and I tossed him my keys and a rather large bill as I passed.

"Thank you!" he enthused. "I'll watch over her like she was my own."

I arched a brow at him, and he stuttered and blushed. I heard Bella snicker as she waited for the creaky old elevator. I tried to quiet my large inhale of air as I followed her into the small, claustrophobic space, but she peered up at me in brief curiosity as the contraption began to rise. I stared at her blatantly, trying to figure out her mercurial moods, but she simply blushed and averted her eyes.

I found myself once again following her, feeling as though I was stalking her, as she stepped out of the elevator and walked to her door. She paused once there, head bent, fingers clutching her beaded bag, and I heard her take a deep breath. I started to ask her what was wrong, to assure her I would leave once I saw her safely inside, apologize, beg…anything. But she whirled around, the wave of mouth-watering scent blowing across me, almost sending me to my knees. I clenched my jaw and wondered if the impact would ever lessen.

I knew it would not.

"Edward," she blurted, staring at my shoes before mustering the courage to look into my predatory eyes. "I've never done this before. Ever. Any of it. But…would you like to come in?"

I stared at her in confusion. I could not fathom why this was so upsetting to her.

"You know," she continued, fidgeting, and her blush deepened along with my burn. "For a drink, or coffee, or…"

"Oh." She wanted to spend more time with me. I was either the luckiest or unluckiest bastard on earth. I couldn't decide. "Um, Bella, I don't think that is such a good idea." _If she only knew._

"Oh." She repeated my utterance, glaring down at her feet. "I see. Well, okay."

She spun and grabbed the doorknob, obviously forgetting that she had yet to unlock the door. She struggled with it for a few seconds before slamming her fist against the wood in frustration, and her shoulder sagged in defeat. I burned, but for an altogether different reason this time. I had hurt her feelings.

"Bella," I began softly, reaching out and allowing my fingertips to brush against her hair where it danced across the top of her shoulders. "I want to. I really want to. But it really wouldn't be…smart… right now."

She was still for a few more seconds and then turned to face me, biting her lip uncertainly. Her shimmering brown eyes searched mine, and I felt that strange, awful burn again, so different than the one I felt at the scent of her blood. I'd put her on the verge of tears.

"Really?" she asked hesitantly, and I nodded, digging my fists deep into my pockets to keep from reaching and grabbing. Stroking and taking.

She threw herself at me, and I grunted with the contact, not because of the physical impact of our bodies, or even of her scent. It was suddenly, frighteningly, purely emotional, and I was bone scared. I squeezed my eyes shut and told myself I could still handle this. Slowly, my hands emerged from my pockets, and my arms went carefully, loosely around her. She sighed, snuggling into the rock hard planes of my chest. The power of her essence was indescribable.

"I want to see you again." I whispered. I did, badly. My mind, focused and intent for so many decades, was reeling, all because of this insignificant wisp of a human girl. Insignificant? Hah. She had, in one hair-raising fragrance, become the focus of my world. "Tomorrow. May I?"

She pulled back briefly to nod enthusiastically, and then frowned. "I have classes."

"I'll meet you afterward, at our café. What time?"

She told me, and then pressed herself to me once again. I lifted my head and strained my face as far away from her as I could while still maintaining my precarious hold on both her and my resolve. I heard a sniffle, and felt the warm, wet brush of her face against my chest.

"Bella?" I questioned.

She sniffled again and tucked her head the side. "I'm sorry, I'm being stupid. I- it's just…" her trembling voice trailed off and then came again, stronger, but still soft. "Every time you leave, I feel like I'll never see you again. This just all feels so unreal. Kind of like a fairy tale," she added, very softly. "I'm afraid you're going to go '_poof'_ if I let you out of my sight, like yesterday at the cafe. And I don't know what I'd do after waiting for you for so very long." She brought a hand up to rub at her cheeks. "I'm sorry, I know that's not fair, but I just can't help it."

"I'll be here tomorrow," I murmured, forgetting my discomfort, forgetting what I was, who she was, and the circumstances that brought us together. I'd found her, and I wasn't ready to let her go.


	8. Chapter 7: Soaring Up So High

**SMeyer owns Twilight goodies, me own Tangled Web goodies**

**betas silentnc and cyber-sair, what can I say besides - thank you!**

**Special thanks to u2shay for the shout out in her story - that's just...so cool.**

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**CHAPTER SEVEN: Soaring Up So High**

I met her that next day and every day after that. I spent every moment I could with her, walking, talking, and enjoying all of the sights, sounds, and culture Paris had to offer. I took her to an intimate jazz club I had discovered years ago and had never shared with another being, living or undead. Jacob and Demetri were confused and furious at my behavior.

One week dragged into two and more. I continued to see Bella every day, trying desperately to capture every moment I could with the intriguing girl before my extraordinary luck ran out. I was consumed by her and not just her scent. I had given in to the pull she had for me, gravitating around her life force; it called to me on every primal level. I was enthralled, helpless, and had to be near her. I'd never experienced the like in all my many, many years of existence. It was maddening.

I still could read nothing of her thoughts.

She did mention Phil on a couple of occasions, but only in passing, and never with any indication that she had seen him as anything other than her mother's boyfriend, a companion, a human.

Demetri and Jacob finally cornered me early one morning. I was sitting in a chair, putting my shoes on, when Jacob came up behind me. He set his hands on my shoulders and Demetri caged me in front, leaning over me and bracing his hands on the seat back. I tamped the sudden furious surge of temper and the unholy urge to fight when cornered, managing only to raise an eyebrow in bored inquiry.

"Cut the shit, Edward," Demetri said bluntly. "What the fuck is going on?"

I started to rise and felt Jacob tighten his grip on my shoulders. I froze.

"If you don't want to lose your hands," I said mildly, "you might want to back the hell off." His hands lifted, but settled next to Demetri's on the seatback on either side of my head. I forced myself to relax back in the chair and feign calmness. "What are you talking about?"

"Cut the shit," Demetri repeated angrily. "You've been with the human every single day now for weeks. We've been quiet, we've been patient, and we've been worrying our asses off! Do you know how many times Aro has contacted us? How many times he's tried to contact you?"

"How many times we've covered for your ass?" Jacob took over. "How many times we've danced around the truth and put him off? He's pissed, and that is not going to bode well for any of us when we get back. If you haven't gotten anything from her by now, Edward, I really don't think you're going to."

I struggled with my righteous anger, but had to give it up for a bad cause. They were right. I'd blown the assignment, put us all in trouble's way, and for what? My personal _feelings_? They had every right to be furious with me. They had every right to report my strange and suspicious behavior to Aro and let him deal with me. The fact that they had been covering for me so well and for so long made me realize the depth of their concern, and how much they valued our friendship – especially with so little understanding of my unusual behavior. How could they understand, when I didn't myself?

I rose abruptly, and they stood back, allowing me to pace to the window. I narrowed my eyes as I looked out onto the rainy Paris street below.

"I need more time," I murmured. "I know I have no right to ask, but I am. Let me figure out what I need to do." They thought I was talking about the assignment; I knew I was not.

They looked at each other, and I stifled my sigh of relief. I could hear their minds before Demetri gave me the words.

"We can give you a little more time, Edward, but get your shit together. We can't wait very much longer. Aro is already pissed." He gave me a meaningful look. "If you can't read her, you can't read her. There's no shame in that. We need to tell Aro that you haven't been able to find out what she knows about Phillip. Let the Volturi decide what they want to do."

"I know," I said softly. There was no way I was going to let Aro or anyone from the Volturi decide what to do about Bella, but there was no way I could tell him that. "Thank you, Demetri."

I vaguely registered their thoughts and voices as they left the flat, shooting me concerned glances and leaving me to my brooding. I was mildly ashamed at the depth of their apprehension – they were truly worried about what was happening to me, and I had been ignoring them, treating them like part of the problem. I sighed and found myself rubbing the bridge of my nose. I needed to face the dilemma that I had been avoiding for so many days. What was I going to do about Isabella Swan?

I was out of time – I couldn't put it off any longer. I needed some clarification for my questions, but there were too few sources I could rely upon. Aro was out of the question; I wanted him to know as little about this situation as possible. That really only left me one other source of knowledge that I trusted.

Carlisle.

I picked up my cell phone and dialed it quickly, before doubts could set in. It rang twice, and I heard his familiar voice in my ear.

"Edward?" Pleasure and surprise rang in his tone.

"Hello, Carlisle. Caller ID?"

He chuckled softly. "That, and Alice." I hadn't thought about Alice's likely precognition of the call. "It's good to hear from you."

I could hear the sincerity in his tone. My ability was only faintly engaged due to the physical distance between us, but I could pick up his honest pleasure that I had called. My guilt, the complex lash of emotions that consumed me when I thought of Carlisle – who was my family, my father – washed over me.

"You, too," I said sincerely. "How is everyone?"

We spent a few minutes getting caught up on the various happenings with my family. I gave him a brief update on my activities, and finally the question came.

"Where are you now, Edward? Working on another assignment?"

"I am, yes. I'm in Paris, as a matter of fact. Carlisle, I need your help."

"Anything," he said without hesitation.

"I need information, if you have it."

"Of course." I knew he could sense my reluctance to broach the subject. I was silent, and he gently prompted, "Does it have something to do with your current assignment, or is this personal?"

"Yes." I chuckled shortly. "Carlisle, what do you know about _la tua cantante_? Singers?"

He said nothing for a moment, but I heard the soft, sudden intake of his breath. "Did you find your…singer, Edward?"

It was difficult to tell him, for some reason. "Yes."

I heard the loud exhalation. "Well," he began slowly, and I could see the furrow of his brow in my mind – I needed no special talent to visualize that clearly. "I don't know very much – and what I do know is most likely conjecture or legends passed along over the years – but I will tell you what I have heard.

"Singers are thought to be a lost soul mate, your soul mate if you had not been…changed, if you had remained human." I started at the word. There was that mate issue again. Was it possible? How could it be possible? It was absolutely possible, because there was no way I could deny it after the past couple of weeks. Bella had changed my entire world – my entire being. I realized the transformation was undeniable and irrevocable.

Carlisle continued with his thought, unaware of my distress. "If you met your singer while you were human, you would recognize an unexplainable draw, an immediate and irreversible attraction. Love at first sight. Humans put it off to hormones, or pheromones, or a chemical reaction – I don't believe they are very far off in that assumption. As a vampire, this intense connection comes to our superior senses as a compulsion for their blood. Humans find it easy to satisfy their physical desires, their hunger, and it is not a constant, driving urge as it is with us. Sexual desire is a human's strongest draw. Ours is feeding."

"So we eat our soul mates due to our nature." I couldn't help the bitterness that leaked into my voice.

"Hm. I don't know about that, exactly. Vampires and humans are not compatible that way." My body tightened in pain at his unknowing statement, as if I had been shot. "I think that is simply the universe's way to be sure it is not an issue. There are those that feel that we do our singer a service by taking their life -"

"A service!" I hissed, the bitterness now in full evidence.

His voice was gentle. "They would live their human life unsatisfied, unable to connect with the other part of themselves. It is a sad and unfulfilled existence, and these poor lost souls keep returning to this earth, always searching for their other half, unable to find it. And if they do…"

We were both quiet. I squeezed my eyes shut and pinched the bridge of my nose. "Edward?" he whispered.

"Can it be done, Carlisle? Can a human and a vampire have a life – a relationship together? A vampire and his singer? "

"I don't think I understand," he said slowly. I could sense his confusion.

I hit the wall in front of me, crumbling the plaster. "Can I be with her, without hurting her? Without…killing her?"

"She's still alive?" His voice rose in shock.

"Of course," I snapped. "What did you think?"

I heard reluctant laughter and took the phone away from my ear to stare at it in astonishment.

"I thought she would be dead less than half of a second after you scented her," he admitted. "I've never heard of a vampire who was able to resist the call of their singer's blood."

"Well, you are talking to one right now. Make a note of it." Anger and frustration boiled inside me.

"How long has it been, since you first…smelled her?"

"A couple of weeks."

"A couple of weeks! Hmm. That is amazing. Have you encountered her since then?" he asked.

"I'm with her every day," I admitted. "I can't stay away."

"Every day! And you don't want to, well…um…"

"Every second," I said forcefully. "But, Carlisle, there's something else, too. I don't _want_ to hurt her. I certainly don't want to kill her. I feel something other than a desire for her blood. It makes the other…bearable."

"Are you in love with her, Edward?"

_Was I?_ I had no idea. I did know that my existence up until I met her was one long, continual grey state of loneliness and sameness. Since she had crashed into my world, I found myself eager for the next moment instead of dreading it. I had hope, I felt desire and excitement. I would give my very being to make her happy and keep her safe. There was no sacrifice I wouldn't make for her.

"I – I must be," I whispered into the phone, dazed. "What do I do?"

Carlisle chuckled again softly. "Son, you are the best and brightest among us. You have the most control and compassion of anyone I've ever known. You'll do what's right."

I was stunned. "That's you, Carlisle, that's not me."

"I just have more practice. It's you, Edward, it always has been. You just have to realize it for yourself."

"I'm scared, Carlisle," I admitted in a voice so soft even he could barely hear, and that was the entire point of the call right there. "I don't know what's right anymore. I'm scared I'm going to hurt her, to do something I will never forgive myself for. I couldn't bear it if I hurt her."

"You can handle this, Edward. I think you are the only being who could. You just have to remember not to let your overanalyzing head overrule your heart. You alone have the ability to reclaim both your lost souls and bring them together."

"I don't deserve it. I don't deserve her." I meant more than that, of course. I certainly did not deserve his kindness or consideration, in light of what I'd done and where I had been for the last few decades. I didn't deserve what he'd given me, and what I'd thrown away.

"You deserve that and more." His voice was suddenly intense. "And when you truly realize that, Edward, you will know what to do."

Silence reigned again. I knew his words came from his heart and he believed them, but my world was so rocked I needed time to think. "Please tell Esme I called and that I love her. I just can't talk to her right now. Later, I promise."

"I'll tell her. She'll understand. Edward," he paused. "I love you. We all do. Please call if I can help."

"Thank you." My voice was shaky, and I meant it with every fiber of my being.


	9. Chapter 8: How Brilliant Are Your Eyes

**As always, Stephenie Meyer is owner and reaper of all benefits Twilight. **

**silentnc and Sarahsumbrella - betas extraordinary - thanks for the comments, suggestions and encouragement.**

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**CHAPTER EIGHT: How Brilliant Are Your Eyes**

I spent most of the afternoon thinking – which wasn't unusual for me – not only about what Carlisle had said, but also Bella's impact on me since the first instant I saw her in the café on that fateful day. I thought about the future, something I typically avoided at all costs, and what I wanted. I thought about what I could realistically expect.

And that depressed me so much that I resolved to stop thinking for once. I decided to indulge in her presence and let my decisions come as they may. It was a stunning departure from my usual method of operation, but I literally had no idea what else to do. The compulsion to have her near was just simply too much to deny in my confused and disheartened state. I walked, my melancholy thoughts following me, to where I knew her final class of the day was held. I waited, standing like a crazy vampire stalker in the rain.

My spirits lifted and my doubts were washed away when her face lit up upon seeing me waiting for her. She moved swiftly through the rush of students to stand before me with a shy but happy smile.

"Hi," she said, and then frowned. She reached up to brush my dripping hair. "Why are you standing in the rain?"

I had to touch her. I settled the hood of the rain jacket closer around her face and let my fingers trail over her shoulder and down her arm over her wet jacket.

"I wanted to see you," I admitted softly. I saw the bright, happy smile return to her face before she ducked her head.

"Oh."

"Is that weird?" I asked worriedly. She shook her head and lifted her face, biting her lip. "I thought maybe you'd like to come over to my flat. You know…hang out…" I finished lamely and shook my head with a frustrated laugh. "God, I sound like an idiot."

"No. I'd like that," she said, taking my arm.

"Are you hungry? We could stop and get something to eat, if you'd prefer," I told her as we walked down the street.

"Do you have coffee at your place?"

"Yes." I'd seen Jacob drinking the beverage just the other morning. I was sure I could figure out how to work the coffee pot – I had a couple of engineering degrees, after all.

"I'd love to hang at your place," she assured me. "At least it's warm and cozy." She shivered. "It's a crappy day."

I hesitantly slid my arm around her shoulders, and she leaned into my side as I hailed a cab to take us to my flat.

**X-X-X-X-X**

It was a surprisingly comfortable silence in the apartment as Bella sat curled up on the sofa, reading. I sat at the desk just behind her with innocuous business documents from Volturi, Inc. spread out on the surface. It was quite peaceably domestic, just another couple enjoying a rainy afternoon together. My mouth twisted wryly. This was as far from a typical human situation as I could imagine, what with one of us not being human at all.

Every once in a while I could hear her turn her head and feel her eyes on me, but when I would lift my head to check on her, she would quickly move her attention back to her book. I realized I had not heard her turn a page in quite some time. It was still bewildering to me that I couldn't hear her thoughts, and I wondered what her clever mind was contemplating. It certainly wasn't Jane Austen.

I felt her eyes on me yet again. I met her gaze with a raised brow, smiling faintly as a blush covered her cheeks. Her charming blushes never failed to cause a rush of desire to ripple through me. She didn't look away this time, so I turned in my chair to face her.

"Can I ask you a question, Edward?" she asked softly, a slight frown crossing her features when she realized she had my full attention.

"Of course," I allowed. The damnable curiosity I so often felt in her presence back in full force.

"I was wondering…that is…do you…do you wear contacts?" She was looking at me intently, but I could not prevent the startled recoil of my body.

"Contacts?" I repeated slowly, leaning back in my chair while my mind tried to fathom what she could possibly be thinking. "Why?"

She rose up on her knees, putting her book down and resting her arms on the back of the sofa to peer at me. "Well, your eyes. I can tell that's not your natural color. It's too…different. Kind of fake. Pretty, though. But you just don't seem like the type," she added thoughtfully, her gaze never leaving mine.

"The type?" I was reduced to dumbly repeating her words. Dangerous creature.

"I just don't see you as being vain enough to want to improve your eye color." Her eyes moved to my hair, and I absently ran my hand through it. She smiled. "I mean, if you were that concerned about your appearance, you'd do something about that, first." She nodded meaningfully at the crazy, colorful mess on my head.

"Bella…" I had no idea what to say.

"Edward," she teased, imitating my tone and getting up to walk around the sofa. She approached me slowly and sank down on the floor next to where I sat in my chair, on her knees, resting back on her heels. I held my breath. The yearning that the scent of her blood caused was not the only desire coursing through me at her position. She was so close, so warm, and smelled so _good_. She hesitantly reached out and touched the back of my hand. I turned it in her loose grip against my better judgment, and she squeezed gently. A strangely satisfied look crossed her face.

"Edward, do you trust me?" she asked softly, her eyes going from our clasped hands to my face.

"Um, I think so?" It came out very unsure, as she had me reeling. No creature, human or otherwise, had ever made me feel this way. I felt like I had just been shoved head first down the rabbit hole. She could do that to me with a look. It was terrifying.

"If I asked you something, would you tell me the truth? No matter what?"

"I don't know," I answered honestly. I still had enough wits about me to not put myself into a position that might endanger us both.

Her fingers stroked my hand, and her gaze left mine to focus somewhere around the center of my chest. I stupidly looked down to make sure I was completely dressed, or at least that I had remembered to button up my shirt properly.

"Edward." Her voice was barely above a whisper. "What color are your eyes?"

I stiffened sharply and sucked in air, snapped utterly and completely out of my stupor. Her hand tightened on mine as I fought my shock and my mind tried to rationalize her question. It had to be simple curiosity about my physical attributes. I was overreacting. There was absolutely no way she could possibly –

"Are they gold, Edward?" Her voice was even softer, and she still stared determinedly at my chest. "Or are they…red?" The last word was barely a breath, but it had the effect of a nuclear bomb.

I was on my feet and on the other side of the sofa before I had realized I meant to move. I had knocked her back with the suddenness and violence of my action. I was so disconcerted that I couldn't move any closer to her, or even open my mouth to ask if I had hurt her. She was on her back on the thick carpet, her knees up in front of her and her arms braced behind her, staring at me with no surprise or shock on her face.

How was this possible? My entire being was absolutely still in astonishment.

"What are you talking about, Bella?" I finally asked in a menacing tone, still not able to look directly at her, or move anywhere near her. My primitive instincts were very close to the surface after her horrifying query. Fight or flight – no choice there, I was definitely programmed to fight. And win.

At her silence I risked a glance, and saw her staring at me intently from her position on the floor, one eyebrow arched. "It's a simple question," she said, sounding as calm as if we were discussing the weather. "Gold or red?"

I flashed to her, suddenly appearing before her, kneeling, my face only inches from hers. I dared not take a breath. Other than moving her head slightly back so she could keep eye contact, she barely flinched. It infuriated me. "How do you know to ask such a question?" I hissed.

She stared into my eyes, searching, and her hand came up slowly, so slowly, to touch my face. We both gasped when she made contact, and she laid the flat of her palm against my cheek. "Your mannerisms. You never eat or drink in front of me. You're very fast – your movements are so graceful and fluid." Her cheeks tinted red, but she didn't look away. "Your skin is so hard and smooth. Cold," she said quietly. She closed her eyes, leaning in the slightest bit toward me and inhaling deeply. "Your smell." Her eyes opened, a little less focused on mine. She smiled shakily, showing the first sign of uncertainty, and for some reason it calmed me instantly.

"What about them, Bella," I growled softly, but it wasn't really a question. She simply looked at me.

"They remind me." She swallowed, and I could see the question and pleading in her gaze. For what, I had no idea. "They remind me of…Phil. Edward, Phil was a vampire, too."

I collapsed back to sit on the floor with a whoosh of air. For the first time in my memory, I had no strength in my legs. This was bad. This was really bad. This was cataclysmically bad. I put my elbows on my knees and buried my hands in my hair. I had absolutely no fucking idea what to do.

I could not pretend I didn't know exactly who she was talking about – or what. I couldn't ignore the fact that she had just signed her own death warrant, and I was the executioner.


	10. Chapter 9: That Cannot Be

**SMeyer owns all of the Twilight universe, me just this little tiny speck of light.**

**As always, much love to Sarahsumbrella and silentnc for beta-ing and encouragement and just being awesome.**

**Fasten your seatbelts and return your seats to their upright and locked positions (too much Fight Club, I know, I know)**

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**CHAPTER NINE: That Cannot Be**

I dimly heard her sliding across the carpet toward me before I felt her small, warm hand come to rest on my shoulder. "It's okay, Edward," she said quietly, and I let out a humorless chuckle. "No, really. It's okay. I know. I understand. Phil was with us a long time. He explained who he was – what he was. And he was one of the best men I have ever known. You remind me of him, so much."

I raised my head to look at her, and her expression was startled when she saw my face. "You don't understand," I rasped, shaking my head.

Her large brown eyes shone with compassion and sincerity, neither of which I deserved. "I do, Edward, I really do. I'm not afraid of you. I trust you."

"Don't," I moaned.

"You won't hurt me." There was nothing but conviction in her voice and expression. "If you wanted to, you would have done it a long time ago. But with the contacts? I can't tell if you're hungry or not. Or…what you eat."

I studied her incredulously. "What do you mean, what I eat? What do you think I eat?" Suddenly, I fully comprehended the ramifications of the question about my eye color. It was bad enough that she realized what I was, that she had knowledge of the existence of my species at all, but it was impossible for her to know that vampires could have any eye color other than red. I rose to my feet, towering over her. "Bella, why did you ask me if my eyes were _gold_?"

She was silent, her face expressionless for once, and my hands clenched into fists. She took a deep breath and nodded her head as if I had admitted something. "They're red, aren't they? I thought…maybe they were. You have a different edge to you, more intensity. I wondered if it was just you personally, or…"

"Bella," I said warningly, rage and fear shivering through me. I concentrated on shoring up my control. I could not afford to let it slip right now.

She scrambled to her feet as well. It only put her up to the center of my chest, but she still didn't move away from me. I could feel the burn in my throat get stronger. "Phil had gold eyes."

I stumbled backward in utter shock. How was that possible? The members of my immediate family were the only vampires who had gold eyes, and our close friends and extended family living in the Denali wilderness in Alaska. Only eleven of them total in our existence. Their eyes were gold from drinking animal blood, not human. All other vampires existed on human blood and had red eyes, like mine. I was absolutely still as I processed this information.

"How?" I whispered to myself.

"He didn't drink from…humans," she replied, watching me anxiously, as if my shocked utterance was not rhetorical. "He only drank animal blood. He didn't want to be -"

"A monster. A murderer," I said bitterly.

She was quiet for a moment and then laid her hand on my chest. I quivered. "I was going to say conspicuous," she said, and placed her fingers on my chin to turn my face toward her. "I know it sounds crazy, Edward, but I swear it's true. Surely, you must have heard of the possibility…"

I started laughing, and she finally stepped back. "Edward, please listen. I'm trying to explain to you -"

"Explain what, exactly?" I broke in harshly. "That Phil is a vegetarian?" Her eyes widened at the private joke my family had for their unusual feeding habits. "I know, Bella. I know, because I used to be one myself. I lived with my family, my father and mother, my sisters and brothers, all of whom deny their true natures and feed off the blood of animals!"

She stared at me, wide-eyed. "Tanya?" she breathed. "Kate? Irina?"

I spun around, running my hand through my hair and tugging. Well, that was one question answered, where Phil had developed his vegetarian habits. I had really started to fear for my sanity. "No," I told her. "That's my extended family in Alaska." I turned back to her and met her wide brown eyes. "My father is Carlisle Cullen."

"Carlisle," she repeated, her eyes getting a faraway look as she thought, and then flew back to mine. "And…Esme! And…you're Edward…Cullen." Comprehension dawned in her eyes as she made some connection. "Phil mentioned your family."

This admission did not make me feel better. In fact, it only demonstrated the scope of the problem at hand. She knew far more about us, about vampires and our society, than could be allowed. There were only two options for her, both spelling certain death. I gritted my teeth in anguish.

She stepped toward me, and I stiffened. "So," she said softly. "Do you eat animals? Or…people?"

I spun around, facing away from her and wanting to hit something. Hard. I struggled internally with my emotions, with desire and intellect. Finally, I reached up and removed my contacts. I took a deep breath, using the scorch in my throat from her delectable scent to remind me of what I was. I straightened my shoulders and spine to my full height, and turned to her too quickly to be considered human. I glared at her, tilting my head so the light hit me full in my blood-red irises.

I smiled humorlessly when she gasped in shock, staring at me wordlessly, her trembling hand pressing to her mouth. I steeled my resolve. "This is what I am, Bella. I stopped consuming animal blood years ago. I am a murderer. I drink human blood."

A kind of despairing gladness spread through me as her eyes filled with tears. I'd done it. I'd told her the truth and admitted my true nature. She would be horrified, and would be running and screaming as soon as she got over the initial shock. It meant I'd have to send Felix after her as soon as possible. My base, monstrous nature roared in satisfaction, while the last withering scrap of humanity in me raged in despair and denial. I was, however, relieved not to be hiding from her anymore. The other shoe had finally dropped, as I had been expecting it to all along.

A soft sob tore from her throat, and I closed my eyes briefly in agony at the sign of her distress. I opened them again quickly, however, wanting her to fully realize what I was by the condemning hue of my eyes. Her fingers were white where she was pressing them hard against her lips. She was shaking.

"I'm sorry," she choked out.

"I am, too," I said, and I had never meant anything more. I was sorry I wasn't what she needed me to be. I was sorry I was a monster. I was sorry I wanted to kill her as much as I wanted to share my body with her, although the former was much more likely to happen.

"I'm sorry; it must be very difficult for you to be around me," she continued as if I hadn't spoken, and I found myself staring at her once again in astonishment. "Phil said it was easier for him. He was used to denying his instinct for human blood, and found it much easier to be around us. Humans, that is." Her voice got quiet. "Is it really very hard for you?"

A sharp, loud bark of laughter escaped me, and she flinched slightly. "Hard? Bella, you have no idea. None at all," I emphasized, and she stared at me in question. I pinched the bridge of my nose and closed my eyes briefly. Frustration didn't even begin to cover what I was feeling. "I can interact with humans all day, every day, all the time. I'm used to it. It only causes me mild discomfort when I concentrate. I can separate every day interaction from feeding." Her eyes tightened almost imperceptibly at that, but I saw it. "Yes, I feed on humans. To be fair, it's easier for me to separate those who are deviants and evil and slake my thirst only on them, but still. It's you, Bella. You, your blood, your scent. It drives me mad. I've never smelled anything like it in my entire existence. I've never wanted another human's blood as badly as I want yours. And I hate myself for it."

"Why?" her voice was barely a whisper as she looked at me with stricken, confused eyes.

I tugged on my hair, pacing. "Your blood calls to me, it sings to me. It is everything I can do, all the time, not to take you. And it's not only your blood now. It's you." I stopped and looked directly into her eyes. It was time to be honest, with her and with myself, and let things fall as they may. "It's your body, too. I want you, Bella. I want your blood and I want your body. I can't separate the two anymore. I don't know how long I can continue to control myself – I don't know if I can at all. And I could not live with myself if I ever hurt you. It's driving me _insane_!"

She stood before me, wide-eyed and silent. I forced myself into stillness, letting her process my wild confessions. Her mouth opened a couple of times, but shut without saying anything. I saw her finally take a deep breath as she rubbed her forehead with her hand.

"So, let me see…" her voice trailed off, but picked back up with conviction. "You're a…vampire, like Phil. It's very difficult for you to be around me. You want me, physically, sexually." She put a hand up when I would have interrupted. "You also want my blood, to drink it. Which would kill me, but you don't want to do that. Kill me, that is." I shook my head miserably. "So this is just…well, there are no words, are there?"

I just shook my head again. She was right. There were no words for this situation. We stared at each other wretchedly, and then she did something astounding. She moved to me and placed her hand on my chest. I stared at her, shocked, and she quirked her mouth into an uncertain smile.

"Is this okay?" she asked softly, and I jerked my head in a nod. I slowly reached up and placed the palm of my hand on the side of her throat, utilizing every ounce of control I had left, returning the trust implicit in her gesture. I shut my eyes briefly as I felt her heat and the throbbing beat of her pulse, the lure of her blood, but Imet her eyes again with determination. After a moment I lowered my forehead to hers, letting her scent stir me, soothe me, confuse me.

"Why?" she asked calmly after a few moments. "Why me? Why is my scent so particularly disturbing to you?" Her hand fisted in my shirt and then let go to smooth the fabric, stroking unconsciously over the hard muscles of my chest.

I took a deep breath, savoring the torture of her fragrance so very close, and leaned back. "Let's sit, shall we?" I invited, taking her hand, tugging her gently toward the sofa. She moved her discarded novel to the coffee table once we reached the cushions and we sat, not quite touching. I didn't release her hand, strangely satisfied to be able to touch her without worrying about her reaction to my abnormally cool skin.

I wondered where to begin. She tucked her legs up underneath her and waited patiently.

"So," I started. "You said Phil mentioned Carlisle…" I went on to tell her who Carlisle was to me and detail the conversation he and I had about singers and soul mates, pausing frequently to gauge her reaction. She nodded or squeezed my fingers encouragingly every time, not interrupting once throughout my long narrative. I sat nervously after finishing my tale, realizing what a rare and truly amazing listener my Bella was. I wondered if she thought I was crazy, telling her we were predestined soul mates when I had no idea how she felt toward me, especially after all of the absolutely insane revelations of this afternoon.

She was worrying her lower lip between her teeth as she searched my features. She eased closer to me, her hands reaching slowly toward my waist with a questioning look on her face.

"Is this okay?" she asked again softly. I hesitated, checking the limits of my restraint, and nodded. I wasn't entirely confident, but I couldn't deny her the comfort and reassurance she was seeking. I was amazed she was still here with me at all. Her warm arms gently came around my waist, and she placed her head on the hard planes of my chest. I carefully circled her shoulders with my own arms, breathing warily and evenly. With all of the emotions raging in the room this afternoon, my vaunted control was on a knife's edge.

"Bella?" I questioned, cautiously resting my cheek on her head. The aroma from her hair and skin was absolutely delicious. I was still waiting for her to run screaming from the apartment.

"Mmm, you smell so good, Edward." I was surprised at her words. They were not what I was expecting from her, and too close to my own thoughts. I smiled into her hair.

"Aren't you going to say anything?" I finally asked as she continued to snuggle against me in silence. I – unfortunately – couldn't imagine what was going through her mind.

"Hmm," she replied thoughtfully. "Soul mates. I…well, I rather like the idea."

"You do?" I was astounded. I pulled slightly away to look at her expression. She was blushing, but met my gaze directly.

"I told you I always felt I didn't belong anywhere. I always felt I was searching for something. I knew there was something – some_one_ – out there I was waiting for, waiting to find them, or waiting for them to find me. Edward, I've been waiting for you my entire life."

She'd managed to shock me yet again. I'd had stronger emotions the past couple of weeks than I had my entire existence, and it was all due to the fragile little human I held in my arms. I sat up, running my hands through my hair. She smiled, reaching out to push back a strand that had fallen over my forehead. I couldn't help recoiling slightly from her warm fingers. I simply wasn't used to being touched by a human.

"Your hair's a mess," she said, and I scrubbed at it in confusion. "I'm sorry if I'm making you uncomfortable." She laughed lightly. "I guess I am, both physically and mentally, huh?"

"Yes," I admitted softly, but smiled.

"It's just…I've waited for you for _so long_. It seems like forever. And now that I've found you…" her voice trailed off and the blush on her cheeks intensified. I was disgusted that venom flooded my mouth, and the flame in my throat and chest blazed. There was an ache lower down, too, between my legs. "Um, the problem is I just can't believe that you might feel the same way, too."

"What?" I was shocked and surprised yet again. Hadn't she been listening? Didn't she care that I was a _vampire_?

Her face flushed a deeper shade of lovely blood-red, and I licked my lips. "Well, I mean look at you. And look at me. You're beautiful. And amazing. And…_wonderful_. I just can't believe that this is real. And yet, I'm afraid not to believe." She turned tear-filled brown eyes on me. "This is _crazy_. How in the world could you possibly feel the same way about me that I do about you? I mean, how could I possibly deserve this?"

I grimaced and stood up, leaving her on the sofa. I had just admitted to being a vampire, a murderous, monstrous creature, and she was worried about _deserving_ me? I began pacing in agitation, pushing my hands through my hair again, and felt my emotions run wild past the restraints I had imposed on them.

"This isn't what I want to be, Bella. This outer shell, the perfection that feeds your insecurities, I wasn't born this way. I didn't develop with this body or even this mind. They have nothing to do with how I was raised by my human parents, the foundation I built _me _upon during my human years. All these decades I've fought not to lose that last scrap of humanity. I tried, Bella, I tried so hard…for a while. And I lost. All that I've done since I was changed, that is what this shell represents. This is what I've become. All the darkness, the evil, inhuman things – that is what I am now. Not beautiful, not noble, not perfect. You don't think you deserve me?" I laughed harshly, without humor. "You are the only thing that is pure and good in my miserable world. You see, I've done nothing to deserve _you_, to be worthy of someone like you.

"Don't you see? This," I motioned down my body with my hands, "this is what I've become, not what I want to be. This is not me, this is simply circumstance. This is what happened to me, without my knowledge, or consent. This is what a murderer looks like, Bella. This is a monster. This is _hell_."

I turned away from her huge brown eyes in disgust, clenching my unclean hands into fists at my sides. Waves of fury, despair, and wretched desire washed though me. I fought them all with the very last of my control, and a growl rumbled from the depths of my chest as it shook and crumbled. My eyes blazed, and I couldn't stop baring my razor-sharp teeth as I turned back to her. The anxiety, and yes, the _fear_ she was suddenly feeling in my presence made her scent swirl and strengthen in the air.

Loathing joined the tangle of emotions inside me, for as much as I cared about her, I wanted nothing more at that precise moment than to slake my feral thirst for her blood. I wanted to dominate her, to wrench her head back by that long mahogany hair and plunge my teeth into her supple, white neck, to take her body as I took her life. I burned to let her essence fill my mouth and pour down my throat…I burned to pour myself into her.

Her. Always her.

I was shuddering and shaking now, battling the monster that rattled at its cage, roaring in unholy glee as my control crumbled.

"Edward…" I heard her get up off the sofa and move toward me.

"No! Bella, get out of here," I gritted out, my teeth grinding, every muscle in my body hard and tense. "Go – now!" If she touched me, we were lost. If she touched me, I would snap and shatter. If she touched me, there was nothing – nothing! - that would stop me from taking her life.

And that I could not bear.

My senses were hyper-aware at that moment, preparing to feed. I could smell the adrenaline coursing through her body as she watched my trembling form, and I knew the instant she started crying. The salt and moistness of her tears was indescribable in my nostrils, as was the dampness of her skin. I opened my mouth, trying not to breathe her scents though my nose. I tried to hold my breath, but I was so agitated that it panted in and out of my lungs.

"Edward -" she tried again, and I could hear the faint rustle of her clothes and slide of her skin as she raised an arm toward me.

"Bella, if you value your life – if you value my sanity – go! Please, run! _Now_!" My voice was booming, otherworldly, and tortured as my control slipped.

I heard her spin away and her feet clatter across the stone floor. She fumbled with the door before pulling it open and then slamming it behind her. I heard her banging down the stairs, bursting out into the courtyard, and darting down the street. I hoped she didn't hurt herself. I heard her sobbing as she ran from me.

It took everything in me not to respond to the primal call of the chase with my heightened senses and prey drive – to let the bloodlust overtake me, to hunt her, and take her down. To gorge on her blood. To kill her.

It broke me. I fell to my knees, not noticing the crack and fissuring of the stone tile floor. I hung my head in anguish and then threw it back to howl in shame, all the while battling my true and constant nature.


	11. Chapter 10: Dismal Den

**S. Meyer, not me.**

**Betas Sarahsumbrella and silentnc - thank you!**

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**CHAPTER TEN: Dismal Den**

"You rang?" Jacob's head poked through the door a few minutes later.

I was still on my knees on the floor, pulling unwanted and unneeded air through my teeth in a vain attempt to calm myself. It wasn't helping. "Not now, dog," I growled. He sauntered in, ignoring me, and I squeezed my eyes shut.

"I thought someone was killing a cow up here," he commented, walking around the room and pretending an interest in the decor. "I needed a snack, so thought I'd check."

"I said not now, Jacob." I couldn't quite grasp the ragged edges of my control. I concentrated harder.

"No blood," he said, and my eyes flew open. "No body. Guess you didn't suck her dry after all, huh?"

My head whipped around to glare at him. He was watching me with an all too innocent expression, hands in his pockets. Was he _teasing _me? I slowly came to my feet, and he gave a sharp nod of approval.

"That's better. Hate to see a bloodsucker on its knees."

"Do you have a death wish?" I gritted.

He shrugged, his dark eyes bright on my face. "As if."

My hands clenched convulsively at my sides, a fine tremor shivering through my body. I was still too close to the edge, the bloodlust still held sway over my base instincts. I wanted to fight – I wanted an outlet for the raging emotions coursing through me. I wanted to rip and shred, bathe in blood and fire, I wanted to rampage. I wanted to bury myself in the warm, wet heat of her. A feral snarl ripped up from my chest, and I knew my eyes were flat, black, and soulless.

"Get a grip, Edward. You're trippin', dude."

"Jacob," I seethed. "Shut up now, or I swear by all that's holy I'll -"

"I just don't get it," he broke in, paying no heed to my impotent fury. "What's the big deal? I mean, the Men In Black want her dead anyway, right? What difference does it make if it's you or Felix who chows down on her? Just let it go, man, and do it already. I want to get out of here. I'm dead bored. It's time to move on."

I spun and gripped the mantle in an effort to keep myself from ripping the pup's head off. Slowly, much too slowly, I could feel my iron will restoring my equilibrium and control.

"I mean," Jacob continued, oblivious to the life and death struggle going on in front of him, "it's not like you have feelings for the little human. _Feelings_," he sang. "_Whoa, ohh, ohh_…Whoa. Whoa!" He took a step toward me, his face blank, stunned. His mind was blank, as well, until his shock wore off and was replaced with incredulity. "Oh holy shit, Edward…Fuck! You do, don't you? You have feelings for her! Sweet weeping baby Jesus…that's fucked up."

I shut my eyes and hung my head between my arms. "I'm in love with her," I whispered, and a wave of calmness finally washed over me at the admission.

He was silent, and I eventually raised my head to turn and face him as his chaotic thoughts bombarded my consciousness. His mouth was hanging open, his eyes bugging out of his head. It might have been comical if the situation wasn't so desperate. He searched my face and his jaw snapped shut. His eyes narrowed on mine as confusion and anger settled in the forefront of his mind.

"You dumb emo bitch," he snarled, his voice increasing in volume with each slow step toward me. "What have you done, you stupid goddamn bloodsucker? That is completely FUCKED UP!"

He fisted his hands in the front of my shirt, arms trembling, and I let him. He was right; this was completely fucked. "I know," I said softly. "I can't help it. I've tried…"

"Try harder."

"Jacob -" I stopped speaking, but neither of us broke our stare as the door opened again. Demetri took a couple of steps into the room and froze, his suddenly wary gaze bouncing back and forth between me and Jacob.

"What the…"

We eased away from each other, and Jacob took a deliberate step back. His thoughts were still too confused and furious to be coherent, even in his own head. Demetri moved cautiously toward us. "What the hell is going on?"

"Edward's in love with the human," Jacob told him disgustedly.

"The human?" Demetri asked, completely confounded by the scene he had interrupted.

"Yes, the human. Isabella Swan. He thinks he's in love with her." Jacob was back to glaring.

Demetri swung wide, stunned eyes to me. "Wha…That's…Huh?"

They stared at me like I was some mythical creature. Which I was. _Hell_. Hence our current predicament. I pinched the bridge of my nose, closing my eyes.

"She knows, doesn't she? She knows about us, about Phil – that he's a vampire." Demetri stared at me. I didn't move, didn't say anything, and that was admission enough. "I thought as much. You've just been acting so strange these past couple of weeks." He paused for a moment, frowning in thought, and slowly continued. "Well, that's okay, right? We can still deal. No need to call Felix yet. We'll just have to get rid of her ourselves, right away. It's not your usual thing, I know, Edward, but since you want the girl – I know how badly you want her blood – just take her to bed and fuck her out of your system. You can just rip through her jugular when you rip through her -"

Demetri was sailing through the air and crashing through the wall on the other side of the room before he could complete the sentence, but not before he completed his thought, unfortunately. I followed and braced above him, heaving in rage, my arm across his throat.

"One more word," I seethed, "one more thought, and I'll rip your head off and burn your body."

There was silence in the room as he carefully blanked his mind. I once again struggled to bring my temper under control; I could actually hear Jacob shaking as he fought the urge to phase at the danger in the air. I stared intently into Demetri's eyes until I got nothing but thoughts of kittens and sunshine. I stood and offered my hand to him, and as he took it I pulled him to his feet.

I looked at them both. "I'll take care of this. It's not your problem; you won't be involved. I'll deal with it."

Jacob gritted his teeth. Demetri returned my stare, not without sympathy. "Edward, it's too late. We are involved. This is a problem for all of us."

_It's too late_. Demetri's words echoed though my head. _Too late_. Yes, it was much too late. Too late for me, but I would not allow Bella to be affected by the ugliness of my world. She didn't deserve such a fate. If it was the last thing I did in my long, miserable existence, I would make sure she was safe.

"Edward." I could see true regret in Demetri's eyes. We had been good friends for a long time. "I don't have any choice. I'll give you as much time as I possibly can, but I have to tell Felix and Aro. I'm sorry."

My shoulders sagged. "I know. Thank you, Demetri."

He put his hand on my back and shook his head. "I am sorry, Edward. More than I can say." He tilted his head. "Have you thought of…changing her?"

I cringed involuntarily before he got the words out. "I will not take her soul. I won't allow anyone to harm her. Certainly not myself."

He shook his head. "You always do things the hard way, my friend. Jacob?"

Jacob studied me thoughtfully. "I'll stay. I can help."

"Jacob," I said warningly, seeing the half-thought plans in his head. He'd been angry, but I could sense his sympathy with my situation now that he understood.

"No, I'm supposed to have your back, and I will. They know now Demetri is useless at tracking her." He couldn't hide his smirk at that. "But I can through scent. He can tell them I stayed behind to try to pick up your trail. It might buy you some more time."

"I can track Edward," Demetri pointed out.

"Yeah, maybe, but not well. Everyone knows it would be pretty much impossible to find Edward if he doesn't want to be found – he's always one step ahead. It would take you a really, _really_ long time." Jacob raised his brow suggestively, and Demetri chuckled.

"Kid has a point. I can wait until tomorrow, maybe the day after to contact Aro and head back to Volterra. That will give you a head start."

"Thank you," I said sincerely. "I don't deserve it, but I will accept – for Bella."

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Don't be any more idiotic or girly than you already are, Edward. I'm gonna be sick."

Leave it to Jacob to put it in perspective.

"What are you going to do, Edward?" Demetri inquired quietly, watching me as I stared out the window.

"I don't know," I admitted. "I need to think. There's quite a bit to consider."

He raised a brow and nodded. Jacob sighed. "I'll keep an eye on Isabella." He raised his hands in front of him as I whirled to face him with a snarl. "Just keep an eye on her, jeez, Edward." He rolled his eyes. "All looky, no touchy. Relax."

I nodded, forcing the tension from my body. I was messed up, no doubt about it.

I spent the night standing at the window, giving serious consideration to my options. There weren't many, and even less that I found acceptable.

One, I knew I could just let things be, fall where they may, and return to Volterra. Aro and Felix would take care of the situation, of Bella, as they saw fit. I shuddered. No, that was out of the question. Two, I could take care of the situation myself; succumb to the siren call of her scent, her blood. Take her life, let her lifeblood fill me and sooth the scorching ache in my throat and body. But I knew I couldn't continue existing if I caused her death. Option three, I could end us both. I thought about this. It could be done, and I knew I could arrange the end of my own existence, but…there was no way I could consider ending hers. After struggling so hard to keep her alive, after having made the irrevocable decision to do so…No. I just couldn't fathom it.

So, knowing I couldn't bear to allow any harm come to her, from any source – option four. We could run. I knew it would be difficult at best, if not impossible, to successfully track me. I could sense any tracker's thoughts before they could get anywhere near me – us. We could run and hide, and keep running until the end of her natural life. But what kind of life was that for her?

Option five…Yes. There it was – option five in all its horrifying, tantalizing, seductive glory. I could change her. I could turn her into a monster, my equal. My mate. I wanted that with everything in me, more than her blood, more than anything I've ever wanted before. I tried to separate my desire from the practical. Was it the best solution to the problem at hand, or just the one I wanted the most? I couldn't honestly answer that. I wanted her so badly.

But I didn't want her life in exchange. I didn't want to jeopardize her soul. The diametrically opposed desires – both physical and mental – were about to drive me mad.

I examined each option from every angle I could find. I took them all through their individual stages, what it would entail, what I needed to make each happen, and the probable outcomes. Squeezing my eyes shut, I moved for the first time in many hours. I knew where I needed to start. I needed to talk to Bella. She deserved the truth from me. She deserved a say in her fate, in her future. She needed to know everything that was going on, even if it meant she would never speak to me again. That didn't matter, not really, not in the long run. I would spend the rest of my existence ensuring she was safe.

I got into the shower to clean up, contemplating how best to approach her. I wasn't sure she would let me, not after how we had parted last, her running in hysterics from me. I would have to try.

_Not her apartment_, I thought as I pulled on fresh pants and a shirt. It was too enclosed, and too imbued with her scent. It wasn't worth the risk. I seriously doubted she would ever be inside this apartment with me again, so…outside. I could arrange to meet her after her classes, out on campus. There would be other people around, of course, too many, but I could get a feel for her reaction to me, and we could go from there. I grabbed my leather jacket and headed for the door, only to have it open before I could reach for the handle.

"Jacob," I acknowledged, pausing as he stopped in the doorway.

"Back with us?" he asked with a quirked brow.

"Yes." I frowned with impatience when he didn't budge.

"She wants to see you," he blurted out, and my eyes widened in surprise. "Isabella. Bella, I mean."

"She does?" I stared at him. Was it possible? I tried to read his thoughts, but they were swirling, jumbled. I saw her face in his mind, and latched on to the vision. "How do you know?"

His eyes flickered away uncertainly, and he was…blushing? "Uh, well, I may have talked to her today. Earlier. Just a little bit ago."

"You spoke with her?" My frown deepened as I saw a blurry scene of him talking to her in his mind, and I felt anger rolling up my spine. "You were supposed to just be watching out for her, Jacob. Not making contact. Not talking to her, damn it."

"I know, but she saw me," he admitted sheepishly. "I didn't expect it…well, anyway. She came up to me, wanted to know why I was following her." I couldn't help a smile at this, leave it to Bella to not only notice Jacob's surveillance, but call him on it. "So, I introduced myself. I told her you were worried about her, that you just wanted to be sure she was okay, but you thought she wouldn't want to see you."

He paused, and I prompted impatiently, "And…?" I was frustrated at not seeing his thoughts clearly.

"She said she wanted to talk to you. She was worried about you, too. She didn't think you wanted to see her." He snorted. "You two are quite the fucked up pair. Talk to her, Edward. Get your shit straight so I don't have to feel like I need to be looking over my shoulder all the time. I want to be done here."

"I was on my way to see her," I admitted. "Thanks, Jacob." I frowned. "But I still don't think you should have talked to her."

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes again. "Go get the girl, bloodsucker."

**X-X-X-X-X**

I stood at the bottom of the wide steps of the building where I had seen Isabella – was it only a little less than a month ago? – leaving her class on the fateful day I first spoke with her. Humans scurried around my still form as I watched the doors for her to appear. I warranted a couple of sidelong, nervous glances, but no one spoke to me, and all gave me a wide berth. I only marginally noticed. Finally, I saw her emerge from the building, her head down, hair covering her face, shoulders hunched. Other students rushed past her, bumping and crowding her. I frowned, but she didn't seem to pay any attention to the rude jostling. She made it about halfway down the stone stairs before her head snapped up, and she looked directly at me. She stopped.

A couple of people behind her gave her dirty looks for halting right in the middle of the flow of students. She took a couple of steps closer to me, her eyes never leaving my face. I shoved my hands in my pockets, not knowing what else to do with them as she finally made her way down the stairs and across the sidewalk to stop in front of me.

"Bella," I murmured, searching her pale, expressionless face. "I'm sorry."

Her gaze went from my eyes, down to my feet, and back up. They were welling with tears, and without forethought, my hand lifted to touch her cheek. She made a small, broken sound, turning her cheek into my palm. I gasped, pulling her into my arms.

"Sorry, I'm so sorry," I murmured into her hair, closing my eyes and absorbing her warmth, her awful, amazing scent. Her arms came around my waist, and although I could barely feel the pressure, I knew she was squeezing me for all she was worth.

"I thought I'd never see you again." She leaned back, a single tear trailing down her soft cheek. She wiped at it, and I grabbed her fingers, bringing them to my mouth and gently kissing the tips. That one small taste was indescribable. Her breath hitched in her throat, and she stared at me in shock. I smiled sadly.

"Can we talk, Bella?" I asked quietly. "I have no right to ask you, but…"

"Yes," she said emphatically, taking my hand and holding on to it when I tried to gently pull away. She continued to amaze me with her lack of fear and acceptance of my strangeness. She looked around, as if just now realizing there were other people nearby. "Not here, though."

"No," I agreed, and paused. I wasn't sure where to suggest.

"My apartment?" she asked.

I shook my head, watching her closely, silently asking her to understand. "I don't think…your scent…"

"Oh. Okay." She frowned. "Is your place okay?"

I stared at her in wonder.

"What?" she asked when I didn't respond.

"You'd be willing to go back there?" I was incredulous.

"Yes." Her gaze softened on mine, and she reached up to touch my cheek hesitantly. "I'm not afraid of you, Edward."

I hoped I would give her no more reason to be. But knowing what we needed to discuss… "You're probably going to wish you'd never said that. Should we catch a cab?"

She nodded, and we walked to the street. She held my hand firmly, as if she thought I would disappear if she let go. We didn't speak, both of us lost in our private thoughts until we reached the stairs leading up to the flat. I could tell Jacob and Demetri weren't up there – that was one small relief. She walked ahead of me up the stairs, and I let myself be briefly distracted by the sway of her hips and the roundness of her curves in her faded jeans.

I opened the door and gestured her in, closing my eyes and inhaling her precious scent as she walked past me. I'd been without it for hours – how was it possible I could miss the torture so much? She paused, smiling when she saw the book she'd left still sitting on the coffee table. She sat on the sofa, looking at me expectantly.

I slowly walked over and lowered myself next to her, considering my words. "I have to apologize to you." She shook her head vigorously, but I nodded back firmly. "Bella, I am so very sorry for my behavior yesterday. It was unforgivable. I – I am going to try very hard to not let my…hunger take over like that again."

"I'm sorry, too, Edward," she murmured, reaching out slowly to touch my hand. When I made no protest, slightly stunned that she was apologizing to _me_, she took my hand in her much smaller one. "I shouldn't have sprung it on you like that. I should have known it would be a shock to you, and I know better than to shock a vampire." She managed a small smile that I could not bring myself to return. Her gaze dropped to our clasped hands. "So, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"Bella, I have some things to tell you, to talk to you about. Not all of them are pleasant." I gave a short, humorless laugh. "Actually, none of them are. But I want you to know that everything I tell you from now on will be the truth." She raised her eyes, and I met her gaze directly and earnestly. "I can't give you much, but I vow I will give you that. I promise you honesty. Will you trust me?"

Her eyes were wide, and she tightened her grip on my hand, her skin showing white at the knuckles. I could hear her increased heart rate and breathing, smell the quick burst of adrenaline in her system. "Yes, of course. I trust you, Edward. I always have."

I smiled crookedly and heard her breath hitch in response – she was staring at my mouth. I touched her chin with the tip of my finger and dropped my hands to my sides. It was harder than I had expected to lay this all out in front of her, but there was no conflict with what I had just promised. I owed her honesty, and that was what she would get from now on.

"Oddly enough, it helps that you know about us, about vampires," I began. "That's the problem here, but it's one thing I don't have to worry about – trying to convince you I'm telling the truth." I offered her a wry smile, and she returned it before frowning thoughtfully.

"I know it's odd, Edward, but why is it a problem?"

I took a careful breath, trying not to let my head swim with her scent. "Have you ever heard of the Volturi?"

A small frown marred her forehead. "Isn't that the company you work for?"

"Well, yes and no. I do work for the Volturi, and while there is a company they have put together by that name, it isn't actually what they are. The Volturi are like the ruling force in my world. They govern creatures like me, and all of the others. They're like the police, the government, the guard. Their main purpose is to make sure the secret of our existence is safe, that no one outside our world knows about supposedly mythical creatures. They make certain that those creatures abide by the rules of our kind." I paused to let her absorb this information.

"But you do work for them, right?" she asked. I nodded, and she took a deep breath. "What do you do for them?"

"What I told you before was true. I help gather information for them. They use it in our best interests."

"I don't understand. What does that mean?"

I took a deep breath. This was the really hard part. "Bella, I am part of a special group, the Elite Guard. Demetri and Jacob, who you've met, are part of the group. Felix is the fourth member; he isn't here right now. We track those who are suspected of breaking the rules of our world. We also track others who have found out about us."

"Others?" she asked softly.

"Humans," I confirmed, watching her closely. "It is against our laws for a human to know of the existence of mythical creatures. Vampires included."

I saw when she realized what I was telling her, why it was a "problem". She sat up and stared at me, her heart fluttering like a hummingbird. "Are you telling me you were tracking _me_?"

"Yes," I whispered, not taking my eyes from hers.

She sat frozen and then blinked once after a long moment. "And what are you supposed to do about me, now that you know…about my history with a vampire?"

"You have to understand, Bella, I have to make you realize that I will never let anything happen to you. Never." She gulped. "No one is going to hurt you. I won't allow it. You're safe, I vow to you. You will be safe."

She was quiet as she absorbed what I was telling her. "Are Demetri and Jacob vampires, too? Felix?"

"Demetri and Felix are. Jacob is a shapeshifter. He phases into a rather large wolf. Other than that, I suppose he's mostly human."

Her eyes widened.

"Demetri tracks," I explained. "Jacob protects and handles details. I listen to the subject and verify the truth of what they know, or what they have done. Felix…Felix disposes."

She turned sheet-white and swayed. I reached out to hold her steady in her seat, shocked when she didn't jerk away. "Disposes?" she wheezed. "He's going to dispose of me?"

"No!" I shouted forcefully and made an effort to calm myself. She was terrified enough. "I promised you I would keep you safe. I won't allow that to happen, I won't let anything hurt you, Bella. I swore to tell you the truth, so you can believe this."

"Why?" Her voice was weak and thready.

"Because you know too much -"

She shook her head violently back and forth, her hair swirling around her shoulders. "No, not that. Why are you protecting me? Why don't you just do your job, and let this Felix do his?"

I hissed and gave her a shake before I realized what I was doing. "Because I can't. Because I love you, damn it. I'd sooner end my own existence than to see one hair on your head harmed."

Her breathing stopped and she stared at me, wide-eyed. "You…love me?" she choked.

"Yes," I forced out between clenched teeth. "I'm sorry, Bella, I know it's too soon for you. You have to understand how we work, how vampires mate. When we fall in love, we fall forever. We are constant and unchanging, except when we find our mates. And once that change is made, once we find them, there is no going back. No matter what, I'll always be here, in whatever capacity you want me."

"You love me." She was still staring, much too calm, and much too still. But her heart was beating much too fast.

"Yes," I admitted. Why had I just blurted it out like that? _Smooth, Cullen,_ I chastised myself. I could have at least eased into the fact that I was irrevocably attached to her, and always would be. Stalker, much?

A sob broke through her composed façade and then another. My hands stroked her hair frantically. I'd made her hysterical. Tears ran down her face, and she…was suddenly in my arms.

"Oh, thank God, thank God!" She buried her face in my chest and wrapped her arms around my waist. "I never thought…I love you, too, Edward. It's crazy, I know, but…soul mates. It makes sense. I've loved you from that first moment at the café. I thought I was _crazy_! I never, ever expected you to feel the same."

"Shh," I soothed as she shook against me, hands clutching at my shirt. "Shh, my Bella. I'm here. And I'm not going anywhere." She'd handled the most horrifying revelations with stoic and unnatural calm, but broke at the idea I loved her. She _never_ reacted as I thought she would.

"P-promise!" she demanded, rearing back and glaring at me. "Promise you won't disappear! I was miserable yesterday after you made me leave. I was so scared. I thought I'd never see you again."

I met her eyes with shame. "Bella, I am sorrier than I can say. I promise you I will not let it happen again."

"Shh." It was her turn to sooth me. She stroked the hair from my temple and tucked it behind my ear. I shut my eyes in bliss at the feel of her hands on my face. She was quiet for too long, though, and I opened my eyes to meet her serious gaze.

"Can I ask you a question?" she asked quietly.

I chuckled, thinking of the last time she asked me that, and she smiled. "I imagine you have only about a million of them. Go ahead."

"What did you mean when you said your job was to listen and learn the truth? Do you – interrogate people?"

"No," I said slowly. Here it comes. "Bella, I can read minds."

She jerked back from me, her hand flying from my face to cover her mouth. "R-read minds?"

I nodded, watching her. She chewed on her lower lip as she searched my face.

"Um, so you can read my mind right now?" she asked nervously.

"No," I told her. "I can read everyone's mind except yours. You are the only creature I have ever come across since I've been changed that I cannot read." I allowed a small smile.

Her mouth opened into an "o". "How come?" she finally asked.

"How come what?"

"How come you can't read my mind?"

"I have no idea." I shook my head. "I've tried. I've really tried, but I just can't. It's very frustrating." I frowned down at her upturned face, stroking one fingertip along her cheek. "It's also surprisingly peaceful."

She smiled a satisfied, Cheshire cat smile. "Oh. Well. Good."

"Good?" I quirked a brow at her.

"Yeah. Good." She nodded assertively, but that gorgeous, mouthwatering blush flooded her cheeks. "That would be way too uncomfortable."

"Then I'm glad," I told her, and like I promised, it was the truth. I'd put up with the maddening frustration and confusion if it pleased her so much.

"How long since you've been – changed?" she continued. I was amazed that she was so accepting of my strange and – honestly – sometimes horrifying ability.

"Almost one hundred years," I told her, and her mouth dropped into the "o" again.

"Seriously?" Her curious expression made me smile.

"Yep."

"Wow." Her eyes were wide. "I have about one hundred years worth of questions for you, then."

That wiped all humor from my face and mind. If only I could be sure we had another hundred years – and more.

"Bella," I said slowly, seriously. "There are some other things we need to talk about. What we are going to do next. There's a lot to consider, a lot to think about, and none of it is going to be easy."

"As long as you really mean 'we', I'm good," she said.

I stood, pressing my lips to the top of her head so she knew it wasn't a rejection. I paced to the window and turned back to face her. "This isn't easy. It isn't going to be easy for either of us. But I want you to remember I will be honest with you, and I want you to be the same. I need you to think and consider carefully what we are about to discuss. No knee jerk reactions. This is serious and will affect more than just our lives."

"Okay," she agreed hesitantly.

I walked back over to her, taking her hands. "They're going to come after us," I began, squeezing slightly when she flinched. "I can keep you safe, Bella, no matter what. You have to believe that." She nodded her head, and I continued. "We have a couple of options, and you have to consider carefully what each will mean for you. I promise I will see you safe, no matter what you decide. Okay?"

"Yes," she said with certainty.

"You can go, Bella, if you wish." She flinched again, but I narrowed my eyes at her and she stilled the automatic protest. "You can leave all of this behind – mythical creatures, vampires, Volturi Guards, and the danger they represent to you. You can continue with your life, live a normal, natural life with friends and family. You won't have to live in fear, you can just move on, walk away without me, without any concern. I promise you your safety – I will make sure of it, but you'd never have to see me or deal with any of this again. It's a viable option, and one you should consider without any coercion or alarm." I'd watch over her for the rest of her life, always in the background, always unseen, if that was what she wanted and what it took to make her safe.

I knelt down in front of her to meet her solemn gaze. "We can also run, together. They can't track me, and with my mind reading abilities I will always know when someone is getting close. We can be off safely with time to spare, but we would constantly be moving, never able to settle, for the rest of your life. But I can promise you, they will never get near us. You will be safe."

I took a deep breath – the next option was difficult to even discuss. It was my biggest, most desperate fear, but at the same time it was my deepest, darkest desire. _It was yet another conflict tearing me apart. _I had to offer it, even though it made me feel almost sick to do so. "I can also – change you, Bella. Make you like me, a vampire. Then you would be one of us, and the rule wouldn't apply. But I would be condemning you to an eternity of nightmares. You would become a monster, like me, like my kind. You would never know a moment's peace from hunger, your throat burning, or the constant driving desire for blood. The eternal night. Damnation. It would mean sacrificing your soul.

"Either way, you'd have to give up so much. You'd have to give up living your life as you know it, or give it up quite literally. You wouldn't be able to contact your friends or your family – your father. It would be too dangerous for them and for you. You'd be giving up everything you know, for everything you don't."

She stared down at her lap. "Anything else?" she asked softly.

I didn't respond for a minute, and she looked up at me. I had promised her honesty, damn it. "I could end us both," I uttered softly. "End your life, and my existence. I had to think about it, Bella, but I can't do it."

Her eyes grew wide with horror. "No – why? Why would you end your life?"

"I wouldn't want to go on if you weren't in the world." Honesty.

"No. No," she repeated firmly when I opened my mouth to protest. "That I won't ever consider. Never. Take that right off the table, right now. Promise me, Edward. Swear to it."

"Bella…"

"Swear it!"

I nodded once in agreement, and she leaned in carefully to hug me. "Thank you."

I held her close, her warm, small, human body. "I'm going to ask you to think about all of this, think about it thoroughly and seriously, Bella. It affects just more than me and you. It will affect you for a lifetime, for eternity. I'm sorry for that."

She pulled back to look at me. "It's not your fault, Edward. I'd be dead now, if not for you, wouldn't I?" I grimaced. She was so right and so wrong on so many levels. She cupped my cheeks in her small hands. It was exquisite. "I'll give _you_ a promise. I'll think about all of this. I will consider everything you've told me. I'll probably have more questions, but let me think on this. And then we'll decide together."

It was quiet except for the sounds of our breathing. Her expression slowly changed from one of earnestness to one of intensity and longing. Her eyes flickered down to my mouth and lingered.

"Bella," I groaned softly, placing my palm at the base of her throat and feeling the flutter of her aroused pulse. I held her in place, held her from leaning forward against me, held her from the temptation that could ruin us both.

She licked her lips, and I groaned again. "Bella," I whispered, my gaze focusing on her mouth. "We can't – I can't, not right now. I don't want to influence you, and I can't test my control right now." I was hungry. I needed to feed and feed well before I could even think about her lips on mine.

She seemed to read my mind. One finger came up to touch the corner of my left eye. "Your eyes, they're so dark. You're hungry, aren't you?" After a second, I nodded. "Edward…" her voice trailed off, and she ducked her head. "Edward," she tried again in a low, miserable voice. "When was the last time you…ate?"

"The night before I met you," I admitted, my voice thick with regret.

She looked up at me, her eyes shiny with tears. "Weeks ago," she murmured. "Edward. Do you think…would it be possible for you to ever consider going back to …vegetarianism? To eat animals, like your family? If you…if I were ever to be changed, I couldn't bear the thought of…killing anyone."

I flinched violently and stood. I shut my eyes, and when I turned back to her I could face her honestly. "Bella, after meeting you, neither could I. I've already thought a lot about it, and I can't continue on like I have been. I meant it when I said once we found our mates we change. I've already thought about…finding another food source." This time she flinched, and I swallowed miserably. "I can't continue…the way I have been."

"Good," she said softly. "It wouldn't change how I feel about you, Edward, really," she added hastily when she saw I would protest, "but that makes it easier somehow."

We stared at each other from our positions a few feet away from each other. She slowly walked to me and put her hands on my waist, watching my face carefully. I swallowed the overflow of venom in my mouth at her proximity and very slowly mimicked her position, my hands fitting neatly into the curve above her hips. She smiled and stepped into my arms for a brief embrace.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" It came out as a question, muffled against my chest.

"Whenever you are ready, Bella. Take your time."

"I will," she assured me. "I just don't think I can go very long without seeing you." The admission was quiet, her hands fisting at the small of my back. "I still feel like you're going to disappear."

"Where else am I going to go?" I whispered into her hair softly. "You're here."

She lifted her face to mine, smiling reluctantly. I pressed a soft, gentle, lingering kiss to her forehead. Hunger flared through me, and I swallowed again as I resisted the urge to twitch my hips against hers. I clenched my teeth and ground my jaw. Her smile faded into a knowing grimace.

"I should go," she said softly, searching my face. Her hand reached up to touch the corner of my eye again. "You're hungry. They're black," she said in explanation when I raised a brow.

I nodded reluctantly and walked her to the door.

"I'll see you tomorrow," she said, repeating her earlier words, but this time they were more certain. She touched my cheek, and I closed my eyes in worry, bliss, and regret as she left.

She was right. I needed to feed and soon. I scowled. The thought of hunting was strangely abhorrent. Finding a human to feed on…I barely repressed a shudder. Killing a human for their blood so that I could better resist Bella was somehow…unworthy of her. It didn't feel right. In fact, it felt so far from right I was actually going to hunt an animal for the first time in decades. That thick, nasty, stinking, sour blood…How could that sound better to me than the nectar that ran through human veins?

But it did. It sounded right.

I still made a distasteful expression at the thought of the blood of animals – bleh. It would be difficult, but not anywhere near as difficult as the decision she had to make, no matter what it was. It was the least I could do for her. She'd made her feelings very clear on the issue of killing humans and feeding, and I found I was helpless to deny her anything that was within my power to give. I needed to go soon, before Demetri or Jacob returned. I didn't want them to see the conflict, the totally useless and pointless debate I was struggling with. I clenched my jaw in determination as I stalked down the stairs to the street, walking briskly through the crowds of humanity until I was at the city limits. Once there, I took off running for the countryside to do what I could to satisfy my base, monstrous nature.


	12. Chapter 11: Subtle Web

**SMeyer owns Twilight, I do not.**

**Betas silentnc and Sarasumbrella - thank you. They see stuff I miss or overlook, any boo-boos left are truly mine.**

* * *

**CHAPTER ELEVEN: Subtle Web**

When I returned I was full, but certainly not satisfied. I paused at the bottom of the stairs leading to the apartment, listening intently with both my ears and my mind.

Time had run out – Felix had arrived.

He was upstairs, his thoughts purposefully blank. He had heard my approach. I gritted my teeth, climbing the stairs slowly, searching for a center of calm. I reached the heavy door and took a deep, unnecessary breath before schooling my features into a blank mask. I pushed the door open and entered.

Felix stood across the room in the entrance to one of the bedrooms. He was silhouetted by the late afternoon sun behind him, but I could see every detail of him perfectly. He looked relaxed, but I could see him balanced on his toes, weight advantageously distributed, arms loose at his sides. His eyes swept my form curiously.

"Hello, Edward," he greeted me calmly.

"Felix," I returned in the same neutral tone. I could read his shock at the strange, mottled amber color of my eyes.

He was doing a very good job of blanking his thoughts from me, but no one was that good – except for my Bella. The thought of her steeled my resolve. I watched and waited, and finally his thoughts came through in fits and bursts. _Ah_. Aro had grown impatient and sent him when he had not heard from any of us. I snorted.

"He has been concerned for all of you," Felix said, and I arched a brow skeptically. Felix shrugged. "It isn't like you to not report in on schedule."

"We have run into an unusual situation. I was waiting to fully understand what's going on before reporting back and sending for you. Why are you here, Felix?"

He studied my face, and a slight grin spread across his features. "Direct as always, Edward. I'm here for the girl."

I couldn't hide my furious reaction, an infinitesimal twitch. His eyes narrowed in on the involuntary movement.

"Why?" I asked softly, and then I saw it in his mind. Aro had sent him to bring Bella back to Volterra, to him, to be…dealt with. There was something else, but I couldn't focus on it before Felix buried it behind the translation of ancient military strategies.

"Why Volterra?" I asked, surprised. "Why would he want you to bring her there?"

Felix grimaced, annoyed with my ability. "I don't know, Edward. I follow orders, like I'm told."

"No," I said calmly, implacably, imitating his deceptively relaxed stance.

He slowly shook his head. "Edward, you know the rules, the procedure. Can you honestly tell me she's innocent? That she has no knowledge of our existence?" I didn't answer, and his expression changed to one of confusion. "You know what has to happen. You know what I have to do."

"No," I repeated.

He gave a frustrated shake of his head. "I don't understand what's going on here, but tell me where she is, save me some time, and let's move on. You know I'm going to take care of it sooner than later. I'm hungry, and we all need to get back to Volterra."

"No," I growled for the third time, my fists clenching at my sides. He didn't overlook the gesture. "She's mine, Felix. I won't let you have her."

His mouth dropped open in shock. "Yours?" he rasped. "_Yours_?" His eyes were wide and confused. "What the hell do you mean, she's yours?"

"She's mine," I repeated evenly. "You won't have her. Neither will Aro. She is mine."

"Are you planning on killing or changing her yourself?" he asked, incredulous. The look on my face answered him. "Edward, you know I can't leave until I've seen her body, or seen her changed – or done it myself."

"I need some time," I told him. "I need -"

He shook his head regretfully. "I can't, Edward. I've got pretty explicit orders. You know I do."

"Please, Felix," I said softly, and his face fell. I would beg for her. I would beg for her life, and more, if it would help.

"I can't," he said just as softly, regretfully. I knew it would do no good. "Let's just get this over with, Edward. Tell me where she is."

"I can't. I'll take care of this, I promise. I'll take care of it."

His eyes met mine with compassion and understanding. He realized this was more than an assignment to me. "I'm sorry, Edward." His stance changed subtly, and I instantly mimicked the motion.

"You can't get past me," I told him. "You know you can't. It will just be ugly and painful, and neither of us can win. Felix, you know you can't beat me."

He studied me and then relaxed. I did not. I could see he was trying to find a way to get past my knowledge and defenses. Finally he sighed, both mentally and physically, and I allowed myself to relax slightly.

"I won't fight you now, my friend," he said. I nodded, grateful. "But it will only buy you hours, a day or two at most. "

"I know," I said. Bella and I were going to have to run. "He'll just send you back when they've found us again."

"No." He looked at me with sympathy, regret, and finality. I saw it in his mind at almost the same time he thought it. I froze in horror. "Aro won't send me again. Edward, he'll send James and Jane. God help you and the girl then."

He walked past me, placing his hand on my shoulder, pausing briefly before he shook his head, and walked out the door. His parting thought was clichéd, but nothing if not appropriate. _It's been nice knowing you…_

I was out of options and out of time. I knew what I needed to do – no, what I wanted to do. I could offer Bella my life, my protection, my body, my love. My name. My cold, dead heart was hers, if she would accept it. But above all I had to keep her safe, no matter what it took. No matter my own personal damned feelings or opinions. She was the only thing that mattered. If she didn't choose me, then that would be that. She would acquire a vampire stalker for the rest of her natural life. I would dedicate myself to making sure she was in no danger from my kind, from my world, but she would never have to see me again. But if she did choose me, I must be prepared to give her…everything.

My cell phone was in my hand, my finger hovering over the digit that would speed dial the number I had been debating about calling for weeks. I steadied my resolve and courage, and pressed the button. I grimaced to myself as I brought the phone up slowly to my ear. One ring, and then I heard her dear, familiar, and irritated voice.

"Of course I will, you big, dumb, stupid idiot."

I sighed and smiled, running a hand through the hair at my temple. "Hello, Alice."

**X-X-X-X-X**

Twelve hours later, after taking the time to hunt again in a small, forested area outside the city, I found myself waiting for Alice in the main terminal of the Charles de Gaulle airport. I was in a crowd of humans waiting for their loved ones, and for the first time since I had left that condition behind I could feel a sort of kinship for their excitement. I now knew what it was like to long to see the one you loved above all else. It was all Bella's fault.

I saw Alice from a distance. She was walking rapidly, stopping every few paces to jump up to see over the crowd. I knew when she spotted me as I heard her gasp and she ran to me, dodging at too quick of a speed, weaving past the people and barriers to launch herself into my arms.

"Edward!" she cried, clasping her arms tightly around my neck and her legs around my waist, hugging her tiny body to me with all her considerable strength. "It is you! Oh, I've missed you so much!" She pressed her lips to mine in a delighted, smacking kiss. "What, no Volturi grey robe and mysterious hood? I'm so disappointed." She reared her head back, and her jaw went slack with astonishment. "Edward! You…your eyes. They're…gold."

"Let it go, Alice," I said uncomfortably.

She hugged me, her thoughts whirling and darting with excitement, happiness, and satisfaction. I pinched her, and she squeaked, slapping at my hand again. People smiled as they walked around us, thinking how nice it was to see a happy young couple reunited. I smiled to myself, and then pried her little arms away to lean back and grin into her happy face. "Hello, by the way. I hope Jasper isn't right behind me, waiting to take my face off."

She grinned back, practically vibrating in her happiness. "Don't be silly. He'd never let me make a spectacle of myself if he was here. He'll be along later tonight. We're heading for Rome." She waggled her eyebrows suggestively, and I winced at her thoughts. "He'll be happy to see you?" She said it questioningly, wondering if I would be happy to see her husband – my brother – as well.

I loosened my hold, sliding her down to rest her lightly on her own two feet. "I…I just don't know, Alice. Did you bring it?"

She looked up into my face all too knowingly and pursed her lips. "I did," she affirmed after a long minute. "But let's not talk about it here. Is there someplace a little more private?"

I glanced around at the swarm of people in the airport. "There's a small bar just down the way. Dark, quiet corners – it will suit." I took her arm, and guided her in the appropriate direction.

As we walked in silence to the small niche bar, I could hear her thinking _he's back, I've got my brother back_, and it made me feel both happy and undeniably guilty at the same time. After a discreet and generous tip to the host of the bar, we were seated immediately at an intimate booth in the back corner. No one else was in the vicinity. We placed an order for drinks so as not to arouse too much suspicion, and I waited until they were delivered to our table. "So?" I asked impatiently, pushing both sweating glasses aside.

"Oh, everyone at home is fine, Edward. They'll be so gratified to know of your concern," she snapped irritably.

I gazed down in shame at my hands clasped together on the table. "I'm sorry, Alice," I apologized softly. "It's very difficult."

"For us, too," she insisted, placing one of her hands over mine. "It's not the same without you at home. Everyone misses you, even Rosalie." We both looked at each other and grinned, and then her smile faded. "_I_ miss you, Edward, so much."

"I know," I said softly, picking up her small hand and pressing it to my lips. "I miss you, too. I miss my best friend and favorite sister."

After a moment she sighed and drew her hand back. "You're so damn stubborn, Edward, but I love your angsty little ass."

"Thank you, Alice." I knew my wry tone would make her smile, and it did. She sighed again, and reached into the compact handbag she carried. After a quick rummage she carefully placed a small, black velvet box on the table between us.

I stared at it, my stomach tightening in fear and anxiety, terror and joy, and bone deep satisfaction. I reached a finger out to stroke the soft material, but made no move to pick it up. I knew what it contained – my mother's engagement and wedding rings. Elizabeth Masen's rings, given to her by my father, Edward, Sr., in the late 1800's.

"Can I meet her?" Alice asked softly, studying my face. "Please, Edward?"

"Haven't you already?" I asked with a lopsided smile, touching the side of her head. Alice had visions, could see the future. I am sure she had been sitting at our home in Hoquiam, the box with the ring and her cell phone sitting on her lap, waiting for my call before I even realized I was going to be making it.

"I want to _meet_ her, meet her," she insisted, slapping at my hand.

"Soon, I hope" I said quietly, and took her hand in mine when she would have protested. "Alice, I need to know…I need to ask you. Have you…seen? Am I doing the right thing?"

She didn't answer right away, and I looked up sharply from where I had been studying the seemingly insignificant velvet box that was about to irrevocably change my existence. She was gazing at me with an expression on her face I could not decipher.

She squeezed my fingers with the hand I held, and then brought her other one up to do the same. She leaned forward, never taking her eyes from mine. _They'll kill her, Edward_, she thought, not wanting to say it out loud, and my hands bore down on hers in shock. I jerked, but she kept her gaze steady on mine. _They'll kill her, or they'll change her themselves. Make her do their will. You know this. You don't need me or my visions to tell you._

My eyes squeezed shut, and I pressed my forehead to hers. "Yes," I growled. "I know. I guess I just needed to hear it said out loud, so to speak." And then her words hit me. "What do you mean, they'll change her themselves? Why would they want to _change_ her?"

Alice studied me curiously. "Edward, don't you know? You mean, you haven't guessed?"

"Guessed what, Alice?" I had no idea what she was talking about, and no patience to play games.

"About Bella." She looked at me quizzically.

"What about Bella?" I gritted from between my teeth. "Alice, what?"

"She's a shield, Edward. That's why Aro is so interested in her. She's a very powerful shield."

I sat perfectly still. It was impossible. Wasn't it? No one, especially in human form, could be that strong of a shield – so strong that abilities as developed and potent as mine would be useless. Ah, wait…so that was what Felix had managed to hide from me. It wasn't the fact that she was my singer that made my mind reading powers ineffective with her, Demetri's were as well, and had been right from the beginning. How did I not realize this? He couldn't track her – no one could. He couldn't track me either. I could read his mind and be gone before he knew it. This opened up all kinds of possibilities for our future. Speaking of which…

"Can you see her in your visions, Alice? Can you see her future?"

"Only as they pertain to someone else," Alice said. "She blocks me, too. I can see only when someone else has made some sort of decision that includes her. For instance, I can see her marrying you, but only because you've made the decision to ask. She's going to say yes, of course, but that's your future I'm seeing, not hers. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to see her at all."

The immense relief I felt at her statement she could see Bella marrying me was tempered by the fact that it was based on my choices, not Bella's. I still had no idea what the decision concerning our future would be, but I hoped – I actually had _hope _– that Alice's visions were accurate.

"But you've seen her…dead." I expressed one of my biggest fears. "Or changed and working against her will for the Volturi. Based on what I decide." Alice nodded miserably. I considered this carefully. "So, Aro knows. He knows she's a shield." _How long has he known?_ I wondered. _From the beginning?_ Was this an ulterior motive for sending us after Bella, one other than Phil telling stories he shouldn't?

Alice shrugged in answer to my unvoiced question. "But I've also seen her changed, with you," she pointed out. "So that decision still needs to be made." She stared blankly for a moment, and then focused back on my eyes.

I grimaced. I had to ask. "Do you…Alice, do you see _me…_ hurting her?"

She slid quickly around the vinyl booth, wrapping her arms around me and holding tight. "It will be all right, Edward," she assured me. "Just please, please talk to Bella. Really listen to her, with your heart and your head. Make the decision together. You'll know what to do."

I laughed weakly, giving her one last squeeze and releasing her. It felt good to be able to do that without having to monitor and control every movement, every ounce of my strength. "You and Carlisle have more faith in me than I deserve."

"No," she insisted, sliding back around to her side of the table. "We just know you best. Better than you know yourself most of the time. You never give yourself enough credit, Edward. I'm hoping Bella can help you with that."

"She has, more than she knows," I admitted, and Alice beamed. I picked the box up off the table to enclose it in my fist. It felt like it belonged there somehow, and I tucked it securely into my jacket pocket. I took a deep breath, not that I needed it, but it helped ease the knot inside me.

"I need a safe place," I told her. "No matter what we decide, I need somewhere I know we can be safe, for a little while." I took another deep breath, but this time it did not ease the sharp pain in my chest. It didn't help with the shame and disgust I felt for myself. So I just said it.

"I need to bring her home."

There, it was out, and the world did not end. "I – I'll need to talk to Carlisle first, though," I continued, feeling somehow lighter. "I need to make sure it's all right with him and Esme. But I just can't…not over the phone, and I can't leave her right now, either. It's not safe. It would kill me to leave her alone, even with you and Jasper."

Alice was watching me with sympathy and understanding on her face. "Of course," she said simply. "That's why he came."

A feeling of unreality washed over me as she looked over her shoulder. I followed her gaze to see Carlisle standing a few tables away, a cautious but pleased smile on his face. "Carlisle?" I whispered, no strength in my voice.

"Hello, Edward. It's good to see you." He stood, not moving, uncertain of his reception. I rose unsteadily to my feet.

We stared at each other, and it was too much. Everything I'd been trying to deal with, all the emotions and feelings that had crashed down over my head after decades of numb blankness, had been so massively overwhelming, but suddenly everything snapped into place. "Father," I breathed, and suddenly he was hugging me, and it was all right.

We sat, and I looked around surreptitiously. There were only a couple of other patrons in the dim bar, and they were on the other side of the room. Our foreign presence prevented anyone else from coming near the private alcove. We spoke at a speed and level that no human could hear, and I could sense there were no other creatures in the vicinity to cause a threat.

"This will be fine," Alice said, putting her hand on my arm as she sensed my tension.

I nodded, reflexively taking a deep breath. "So…I have a problem." They both listened intently as I described my relationship with Bella and the events that led to where we stood now. Alice was beaming and wildly excited that I had finally found my mate. Carlisle was also happy for me, but I could read concern and some confusion in his thoughts.

"Did you say her mother's friend was a vampire named Phil?" he asked.

"Yes," I answered, trying to read what he was mulling over in his head. He gave me a small smile and a brief twitch of his head.

"Edward, do you know what Phil's talent is?"

I slowly shook my head. I was sure Bella had never mentioned Phil having any special abilities. I stared at Carlisle in surprise as I caught a glimpse of what he was thinking.

"What?" Alice demanded, looking back and forth between us. She tried to force a vision, but was frustrated when she couldn't fathom what Carlisle was sharing with me. "C'mon you guys, what?"

"Phil has a unique ability," Carlisle began, his eyes never leaving mine as I slowly began to understand the ramifications of the story he was about to tell. "He…facilitates relationships. He makes it possible for mates to meet each other, to be brought together – vampires, mostly – when there are obstacles. He has a sense of who are mated and the issues concerned with them finding each other. He makes it possible for their paths to cross and connect." Alice's brows rose as I sat back in shock at what I read in his head.

"You see," Carlisle continued, "Phil was Esme's neighbor when she was a child, when she broke her leg. I obviously didn't know it at the time. Phil kindly recommended my medical services. That was the first time I ever saw her. And then, later – much later – he was the one who found her after she…jumped off the cliff. He brought her to me. I realized then he was a vampire, and he explained how he had been involved in our meeting years before. He left, disappeared, right after that, and…well. You both know what happened with me and Esme."

Alice and I both stared at him, processing the amazing information. "So," Alice began. "This Phil, he brought you and Esme together, and now he has brought Edward and Bella together?"

Carlisle nodded with a smile. "It would appear so."

"That's just way too cool." Alice turned to me with wide eyes.

"So, he just pushed us together?" I asked, frowning, aware of an uncomfortable sensation settling in my abdomen. "Set us up to be together?"

Alice smacked me – plenty hard – in the back of my head. "For crying out loud, Edward, you're a pain in the ass. Quit being such an idiot. Weren't you listening? Phil has the ability to bring mates together, not make them mates to begin with. Bella's always been your mate; you just hadn't found each other. Phil just put the circumstances together for you two to finally meet – to find each other."

I considered this, rubbing absently at the back of my head where she had hit me. "Oh." It was quite an involved and complicated, but I had to appreciate the Machiavellian aspects of it.

She rolled her eyes at Carlisle. "Edward, it's okay to be happy. Really. It happens."

I scowled at her. "Happy? Happy that Aro wants to kill her? That I want to kill her, too, but at the same time protect her with my life? That every second I'm with her I can only barley control the pain, the blood-lust I feel for her? Yeah, Alice, I'm all a-quiver with happiness."

She grabbed my face this time, and Carlisle chuckled. "You listen to me, brother. You know what you have to do to fix this. Do it. You'll both be happy. You have the ability, you have the power, and you have the ring. Just quit being all Edwardly and just do it. She loves you. It will work out."

"It has to be her decision, Alice. I can't force her into anything – it's too much. It all has to be hers to decide."

Alice got that familiar, faraway look in her eye, and released my face. I stretched my jaw gingerly. She was small, but she was fierce. Her eyes cleared and snapped to my face in smug satisfaction.

"What?" I asked wearily. "What did you see, Alice?" The visions had flickered too quickly through her head for me to be able to focus on what they meant.

"I'm not telling." She rose, patting my head. "You'll just have to wait and see yourself. But I can't wait to meet her." She met Carlisle's amused gaze. "I'll let him ask what he needs to ask, because he's Edward and you know he's going to be miserable about it. I'll go check on Jasper's flight."

I watched her go in irritation and turned back to see Carlisle watching me with amusement, exasperation, and affection. He was relaxed in the chair, his hands steepled in front of him as he waited patiently for me to speak.

"So," I began, leaning forward and resting my elbows on the table. If I were human, I'd be jiggling my leg uncontrollably. It was a hard habit to restrain, as it was.

Carlisle arched a brow inquiringly when I didn't continue. I could sense his cautious excitement as he gazed into my gold eyes. I hadn't realized how much it had torn at him, my choices and decisions. The sadness both he and Esme experienced when I left, and when I returned to a more…traditional diet. He was trying to hide it from me, but I grimaced at the pain I had caused this man.

"I'm sorry, Carlisle," I murmured, looking down. I couldn't meet his eyes, filled only with love and kindness. He should be angry and frustrated, disappointed at the least, but I could sense none of those emotions. I didn't deserve his unfailing affection and forgiveness any more than I deserved Bella's, but I needed both badly.

"You've done nothing to be sorry for, Edward," he said in his quiet, calm voice.

I leaned back in my chair and scoffed, my mind sorting through the many and various things that proved his statement a lie. "Carlisle, I've -"

"Let me rephrase that, then," he interrupted me with a small smile. "You've done nothing you need to apologize to me for, as far as I'm concerned. Edward, you are bright, brilliant, and talented. Your mind is an amazing and complicated thing. I know you've struggled, and I am sorry for that. But…I love you. I'm happier than I can say to see you. I hope that once you work through all these complications, you'll be in a better place than you've been in recent decades. And I selfishly hope that place is back with your family. We all miss you, Edward."

"Complications," I mused, rubbing my forehead. "I seem to be an expert – a magnet for them."

Carlisle chuckled. "Well, I can't deny that you do seem to bring it on yourself."

I returned his smile and nodded in acknowledgement. I grew serious, though, knowing what I had to ask.

"It's going to be dangerous," I murmured. "I feel terrible knowing I'm asking for something that will most likely bring trouble to you all. I wouldn't, _couldn't_ ask you, except for...Bella. I'd risk anything for her. I'm just not sure I have the right to ask all of you to risk anything, for either of us."

"You do, and you can," he assured me.

I took a deep breath of air into my lungs. "Carlisle, I'd like to come home. I want to come back and bring Bella with me. I don't know how long we can stay. I don't know what her decision about her future will be. But if she…decides to stay with me, in any way, we'll need someplace safe and familiar to go to, to make plans. And I want her to meet you, and everyone to meet her, too. Carlisle, I'd like to come home."

"Of course. Of course you can." He stood, and I embraced him again, relief roaring through me. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

"You'll need to talk to the others," I said, pulling away and trying to ease the tightness in my chest. "They have to understand the problems that will follow us. I have to be sure they agree, that they can accept the trouble -"

"They can and they do." He raised a brow at my skeptical look. "You doubt Emmett will not only be thrilled to have you back, but delighted that he might get to strategize a fight, too?"

"Rosalie," I pointed out, returning the arched brow.

"Rosalie." He grinned and shrugged, holding onto my shoulders. "Well, that can be your penance, then, yes?"

I laughed, nodding. I met his gaze directly, hoping he could read my gratitude and sincerity. "Thank you, Carlisle."

He clasped his hand to my neck and nodded briskly. "Esme is going to be over the moon," he told me. "Not only to see you again, to have you back, but you're bringing her a daughter."

"I hope so," I uttered fervently, my fingers unconsciously touching the box that held my future through my jacket. "God, I hope so."

**X-X-X-X-X**

Jasper's flight came in on time a couple of hours later. We all spent some time talking and catching up, and discussing possibilities for my and Bella's future. We had plenty of time before their connecting flight to Rome, and Carlisle's return flight back to the States. I felt guilty once again for causing him so much down time in travel, but he told me it was time well spent.

"Come home soon," Alice whispered in my ear as she hugged me tight. "I can't wait to meet my new sister."

Jasper smirked at me as he shook my hand and pulled me into an affectionate hug. "Come home soon," he repeated Alice's sentiment. "I miss my brother."

I nodded, somewhat overwhelmed by their unconditional support and wishes for me to return.

_I told you_, Carlisle thought as he clasped me in a fierce hug. _Just come home soon_.

I grinned and rolled my eyes, but stayed and watched as the three members of my family walked away. I certainly planned on seeing them all before long, and hopefully with Bella by my side. Either way, I knew I would no longer be working for the Volturi. I also knew I would be reaffirming my commitment to my family's vegetarian lifestyle – Bella had changed me in more ways than one. The thought of hunting and consuming even depraved humans was distasteful – more so than animal blood.

My cell phone rang as I made my way out to the taxi stand. My spirits lifted even more as I saw it was Bella calling.

"Hey," I said softly, but my grin was wide.

"Hey yourself. Where are you?"

"Just finishing up some errands." I stepped into the next cab in line and handed the driver a card with the address of our flat on it. "Why?"

"I just – heard some weird noises in the background. Are you on your way home?"

_Yes_, I thought with great satisfaction. _Finally. Thanks to you_. "I'm on my way back to my apartment," I clarified.

"Will Jacob and Demetri be there?" she asked. I stilled.

"I don't think so." I could make sure they weren't. "Why?"

"I've thought about things, Edward. We should talk. Make those decisions together."

If my heart was still beating it would have stopped, the pain in my chest was so very similar. "Are you sure?" She'd only had overnight to consider her options.

"I'm sure, Edward. We need to be sure together, though, don't you think?"

"Yes, of course. I'll be back in about 30 minutes."

"I'll be there." The conviction and rightness of her words was unmistakable.

I wavered between wishing the cab would go faster and that it would stop altogether. This was shaping up to be the most important discussion of my existence. I was…nervous? Yes, terribly so. Had I ever felt nervous since I'd become a vampire? I couldn't recall an instance. Hell.

The taxi arrived at the apartment before my thoughts were completely reconciled. I didn't see Bella until I entered the small courtyard, but there she was, sitting on the bottom step leading up to the flat. I stopped in my tracks, taking in her pale face, and she jumped up into my arms. I caught her up close. She laughed and wrapped herself around me.

"Hi!" she laughed breathlessly as she pulled back to look into my tense face. The smile faded. "Oh. Oops?"

I inhaled her burning, scorching, delectable scent, and held her tighter when she would have slid away from me. "No. No oops. Hi, yourself." I hooked her legs around my waist.

She leaned back, staring into my face. Her eyes widened, and her mouth opened before she bit her lip. Her eyes shimmered as she looked at me.

"Bella, what's wrong?" I asked in concern.

"Your eyes," she whispered. "Edward, they're gold. Well, mostly. How -"

"The squirrel and bunny population of Paris be warned. Edward Cullen is on a diet," I teased, pretending to gag.

She grinned and put her hands behind my neck as I carried her swiftly, effortlessly, up the stairs. "Mmm," she hummed with a mischievous grin. "Sexy."

I arched a dubious brow and gave a small, lopsided smile. Her breath hitched. I reached behind her to open the door and set her down reluctantly in the main room in front of the coffee table. She wandered around as I watched her curiously.

"Would it be weird for me to say I missed you last night?" she asked shyly, stopping across the room from me, looking sheepish.

I slowly shook my head, not taking my gaze from her. "No, not at all. I feel the same way. But I wanted to give you time, Bella, give you space to think about -"

She quickly, almost gracefully, crossed the room to me. She took one of my hands in hers, and I watched in stunned amazement as she brought it to her mouth and pressed her warm, soft lips to my cold, hard fingers.

"I was up pretty much all night, thinking about everything you said. I've decided, Edward. We just need to discuss the details.

"I want you to change me."


	13. Chapter 12: Upon YOur Bed

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, I only own this.**

**My lovely betas silentnc and Sarahsumbrella - they held my hand through this one and made it SO much better. I can't tell you how cool it is to have such great input and help.**

**If you're under the legal age of consent, I'll ask that you stop reading - I know you probably won't, but it makes me feel better. Rated M, people. I've apologized enough last week for swearing in the presence of children, and I don't want to further my guilt by corrupting the minds of innocent youngsters with lemons.**

**Yes, there are lemons in this chapter. Hurry on or stop completely, depending on how old you are and your enjoyment for that sort of thing...**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWELVE: Upon Your Bed**

"What?" I gasped, reeling. I'd pretty much expected this, but to hear her put it so plainly, so bluntly…I guess I wasn't truly prepared after all.

She held on to my hands firmly, staring up into my face. I saw no hesitation, no uncertainty in her eyes. They shone with conviction and unwavering confidence.

"Now don't freak out, you did ask me to consider and to decide -"

"To take your _life_?"

"To _make_ my life." Annoyance flared across her features. "I want to be with you – always. I want to be like you."

"You want to be a monster." Horror warred with gladness. It was what I both dreaded and desperately desired. My life was dictated by dichotomy. "You don't understand."

"You don't think I understand?" Her exasperation was escalating, and I looked at her in surprise. She stalked up to me, glaring into my face. "Oh, I understand, Edward. I do. I lived with a vampire, remember? I know the stories, the legends, the trials and tribulations. And I know you. I'd be getting you, and that's so much more than I could ever give up."

"You'd be giving up your life, Bella, your soul – for eternal damnation."

"I don't believe that." She shook her head stubbornly. "You don't believe that, either. I'd be getting everything I've ever wished for, everything I've ever desired. You can give me that, Edward. Only you can give me that."

I gripped her shoulders, forcing my hands to be gentle. "We could go somewhere together, Bella. Anywhere. You could stay human. Or I could just…just leave." She flinched. "Bella, I don't want you to suffer for one second because of me."

She broke free of my hands and took a step away, turning her back to me. "Not suffer?" A sob broke though her voice, and I took an involuntary step toward her, raising my hand to hover between us. "Not _suffer_?"

"Bella," I began miserably. "I want you to live the happy, human life you had before you met me, met Phil. That's what you deserve. You deserve a life."

"Shut up, Edward," she broke in furiously, spinning to face me. Her eyes blazed, her small hands clenched into fists at her side. "Just shut up for once and listen to me."

She stalked across the short distance separating us, stopping right in front of me. "I've been miserable my whole life, waiting for something – waiting not to be lonely anymore. I've been waiting for life to make sense. I've been waiting for _you_." She hit my hard chest, letting out another harsh sob. I brought my arms up instinctively to comfort her, and then lowered them cautiously.

"Do you remember that first day, Edward? At the café?" She looked up into my face, and I nodded slowly. _As if I could ever forget._

"I was just going along with the motions of living, like I did every day – every single damn day of my life. And then I looked up and saw you sitting at that table. I realized _you_ are why I'm here. You are why I've been wandering for so long, why it felt right to settle for a while in Paris, of all places. You are what I've been waiting for. I've been waiting my entire life for you to find me." She looked at where her hands had fisted unconsciously in my shirt, holding on for dear life. "All of a sudden, I was alive. I wasn't lonely anymore. I was happy and I hadn't even actually met you." Her voice broke. She closed her eyes and swallowed.

"And then you were gone. Some guy grabbed you and dragged you away from me before I could even begin to process what had happened. Do you know I ran out after you? I ran out to the curb when they put you in that cab. I tried to follow. How could I let you go without knowing if I'd ever see you again, after waiting for _so long_?" She shook her head. "Oh, God, I wanted to die. To have what I'd been searching for my whole life right in front of me, and then disappear without a trace… I was devastated. I was destroyed. I sat on the sidewalk in front of the café and cried until someone came out and asked if I was okay. I wasn't." She looked up at me again, and I wanted to shout in protest at the pain I saw on her delicate features.

"I spent hours at my flat calling hospitals and doctor's offices. I wanted to be sure you were okay. I wanted to be sure I could find you again. I just needed to see you – to be sure what I felt in those few moments in the café had been real – that you'd been real. I thought I was losing my mind, but then I'd see your face in my head, and I just knew. I knew you, Edward. I knew you then, and I know you now. Please don't think I don't know what I feel or what I want. Please, don't make me go back to the hell I was living in before you found me."

I shut my eyes, tipping my head back. I couldn't bear to hear her plead with me. I'd do anything, give her anything, did she not realize? But this...my internal conflict raged. "So you want me to condemn you to a different kind of hell, is that right?"

She put her warm hands on my cheeks, tilting my head back down to meet her eyes. "Don't you understand, Edward?" she said quietly, and there was sadness, amusement, and understanding in her deep brown eyes. "Hell is wherever you are not. Hell was the loneliness and solitude I suffered until I met you. Hell was merely existing, knowing there was some part of me out there I couldn't find. And then you did find me. You saved me. You brought me to life."

"And now you want me to take it away from you."

"You're not listening! You're so used to thinking you're right all the time. Damn it, quit being so self-righteous, Edward! Listen to me! Give me credit for knowing myself. I don't want you to take anything from me! Not my life, not my love, and definitely not yourself. Don't you see you'd be giving me everything – everything I want? Everything I need." Her eyes searched mine, and her fingers stroked my cheeks.

"Please, Edward," she implored softly, and it was torture. "Please. Don't send me back to that living hell. If you leave me, I don't know if I could survive like that again, knowing for certain you are out there somewhere. I know you feel the same. Please. I want you – forever. Don't ask me to let you go."

"Bella," I choked, and she stepped in closer to me. "I don't want to hurt you, in any way. It tortures me, knowing I will." She shook her head frantically, but I stilled her by hesitantly placing the very tips of my fingers on her face. "Even now your blood burns me, my body aches for yours. But I am terrified to touch you. I couldn't bear it if you were hurt because of me." I swallowed. "Because of what I am."

"You won't hurt me," she said, a smile trembling on her lips. "Only if you leave. Edward, I couldn't…I couldn't…stand it if you leave. Please. Don't."

"Bella," I whispered softly, and her name was a curse, a vow, a promise. I went down in defeat for the first time in my existence. "I don't have the strength it would take to leave you. I love you," I murmured, pressing my mouth to her throat. The compulsion was there to bite, but not to feed.

She let out a soft cry, wrapping her arms around my neck. I pressed my cheek to the top of her chest, her body bent over my arm. "I love you, Bella, and I vow – I will try with everything in me not to hurt you, and to keep you safe. I want to keep you with me forever." The admission came from nowhere. I hadn't intended to admit it to her, and while I had been wrestling with the possibility deep in the most secret part of me, I was only just now beginning to realize that it might be what she truly wanted, as well.

She began sobbing, and I picked her up in my arms, searching her face. "What, love? Don't cry, please."

"I can't help it!" she sniffled. I carried her over to the sofa to sit with her on my lap. My fingers brushed her wet cheeks. "You love me." She linked her arms around my neck again and buried her face in my chest.

"Shh, shh," I soothed, completely lost, rocking her in my lap. "Of course, I do. I told you that before."

She sat up, wiping her face and laughing unsteadily. "I know. I love you, too. It's just so hard to believe you feel the same."

"Silly Bella." I smiled at her, wiping the wet trails her fingers missed. "You have changed my world, my being. I will never be the same, and I am only thankful for that. You brought light into my world. You brought me back to life. You talk about your miserable existence, but it is nothing compared to mine." I grew more serious. "It's nothing compared to what I have done. Bella, you need to understand, the things I've seen, that I've done myself, the horrible -"

She opened her mouth to interrupt, but I shook my head decisively, meeting her eyes with miserable guilt. She deserved to know everything, what I was and what I'd done. What kind of monster she was entrusting her life to.

"Bella, I'm not Phil. I am no tame, vegetarian creature – I haven't been, not by a long shot, not for many, many years. I embraced my vampiric nature, all it entails, and I never looked back. I've killed people, Bella. I've killed humans without a second thought, without any other worry than satisfying my hunger, my own selfish desires."

"That's not true," she murmured, not taking her eyes from mine.

"It is – it's the truth of what I am, who I am."

"It isn't," she insisted, and I ground my jaw in frustration. "Edward, you made a commitment to surviving only on animals when you were first changed, and you've reaffirmed that commitment now, haven't you? And when you didn't, you still worried about the innocents. You still considered who and what those people were, before you…fed. You left the innocents, only considered those who had committed evil acts, right? That's not a monster, Edward. That's not a lack of conscience. Just…misguided?"

"I was playing God," I admitted softly, wretchedly. "I'm not God, Bella, and only a monster would think he was, even for an instant.

"Shh." It was her turn to soothe me. "I see you, Edward. I see who you are. I see your soul, and it is bright and beautiful. If it wasn't, you wouldn't have considered changing your habits at all."

I was amazed at her convoluted logic and her confidence – her faith in me. I hoped desperately that it would never waver. "It's you, Bella," I admitted. "You've shattered my world, made me question who I am – who I have been. You've made me realize I don't want to be a monster, that perhaps there is something inside me that can be good enough for you."

A fire lit in her eyes, and she bit her lower lip. Desire – a multitude of desire – shot through me, and I gripped my control with everything I had. Her gaze flickered down to my mouth before returning to my eyes. Even though I couldn't read her mind, I certainly knew my Bella well enough to know what she was thinking. Her eyes met mine with determination and question, and she slowly, slowly leaned in toward me. She was giving me time to adjust, to see if I could accept her nearness, to see if I would reject her.

I couldn't, not if my life – or hers – depended on it. I'd been waiting lifetimes for her, to feel her. I held perfectly still as she placed her mouth softly on mine, hesitantly, and then with gentle purpose. She pulled a breath away, murmuring my name. My lips were trembling with desire and in an effort to control myself. I was being bombarded with too many intense sensations – her scent filled my nostrils, both her blood and her body, and I reacted on both those levels. It doubled the animalistic urges, making control twice as difficult to maintain. But I could and I did, for her – for both of us.

She kissed me again sweetly, and shifted in even closer. I could feel her thighs brush against mine, her breasts press slightly into my chest. I reached out, tenderly cupping her face in my hands as I had longed to do since the first moment I met her. "Bella," I whispered.

Her beautiful eyes blinked open and stared into mine in excitement and wonder. "Oh God, Edward, you taste so _good_," she moaned, and it almost brought me to my knees.

"Bella, I need to tell you, we need to talk -" Her hands fisted in my hair, trying to force my head back to hers. "Bella," I said with only slightly more firmness.

"Can't we talk later?" she asked, and I pressed my lips to hers very briefly.

"Bella, I need you to understand. I think I have control…I think I can do this…"

"I know you can," she said softly, and there was no mistaking the conviction in her voice.

"I know you do, sweetheart, but you can't comprehend how hard it is – how close I am all the time. Bella, you must promise me, promise on everything you hold dear, that if I tell you to go you will, without any hesitation or question." She opened her mouth to protest, but I broke in before she could speak. "I'm not saying I'll send you away from me for good, but if my control starts to slip, I think I can hold on until you are away, safe, so I can't hurt you. You have to promise me, Bella. It's the only way I can do this. I have to know you'll help me. I have to know I am doing everything I can to not…hurt you."

"But -"

I closed my eyes and held her to me. "I know, and I will – we will – eventually. But not right now." I couldn't risk changing her here. I needed to prepare, to do everything in my power to make sure she was safe. She needed to prepare as well.

Understanding registered on her face. "Of course, Edward. I promise. I don't want to make this any harder on you. I hate that it's so difficult for you to be near me, I hate that my blood makes you so uncomfortable."

I couldn't stop the wry smile from twisting my mouth. Uncomfortable was such an understatement, I don't think there was a classification for the word. Her fingers lightly traced my eyebrow, trailing to my temple and ear before tangling once again in my hair. "Kiss me, Edward," she demanded, and it was the most thrilling thing I had ever heard.

I lowered my head and slowly rubbed my lips along hers. Her taste…oh, God, her _taste_…She gasped, and I pulled slightly back only to return in an instant. I took her lower lip between mine, pulling on it tenderly before trailing my lips along her jaw. She moaned and tipped her head back, and I steeled my resolve. Carefully, oh so carefully, I ran my slightly parted mouth along that long, smooth, tempting column. Rivers of fire burned through me, but all I could think of now was pleasure, both hers and mine. I flicked my cool tongue out for one small, delicious lick, and her flavor exploded inside me. All I wanted was her – not her blood, but her. I trailed my nose along the other side of her throat and exulted in the knowledge. She turned her head to meet my mouth, and I kissed her in triumph. Her hands came up to clutch in my hair again, her mouth opening on mine.

Instantly, I was across the room. I stared at her, my victory from moments ago turned to despair at the look of shock on her face. "Edward," she gasped, her hand over her heart. "What -"

"I'm sorry," I said miserably. "I can't…I mean, we can't…"

"What?" she repeated. "What did I do?"

I was back at her side in an instant, stroking her hair. "No, it's not you, Bella. It's just that you can't get close to my teeth or the venom in my mouth. The slightest touch of my teeth will cut you. They're sharper than razors. If there's a tear in your skin that close to my mouth, my venom will enter your system. It would be unbelievably painful, and we're not ready quite yet. My control isn't anywhere near strong enough to resist the sight or scent of your spilling blood, no matter the amount. I have to be certain I have the strength, so I don't…hurt you."

What was I thinking, risking her life for momentary, bodily pleasure? It was the most irresponsible thing I had ever considered. I was a fool to -

"Edward," her voice broke into my self-castigating thoughts. "I can tell you're beating yourself up about this." I snorted, but she continued determinedly. "You have to stop doing that. We'll set boundaries; we can live with boundaries."

I snorted again at the irony of her words. She smiled and moved against me, resting her head on my chest and wrapping her arms around my waist. I slowly put my arms around her shoulders, exerting gentle pressure to hold her close. My eyes shut in thankfulness for this gift as I pressed my cheek to the top of her head.

"I love you, Edward," she murmured. "We'll figure this out. Together."

It was everything I could do not to crush her delicate form to me. She loved me. She'd said it before, but now I believed her. I gritted my teeth as a wave of wicked pleasure rushed through me. "You are my entire world, Bella."

It would be cruel for me to say that I didn't deserve her love, and belittle her feelings to tell her it changed none of the very real problems facing us. I couldn't hurt her so deliberately. So I held on to her and let the happiness of having her finally in my arms wash over me. It was an alien feeling, but I welcomed it for all of its strangeness. I wanted to feel her against me for as long as she would allow.

Eventually she lifted her head with a small smile. "So," she began, and I watched her expressive face curiously. "Is your venom only in your…mouth?"

If my face could ever imitate her fiery blush, it would do so now. "Um…er…how do you mean?"

She grinned wickedly, her arms still around my waist. "Hmm, I've never heard you stutter, Edward. I'll take that as a no?"

"Bella," I began warningly.

"So, say, I can bite you," her teeth nipped at my chin, "and lick you," her tongue swiped at the small spot, "mmm, and touch you here." Her hands came up to sweep along my collarbone and shoulders before pressing down along my chest. My marble skin actually tingled at the contact. I couldn't remember anyone ever touching me so much or so intimately. "But what about…here?" Her hand brushed down my stomach to the front of my pants.

I shuddered and manacled her wrist in an inescapable grip. She just grinned. "Venom," I told her succinctly, and was vaguely pleased when her cocky look changed to wonder.

"Really?" she asked.

"Really," I assured her. "So no kissing there, either," came unbidden out of my mouth.

Hers opened and closed like a fish, and I felt a curl of amusement. Then a look of intrigue and determination crossed her features, and I knew I was in trouble. Her features cleared suddenly as she lifted her arm to bring my hand, still wrapped around her wrist, to her mouth.

"So what about you?"

"Me, what?" I asked, confused.

"So you obviously can't bite. But you can…lick. No broken skin," she added quickly when I gulped. "And you can touch. Right?" Her brown eyes dared me. "I don't have any venom you need to worry about, Edward."

"No," I said lowly, bringing her body against mine. "But you intoxicate me." I kissed her forehead. "Your blood." I nuzzled under her jaw and flicked my tongue behind her ear. "Your skin." I nipped the skin on the back of her neck at her hairline with my lips. She almost jolted out of my arms, but I held on to her. "Your body most of all." I straightened, bringing one hand up to trail from the hollow at the base of her throat, down between her lovely breasts, to her waist.

I could do this. I'd spent decades involuntarily listening to and seeing all sorts of intimate acts in my head. I'd felt distant, almost mechanical desire, through others, through their thoughts. I'd never felt anything like this, however – the heat, the compulsion, the _want_ roaring through me, here, with this woman. I knew there was no way I could make love to her as every long dormant, but now awakened, sexual instinct urged me to do, but I knew there were other ways to satisfy the driving need coursing through us both. That primitive demand almost completely overrode the temptation of her blood. I picked her up, wrapping my arms around her to carry her into my bedroom.

She was heavy-lidded and panting slightly between parted lips. I absorbed the sight of this exquisite girl in my arms, feeling a primitive bolt of possession and satisfaction. I had never touched anyone with such intimacy, let alone been touched myself, and I was fiercely glad I could bring her pleasure. I took stock of the control I held over both my bloodlust and sexual lust, and assured myself it was firmly in place for the moment. I slowly lowered her to the bed, leaning over her, placing both hands on either side of her waist and slowly gliding them up under her sweater along her bare skin. She was so warm and soft, and I felt her hips press to mine in reflex. My hands flew to the zipper on her sweater and had it halfway undone in less than a blink of an eye. She gasped as cool air touched her, and I marveled at the expanse of her creamy skin. It was slightly flushed and covered in blood red lace.

"Holy Hell," I moaned. This was not good. This was splendid. My hands dipped into the opening of her sweater and slid around her ribcage. I paused, checking my control again, and felt that it was sufficiently strong enough to bring my hands together under her breasts. I pressed upward, plumping that beautiful, succulent flesh as I gently, gently ran my thumbs over her nipples. She gasped, and I could smell her arousal, hear her heart speed and sense the tension in her body. I bent down and with great care placed my lips against the smooth, delicate flesh swelling over the top of that red lace.

"Edward," she choked out, gripping my biceps. She threw her head back to expose the long line of her throat in yearning and submission.

"So lovely," I breathed against her, running my cool tongue along the exaggerated upper curves of her breasts before trailing it down the tight valley my hold created between them. I breathed chilly air across her, and she shivered, her heart racing. I knew it wasn't from the cold of my being. I circled just the tip of my tongue around the peak of her breast through the scarlet lace, and she yanked on my hair in appreciation. I smiled, giving her nipple a firm lap before pressing the flat of my tongue to her, hard. She whimpered and writhed in my gentle hold, so I gave the other breast the same attention. God, I wanted her so badly!

I straightened, pulling her with me, smiling reassuringly at her dazed expression. My hands came up to fully cover her breasts. "I want to see you, Bella. Can you do that for me?"

"S-S-See me?" she stuttered.

"Yes." I completely unzipped the sweater, spreading it open and gliding my hands up her flesh. I pushed the garment off her shoulders and down her arms.

She stared at me for a second before pulling her arms out of the sleeves and letting it drop to the floor at our feet. I took a couple of slow steps back, and her hands fluttered to her belly. She was breathtaking, the crimson bra erotically beautiful against her pale flesh.

"Bella," I murmured. "The rest, please."

She took a deep breath, her hands gliding up to the front closure of that red fantasy. She paused, though, cocking her head at me. "You first."

I looked at her inquiringly, and she gestured at me. "Your turn. Your shirt, Edward. Off." She lifted a brow teasingly at me.

Less than a quarter of a second later my shirt materialized on the floor, and she stared at it in shock. She raised her eyes to me, and her breath caught. "Oh," she breathed, staring wide-eyed at my chest. Her hand reached up to hover over my hard skin, and I ached for her touch. She hesitantly brushed her finger along one arched muscle of my shoulder. Her breath hitched again. "Oh, Edward, I…"

I closed my eyes briefly as she pressed both hands to my hard stomach, dipping one thumb into my navel and running them together up the line of my ribs. She parted her hands at the center of my chest to continue around my pectorals, up to my throat, and then back down across the wide swell of muscle to my flat nipples. She leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to my bare sternum, and I shivered.

"You're so beautiful," she said so softly only a vampire could hear her words. She took another deep breath and stepped back. She smiled a siren's smile as her hands went once more to the front closure of her bra. She flicked it open with a deft twist of her fingers, and the weight of her breasts pulled it apart as she dropped her arms. The lacy material clung until she gave the sexiest shrug of her upper body, and the cups fell away, framing her beautiful breasts.

Physical desire roared through my body. I'd never felt the like. It was so similar, yet so different, than my craving for her blood. My hands clenched and unclenched at my side as I tried to maintain a semblance of civility. Bella's eyes watched that tell-tale motion, and a sultry, satisfied look crept into her eyes.

"You doing okay there, Champ?" she murmured teasingly.

I had to take a second to make sure my voice didn't tremble. "The rest, Bella," I managed, but barely.

She smiled at me, pulling a strap down one shoulder, shimmying it off, and then doing the same to the other. The movement did amazing and wonderful things to her breasts. She brought her hands together underneath them, cupping for a brief second, and then trailed her fingers down along her skin to the button of her jeans. My eyes were glued to the movement; I was helpless to tear them away. She slipped the button loose and slowly lowered the zipper. She hitched her hips to one side and then the other, continuing the slow sway as she lowered them to her ankles and kicked them away.

I hadn't needed air in almost a century, but I gulped a lungful in desperation. It only brought her aroused and delicious scent slashing viciously through me. For the love of all that was holy, her panties matched her bra. I backed up until I hit the edge of the bed and sat down hard. The frame groaned warningly.

"Come here," I rasped, and she closed the distance between us, stopping between my legs and running her hands over my bare shoulders. I slowly leaned back so I was lying on the bed with my feet on the floor, locking my eyes on hers. "Up," I commanded, rubbing my hand along my ridged abdomen, just above the waistband of my pants.

She leaned slightly over to one side, hooking her thumb in the elastic of her panties to pull them down her legs. "No!" I protested frantically, raising my torso up to grab her wrist and stop her. "For God's sake, leave them on!" I wanted that extra barrier between her and my venom, and seeing her naked except for that small scrap of scarlet lace was the best kind of torture.

She paused, startled, and then smiled and crawled up my body. I allowed her to push me back into the mattress as she straddled my hips. She slowly lowered her moist heat to cover my now rock hard cock, and I moaned, stifling the urge to thrust up against her. _Ahhh, yes…._

She gave a little wiggle of pleasure, and I shivered. She leaned forward, her hair spreading over me, placing warm, wet kisses across my chest. I flexed my hands, setting them lightly on her hips. I could not grip, I could not grab, I could not grind her against me as every instinct in my body shouted for me to do. I let the very tips of my fingers brush suggestively along her soft skin and pebbled tips of her breasts before reaching over my head to grip the iron bedpost with both hands. I drew another deep breath. I would hold on to my control no matter what the cost. No price was too high for the incredible pleasure she was sharing with me.

Her tongue came out to lick and lap down my stomach, her body arching as she kept our hips glued together. She straightened in a fluid movement as she slid her pelvis forward, a long, slow drag up the length of my covered erection, and then jerked quickly backward, almost bringing me off the bed. _Control, Edward_, I warned myself. I had to maintain control or else bring this to an end so as not to hurt her, but I had enough awareness left in me to handle this yet. She continued her slow, hot, damp thrusts, rocking her sensitive flesh against mine, trying to get enough sensation and stimulation through the barrier of our remaining clothes. I moaned in bliss.

"Okay?" she asked breathlessly.

"Okay," I grunted, lifting my hips slowly, holding on to the ragged edges of my control, seeking more of her heat. I gripped the iron post harder. "Like that…Ahh, just like that."

She tilted her head to the side with a dreamy smile, shutting her eyes and letting that marvelous hair swirl around her naked shoulders. I watched in awe as she thrust and slid her hips against me, riding me, rubbing herself along my iron hard shaft to her pleasure. Even with the barriers of my pants and her panties I could feel her; sense the wetness gathering and tissues swelling. Her movements increased in speed and became jerky, her breath catching and exhaling in quick, sharp gasps. I watched in fascination as her lips parted and pouted open, tension pulling her brows together, making her toss her head. I pushed carefully up with my hips again, pressing into the heat of her, feeling the jolts of exquisite, unfamiliar pleasure wrack my body. She moaned, grinding down onto me, her hips pressing and rotating, mindlessly seeking. Her hands ran up and down my chest, her fingers digging into the hardness of my flesh, and she writhed on top of me with uneven breaths. Her spine arched back at an alarming angle while her slim form shuddered, her hands tensing into claws on my skin, her body a sinuous flow of beauty and rapture. I watched in awe and agony as she climaxed above me, exquisite in her glory, her triumph, her orgasm. My lifeless heart soared as she finally collapsed forward onto my bare chest with a soft sob.

I gritted my teeth, swelled to enormous and painful proportions underneath her, but I stroked my hands gently along her back, placing a tender kiss to her quivering lips. "Bella?" I asked in the softest tone I could manage.

She sobbed again, lifting her head and looking at me, her eyes spinning and unfocused. I twitched involuntarily against her. "Good God, Edward."

I smiled tersely. She was okay, but I wasn't. I gently slid her to my side and turned toward her. She blinked at me dazedly, and I grimaced as I put a bit of space between us, reaching down to my aching cock. With a couple of violent, hard jerks I came with a shout, pulsing and twitching in my pants. I lay there, shuddering and gasping, inhaling both our scents. I knew there was only one thing in existence that would compare to seeing her come, and coming myself next to her. It was not drinking her blood; it was being inside her.

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**I have a thread on Twilighted now - I know, crazy, right? - thanks to Sarahsumbrella for settin' me up. Come play with me on the thread for Tangled Web on Twilighted http:/www(.)twilighted(.)net/forum/viewtopic(.)php?f=33&t=7172**

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**I've gotten such amazing questions and comments through reviews and PMs - I hope we can chat and share them all in a fun format. I'll be dropping in regularly, answering questions, laughing, giving hints, chatting, discussing what I've got coming up next, outtakes, additions, teasers, pretty much anything that comes up. Come say hi!**


	14. Chapter 13: Prove That Warm Affection

**SMeyer owns a whole lot of stuff now, I bet, including the Twilight universe. Me, quite a lot less.**

**cyber-sarah and silentnc - what can I say that shows my thanks? Thanks! Any residual errors here are purely mine.**

**Thanks to u2shay, who has rec'd this story and been so supportive - I've heard from a number of folks who said you sent them over. You'd get a gold star Pimp merit badge, if I had one...**

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**CHAPTER THIRTEEN: Prove That Warm Affection**

I held her while she slept, wrapping my arms around her frail shoulders. She rubbed her face against my chest like a well-satisfied cat. The heat of the room helped with my wintery coldness against her, but I was careful to monitor her temperature so as not to cause her too deep of a chill. Every time I shifted or tried to move her from my cold skin, she would snuffle and frown in dissatisfaction and try to burrow closer. I finally realized I was denying us both what we wanted, so I let her press along the length of my body.

And I was. Or at least I had been – denying what we both wanted. And that was each other, for eternity. I knew it was abhorrent and selfish, the worst possible decision she could make…but it was my deepest, darkest desire. I knew it was the only way she could truly be safe from the Volturi, from me, and from herself. If she was an indestructible vampire nothing could harm her and nothing could take her from me. Nothing could separate us. It was a terrible solution to an even more horrific problem, but it was somehow exactly what she wanted. I was doing her fine and brilliant mind a disservice by doubting that, but it went against everything in me to hurt her, to take away that which we all most cherished – our human lives.

She had given me everything, and it felt like all I was doing to her was taking. She had given me freedom from eons of ennui. She had given me love. She had given me hope. She had made me see that there really was something in me that might be of value, something that might be worth existing for day after day. She had given me desire in a multitude of ways, and I was so humbled and grateful for her gift. She made me see that there may be a purpose to my continued existence, a purpose that I had not seen or felt since Carlisle changed me. Even if that purpose was only to keep her well and safe, it was the greatest gift of all, other than her love. I would spend all the rest of my days trying to be worthy of her trust and devotion.

"Edward." Her soft moan brought me out of my realizations and musings. I stroked her shiny mahogany hair, tipping my head to look into her sleeping face.

"Edward," she repeated, and I pressed my frosty lips to her forehead. She sighed, inhaling deeply, and a soft smile spread across her peaceful features. "Mmm."

A short while later, I could tell by her increased heart rate and rush of blood through her system that she was awake.

"You've been calling my name in your sleep," I informed her with only a trace of smugness. She shifted and then stilled almost instantly, but I detected the slight movement.

"Oh, Mike, Mike," she groaned exaggeratedly, and I pinched her butt gently in retaliation – or so I thought.

She squealed, slapping a hand over the offended area, her eyes flying open to stare at me in accusation. "Ow, dammit!"

"Don't tease," I admonished her, and placed my cool fingertips over the area in apology.

"I'm sorry." She grinned with no hint of remorse, sliding her arms around my neck. She wiggled, which brought her beautiful, bare breasts forward to press into my chest. "What time is it?"

"Late," I told her, tilting my head down to kiss her. "Or early." There was another lingering brush of lips. Her hands fisted in my hair at the nape of my neck, and it was heaven. "Bella."

"Edward."

Her eyes were half-closed and she was staring at my mouth. The tip of her little pink tongue came out to touch her bottom lip, and I couldn't stop myself from placing another caress on her lips or letting my fingers trail down her alabaster skin. I felt and saw the unsteady throb of her pulse in her throat. From there I stroked the delicate curve of her collarbone, tracing the faint blue veins that showed through the translucent flesh of her full breasts. She moaned, pressing harder against me, trying to make contact with my hips. I pushed her lower body away slightly, sliding down to press my icy tongue to one nipple. She hissed and clutched at my head with a shocked cry. I did the same to the other, quickly, wanting her so badly, but terrified to let so much of my venom near her skin.

"Again. Please," she whimpered, and I stroked the melting, supple flesh with my fingers. She moaned, arching toward me, and I could _smell_ her.

One hand stayed to worship her breasts while I passed the other teasingly over her torso, searching out her ribs, her bellybutton, the jut of her hipbones, all the while making sure my touch was light and oh so gentle. She squirmed, making noises in the back of her throat as my fingertips brushed across the top of the lace panties riding low across the slight curve of her belly. I hesitated briefly before slipping one finger between the material and her soft, yielding flesh. She moaned, a thick, guttural sound, as I found the hot, wet, swollen folds and let my finger part them. A yelp burst from her, and she clutched my shoulders, almost coming off of the bed when I tapped lightly on her clit. I let my lips linger between her breasts, feeling the thundering beat of her heart surge against my mouth as just the tip of my finger eased down to her entrance to hover and circle. I brushed the swollen bud of her clitoris with my thumb now, pressing rhythmically with the gentlest of pressure. Licking the velvet skin of her breast, I took the hard, round nipple between my lips and flicked it quickly with my tongue. I was hyper-aware of my strength, firmly holding onto my control as she came apart, shuddering and shouting, drenching my hand with her release. I cupped the rest of my fingers over her, rubbing and stroking until she calmed.

I looked up at her flushed face, feeling the now familiar conflict wage through me – hunger, desire, and love. She peered back at me through her disheveled hair – she'd done quite a lot of head tossing – and reached to cup my face. "I love you, Edward. Thank you."

"You're thanking me?" I teased, sliding back up to lay my head on the pillow next to her, never taking my hungry eyes from her flushed face.

She bit her lip, and I almost moaned. "I know how hard this is for you. I hate knowing how hard this is for you."

"This is what's hard," I joked, reaching down to brush my raging erection.

She rolled her eyes and smacked my chest. "That is so incredibly lame, Cullen."

I quirked a half smile in agreement, but my hand lingered between my legs. She chewed her lip again, staring at me, and I could see the resolve form on her face before she suddenly reached out and covered my hand with hers. I yelped and jerked back.

"What are you doing?" I demanded.

She still had that determined look on her face, which I recognized as not boding well for me. "I want to make you feel good, too. I want make you feel as good as you make me feel."

"What?" I asked, not making any sense of her words, but that could be because all thought and sensation was currently focused below my waist.

Her fingers slid along my hand to the fastening of the pants I still wore. She struggled with the button and zipper, and I froze, warring yet again with conflicting desires. I didn't want any part of her so near my potent venom, but the feel of her hands and fingers brushing against my raging, swollen cock was so damn good. Beyond good. Persuasive, in fact. Her small hands pushed the offensive material down over my hips and I lifted slightly as my thin boxer brief followed to mid thigh. I was bare before her, and the sensation of cool air where it hadn't been before brought the awareness of danger surging through the temptation that fogged my mind.

"I want to make you feel good, too." Her voice was low, hypnotic. She reached for me again, scooting closer, touching exposed, intimate flesh. I manacled her wrist.

"No," I said firmly and "shh!" when she would have protested. "You can't be that close to my venom yet, Bella."

"But -"

"Shh," I repeated, reaching down and angling her thighs away from mine. I trailed my hand from her hip, across the sheets, to my erection. "Just kiss me."

Her eyes flickered down to where I was firmly stroking myself and widened. She stared unabashedly, her gaze flying to my half-embarrassed, half- amused expression briefly before devoting her fascinated concentration to my hand pumping up and down my shaft. She licked her lips, and I moaned.

"Bella, kiss me," I repeated.

"But I -"

"Kiss me."

Her hands flew to my face, cupping my cheeks and pressing her mouth firmly to mine, nibbling with her lips, sucking gently on the corners. I pulled back slightly with a groan.

"That is the sexiest damn thing I have ever seen," she breathed against my mouth, kissing me again desperately before leaning back to watch as I thrust and rocked into my hand.

She caressed my chest as she stared, leaning forward, curling toward my body as I grunted with the sensation. Her panting breaths were loud in the room as I pressed my lips to the top of her head and finally came in hard, wracking spurts. I moaned, shaking like an animal, and felt her hot little mouth peppering kisses all along my chest. She pulled back slightly, her wide-eyed look of surprise making me glance down in apprehension. My venom pooled across my wrist and hand on my abdomen, swirling and translucent, before it evaporated in a muted kaleidoscope of opalescent color.

She looked at me, wide-eyed, and I shrugged in self-consciousness.

"That was beautiful," she whispered in awe. "You were beautiful." Her hand traced along my cheek before she pressed her lips sweetly against mine. "I can't wait to do that to you myself."

I shuddered. Jesus, neither could I.

I kicked the trousers the rest of the way off of my legs, and we lazed together in bed for a while. We talked about nothing significant, just enjoying being intimate, touching and caressing, skin against skin, content at being able to be close to one another. When I heard the anxious gurgling of her stomach I urged her out of bed, intending to make her breakfast. My human needed sustenance of a different kind. She pouted but agreed, sliding out of bed and casting a mischievous look over her shoulder. She was breathtaking.

"I'll just shower," she said, all innocence, and I narrowed my eyes as I sat up to watch her walk across the room to the bathroom.

She twitched her hips, swinging her hair along her naked back, emphasizing the smooth, bare expanse. She paused in the bathroom doorway, sneaking another peek at me, and hooked her fingers in the red lace to drop her panties in the threshold. She stretched, nude and glorious, reaching her arms up over her head and twisting like a sinuous cat before taking one last glance at me from under her lashes and sauntering into the bathroom. I lunged up out of the bed, darting across the room at a speed impossible for human eyes to see, and was behind her before she reached the shower.

She squeaked in surprise as I laughed warmly into her ear, curling and pressing my frigid body all along her shorter length. She squeaked again, and I reached around to turn on the water, rubbing her arms slowly.

"Tease," I murmured softly, letting my tongue trace the lobe of her ear and around the tiny, curving shell. She hummed and let me guide her under the warm spray.

She was the cleanest human on earth when I was done with her, limp, languid, and wholly satisfied when I carried her into the kitchen. Jacob was the only one of us who ate human food, and as his idea of nutrition certainly varied from most people, I didn't know what I would find. Bella sat at the breakfast bar with a silly smile, laying her head on the granite counter as she watched me search through the pantry.

"Is there anything you prefer?"

She made a humming noise, shrugged, and closed her eyes. That did not help. I opened the refrigerator and pulled out a carton of eggs. I spotted a loaf of fresh bread on the counter and placed it on the cutting board. Surely that would make an appetizing meal? I cut the bread and put it in the toaster.

"You like eggs, right?" I asked when I saw her eyes open. She sniffed the air appreciatively.

"Mm, love them. Scrambled?"

I unconsciously made a face as I beat the eggs and poured the concoction into a skillet. I heard her chuckle as she finally got off of the stool to stand next to me.

"I can make my own breakfast, Edward. Does it really smell that bad to you?"

I wrinkled my nose. "It is pretty disgusting," I admitted, backing away slightly. Her scent overrode all other aromas, and my throat burned shamefully.

"Just eggs or all food?" she asked, stirring the eggs briskly.

"Most human food," I admitted.

She lifted the wooden spoon to her mouth to taste the mess in the skillet, and I watched in somewhat horrified fascination. She chewed, closing her eyes in enjoyment while I grimaced, and I noticed her sneaking quick looks at me. She was teasing me again. I so enjoyed this lighthearted, happy Bella.

"Do you remember what kinds of food you liked when you were human?" she asked curiously, putting the eggs on a plate with the toast and filling a glass with water. She sat back on the stool at the breakfast bar and looked at me expectantly.

"No," I said slowly. "Not really. I have some faint memories of my mother cooking and laughing in a kitchen. I don't think she was very good at it, but she tried for my father and me."

"Do you remember your parents?" She paused in eating, her eyes wide and solemn on mine. "Your human parents?"

"No, not really," I said again, sitting next to her. "I remember my mother more than my father, though. Human memories fade, and it's very difficult to recall them. Vampires have photographic memories, though; we recall everything in exact detail since we were changed, but before then? Not much. Seeing photographs from that time is like looking at someone else's family photos."

She looked back at her plate, frowning and chewing thoughtfully. I caught myself shifting, wishing I knew – once again – what she was thinking.

"Do you have some old photographs? From when you were human?" she asked, pushing eggs around on her plate and not looking at me.

"Yes, a few," I told her, somewhat surprised. "We need to head back to the house in Hoquiam soon. All my personal things are there." I realized that this was true. "You're welcome to look through them when we get there."

"We're going back to Hoquiam?" she asked, now looking at me inquiringly.

I brought her hand up to my nose and rubbed it against her knuckles. "There are quite a lot of things we need to talk about before we move on. I need to explain so much to you about vampires, our society and existence, as well as the process of the change…" I realized as much as I tried to tell her already, she was basically going into this blind. She had made her decision without all of the facts and information, and my guilt threatened to swamp me.

"Edward." Her fingers stroked my eyelids, squeezed shut as I thought how unfair this all was for her. How could I even be thinking I could do this to her? How could I –

"Edward," she repeated more firmly. "Stop it. Talk to me."

"Bella," I moaned, opening my eyes and meeting her worried gaze. "I'm such a monster. How could I even be thinking about doing this to you, when you don't know…I haven't explained anything, really…"

"Details," she said firmly. "It's all just details from here, Edward. I've made my decision."

"But you don't know -"

"Then tell me," she said, throwing her arms up in frustration. "We're in this together, remember? That's the deal. _Together_. If there's something I need to know, then just frickin' tell me! You can't just keep information from me and sit and brood endlessly about it all on your own." She grabbed both of my hands in her small ones. "I mean, if I'm going to be spending the rest of eternity with you, you are really going to have to stop that, okay?"

I could only manage a half-smirk at her attempt to joke. I stared miserably at where our hands were joined. She huffed out a frustrated breath, and then bent down to try to meet my eyes.

"Look, Edward, I promise I'll tell you what I'm thinking if you can make me the same promise. If at any time anything you tell me raises doubts or questions, I promise to let you know. Okay? But you have to _tell_ me. Let's talk about it, get it out in the open. I really hate it when you get all closed up and broody – although it's pretty sexy, I have to admit, but what isn't sexy with you, really, I think that you're way too sexy for your own good, or my own good, no matter what - "

I broke off her tirade by pressing my mouth to hers, and she went limp, kissing me back, wrapping her arms around my head and pressing against me.

"Gah," she gasped as I gently untangled her arms and set her back in her seat. "What?"

I touched her nose with my fingertip. "You were giving me a well-deserved lecture on my innate broodiness and tendency to keep everything bottled up inside and not let anyone in. And you're right. It will be difficult – my unchanging nature and all," I mocked myself, "but I promise for you I will try."

"Good." She beamed at me. "Thank you. Now, I think you need to tell me why we're going back to Hoquiam, how that all came about, and what's going to happen from there."

My features instantly fell into a scowl as I thought about that big mess of a conversation. I felt her smack me upside the head, which was ridiculous, really, because all that did was hurt her hand. She shook it out and scowled back at me.

"Edward," she said warningly, raising her hand for another smack.

"No, okay!" I held up my hand. "I'm just trying to think…It's a lot of information. I don't know where to start." Explaining about my family, our complicated and strange relationships, vampires as a society, the horrifying process of changing, going through a newborn period, drinking animal blood, the ring sitting heavy in the pocket of my leather jacket across the room…I started brooding again.

She sighed, standing. "Just start with why we're going back to Hoquiam, and we'll go on from there, okay?"

"Okay," I agreed, standing with her and taking her hand. "Let's go out on the balcony, though. I could use some fresh air."

She frowned, following me as I led her to the wide, swinging doors, and I instantly felt like an ass. Her scent wasn't really bothering me – no more than usual, anyway. I sat her down on one of the large, cushioned chaise lounges, lowering myself to sit at her feet. She instantly tucked her legs up underneath her, tugging on my hands to bring me closer.

"If we're going to do this," I began, and she glared at me with narrowed eyes. I quickly amended my thought, knowing I was already off to a bad start. "All right, _when_ we do this, we need someplace safe, first of all. And I need…backup…I guess, should something happen, or you have more questions, or I do, or…just in case…" My voice trailed off miserably. I was really screwing this up.

Bella just sat patiently, holding my hands, waiting for me to get my shit together. I took a deep breath and held her scent in my lungs, letting the familiar and addictive burn settle me. I was toking on her.

"We need Carlisle. There is no one else I would trust," I finally told her, and she nodded in understanding. "And everyone else, my family, for support and protection."

"Of course," she said softly, bringing my cold fingers to her mouth. "We need to go home."

Home. Of course. That was exactly what I needed, and what she needed. I needed help – support – even I couldn't do this alone. It was time I accepted the fact that not only did I need my family, they needed to be there for me as well. I had been denying them that. It was something I was finding I was exceptionally good at.

"I need to fill you in on vampires, don't I, what we are, what we do, other than the obvious," I began, but she stopped me with a hand to my cheek.

"I know the basics, I guess," she told me, and I raised a brow. "Phil told my mom and me quite a lot, actually, once we found out what he was and started to believe him." A twitch of her lips told me that was quite a memory. "I know most of the history, and your abilities – not your unique one, but the abilities vampires have in common. Your speed, your strength, your other attributes."

"That makes it somewhat easier. We don't have a lot of time."

"When?" she asked. "When do we have to leave?"

"I'm not entirely certain. A day or two at the very most." I saw her face fall, and my chest tightened. "I'm sorry, Bella. It's so sudden. Once we're safe at home you can take all the time you want. I promised you I'd keep you safe, and I meant it. If you're not sure, if you need more time, you have it. If you change your mind -"

"Shut it, Cullen," she whispered, leaning in and kissing me gently. "I'm sure, I won't change my mind, and I won't tell you again." She settled back, trying to look stern.

"Bella," I began, but she smacked me upside the head again. I chuckled, catching her hand to place a kiss to the palm, curling her fingers around it.

"Okay, sorry," I told her, and then frowned down at our hands. "Did Phil ever talk to you about – changing? Our venom and how it works?"

"No," she replied. "He never said anything about the actual process. I didn't know vampires had venom until you told me. Don't you just suck out my blood, and then replace it or something? Make me drink yours?"

"No." I shuddered convulsively. And then I shuddered again. "Really, Bella."

"Well then?"

I released her hands to stand and pace to the balcony railing where I took a deep lungful of air before returning to sit in my previous spot. "It's…God, this is hard!" I scrubbed my hands through my hair, and felt her hand rub up and down my back. I choked back a harsh laugh. She was comforting _me_.

I turned to capture her gaze. _Truth_, I reminded myself. _I would give her only the truth_. "It's our venom that changes a human into a vampire. I'll…bite you, inject my venom into major veins that run to your heart." My finger absently traced her jugular, axillary, and drifted down to the inside of her thigh over the saphenous. "I'll inject venom from my mouth into your bloodstream." My hands started to shake at the thought. "I – I'll seal the wound with my tongue, with more venom, to keep it and your blood in. It will reach your heart almost instantly and…and it will be…ah, God, Bella, it will be painful."

I shamefully swallowed the excessive and disgusting flow of venom filling my mouth. I was a horrific, depraved fiend. I was an animal. A base, evil being. Her trembling hand covered mine where it fisted on my thigh and I forged on, willing this to be what finally sent her running and screaming from me, and at the same time willing her not to go.

"It's the most horrendous pain you will ever experience. It will paralyze you. You will feel like you are being burned alive while your heart is being crushed in your chest and you are being torn limb from limb and eviscerated." Her hand tightened on mine, and I paused. Okay, maybe too much honesty there. "Your body slowly dies, becomes stone, cold, hard, immortal, perfect. And then you wake up with the fires of hell in your throat. And that's if I don't kill you myself – if I have the control to stop once I taste your blood."

I was silent, the breath panting in and out of my lungs in agitation. There was nothing else to say. Her fingers were cold where they clutched mine.

"You do," she finally said in a hoarse voice. "You have the control. I trust you, Edward." I squeezed my eyes shut in agony at the weight of responsibility and guilt.

I could hear her chewing on her lip. "How long will I be…" she finally whispered.

"Three days," I told her, and she slid into my arms, hugging me fiercely. I concentrated on the warm, fragrant human girl in my embrace.

"You'll stay with me?" she asked in a low, shaky voice.

"Always," I declared. "I won't leave your side, not even for an instant."

"P-promise?"

I leaned back to take her precious face in my hands. I studied each dear feature, brushing my fingertips at her hairline. Her face was pale, her eyes wide, and her mouth trembled.

"I promise." I made it a vow, a solemn and binding pledge.

She nodded, her brown eyes turning liquid with tears. I gathered her to me as tight as I dared.

"I wish there was another way," I whispered into her hair, pressing my lips to her smooth temple. "I wish I was another man."

"No," she protested quietly. "No, Edward. I don't want any other man. It's you I want. If I get you in the end, for forever, that's all I want."

"I'm not worth it." I admitted my darkest fear into the soft, dark tresses as we rocked each other, swaying slowly.

She brought our almost imperceptible motion to a halt, turning to me and then getting up on her knees so she could look me in the face. She deliberately placed a hand on each of my cheeks and locked her eyes on mine.

"Yes," she said simply. "You are."

She kissed me, setting her soft lips against my marble smooth ones. I tilted my head, bringing my hands up to her nape to hold hers, and the intensity of our feelings exploded into the contact of our mouths. She sucked hard and I let her, returning the pressure press for press, but keeping my lips closed and her soft flesh away from the razor sharpness of my teeth. I leaned her back, stretching out next to her on the chaise, and our mouths met and rubbed, stroked, pressed, and joined together, again and again. Finally the desperation and intensity of our emotions eased, and I just held her, counting her heartbeats, feeling her chest rise and fall with her breaths, cherishing each and every one. We talked about vampires, about being a newborn, and all the precautions that would entail. I assured her I would look after her and not let her do anything she would regret.

"I'll be stronger than you?" she asked, looking pleased at that bit of information.

"Yes, for a little while." I smiled down at her. "But probably not faster. I'm very quick, even for my kind."

"Braggart," she admonished, but laughed.

I told her about the members of my vampire family. We spoke of practicalities and frivolous things, planning a future I had never imagined for myself before Bella. I had found my mate, the part of myself that had been missing for so long, and despite the very real trials, tribulations, and uncertainties before us, I finally felt whole.

I thought she had finally drifted into sleep when she suddenly sat up, twisting to look at me.

"Wait a minute!" she exclaimed, and I raised a brow inquiringly. "I know you told me you've been around for one hundred years, but exactly how old are you?"

I closed one eye and squinted at her with the other. "Um, how do you mean?"

She pushed at my chest in exasperation. "I mean how old are you?"

"Hm, I was born in 1901."

"1901?" she breathed in amazement, but her face hardened in that look that meant trouble. "_Exactly_ how long have you been a vampire?"

"How long?" I repeated, stalling.

"Edward…" she said warningly. She raised a fist to wag it in my face, and I laughed. "How long?"

"Just over ninety years," I admitted, grabbing her tiny fist and swallowing it in my palm.

Her eyes narrowed, and then widened in horror. "Nine – ninety years? Then you are…that makes you…" her mouth opened and closed convulsively.

"I was changed in 1918," I told her. "Just a few months before my eighteenth birthday."

"Oh, God," she breathed in a strangled voice and flopped down next to me. "OhGod ohGod ohGod. I've committed statutory rape. Oh, God, what is my Dad going to think? He's a policeman. I'm a deviant!"

I laughed and rolled over her, pinning her down. "I don't think _you're_ the deviant here," I assured her. "And my age is the last thing your dad needs to be concerned about, don't you think? Or you, for that matter."

She opened one eye to glare at me. "It's not funny. You're _seventeen_, for crying out loud. Seven-fricking-_teen_!"

"Bella," I said reasonably when she started moaning again and rolling her head back and forth on the cushion. "Do I look seventeen?"

She paused in the head rolling, opening both eyes to look at me. She examined my face, searching out each feature before dropping her gaze to my chest, exposed by my open shirt – opened by her fingers, I might add. Her gaze tracked down between my thighs, lingering there involuntarily in admiration before shooting back to my face. She was beet red, and I inhaled sharply, which was a miscalculation on my part. _Argh_.

I lowered my hips to hers. "Well," I pressed, with both my words and my body. "Do I?"

"N-no," she stammered, but her eyes started to get wild again. "But -"

"But nothing." I kissed her, effectively stopping her hysterics. I kept my mouth on hers, moving softly but with purpose, until I felt her relax beneath me. "When we are changed, our bodies, well, they perfect themselves. Become hard, strong, and as close to perfect as possible, given our particular age when we are changed."

"Mm-hm," she murmured, and I was pleased to see her eyes had gone soft and dreamy, no longer wild. Her hand brushed across my chest, down my defined abs. "Perfect. Mm-hmm."

"So," I continued, breathing my cool, fragrant breath across her cheek, smiling to myself when I heard her heart pound unsteadily. "Physically – oh!" My eyes rolled back in my head as her hand slid into my pants, over my boxer briefs. "Physically I'm more in my mid-twenties. Mentally – mm, yes – mentally…well, I have been around for more than one hundred years. So you see…_ungh_...I'm actually older than…you…are…"

"Edward," she said, leaning up and licking my neck from shoulder to ear. "Suddenly I'm not feeling so guilty after all."

"Oh? Well, good. Because you shouldn't. It's really a matter of -"

"Edward?" she interrupted. Her other hand joined the first. "Shut up, 'kay?"

I surrendered to her completely. I lay back to let her crawl on top of me where I could watch her lovely face as she took her pleasure.

"Okay."


	15. Chapter 14: Diamond Bright

**SMeyer owns Twilight, not me. Duh.**

**silentnc and Sarahsumbrella - thanks for catching my typos, errors, and reminding me not everyone lives in my head and knows what I'm thinking, and to actually write it down in the story.**

**Thank you for the reviews. It makes me tingle in a good, non-creepy way.**

* * *

**CHAPTER FOURTEEN: Diamond Bright**

Bella dozed in my arms afterward, and I let her, knowing the stress she'd been through, knowing more was to come. I woke her when I sensed Jacob and Demetri approaching the building. There was no way they were going to see her half-clothed, looking disheveled, and smelling of spent arousal.

She muttered incoherently as I picked her up, carrying her swiftly from the balcony into my bedroom. I put her on the bed as I darted around, gathering her clothes. She sat where I had placed her, swaying and blinking at me sleepily.

"It gives me a headache when you do that," she grumbled, rubbing at her forehead. "You're all blurry."

"Hmm." I couldn't help but smile at her grumpy expression as I flashed to her side. "And you're all naked. Put these on; I don't think you want Jacob and Demetri to see you like this." I frowned teasingly at her. "At least, I know I don't."

She glanced down at herself and then back up at me, alarm on her features. "Jacob and Demetri are here?"

I tipped my head toward the main room as we heard them enter the flat cautiously, knowing we were somewhere inside. She scowled at me. "That's going to take some getting used to."

I grinned, standing and buttoning my shirt before starting to tuck it into my pants. I considered what we had just been doing out on the balcony – where she had been grinding against me and what she had been grinding against me – and then went to the closet to change. When I came out she was nowhere in sight, but I heard her moving around and water running in the bathroom. A few seconds later she poked her head out of the door to whisper, "Do you see my bra anywhere?"

I turned and started looking, scowling at the juvenile snickers coming from the front room. I'd have to remind her of vampire's super-acute hearing as well as Jacob's somewhat less sensitive, but still above average range if she wanted any degree of privacy whatsoever. I found the red lace and scooped it up, carrying it to the bathroom door where I paused and tapped softly.

"Thanks," I saw a flash of red face and brown hair as one slim hand reached through the crack in the door and snatched it out of my hand. The door closed firmly in my face, and I smiled.

Moments later she reappeared, walking into the bedroom, a little nervous, her sweater and jeans back on and undergarments firmly in place. "Are they still out there?" she asked, nodding toward the closed door that led out into the main living area of the flat.

"Yes," I murmured, going to her and placing my hands lightly on her hips. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. You've met Jacob before, right? And Demetri's fairly harmless."

She bit her lip and looked up at me. "No chance we can just...umm…?" She angled her head at the wide bank of windows, and I laughed.

"I can't fly, Bella," I joked.

"Yeah, but I have no doubt you could jump or climb down, even carrying me," she returned.

I rolled my eyes at her. "Come on, it's no big deal." I took her hand and led her to the door.

She tried to shake her curtain of hair over her face, but I stopped just before the door, brushing it back and placing a light kiss on her lips. I opened the door and stepped out, smiling at Jacob and Demetri, but the smile faltered and I came to a halt. The looks on their faces changed from an initial teasing grin as they met my gaze to one of wide-eyed shock when they saw Bella. I could hear their surprise at her appearance – they hadn't been expecting her to look so…different. Both of their thoughts were fairly jumbled at this point, so I turned to her, concerned, and saw her as they did.

Her porcelain skin was rosy and flushed, her eyes heavy with satisfaction and a little apprehension. Her tousled hair was messy and perfect, her lips slightly swollen and a deep, rubbed pink. She stayed close to me in intimate contact, and the languor of her body spoke of a woman well-loved. It was pretty obvious by those tell-tale signs what we had been doing.

Christ, I wanted her again.

I whirled back to them to give my best warning glare, and their eyes shot from me, to Bella, and back to me before being drawn almost against their will back to her. I hissed between my teeth so only the two of them could hear. Demetri brought himself out of the stupor with a jerk and smacked Jacob, who was blatantly staring. He smacked him again, and Jacob finally took note of my displeasure at his rudeness.

"This is Bella," I told them with a raised brow and a warning note in my voice.

"I'm Demetri." He waved at her from where he stood behind the kitchen counter. _I've never seen a woman look so sexed up. Good job, my friend, I didn't think you had it in, uh, you_, he thought admiringly, and I glowered at him. Jacob only had _Oh Holy Wow_ going through his head. I turned my glare on him.

"Uh, um, hi," he offered, starting toward her and holding out his enormous hand. "I'm Jacob."

I put my arm around her shoulders, pulling her to my side and giving him a low growl. He stopped short, blinking, blushing, and stammering. Bella peeked at him from under my arm.

"Hi," she said softly. "I remember."

"You do?" he beamed at her, and then let his face fall from the ridiculous, sappy grin to a more normal mien at my continued growl. "Uh, okay, that's good." He took a few steps back.

"Now that you two idiots have completely embarrassed yourselves," I said, still glaring at them and hoping they got the message to pull their shit together, "we'll be going."

"Where are you off to?" Demetri asked, moving around the counter as we walked across the room toward the front door, always keeping us on the opposite side and his lower half hidden.

Bella raised her eyebrows at me in question of his strange behavior. I just shrugged and helped her on with her jacket, and then slipped into mine, shooting him a warning glare. The box in my pocket bumped heavily against my side.

"We have some things to do," I told him obscurely. It wasn't that I didn't trust him, but Aro's ability was very similar to mine, only much more powerful. He had to be touching his subject, but he could read the minds of anyone he had physical contact with – he could see everything that had ever been in their mind, past and present. I didn't want to give him any knowledge that could be used against us – or Demetri – when my friend was back in his presence.

_I've got your back_, Jacob thought, and I shook my head imperceptibly at him for the same reasons. He just smirked, and I knew his determination wouldn't waver no matter how I protested. Stubborn pup. I shook my head again in exasperation and nodded to them as Bella and I left the flat.

"Where are we going?" Bella asked. I waited until I knew we were out of earshot before answering.

"Back to your place," I told her. "You need to pack the things you want to keep and send them to the house in Hoquiam. You won't be able to keep everything, but the things that are important we should send today. We'll pack a few necessities in case we have to…well, leave in a hurry, but everything else we can send on ahead."

We stopped to purchase some boxes, and I was aware of Jacob following us and lingering out of Bella's sight. Riding in the elevator of her building with her was much easier, even with her blood and sexual scent strong and vivid. I could no more bring myself to hurt her than I could force my heart to beat – it just wasn't in me any longer. The desire for her blood was there, but it was linked with the desire for _her_, and it made the killing urge all but disappear. I still hungered for her, my throat still burned, but I knew that with a firm grip on my animal nature I could certainly control myself. I braced for the impact, but even the concentrated scent of her in her flat was bearable. She changed clothes, and we packed a small backpack with bare necessities. When we left we'd have to move fast, and I wanted to be prepared in case things didn't go exactly according to plan.

I helped her sort through her things all afternoon. I immediately put all of her books in boxes to be shipped back; they were old, worn, and well-loved and I knew she would want them with her. I learned so much about her as we packed and sorted through her things. I had an insatiable urge to know about every aspect of her life before she met me, the smallest detail. We laughed together and paused often over trinkets, her memories, and she patiently fed my interest, answered my endless questions.

She was curious, too, and we talked about my family and the house in Hoquiam as we worked side by side through the afternoon. I didn't know if we would settle there permanently. So much depended on her – how she would react to being a newborn and living in a house full of vampires. We were usually solitary creatures, rarely traveling in groups larger than two and even then it was typically only with a mate. My family's vegetarian nature somehow made it easier to belong in a group, but Bella's newborn bloodlust and temper might make it necessary to be on our own for a while. She never did anything I expected, though, so there was no way to tell. It was one of those things that would have to be addressed as it came, and although it was not in my nature to do so, I had no choice.

I detailed the varied stories of my siblings' histories and their relationships together, as well as Carlisle and Esme's. Bella was fascinated with Alice's ability to see the future and the imprecise nature of her visions due to the changing decisions of the subject.

"Have you talked to her? Did you ask her…about us?" she asked, pausing in her sorting.

I paused as well where I was going through her CD collection, keeping those I didn't have and putting the others in the charity pile. "Yes," I replied cautiously.

"Well?" she demanded impatiently.

"I saw her the other day. She said…well, she said she saw us together, but she also saw a couple of other different possibilities, depending on your – our – decisions."

"You _saw_ her? When? Where?" She came over to me and put her hand on my arm, pressing gently so I would stop and look at her.

"At the airport yesterday."

"At the airport? Yesterday?" She was parroting me in her surprise. "Why did she come to the airport? Here? In Paris? Where is she now?"

I smiled. "Yes, here in Paris. She and Carlisle came -"

"Carlisle?" She was wide-eyed with shock.

I sighed and guided her over to a chair. I put my hands on her shoulders to make her sit and she did, hands in her lap and staring at me with wide eyes. "Alice came to bring me something, and Carlisle came so we could talk about our…coming home. It wasn't a discussion either of us wanted to have over the phone."

She nodded, frowning thoughtfully. "What did Alice bring?"

Leave it to her to focus on that. I rubbed the bridge of my nose in frustration. This was not at all how I had imagined this happening, not how I wanted it to happen at all. But when – since this all began a few weeks ago and she brought me to my knees – had I any choice? When had things gone the way I wanted them to? I smiled ruefully down at her, and thrust my hand into the pocket of my jacket, fingering the small, velvet box.

"Bella," I said, and her eyes widened further at the deep tone of my voice. I knelt down on one knee before her, placing my hands over hers where they were twisting in her lap. "This isn't how I imagined this, but I want to show you something. I want you to know my…intentions. I want you to know how much I love you."

Her eyes drifted from mine to my hand as it appeared out of my pocket. I had my fingers fisted around the small box, and I turned my hand so they faced up, slowly uncurling them and exposing the black cube. She stared and stared, and then a choked gasp escaped her. Her hand flew to her mouth and she pressed the back of it against her lips, her eyes shooting up to mine. I smiled uncertainly, looking down at the box and back up at her. Another harsh noise escaped her as her eyes filled with tears. They trailed down her cheeks as she just sat there staring into my eyes, trembling and trying to still the small sounds that leaked through her fingers.

"It's not much, I don't imagine," I said softly, starting to get a bit concerned. "It's just my mother's ring – Elizabeth's ring. I've had it…all this time." I shrugged self-consciously, the box still balanced in my palm as an offering to her. "I just thought…well, I want you to have it. I want to marry you, Bella, but I want it to be perfect when I ask you. This isn't perfect, but I wanted you to know what I was thinking, what my intentions are. I love you, and -"

I broke off as she finally moved, her finger pointed and reaching out to stroke the velvet. Something twisted in my chest at the sight of the wetness on her cheeks. "We don't have to, Bella, if it isn't what you want. If you want to wait until later, until you're sure, until we've put all this behind us and you've had time to -"

She interrupted me again. I felt like I would never stop my incoherent rambling if it wasn't for her.

"Edward. Can I see it?" she breathed softly.

I opened the lid, exposing the ring nestled securely in the center. Her finger hesitantly reached out to stroke the beautiful gems and trace the delicate metal that encased them. She drew her hand back and fisted it. She looked up at me with wonder.

"It's beautiful."

I stared into her eyes. "It's yours." I meant more than the ring, and she knew it. "Do you want to try it on?"

She thrust her hands behind her back, and I frowned slightly at the gesture. "Are you _asking_ me?" she countered.

"No," I said slowly, turning my frown on the ring. "Not yet. I want it to be special, memorable, not under pressure with all this." I gestured around. "But I wanted you to know."

"Then, no," she said, shaking her head slowly but smiling up at me. Her face took on a bright, glowing light. "It's bad luck to put it on if you haven't asked, and we don't need any more of that." I smiled, agreeing with her. "But it's absolutely beautiful, and I can't imagine a more perfect ring. I can't wait to wear it."

I couldn't wait to see it on her finger, but I owed her so much more than this. "Good," I said, snapping the box closed and slipping it back into my pocket. I was heartened by the way her eyes followed it regretfully. "I love you," I told her. "And I can't wait for you to be my wife."

"Me, too," she said simply. "Your wife." She threw her head back and laughed in delight, drumming her heels against the legs of the chair with giddy abandon, and then leaned up to kiss me.

"Mmm," I hummed in appreciation. I pulled away, knowing if I lingered we would get nothing more done, and time was short. "Something else we have to plan."

She looked worried, biting her lip, and I chuckled. "Don't worry, Esme and Alice will be thrilled if you ask for their help and advice. I think this is going to make them very happy."

She nodded, still looking doubtful, and I pulled her out of the chair. "Okay, back to work."

She rubbed the box in my pocket through my jacket and grinned at me, and we went back to sorting through her things. We made short work of the rest – it helped that I didn't have to restrain myself to keep my pace at human speed.

I recruited Jacob a short while later to help carry boxes up and down the stairs and elevator. There were people on the building and on the streets, not to mention the doorman, and we had to keep up appearances – I had to regulate myself to human speed outside her apartment. Plus, I figured if he was going to be skulking around he could at least make himself useful. He grumbled and groused, but relented when Bella asked him in her sweet manner if he could save her from running up and down the stairs. She had him wrapped around her tiny little finger just like she did me.

We hauled boxes and bags to the garbage in the basement of her building, setting some aside for a local charity to come pick up along with her furniture. The last few we took down to the curb to wait for the taxi I had called, a large one with room for the boxes we were forwarding. We took them to a shipping company and sent them on to Hoquiam. The bill was quite substantial, and I laughed at her when she fretted.

"You have no idea how much money we have, Bella. I couldn't spend it all in my existence, even being immortal. Relax."

"How much do you have?" she asked, still worried.

"_We_ have. It's yours now, too, especially after we get married." Jacob's head whipped around at this, and I smirked. "A lot. An indecent amount, really. That's what happens when you have a sister who can see the future, and more time than you can imagine when you don't sleep and have no one to distract you at night," I waggled my eyebrows at her teasingly, and her frown finally lightened into a smile. "Plus, a penchant for dealing in the market doesn't hurt." I grinned at her.

"Oh." She still looked thoughtful. She'd have to get used to it. We were rich, and no mistake about it.

We went back to the apartment for one last look around, Jacob tagging along with us now that his pretense of sneakiness was no longer required. I made arrangement to sub-lease the apartment to Mr. Anthony Masen, one of my personal alternate identities that the Volturi didn't know about, until Bella's original lease was done. She would be staying with me until we left for the States the morning after next. I wouldn't let her out of my sight. I just hoped we had enough time.

Jacob was coming down the stairs as I was on my way up after finishing my business with the leasing manager. I arched a brow and tried to quell my irritation. As long as he was determined to involve himself in our little drama, I'd given him explicit instructions to not leave her alone or unobserved, ever, unless I was with her.

He just grimaced at me and continued on his way, throwing over his shoulder, "She's crying, that's your dealio," with a shudder, and dashed out of sight.

I raced up the stairs and was at her side in an instant. I could smell the salt and wet of her tears as I rushed through the door. "Bella! What's wrong?"

She turned in my arms as they came around her, burying her face in my chest.

"Nothing," she sniffed after a moment, wiping her eyes with her sleeve. "Really, nothing. It just seems so weird, packing up my whole life in just a couple of hours. I'm just so happy to be done with it and to be going with you."

I gave my head a quick, confused shake. No, I'd never understand or be able to predict her, not if we survived a million years.

"So, you're happy?"

"Yes," she wailed, burying her face in my chest again and taking huge breaths. I just held her, stroking her back until she settled. She finally lifted her face to smile up at me with a laugh, and I worried for her sanity. Or mine, for that matter. "I love you," she said warmly. "And I'm going to marry you, and keep you forever and ever."

"Amen," I finished the vow, smiling back hesitantly at her obvious delight.

"Can you gimme Hallelujah?" she chortled, letting go of my waist and doing a little dance in the empty room. I shook my head and held out my hand.

"Come on, love. Are you ready to go?"

She glided back to me, taking my hand with a wide smile and bringing my fingers to her mouth. "Yes. Yes, I am. Let's go!"

I shook my head again as we walked out into the hall. I turned to lock the door, but she took the keys from my hand.

"Let me," she said, and I handed them over. She turned the lock with a flourish and did another little dance in the hallway. "Okay," she said, face glowing. "I'm ready."

I took her hand again and we went down the stairs. I thought she'd want to take the elevator, but she said she never wanted to step foot in it ever again. I gave the key to the doorman, and we left the building. Once out on the sidewalk she spun to walk backward, facing me, and I worriedly reached out. Backwards, Bella, walking, and concrete were not a good combination.

"Let's eat, drink, and be merry!" she exclaimed, batting at my hands.

"Yeah, because what about me screams all of those things?" I asked, only half-joking.

"Oh, come on," she insisted. "Think of it as my last meal."

"That's not funny, Bella." I scowled at her.

She rolled her eyes and leaned up to kiss me. "I want merry, dammit. And eat and drink."

"All right." I could deny her nothing. I'd never seen anyone so happy to be celebrating the end of their life. "I thought you'd be sad, though, to pack up your place and be leaving?"

"Sad?" She stared at me incredulously. "No. Not sad. I've never been so lonely, waiting days, months, and years on end." She shuddered. "I never, ever thought you'd want me, that I'd be here with you, that we would be together always – that you'd want that." She stopped, still facing me. "I never want to see that place again and remember how awful it felt, waiting for you. I never want to be that lonely again. I never want to wonder if I'll ever find you. I want to be with you, Edward, you don't know how much."

I was humbled. Standing there, on the sidewalk in Paris, I was brought to my knees by this little slip of a human girl. I finally realized her feelings were the same as mine, that they ran as deep and pure. If it meant I could keep her by my side, forever, I would give my life. I would do anything to be sure I could always have this precious woman with me. The sharp agony of my doubt and guilt eased. It didn't disappear, but it eased. I understood her feelings completely.

"Bella," I murmured, opening my arms and she crashed into me, jumping up and wrapping her whole body around me. I closed my eyes and buried my face in her neck, breathing deeply and giving thanks for the small miracle I held in my arms.

**X-X-X-X-X**

We did end up going to dinner so she could enjoy eating human food in a restaurant for one of the last times. It was a highly recommended bistro, the food was reputed to be beyond excellent and the atmosphere was warm, relaxed, and intimate. She instructed me on what to order so she could sample my plate as well and asked me to pick an appropriate wine. She found my vast knowledge of wines amusing when I'd never really tasted one before. She drank almost the entire bottle and it made her smell…different. Not bad, not any less enticing, just Bella, more fruit, and the tang of alcohol.

She gorged herself on rich desserts, and I laughed along with her as she enjoyed the food, drink, and our merry-ness. No one noticed I didn't partake of the meal; no one could tell with the way she had wallowed through both of our dinners. She stroked my cold hand and leaned over the table, grinning happily at me as I waited for the check. When the waiter came to discreetly place it at my elbow, she turned her glorious smile on him and he froze.

"He's going to ask me to marry him, you know," she told the bemused young man. I eyed the level of wine in the bottle. "Marry. _Him_. Can you believe it?"

"Um, yes?" he offered tentatively, looking at me out of the corner of his eye nervously. At least someone had sense enough to me wary of me, I thought amusedly, which only grew when I heard his admiring thought. _Lucky girl. Guess I won't slip him my number in with the receipt after all._

I hid a grin behind my hand and handed him the small leather binder after tucking my AmEx in the slot. Bella examined my face curiously and leaned in closer when he walked away.

"What's so funny? Did you read his mind? What was he thinking?"

I closed the small distance between us and kissed her wine-and-chocolate flavored lips. I much preferred her natural essence. "I think it's time to get you back," I told her, and she sat back with a pout.

Demetri and Jacob had made themselves scarce for the evening. I imagined they would be using Bella's mostly empty flat, if Jacob didn't already have a previous engagement. I carried her up the stairs of the apartment. She was getting drowsy along with being tipsy, and I certainly didn't mind the feel of her warm, yielding body in my arms.

"You need to sleep," I admonished her as I carried her though the apartment to my room and lay her on the bed. She struggled to sit.

"No," she protested, blinking at me. "Don't want to waste a second."

"We're going to have lots of seconds," I told her, removing her shoes and deftly managing the fastenings of her pants. I pulled them off her slender legs and kissed each knee. "Lots and lots and lots of seconds."

"Mmm," she hummed, smiling and lying back on the comforter. "I like that."

"This?" I asked, kissing her ankles.

"That, too," she sighed. "That, and lots of seconds with you. A forever full of seconds."

I shrugged out of my jacket and shirt, gazing at the beautiful woman lying before me. My frozen, silent heart cramped and swelled with the love I felt for her. I leaned over her, easing the heavy pullover up her torso and over her head. The bra and panty set was blue tonight, and I had to remind myself she needed rest. I flashed over to the closet to pull out a shirt for her to sleep in, but she was already dead to the world by the time I got back to the bed. I gently tugged the shirt over her and lifted her carefully to place her under the blankets. I stripped down to my boxer briefs and lay on top of the comforter next to her, cocooning her in the warmth of the soft material and surrounding her with my presence as she slept.


	16. Chapter 15: Dine Upon The Fly

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, just this particular story is mine.**

**Sarahsumbrella and silentnc - my lovely, brilliant betas - I so appreciate all of your suggestions, comments and help.**

* * *

**CHAPTER FIFTEEN: Dine Upon The Fly**

Bella woke the next morning wrapped in the thick comforter like a burrito. She struggled to turn toward me and exhaled a sigh of relief when she saw me lying next to her, watching her curiously.

"Why did you let me sleep?" she demanded grumpily, and my brows rose.

"It wasn't so much _letting_ you," I replied, stroking her hair back from her face as she glared at me, "as it was not being able to stop you. I think red wine makes you sleepy."

I leaned in to kiss her pouting lips lightly, and then came back to linger. I pulled away reluctantly when her arms linked around my neck, and she struggled to free herself from the blankets to get closer.

"We have a lot to do today," I told her, not able to stop myself from stroking her cheek, touching her soft skin. "I've got tickets purchased for us leaving first thing tomorrow morning, Paris to Atlanta, and then on to Seattle. We'll drive from there to Hoquiam."

"Rent a car?" she inquired, trying to wiggle her way closer to me.

"No, my family will drop one of their cars off at the airport for us. I don't want to have to worry about getting it back or getting rid of it." Not that the Volturi wouldn't figure out where I was headed, but it didn't make sense to be stupid about it.

I kissed her again and slid out of bed so her reaching hands couldn't convince me to stay. I couldn't help leaning over and caressing her mouth once more before lifting her up out of bed. I carried her to the bathroom and set her down on the tile.

"Take a human moment," I told her, leaning down to kiss her one more time. "I'll see what I can gather for breakfast."

She reached up and touched the slightly darkening skin under my eye. "You need to eat, too."

I took her hand, bringing her fingers to my lips. "I will, probably later tonight while you're sleeping. I'll have Jacob stay in the apartment with you for a couple of hours."

"I don't need a babysitter, Edward."

"It's not for you," I assured her, backing out of the bathroom. "It's for me."

I left her to her ablutions and went to forage in the kitchen. I had eggs, bacon, and bagels sitting on the counter when she came out.

"I'll do it," she sighed, a grin quirking her lips as she saw the unconscious wrinkling of my nose as I cracked eggs and put bacon in the skillet.

"No, I've got it," I told her, determined to make her something to eat. I prepared the food with what I thought was decent skill and served it to her on the counter bar.

Preparing the food had gone well, but I felt slightly anxious watching her eat it. I went to the balcony doors to gaze out while she ate, a disquieting feeling swirling through me. I frowned; the only sound in the flat was the clinking of her silverware against the plate and her chewing and swallowing. I concentrated, listening intently, aware of each of her heartbeats and breaths.

I sensed him out there, somewhere very close. Felix had returned. I could only be grateful it wasn't James – yet.

"Bella. It's time," I told her, moving in a blur across the room to her side and taking her upper arms in my hands. I lifted her off of the stool, and her fork clattered to the stone countertop. I tried to manage the urgent sense of alarm that coursed through me. "We've got to go. Now."

"But -" I could smell the shot of adrenaline that flooded her system and hear the sudden, frantic acceleration of her heartbeat.

"Bella, you must listen to me." I bent down, still gripping her shoulders and put my face very close to hers. Capturing her eyes, I used every bit of force of will I had to make her understand. "I will keep you safe, but you must listen and do everything I say, the instant I say it." She opened her mouth again, and I gave her an impatient shake before tempering my urgency once more. "I love you, Bella, and I promise I won't let anything happen to you. But it is going to get very bad, very fast, and if I'm worrying about you – I…" I shook my head as emotion swamped me.

"I'll be a distraction," she finished softly, and I sagged in relief.

"Yes," I gasped, smiling a faint, sad smile. "Yes, and although my mind can handle many more things all at once than a human mind can, my worry for you will definitely be a distraction. Can you promise me you will do what I say, when I say it, no matter what?"

"Edward -"

"No matter what, Bella. Promise me. I'll do everything I can. I will keep my promise to you. But…Please, Bella. Don't make me any more worried about you than I already am."

She stared at me and then nodded her head shortly. I framed her precious face in my hands and kissed her lips softly, lingeringly, and she whimpered. I pressed my forehead to hers and said a prayer for the first time in over one hundred years.

"I love you, Edward," she whispered, and hugged me tight.

"I love you, too," I returned, deliberately inhaling her scorching scent, almost welcoming the burn.

I dashed into the bedroom and grabbed the backpack filled with necessities that we'd packed, pulling my jacket over my arms. I shouldered the pack and was back in front of Bella before she had time to really register my disappearance. She grabbed her jacket and smiled shakily at me, taking my proffered hand. I gave hers a reassuring squeeze, and we walked out of the apartment.

I'd heard the scrum of his thoughts, but I could smell him even before I opened the door. He was in the courtyard. Pausing very briefly, I considered our options – none of which were good. I set my jaw and firmly put Bella behind me as we came down the stairs. The confrontation was inevitable; it was better to have it here where I had more of an advantage and it was somewhat private.

I knew it would do no good to tell Bella to run – not only would she blatantly disobey this very first order, but it would not help her. If Felix was chasing her he would catch her, no matter where she went, no matter how fast. If Felix was chasing her, it meant I had failed, and nothing could save her.

"Stay behind me," I told her. "Stay behind me at all times. If he thinks he has an opening, he'll take it. Don't give him one."

Her hand rested briefly on my lower back in acknowledgement. Her heart was pounding so hard I knew she could not speak. I savored the touch, the heat, even as I despaired at her terror. I stepped out into the courtyard to see Felix standing patiently in the center.

"Felix," I said softly in greeting. He nodded, never taking his eyes from my face. I scanned his thoughts, and even though he had developed some ability to block me, his heightened state of alertness allowed me access.

"Edward," he returned in the same tone. "Please, don't make it come to this. Hand over the girl and let's just end this here and now."

"Leave, and we'll end this here and now," I returned.

"Unfortunately, I cannot," he said, and I tipped my head, smirking regretfully, indicating the same.

He sighed, and we stared at each other.

He was considering his chances. As I had concluded, he decided they were fairly even, with a slight advantage to me. I was distracted by my worry for Bella, but he was distracted by his regard for me as a friend. He was stronger, but I was quicker. He was more experienced, but I could read his mind, and this is what gave me the advantage. We knew each other's form and style in a confrontation, having worked so closely together for so long, as well as each other's philosophy in a fight. What he didn't count on was my conviction and devotion to protect the woman who depended on me, the utter strength of my determination that no harm would come to her.

He also did not know that Bella was my singer, and that compulsion negated any advantage my resolve to protect her offered. There was no way I could truly let loose, let my animal nature take over as I needed to in a fight to protect what was mine. If I did so, the control I so desperately counted on to keep Bella safe from my desire for her blood would be gone. For her to die by my hand or by his – neither was acceptable. It was this dilemma that made the outcome of a fight between Felix and I so uncertain. The one small advantage I could actually count on was his ignorance of my uncertainty.

He took a couple of cautious steps toward us, and I stiffened, watching his eyes and listening closely to his thoughts. He radiated regret; he didn't want to do this. I could sympathize – I didn't want him to do it, either. He came closer, and I dropped into an instinctive crouch, protectively spreading my arms wide in front of Bella. An involuntary snarl of rage and warning ripped out of my chest. His step faltered almost imperceptibly, and he mirrored my crouch, surprise and regret echoing in his mind. He really was sorry it had come to this, and I felt a painful fissure open up inside me at the thought of what I had to do to my friend. But the desire to protect Bella was all-consuming, and there was no doubt in my mind or heart about who I had chosen in this battle.

I knew the instant before he launched himself at me and met him halfway, airborne. We collided with a resounding crash. I hit him in a way that drove us both back, away from Bella, and I was careful not to let our bodies roll. I knew that if he got my back away from her for an instant he could easily push off me and be on her before I could react.

We skidded across the cobblestones, crashing through the small fountain in the middle, various statuary, and flowerpots. I rose instantly, in position, prepared for his next assault. I cut off his angle toward Bella while still keeping him as far away from her as I could. He feinted left and then right, but I was a fraction of a second ahead of his movements. He came at me again, and this time we did roll, but it was to the side of the small yard and still away from Bella. He got a hold of my left arm, and I felt an agonizing wrench before I managed to free myself and pin him to the ground. He bucked up, scissoring his legs, and I managed to stop the roll of our bodies, my back still determinedly protecting what was mine.

His teeth snapped dangerously close to my neck, and I thrust him away, regaining my feet in the same instant, but so did he. I flew at him, hoping to catch him off balance, but he brought his hands up to slam into my chest and we crashed backward into the high stone wall. It shook and crumbled around us as we grappled. My left arm was seared with pain and weakened, and he managed to get a foot up and kick me away. I grabbed his arm at the last second with my right hand and brought him with me, flinging him toward the gate and away from Bella. I slammed into a pillar of the wall and was stunned for a fraction of a second. I frantically struggled to pull myself out of the fissure my body had made in the stone, searching for both Felix and Bella simultaneously.

Bella was still hovering at the foot of the covered stairs, clutching the backpack to her chest and holding back shocked, gasping breaths. Her eyes met mine briefly before I swung around to where I heard Felix's thoughts. He was slowly standing, pulling himself to his feet, glancing in grim satisfaction at my damaged left arm. I let it hang loosely, hoping he thought it was unusable, and braced myself. He came at me hard and fast, and I took the impact, letting him propel us back into the wall again. It kept my back to Bella. He took hold of my left arm and yanked. I howled and whirled on him, spinning him toward the gate. I stood for a split-second, panting in pain, feeling venom drip down my arm from where it was damaged and then leapt for him once again.

Except he was no longer there. An enormous, heaving pile of snarling red fur grabbed him up in its flashing jaws. The wolf shook its head and flung Felix into the corner, away from us, and pounced on his inert body. His giant forepaws stood on the vampire's chest while his great head swung around toward me.

_Go!_ Jacob yelled in my head. _Go, now! Take her, Edward, and go!_

_Thank you, _I thought, flashing to Bella's side and swinging her unceremoniously onto my back.

"Hold on," I told her grimly, clasping her hands around my neck and holding my good right hand over them to secure her. Her legs came up around my waist, and her ankles locked just above my hipbones. "Good girl," I panted. "Now, close your eyes."

I flew.

**X-X-X-X-X**

We made it to de Gaulle in a matter of minutes. I had debated going to a smaller, more out of the way airfield, but decided that the large and busy nature of the main airport in Paris would be to our benefit, as well as the availability and number of flights it offered to the United States. I thought that we had a little bit of time – I knew Jacob would hold Felix as long as he could, and I felt fairly confident Felix himself would delay as long as possible to make contact with Aro about our escape.

I came to a stop in a quiet, deserted corner of the car park at the Air France terminal. Bella wobbled as I set her down but bravely rallied, taking a deep breath and holding on to my hand. She had done amazingly well for her first ride at vampire speed – my vampire speed at that. I set the backpack on the ground as well and brushed my fingers through her tangled hair.

"Air France has personalized check-in for first class customers," I told her, checking her for bumps, bruises and making sure she didn't look like she'd just ridden on the back of a vampire at incredible velocity across the city. "I'll see if I can't change our tickets for tomorrow to the first available flight to the States. If I can't, we'll just buy new ones. Okay?"

"Okay," she breathed, and squeezed my hand. "Are the tickets in our names, though?"

"Yes." I unobtrusively checked my left arm, but the small amount of damage Felix had caused was already completely healed. I led her toward the terminal. "But it won't make any difference. By the time the Volturi realize what's happened and get organized to send anyone after us again – if they bother at all - " that was a long shot, but if it made her feel a little better to hear, it would do no harm, "-we'll be safe at home in Hoquiam."

She nodded, and we moved with unobtrusive but quiet purpose for the Air France l'Espace Premiere check-in. I kept my senses open, constantly scouting and on alert, but all I could detect was the normal course of human life around us. I gave the attendant my name and showed her my passport, and she led us straight to a desk where another staff member waited to assist us. Bella fidgeted nervously while I was still and stoic, constantly monitoring those around us. We approached the agent and I used my best voice, smooth and compelling, while offering her a soft, concentrated smile. Her heartbeat stuttered, and so did Bella's.

I explained what we wanted, and after some frowning, debating and clicking of keys, she was able to secure us a first class flight to Atlanta leaving in two and a half hours. From there we would have a two hour layover before boarding another flight to Seattle. I thanked her sincerely, and she mentally sighed as she snuck quick glances at my face. She stifled a surge of surprise we had no luggage to check, but she was professional and efficient as she processed the payment for the change in our travel plans on my credit card and handed us our boarding passes.

I ushered Bella through security with no incident. Many detectors objected to the foreign composition of my body, and I had to be careful to avoid those scanners that registered body heat. I guided her to the exclusive lounge for first class passengers, and we found a small but unoccupied area where she could sit. Another staff member offered to take my jacket and the backpack, which I politely refused. He then went on to explain the amenities of the lounge and offer us refreshment. We both requested mineral water, which was brought to us with courteous efficiency.

We settled in seats that were close to the large glass window, and I placed my water next to her. I knew if threatened, I could grab Bella and be through the glass and down the runway before anyone realized what was happening. She curled into my side, and I pulled her protectively against me, keeping track of her and those around us with constant vigilance. I had hoped she would sleep, or doze perhaps, but her nerves kept her from relaxing completely.

"Edward?" she asked quietly.

"Yes, my love." I brushed my lips through her hair, inhaling her and aching.

"Won't your family be in danger? Won't the Volturi send someone there?"

"They won't be in danger. We can handle any tracker that comes, or anyone they bring with them." Except Jane, of course, who had a power so great and devastating no one would stand a chance against her. She could, with her mind alone, cause the most unbearable, excruciating agony. I'd seen her abilities first hand, and she was absolutely lethal. I saw no reason to alert Bella to this fact at this point, however. They would most certainly send someone, but I couldn't see Jane leaving the Volturi stronghold and Aro's side for one AWOL vampire and a human…unless Bella's potential ability as a powerful shield was so attractive to them that they coveted her that much. Or they wanted us to be an example to any who thought to defy them, or…

"Edward." Bella peered into my face with consternation. My expression must have been alarming.

"Shh, we'll be safe soon." I hugged her gently, and after a moment she settled her head back onto my chest.

"You're hungry," she said, her voice muffled in my shirt. "You didn't get a chance to go…eat."

"I'll be fine," I assured her. Being cooped up with her scent and all the other humans in a metal tube would be somewhat uncomfortable, but I was certainly getting used to being uncomfortable around Bella. I could manage the burn in my throat for a few hours.

Another attendant eventually came to tell us our flight was preparing to board. He escorted us to a small, electric vehicle that took us right to the gate. He led us to the door to the jetway, speaking briefly with the gate attendant. With a curious, sideways look, the woman nodded and walked toward us, all smiles.

"Bonjour, Monsieur Cullen. I am Natalie. It is a pleasure to have you and Ms. Swan traveling with us today. Will you follow me, please?" She turned to the jetway door to punch in a code, and then led us down the long corridor to the Boeing 777. "There are only two other passengers traveling with us in first class," she explained in subtly accented English. "So you will have quite a bit of privacy for your flight."

The other first class passengers had arrived just before us and retreated from my foreign presence unconsciously as we passed them with a nod. Natalie introduced us to our two flight attendants, Adele and Denis, and wished us a safe and comfortable trip.

"Wow," Bella said, wide-eyed as she watched Natalie exit. She turned to our seats, located in the middle of the plane. They resembled two comfortable chairs angled toward each other with a small table between them. "So this is the service you get in First Class."

I grinned at her as we sat. Adele approached with two glasses of champagne and explained the amenities. She handed us each a toiletry bag and slippers, along with a small, empty bag. Bella shook it at me with a questioning lift to her brows when Adele moved on to the other couple in the First Class cabin.

"For your shoes," I told her.

Her brows rose higher, and a delighted grin spread across her face. She took hers off and placed them in the bag and slid her small feet into the plush slippers. She wiggled her toes and sighed, taking a sip of the bubbly liquid in her glass. I hoped she could rest on the long flight.

I scanned the minds of the crew and then every passenger as they filed onto the plane. Denis came by and placed our backpack in one of the side storage bins. The first class accommodations on the 777 were as luxurious as could be expected on a plane, and I was glad that Bella wouldn't be too cramped or uncomfortable while we were in the air. I'd give her every chance to unwind that I could.

I sensed nothing out of the ordinary with the passengers or the crew and settled into my seat.

"Is everything okay?" Bella asked, placing her hand on my arm and biting her lip anxiously.

"Yes. It's fine," I reassured her, patting her fingers and smiling at her. She returned it and settled back. I didn't allow myself to relax until the door had been closed and we taxied away from the gate.

The seats lay flat but were nowhere near wide enough to accommodate two bodies, so Bella set hers to recline with a pout. Adele provided us with soft velvet loungewear that Bella stroked with her fingertips. I watched, amused, as she sorted through her bag of complimentary toiletries, opening, examining, and sniffing. After about an hour she got bored playing with all the amenities and reached for her purse, pulling out a worn paperback copy of _Jane Eyre_.

"Really?" I asked her with a meaningful look at the tattered book.

"'I hold myself supremely blest," she quoted softly, holding my gaze. "'Blest beyond what language can express; because I am my husband's life as fully as he is mine. No woman was ever nearer to her mate than I am: ever more absolutely bone of his bone, and flesh of his flesh. I know no weariness of my Edward's society: he knows none of mine.'"

She broke the quote off there, knowing as well as I the rest spoke of hearts beating in separate bosoms, which only one of us had. She blushed, and I reached out to trace my fingers over the flushed curve of her cheek. She leaned in toward me, and the book slipped off her lap onto the floor. We both reached for it with a laugh. She was still gazing into my face when her fingers bumped forcefully against the base of the seat.

"Ow!" she exclaimed, jerking her hand back and her fingers brushed the hard paper cover of the book. She hissed as the stiff material sliced the skin of her fingertip, and she brought her hand up to her face to hover between us.

Our gazes met, horror-struck. A fat, red drop of blood welled from the cut, spilled across her palm, and trickled slowly, tauntingly, down her wrist.


	17. Chapter 16: Merrily Did Sing

**SMeyer owns the Twilight world, me just this little speck.**

**Sarahsumbrella and silentnc - without you, this would really be a lot less fun, let alone correct - so thank you!**

**Thanks so much to everyone who has taken time to read and leave me a note and recc'd the story.**

* * *

**CHAPTER SIXTEEN: Merrily Did Sing**

In the next millisecond I was gone, locking myself in the oversized bathroom reserved for the first class passengers only. I stopped breathing. The urge to tear the door off of the plane and leap was second only to the urge to have that luscious red drop on my tongue, in my mouth – to sink my teeth into her and suck and draw and glut myself on…her life.

No. _No_. I fisted my hands in my hair and dropped to my knees with a thud. The air circulated on a different system in the lavatory than in the cabin, and I was thankful for even that small bit of relief. I could still smell her, the blood, awful and glorious, but it was somewhat lessened. It wouldn't continue to be, though, for the next six odd hours, sitting next to her in this metal torture chamber.

Could I bear it? It had caught me by such surprise, so unaware and unprepared. Could I bring myself under control, having been exposed to her blood, knowing now what it smelled like, flowing freely? My entire frame shuddered and shook, and I mastered myself in long, painful increments. I finally felt enough strength to gasp in a short breath and felt the staggering impact. I took another, and another, and finally one through my nose.

I fell forward, pressing my forehead to the wall. I squeezed my eyes shut in shame and barely restrained myself from pounding my fists. They would certainly punch through the metal. This was Bella, my Bella, her scent, her essence – her life. I panted, opening my eyes and setting my jaw in determination. Slowly I stood, staring at my wild-eyed reflection in the mirror. I grimaced at the "relaxing" scented products on the tiny counter as I turned on the water and methodically washed my hands, more to stall and calm my rioting emotions than anything else. I stared at my reflection for a few moments longer, grimly steeling my resolve, until I was certain I could trust myself and present a calm, unruffled face to her. She would never know the struggle I dealt with, the searing pain, and the shame of my response to her blood. I _would_ be worthy of her.

I stepped out of the lavatory and moved, not hesitating, not breathing, back to my seat. She was watching me – pale, wide-eyed, biting her lip. My eyes slid down to her hand cradled in her lap and smelled soap, antiseptic, plastic, Bella, and blood. My nose twitched, but I sat smoothly beside her. She turned to face me, her eyes searching my face anxiously as she unconsciously brought her injured hand behind her. She had put on a band-aid. How she thought that would help I couldn't fathom.

"Edward," she began, mouth trembling, but Denis approached and leaned over me in concern.

"Monsieur Cullen, is everything all right? Is there anything I can get you?"

"No," I assured him with a fluid smile, certain he couldn't sense the effort behind it. "I'm fine, but thank you."

He nodded, reassured, and returned to his duties.

Bella was pressing back in her seat, away from me, as I turned to her. I paused in shock and stared at her. Was she scared of me? The feeling of dread that coursed through me was indescribable.

"Bella," I rasped. I took in air and barely repressed a shudder.

"Edward, are you…should I …is it -"

I hesitantly raised my hand and slowly brushed her hair back off of her shoulder, exposing her smooth, white neck. Both of us sagged in relief at the touch, and she pressed her face into my palm, closing her eyes and letting a sob escape.

"I'm so sorry! I'm such an idiot, a klutz. I should be locked away, for my own good, for everyone around me. Can you forgive me? Please?" she babbled.

"Forgive you?" I whispered harshly. "What is there to forgive, Bella? It was an accident, nothing more. I'm the one who's sorry. A paper cut shouldn't cause such anguish or cost you your life." She opened her eyes to look at me. "I'm the one who's sorry. I'm sorry for what I am."

"I'm not," she told me, her heart in her eyes. "I'm not sorry for who and what you are. I love you. You can't help it."

"Neither can you," I pointed out, realizing my words could apply on a number of different levels.

She turned her head slightly and kissed my palm. I slid my thumb across her soft lips, and she stared into my eyes as she parted them and pressed her teeth against the pad. She moaned softly, her eyes fluttering at the taste. Heat and a different, healthy sort of desire burst between us.

I slid my hand down around her throat, pausing over the spot where her pulse beat and throbbed, and then continuing on to curve around the nape and bring her mouth to mine.

"I love you," I murmured, and kissed her. Her scent swirled across my lips, in my mouth, down my throat, and through my head. I was immersed in her, and I'd never craved anything more in my entire existence.

**X-X-X-X-X**

We made it to Atlanta with no other incidents and changed planes. The first class accommodations were a little less luxurious than on the 777 from Paris, but it was a much shorter flight. Bella didn't seem to notice. She curled up against my side, inhaling happily, and promptly fell asleep. I was glad she could get some rest as I had no idea what was waiting for us in Washington. I knew there was little to no chance the Volturi could have gotten someone there already, but I would be on guard all the same.

I was mostly concerned about my family and their reaction to the prodigal's return, not to mention with a mate, a human, bringing drama and potential danger. I knew Rosalie would be disgusted, expecting nothing less from me. Carlisle and Esme would welcome us with open arms, and Alice was excited to meet Bella. Jasper and Emmett would be accepting, but more than that, I had no idea. I had no idea if we would stay or move on, or how Bella would react to her new life. All I did know was that she was determined to be with me, forever, and I would keep her safe. I tried to let that be enough, because it was everything.

We had no baggage to claim at Sea-Tac, just the backpack I carried. We exited the jetway and made our way to the underground transit system that took us to the main terminal. I stood over her protectively while she sat for the short ride, pulling my phone out to call Alice about the location of the car as soon as we cleared the train. It rang with no answer, and I frowned. I could certainly find the car by scent, but it would take longer, and she knew I would be anxious. I began to worry.

"Edward?" Bella questioned as I frowned at the phone in my hand.

"Alice isn't answering," I said thoughtfully. She looked at me with mild alarm, and I shook my head, guiding her to the doors that lead to the parking garage. "I'm sure it's okay. It's just that -"

She elbowed me in my side and nodded her head. I looked up to see what she was indicating, and saw my sister and Jasper standing to one side by the door. Alice was practically vibrating and waving her hand frantically down by her waist, trying to be discreet. It wasn't bad, for Alice.

"Um," Bella said with a smile. "I think they're trying to get your attention?"

I held her hand as I approached my brother and sister with a smile. Alice's eyes darted from my face to Bella's, and she grabbed our free hands as soon as we were in reach. Jasper just grinned at me apologetically.

_He's smiling,_ Alice thought, _he looks_ happy. She leaned up to press a kiss first to my cheek and then to Bella's.

"Hi Bella, I'm Alice, and this is Jasper." She couldn't stand it another minute. "It already seems like I know so much about you. We're going to be great friends."

"Uh," Bella responded with a bewildered look at me, and I rolled my eyes.

"I thought you were just going to leave the car for us," I said, shaking my hand loose from Alice's to clasp Jasper's.

He gripped my hand hard and pulled me into an awkward hug as I still was holding on to Bella. I could sense his relief and gladness I was home, and squeezed his shoulder in acknowledgement.

"It's good to see you, too, Jazz," I murmured, letting go to smile at him.

Alice smirked at me. "I could see that it would be better if we drove back with you, a little less overwhelming for Bella." She expertly extricated Bella from my grip and wrapped her arm around her waist.

"How is this less overwhelming?" I asked Jazz in a low voice. He barked out a laugh, and of course, Alice heard.

She turned her head to shoot me a scowl. "This way, there are only four people for her to meet at the house instead of six. By the time we get there, she'll already be used to me and Jasper. It might be better for her to be somewhat comfortable before…well…Rosalie. And Emmett." She bit her lip in an effort not to grin at the thought of our over-exuberant brother.

Jasper and I exchanged a look, knowing she was – one again – correct. I sighed, and he and I fell into step behind the women. Alice chattered to Bella as we walked to the car, describing the house and the other members of my family. I saw that they had brought Carlisle's Mercedes. I stepped ahead to hold one of the back doors open for Bella before moving swiftly around the car to slide in next to her. Jasper got in behind the wheel, with Alice next to him. She immediately turned backward in her seat to keep up her conversation with the mostly silent Bella. I looked at her in consternation, but she had a slightly bemused smile on her face and seemed to be following along with Alice's excited monologue.

"Of course, we made some changes to Edward's bedroom," she was saying, catching my attention.

"What have you done to my room?" I asked warily. I'd been gone for so long, it was only natural they would have done something with the space. I couldn't imagine it sitting, pristine and untouched, the entire time I was gone, but still. It had always been my personal refuge.

Alice laughed delightedly. "It was Esme, of course." I relaxed somewhat; I trusted Esme's taste and discretion absolutely. "She found the most perfect bed. Big." She waggled her eyebrows. "Sturdy. Plus, Emmett made some adjustments – bolstered it up a bit."

I scowled, and Jasper laughed. I looked at Bella to see if the conversation was a little much for her – after all, she'd just met my sister and brother and already the sexual innuendoes were starting. And she hadn't even met Emmett yet. To my surprise, she was staring at me with a hot, intense gaze, and I fought back a groan of need. I reached out and curled my hand around the back of her neck, pulling her to me, and covering her soft mouth with mine.

"Dang it, looks like Emmett was right." There was a rustling up front, and I heard money changing hands. I broke away from Bella to snark at them for betting on our sexual behavior, but I was distracted by the look on Bella's face. She licked her lips, panting and staring at my mouth. I groaned and kissed her again.

Jasper's thoughts were smug as more money changed hands. "Looks like Emmett was right to put some more supports on the bed," Jasper chuckled. "Remember the bed in his and Rosalie's first house? And how pissed Esme was?"

I sat back slowly, an involuntary grin curling my mouth as I couldn't help but remember. Bella looked at me, dazed but curious.

"For the first few years after they got together, Rose and Emmett…well," I rubbed reflexively at the back of my neck and grimaced. "Let's just say they are very demonstrative couple. A perfect pair, which is both a good and bad thing."

"I think they spent the first ten years of their marriage f- uh, having relations, all the time," Jasper amended with a wince and a quick glance in the rearview mirror at Bella. "Often. Loudly. Exuberantly."

I rubbed my nose and turned to her. "It got so bad that Esme finally designed and built them their own house. What was it, about a week after they moved in?" I glanced at Alice for confirmation and she nodded, covering her mouth to hold in the giggles. "The three of us," I gestured between Alice, Jazz and I, "went over to see how things were going. We walked in the front door…" I had to stop to try to still the laughter that threatened at the memory, and Bella smiled, our humor contagious. "And th- the bed..." I started laughing. "The bed was in the living room." We couldn't stop our snickers at the memory, but Bella only smiled slightly, looking confused.

"The bedroom was upstairs," Alice explained, and Jasper was laughing so hard even I was worried he couldn't see the road. Bella still looked a bit lost so Alice continued her explanation. "The bed had fallen through the floor, Bella, to the living room below. They actually broke through the floor. God, Esme was so mad."

Bella's hand flew to her mouth and she burst out laughing with us. "Is that even possible?"

"With those two," Jasper said, "anything is not only possible, but probable. You'll see."

Bella grinned at me, her expression slowly turning speculative. "Ten years?" she whispered, and I knew what she meant. She licked her lips again, staring at my mouth, and I groaned.

I pulled her close again. "We won't have to sleep." I breathed my cold breath in her hair, and she shivered. "Or eat." I brushed my lips below her ear. "Or drink." My tongue traced down the tendon of her neck. "Or go to the bathroom." I pressed my lips where her neck met the swell of her shoulder. "Or ever get tired. I'll never stop." I nudged under her jaw with my nose and brought my lips to hover over hers. "I'll never stop loving you."

She whimpered, tilting her head to bring our lips together. I lost myself in her taste, her warmth, her scent…until Jasper coughed uncomfortably.

"You're killin' me here," he complained, shifting in his seat.

"Sorry, Jazz," I murmured, pulling back slightly, not taking my eyes from hers. "Jasper's talent is emotions," I explained to Bella, my finger stroking her soft, delicate cheek. "He's drawn to them, and can control them to a certain extent. He can calm an excited room or stir up a quiet one."

"Oh." Bella blushed and her eyes slid to Jasper's back. "Sorry."

"It's okay, darlin'," he assured her, giving her a wink in the mirror. "It's nice to feel such a good vibe around our Edward here. Usually he's just doom and gloom. A little lust and happiness coming from him is worth any discomfort, let me tell you. It's a nice change."

He and Alice exchanged a smiling glance, and his hand settled on her knee. I scowled at their smug thoughts.

"Ahh," Jasper said, smirking at me in the mirror. "Now that's the Edward I know and love. This I'm familiar with."

"Keep your eyes on the road," I grumbled, and he snorted.

We made it to the house in Hoquiam in great time. Jasper pulled into the winding lane and drove to the front of the secluded house. It backed up to a private lake, surrounded by trees, bushes, and Esme's gardens. It stood still and silent, but I could hear the jumble of thoughts from the inhabitants. I could also hear Bella's heart rate climb. I turned to her in the backseat, taking her hands and smiling.

"Don't worry," I told her, pressing my mouth to her forehead. "They're going to love you."

She nodded, a trembling smile that really wasn't reassuring drifting across her face. I suddenly realized that she might not be nervous about meeting my family, but meeting my family of vampires.

"I'll never let anything happen to you," I assured her. "They are really great people – you'll see."

She and Alice gave me the same exasperated look. "What if they don't like me?" Bella whispered.

"Of course they will," I said automatically, and she frowned doubtfully. "Even if you weren't wonderful in your own right, they'd love you because I do."

She thought about this for a few brief seconds and then gave me a real smile. "Well, then, even if they aren't wonderful, I'll love them because you do."

Alice rolled her eyes. "You're all wonderful, we all love each other, blah, blah, blah. Now go on. Everything is going to be just fine, I know it." She tapped the side of her head with a grin, and I shook my head.

"Ready?" I asked Bella. She nodded determinedly, taking a deep breath as I got out and went around the car to open her door. I took her hand again as we walked up the wide stairs to the front porch.

I paused in front of the broad, double doors, giving her hand one last gentle squeeze. She returned the pressure, and I opened the door.

"Hello?" I called, unnecessarily. Carlisle and Esme stood in the archway leading from the foyer into the living room. Carlisle had his arm around Esme's waist, and her hand covered her mouth, trembling. She stared at me, gentle sobs shaking her small form, and one hand reached out.

"Edward?" she whispered, and I let go of Bella to go to her. "Oh, Edward!"

She threw her arms around me, still sobbing silent, dry tears. Even though she was much, much smaller, I felt enfolded in her embrace. I closed my eyes and hugged her close. "Mom."

Another harsh sob broke from her at my soft utterance, and I felt Carlisle's hand on my back. I shifted to include him in the embrace, and then lifted my head to find my Bella. She stood with a beautiful smile, watching us, tears glinting on her cheeks. I held out my hand to her and she walked toward us hesitantly.

"Carlisle, Esme, this is Bella." I stood up straight, smiling into her beautiful face. I turned to them, bringing her small hand up to my lips.

Esme smiled tremulously and held out a hand. "Bella. Welcome." I could read her thoughts; she was wondering if she would scare her if she hugged her. I smiled.

"She wants to hug you," I murmured in Bella's ear, leaning in to her.

"Oh." Bella looked startled and then a bit embarrassed as she turned to Esme. "Um, of course."

Moving slowly, Esme slipped her arms around Bella's shoulders and squeezed delicately. "I can't tell you how very, very glad we are to meet you," she said. She took a small step back, holding Bella's shoulders and smiling.

"Very glad," Carlisle echoed the sentiment, taking his turn to gently hug her.

I heard carefully controlled thoughts from the top of the stairs. Rosalie. And another, determined not to overwhelm Bella – too much. Emmett.

I turned to them as they descended the stairs at a human pace. Instinctively, I moved so Bella was slightly behind me, and from the slight smirk that flashed across Rose's face, I knew it did not go unnoticed.

"Rosalie," I greeted her, slightly unsure of our reception.

She paused, posing for effect on the second to last stair. She narrowed her gaze on my face. "I missed you," she finally said, and I grinned.

"Honestly? Me, too." She gracefully descended the last steps and hugged me fiercely.

"My turn!" Emmett jumped the last few steps and wrapped his arms around both Rose and me, lifting us up and twirling us around. "It's good to see that pretty face, brother," he said, finally setting us down. He slapped me happily on the back, and I manfully prevented a stagger. He did it again. "Man, it is good to see you."

"You, too, Em." I turned to Bella, who was staring at my giant of a brother with wide eyes. "Rosalie, Emmett, this is Bella."

Emmett gently reached out to take her tiny hand in his enormous one. "Hey, Bella. Oh, wow, you smell really good."

Her eyes widened as she turned to me, and I smacked Emmett at the same time Rosalie did. "What?" he protested, looking back and forth between the two of us. "She really does."

Rose smacked him again and stepped in front of him to stare at Bella. She was chilly and aloof, her eyes distant and judgmental. I sighed, reading the disapproval – and resentment? – in her thoughts. Bella's eyes widened, and Rosalie graciously overlooked her gaping. She was used to the reaction to her supernatural beauty. "It's nice to meet you, Bella," she said coolly, not offering a hug or her hand, and I sighed again. Rose's eyes did warm as they slid to me. "Thank you for dragging this idiot home."

"Um, you're welcome?" Bella shifted uncomfortably at the slightly unfriendly welcome, and I tugged her to my side. I had done my best to warn her about Rosalie, but there was nothing like the full experience. Thankfully Jasper and Alice came in, carrying our backpack and breaking the uneasy silence.

"Isn't she great?" Alice asked, kissing Bella's cheek as she went by. I took the backpack and Bella's hand, smiling fondly at my sister's retreating form.

"We'll just go upstairs and set this down. I can show Bella our room." Our room. Wonderful.

Esme nodded, and I guided Bella up the stairs. "Vampire hearing," I whispered in her hair, reminding her that everyone in the house would hear what we said. I was absolutely certain they would be listening. "They're planning on making you something to eat. We have a few minutes."

She nodded as we reached the top of the stairs. "Alice and Jasper's," I told her nodding to the left at a closed door. I turned her to the right and swung open the door. "Ours," I said in satisfaction, my eyes sweeping the room to take in both the familiar and the different.

"Rosalie doesn't care for me much, huh?" she said, biting her lip.

"Rosalie doesn't care much for anybody, other than herself and Emmett," I told her, putting the backpack on the leather sofa at the foot of the bed. "Don't worry about her, she'll warm up eventually. It won't be a problem. Come on." I took her hand and led her to the en suite bathroom. "You'll feel better after freshening up, my little human."

**X-X-X-X-X**

After relaxing and exploring the room, and bouncing on the bed with childish grins, we made our way back downstairs. The god-awful smell of food cooking assaulted my nostrils, almost drowning out Bella's luscious scent. As we rounded the corner from where the stairs emptied into the foyer, we could see into the great room and kitchen. Esme was busy at the stove while Alice watched in absorbed fascination.

"I hope you're hungry," Esme called to Bella as she saw us approach the kitchen warily. I couldn't remember it being used before, except maybe to wash our hands or something.

"Um, sure," Bella said, looking at me out of the corner of her eye. I could tell she was wondering if Esme even knew how to cook.

"Esme's been practicing making human food and testing it out on Carlisle's hospital staff," Emmett volunteered from his chair where he was absorbed in a basketball game. "Poor bastards."

Jasper and Carlisle exchanged a look and then studiously concentrated on the television.

"I'll have you know I was a very good cook, back when…" She trailed off with a look at Bella out of the corner of her eye. "Well, back in the day."

"Yeah," Emmett snorted as his eyes followed the game. "And that was what? Almost a hundred years ago? And you know how good our human memories are."

Carlisle made shushing motions as Esme scowled at Emmett.

"I'm sure it will be fine," Bella told her bravely. "I didn't get to eat much on the airplane." Her eyes, as well as mine and Alice's, drifted toward her finger where the cut had sealed closed.

After she had eaten – and assured Esme that the baked ziti turned out great – I took her on a tour of the rest of the house. I pointed out Carlisle and Esme's suite on the main floor, and Emmett and Rosalie's in the basement with the media and game room. We came back upstairs, and I showed her Carlisle's study and the open, atrium-like area next to it that was separated from the great room by tall glass French doors. In the center of the room sat a stunning black lacquered piano. I stopped in the doorway but did not enter, a mixture of strange emotions swirling through me when I saw the instrument.

Bella wandered in and headed straight for it, running her fingertips reverently along the glossy surface. She turned, realizing I had paused, and looked at me curiously.

"Who plays? Esme?"

I shook my head slowly. "No."

"Oh." She frowned, still caressing the smooth surface. "Who, then?"

I stared at the piano and swallowed. "I do."

"You?" her voice was unflatteringly flabbergasted, and I raised a brow in amusement. She blushed, of course, and stammered, "well, of course I…I mean…I'm just surprised…"

I stuck my hands in my pockets and leaned against the doorframe as her voice faded. She picked up on my unease and walked to me, putting her hand on my arm.

"What's the matter, Edward?" I shrugged, not meeting her gaze, and she frowned again. She was quiet, studying me, and finally asked softly, "Will you play for me?"

I hunched my shoulders and stared down at my feet. I knew she was going to ask. I could refuse her nothing, and yet…it had been so long since I'd played, and they were not happy memories. She waited patiently, and I looked up at her, examining her precious features. It was time to put all of that behind me and start making new memories with the beautiful woman before me.

"For you," I said softly, straightening, "anything."

She touched my cheek, and I went to take a seat at the familiar bench. I sat quietly for a few moments, letting the familiar pull center within me. I lifted the lid and ran my fingers along the keys – it was, of course, kept in perfect tune. I could hear the rest of my family go still and the shocked tenor of their thoughts at the sound. I smiled without humor, letting my emotions drift into contentment when I met Bella's encouraging gaze.

I ran the scales and then let my fingers flow, ghosting over familiar classics, silky love songs, floating over complicated melodies. Bella raised shining eyes to me, and suddenly the joy in my gift came flooding back as I began Esme's song, her favorite. I became aware that, one by one, my family had come to the door separating the rooms to listen. I could hear Esme's delight, her happiness at my contentment, Carlisle's thrill and satisfaction that I was home, under the same roof, and the other's thoughts of welcome.

We spent a fun evening together, singing and laughing as I took requests and played a wide variety of music, from Alice's indie rock to Jasper's haunting ballads, Emmett's rollicking country and Rosalie's oldies. Finally, I saw Bella trying to hide yawns behind her hand and her eyes drooping. I ended the impromptu session with a flourish and took her in my arms.

"Bedtime for the human," I said firmly as she rested her head on my shoulder with a smile.

"I don't want to, but I can't seem to keep my eyes open," she said around another yawn.

"You've had a long day," I murmured into her hair. "It will all be here tomorrow." I lifted her in my arms and carried her out of the room amid everyone's murmured "good-nights".

I smiled at Esme as she thought about how happy she was I was home and had brought Bella, no matter the circumstances. I heard variants of the same thought from everyone else and threw them a grateful smile. "Thank you," I murmured, so low Bella couldn't hear, but they all nodded and went on their ways for the evening.

I brought Bella to our room and set her on her feet, giving her a gentle push toward the attached bath so that she could get ready for bed. I stripped down to my briefs and climbed in to the large, comfortable bed, laying on top of the comforter but flipping it back on one side for Bella. She emerged a few minutes later, crawled in with a grateful smile, and snuggled under the sheets against me. I held her close, once again counting her heart beats and feeling the rise and fall of her chest. "Welcome home," I murmured into her ear, and she hummed drowsily.

"I love you," she said, and I held her close.

"I don't know why," I murmured softly into her hair. "But thank you."


	18. Chapter 17: Come Hither

**SMeyer owns a lot more than I do, because she owns Twilight. I kinda own some stuff, including this story, but nothing about Twilight.**

**silentnc and Sarahsumbrella - big smoochies for your comments, suggestions, and corrections of the crap I miss, even though I've gone over this a bazillion times. Love you guys.**

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**CHAPTER SEVENTEEN: Come Hither**

Bella slept while threads of thought wound round and round in my head. I silently slipped out of the bed, pulling on a pair of well-worn grey sweatpants, and drifted down the stairs to the piano. It called to me like a sleeping lover just wakened, demanding my attention in the subtlest of ways. I sat down in the moonlight, my fingers tinkering along the keys, and thought about how different playing tonight had been than the last time I had sat here. I picked out a few disjointed melodies as I sat and brooded.

It had been here, sitting at this bench, my fingers on these very same keys, that I had reached my breaking point. It had even been this same time of night, when I'd been alone in the dark with loneliness consuming me. Emptiness had filled me, an aching need, as I unwillingly listened to the intimacies going on around me. My family, my closest link to companionship – each had been joined with their mate, their other half. My head was consumed with them, but they had had no thoughts of me, only of each other.

It was right, the way it should be…but it had brought home my despair and isolation, my inadequacy at not being able to form that kind of bond with another creature. It was then that I had made my decision to leave my home and the people I considered family. Dissatisfaction and restlessness had overwhelmed me, and I had gone. It wasn't until I had seen this beautiful instrument again that I realized the depth of my solitude and the self-destructive feelings that had overwhelmed me that particular evening. As I sat here once more, however, with the woman I loved sleeping peacefully upstairs in my bed, I realized there was nothing of that anguish left inside of me.

It was Bella, Bella who made the difference. I was so torn in my mind – I could never let her go, go back to the shell I had been, but keeping her with me was the most selfish act I could imagine. I knew what she wished for, to be changed, to be with me, and I believed she really did desire it with all her being. But…would she ever forgive me, once I had given her what she wanted? My fingers picked out a fatalistic dirge.

I heard Esme leave the master suite and pause by the staircase, sitting on the last step, out of my view, listening and worrying about me. I launched into her favorite piece, the one I had written for her many years ago, and heard her humming along both out loud and in her mind. I moved through the notes, telling her of my love and affection for her through the pretty melody, feeling her own love reflected back at me.

I became aware of Bella stirring upstairs, waking, and I shut my eyes as I concentrated on her. I heard her rise and move hesitantly toward the stairs, hearing me play. She descended slowly, pausing when she saw Esme, but continued down until she was on the bottom step. Bella lowered herself next to her, and I could hear Esme slip an arm around her shoulders.

I drifted into a new melody, one that had been rolling around in my head since I met Bella, lilting, soft, beautiful – both sad and joyful at the same time. They both sighed, and I heard Esme rubbing Bella's arm comfortingly.

"He hasn't played for us in years," she told Bella softly. "And I can't remember the last time he composed something new, let alone so beautiful. This one…" they both listened closely, and I sensed the shiver of pleasure that rolled though my mother as I played. "This one, it's new. And lovely. It reminds me of you."

I smelled the rush of blood to Bella's face, felt the subtle heat even with the distance between us. My song drifted into something more melancholy as the inevitable surge of venom filled my mouth. My fingers flew across the keys as I bent my head, letting the music pour out of me and shamelessly eavesdropping on the conversation between the two women I loved.

"It's so good to see him smile again and mean it," Esme continued in a low voice. I knew she was well aware I was listening. "This is Edward before he became so terribly lonely. It's so much worse for him, you know, more so than even Carlisle who was alone for centuries before…Edward."

"Worse?" Bella's voice was soft and sad.

"It's so much harder for Edward to bear; he can hear what he's missing, all of the time." Esme's fingertips brushed against her temple, the sound barely perceptible even to my ears. "That's what makes it so hard for him – so much worse than Carlisle's eons of being alone."

"How long was Carlisle alone?"

"Three-hundred years, a little more, maybe," came Esme's reply, and I heard Bella's shocked gasp. "He was alone for so long. He won't mind me telling you, now that you're family." I could hear Esme's pleased smile in the tone of her voice.

"Carlisle's father was a pastor in the late sixteen-hundreds. He was a demon hunter, back when it was harder for supernatural beings to hide, and people believed." Bella started in surprise, her clothes rustling slightly, and I heard Esme gave her a comforting rub along her skin. "And, oh, did he find demons! Carlisle was with him one night when they came upon a small coven of vampires and gave chase. Carlisle managed to separate one, and it turned on him, biting him. Well, he can give you the whole story, but after he woke from the change he was horrified at what he was, what he had become. He refused to kill people, so he isolated and starved himself until the hunger became too much and he attacked an animal. He found he could survive on the blood, and…" She shook her head. "He was alone, but eventually sought the company of other vampires. Since their philosophy and his differed, he never really made any meaningful connections. Plus, vampires are a pretty solitary species anyway, but he had no one. And then he came across Edward and his human family, dying in a hospital in Chicago.

"And how could he let one such as our Edward die? Even then, Carlisle said there was just something special about him, something shining and bright and brilliant. He agonized about doing to Edward what had been done to him. He hoped that Edward would come to understand, and wouldn't hate him as he hated the creature that did it to him, but in the end…he just hoped Edward wouldn't hate him too much. He still hopes…Well."

I bent my head in shame over the keys, the notes swelling, throbbing and sorrowful. After meeting Bella I could comprehend the temptation, the absolutely consuming need to end the vast, unrelenting loneliness. I understood the enormous attraction of finally having someone by your side, someone to share and lighten the burden of eternity. It was something I craved to the very core of my being – my mate. There was nothing I was not willing to risk to have her, to be a part of someone and finally feel complete – not her life, her soul, or my guilt. It was unbelievably selfish, but the bottom line was there was nothing I wanted more than her.

Had Carlisle felt any different? Had he wrestled with the same dilemma when dealing with his decision to change me? A huge weight lifted from my conscience. I finally understood what Carlisle had gone through when faced with the choice – let my natural life end and continue on with his bleak, lonely existence, or take the great risk of giving me the opportunity to continue in this world and end his torment. I drifted into a composition of mine that Carlisle favored, finally letting go of my stubborn bitterness, fully appreciating and forgiving my father for the unholy choice he had made.

A heaving breath came from the master suite, and one from the stairs as both Carlisle and Esme realized what the change in melody meant. I let the anger and guilt go, they floated up, up, and away on the light, airy notes swirling around the room and through the house. I made peace with Carlisle and with myself. I could only hope Bella would not resent me for changing her, especially since she was actively involved and had full knowledge of what her choice entailed beforehand. She was unique in that she had the chance to consider her options and make the decision for herself to become a vampire – she had chosen me.

"Be sure," Esme whispered to Bella. I could hear the tears she could not cry in her voice. "Bella, be very sure. Don't put either one of you through the misery. Make sure both of your hearts and minds are together on this. I know you love each other – you have no idea how happy that makes me – but be sure. There are ways to make things work no matter how you decide to be together."

Bella stood, and I let my fingers and mind drift into the unnamed melody that she inspired. I heard her bend down and kiss Esme's cheek. "Thank you," she murmured. "But, Esme, I am sure. I've been lonely, too."

She moved hesitantly into the room where I continued to play, and Esme silently rose to return to the suite she and Carlisle shared. I turned my head slightly as Bella paused next to me, her eyes taking in my bare torso gleaming and subtly shimmering in the moonlight. Her hand came up to trail along the muscles in my arm as they bunched and flowed with my playing.

"I'm sorry I woke you," I told her softly, gazing into her eyes as I continued her song.

She simply shook her head, moving to stand behind me. I felt the gossamer light touch of her fingertips along the arch of my shoulders, and then the soft, warm press of her lips on my marble flesh. My fingers came to a disjointed halt on the keys in surprise, and I spun to face her. She smiled, a knowing, wise lift of her lips, shifting to stand between my parted legs. I instinctively brought my hands up to rest on her waist.

"I choose this," she said against my lips, moving closer to my body. "I choose you. Forever."

"Forever," I repeated in a low, gruff voice, heavy with emotion.

She lifted her knees, straddling me on the bench. I turned us in a swift, fluid motion so I could press her against the piano. I searched behind her with one hand and closed the lid over the keys as I reached for her mouth. She moaned as I pushed her back and settled my mouth to hers. Her legs rose to wrap around my hips and she undulated against me, bringing me up, hard and eager, into the cradle of her thighs.

"They'll hear," I reminded her in between hungry, feeding kisses.

She nipped gently at my lower lip and leaned back to give me that mysterious smile once again. "You've been on the other side long enough, listening. It's time to show them what _you_ can do, Champ."

A slow grin spread across my face, and I lifted her, setting her on the top of the piano. Her eyes never left mine, and with a little help she shimmied out of her thin cotton shorts and tank top. She slid up, leaning back on her elbows and spreading her legs. The air left my lungs in a rush as I caressed my way up from her ankle to her groin. She moaned, tossing her hair, and I dipped gently into her soft, wet sex.

My fingers were scorched by the heat of her body as I flicked and twisted them inside her. My thumb rubbed lazily against her clitoris, and I leaned forward to lay my head on her bare stomach. I could hear the blood rushing faster and faster through her body, her heartbeat take flight, the wet squelching noises my fingers were making inside of her. I closed my eyes and breathed her in, my head riding the twitching undulations of her hips as her hands tangled in my hair and held. I smiled, feeling her abdominal muscles fluttering under my cheek and then tensing as her back bowed and arched. She was gasping my name, over and over, sobbing and heaving air as her head twisted back and forth across the glossy surface of the piano.

I curled and dragged my fingertips across the particular spot I unerringly found in her slick flesh, the soft, spongy tissue that contained the most sensitive nerve endings inside her. I focused my attention there, touching, prodding, rubbing, stroking back and forth, across and over. I spread the moisture leaking from her over her clit, circling with my thumb, and she squealed, arching higher than before, almost dislodging my head from where I held it fast against her. I heard all of her bodily systems rising in tandem toward her orgasm, felt her straining, reaching, and begging for release. I turned my head slightly and pressed my mouth into the soft, resilient flesh of her belly, giving it to her, willing to give her anything she asked for. I pressed inside her, pushing against the little rise of flesh nestled between her thighs. She shrieked and jerked in tandem with the spasms pulsing through her until they were little more than moans, purrs, and shivering aftershocks. I smiled into her skin, wanting to permanently impress myself there, brushing my nose against her now moist flesh and inhaling her.

"Pretty proud of yourself, Cullen?" she managed to whisper, and I was proud of the fact she had to stop to clear her throat.

"Absolutely," I murmured, pressing a swift kiss to the soft, damp skin between her legs. She gasped in shock, and then again as I quickly loosened my sweatpants and dropped them to the floor around my ankles. I pulled her languid body toward me across the slick surface of the piano, pressing my erection to the bare, hot, wet juncture of her thighs.

"Edward!" she cried in astonishment, writhing helplessly, lifting her head to stare at me with wide, dazed eyes. "What are you -"

I held her legs fast, pulling her even harder to me, thrusting my cock against her scorching flesh. Her head fell back with a moan. "Oh, God, yes!" she hissed, hips gyrating, trying to get me inside her.

"No," I whispered grimly, desperately holding on to my rational mind. I had only so much control over the primitive impulse to take her, hard and fast, right here, right now. "Bella, hold still, please!"

She moaned again, her hips twitching slightly against me, but she stilled as best she could. I made a small rocking motion against her, practically shouting with the pleasure of the feel of her flesh finally against mine, just where I so desperately desired it. The wetness from her orgasm lubricated my frantic strokes, and I shook with the sensation and the struggle to keep my natural instincts from running rampant. An incredible and intense tension coiled through me, centering in my groin and shooting throughout my body before my consciousness finally shattered. I only barely managed to jerk away from her at the last moment with a roaring, strangled cry, coming in strong, arcing jets of iridescent venom onto the piano bench.

I leaned over her, once again pressing my cheek to her abdomen, breathing hard, my entire body trembling. Bursts of unbelievable sensation still pumped through me. I'd never experienced anything so blinding, so pleasurable, in my entire existence. Bella gave another purring moan, and I felt her fingertips stroking gently through my hair, rubbing my scalp and petting me. Eventually the breath stopped panting in and out of our lungs, and I slowly lifted my head to look at her. She was gazing at me, her eyes soft and liquid with unshed tears.

"I didn't hurt you, did I?" I asked, my eyes flickering over her, searching for signs of damage I may have inflicted on her breakable human body.

She sat up, holding onto my hair, and kissed me lingeringly. "No," she finally whispered. "No, Edward. You didn't hurt me at all. Thank you."

"You're thanking me for sex again," I said with a small, teasing smile.

"No." She met my gaze. "I'm thanking you for trusting yourself. And for trusting me. For accepting that you – and being like you – are truly what I want. You wouldn't have done this otherwise." Her hand brushed down to caress my bare hip.

It was my turn to kiss her gently, reverently. I bent down briefly to pull my sweatpants up and tie them at my waist. I grabbed her discarded clothes and picked her up in my arms, carrying her to the staircase and up to our room. She was so very perceptive, and I could no longer deny that it was something we both wanted very badly.

I prayed to the Gods I had given up long ago that she would be able to forgive me after I took her natural life. I made peace with myself, and once again worshipped the miracle before me.

**X-X-X-X-X**

It was very early when I heard Alice reach out for me, a vision dancing through her head and into mine. I rolled over in the bed carefully, not wanting to disturb Bella, and dressed quickly. I went downstairs to where Alice and Jasper were hunched over the computer on the desk in the main room.

"Alice, what -" I began.

"It's going to take some hacking," Jasper muttered, his fingers flying over the keys, "and probably a little breaking and entering, but Emmett'll be up for that, so no problem. I just need a copy of her picture ID."

"But -" I started again.

"Shush," Alice bade me, and more detailed scenes flitted through her mind. My head jerked back in surprise at what I saw.

"But we can't -"

"Yes, we can," Alice insisted, turning me and pushing me toward the stairs. "Let us deal with the paperwork and details. You've got other things to worry about." She nodded toward the upper level. "Don't worry, there's time."

Jasper let out a triumphant cackle and pumped his fist in the air before tapping rapidly at the keyboard again.

"You're sure?" I asked, still trying to process the visions dancing through Alice's head.

"Absolutely. You do your thing, and just show up. We'll have everything in place."

"If she says 'yes'."

Alice rolled her eyes and gave me a shove. "She's already said 'yes', bonehead. You've just got to make it official. Go on." She made shooing motions at me and turned back to where Jasper was back to muttering and swearing at the computer.

I climbed the stairs and opened the door to our room to find Bella sitting up in bed, sleepily running her hand through her hair.

"What time is it?" she asked, blinking at me. "You were gone."

I eased myself next to her on the bed, and she snuggled against me. "It's early yet," I told her. "You can sleep for a while longer if you'd like."

She rubbed her face on my chest and turned her head to look out the floor to ceiling windows that lined the back wall of the room. "I'd like to look around outside, if that's okay?" she said softly. "I didn't get to see much in the dark last night, and it looks beautiful."

"You don't have to ask," I assured her. "This is your home, now, too."

She smiled up at me. "You'll show me around?"

"Of course." I stood as she rolled out of bed and headed for the large bathroom. "Come down to the kitchen when you're ready. I'll see what Esme has for breakfast."

She paused in the doorway, looking back at me with a frown. "You need to eat, too, Edward."

I nodded. "I will. Later this afternoon or tonight."

She bit her lip, her eyes still on mine. "How long do we have?" she asked. "Before you…" she touched her neck.

I shut my eyes, but opened them after a brief moment to meet her gaze. "Not much," I admitted, "but enough. I'm thinking…tomorrow night."

She nodded and stepped into the bathroom.

By the time I returned to the main level, Alice and Jasper had left with Emmett and Rosalie. Carlisle and Esme had gone off to hunt, but Esme had set out a freshly baked coffee cake. The pantry held nothing of particular interest, except a box of Count Chocula cereal. I grinned and shook my head. Only Emmett…Opening the refrigerator – I think for the first time ever – I pulled out a carton of eggs. Bella did seem to enjoy the food, so I scrambled some for her while I waited.

She eventually made her way down the stairs, and ate her breakfast while I told her about the house and property. We owned quite a bit of acreage surrounding the house to ensure our privacy, and it was surrounded by forest land and wilderness. We walked out to the large, private lake that spread out behind the back lawn after she had finished her meal. I held her hand and marveled at the feeling of peace and serenity that engulfed me. It was such a dramatic change from the last time I had walked this path.

I led her down the trail that cut through the thick growth of trees, being careful with my steps so that she wouldn't stumble. It was a fairly short distance, even for a human, before the path ended in a small opening in the trees. A small stream bubbled through the center on its way to empty into the lake. Large moss-covered boulders lined one edge and delicate summer flowers littered the green carpet of grass. It was lit with diluted sun filtering through the trees, sparkling along the morning dew. Bella's breath caught and she stopped, looking around the private space.

"This is so pretty." She let go of my hand and walked over to the stream, bending to touch her fingers to the quicksilver surface. "Cold!" she laughed, shaking her hand and flicking droplets of water onto her jeans.

"Bella," I said softly and she came to me, unhesitating, sliding her arms around my waist and hugging me close.

"I'm so glad to be here with you, finally," she breathed. "It's so beautiful, and your family has been great."

"Your family now, too," I reminded her. I lifted her face and placed my lips against hers, kissing her softly. She had other ideas, of course, and stretched up on her tip-toes, sliding her hands up to curve around my shoulders and pull me toward her. I relaxed my stance, allowing her to bring me in closer, carefully threading my fingers in her hair and holding her still for my mouth. Her warm, mobile lips pressed, touched, and nipped along mine, and I filled myself with her scent.

"I love you," she breathed, eyes shut and inhaling deeply. Her tongue flicked out to lick my taste off of her lips, and I groaned, resting my forehead against hers.

"I love you, too," I returned. My hands ran along her shoulders and down her arms before taking both of her hands in mine. "You've given me light, Bella, and though I don't deserve you, I plan on keeping you forever." I lowered myself to one knee, and she stiffened. "So I'll ask you, even though I shouldn't. Will I be enough? Am I worth all you have to give up? Will you have me? Be sure, Bella, because forever has its own consequences here."

I kept my gaze steady on her as her eyes filled with tears. She cupped my face tenderly in her hands and leaned down to kiss my lips.

"I'll have you," she told me, her voice surprisingly steady. "I choose you, every time. I know my heart, Edward, and it's yours."

I closed my eyes in relief, ecstasy, dread, and wonder. Her fingertips traced my cheekbones, under my eyes, and across my lower lip. I felt her mouth press warmly, gently to my forehead, and I looked at my salvation. Her hands gripped mine, hard, and I released one to reach into the pocket of my jeans to pull out my mother's ring. Her hands trembled, betraying her rapidly thrumming heart as I slipped the circle of metal and gems onto her slender finger.

We both stared at it for a few seconds. I didn't know what was going through her mind, but the sheer sense of satisfaction and rightness that flooded me made me gasp. I pressed my forehead to the back of her hand.

"Thank you," I said humbly. "I promise you, I will do everything in my power to make you happy and safe. I can't promise you won't regret it, but -"

"We won't speak of regrets," she broke in, gently but firmly. "Not today. Not ever, hopefully, but especially not today. I don't regret one single minute since I met you, and I never will."

She took a step back and tugged gently on my hands, bringing me to my feet. Holding on to me, she walked over to a patch of sunlight and held the ring up to the bright light. It glittered and shone, and she smiled, closing her hand into a fist.

"Mine," she said, reaching up to place that hand on my face. "Mine," she repeated with a delighted smile.

"Always," I assured her moving forward until she came up against the mossy boulder. I bent my head and kissed her.

The bubbling of the stream mingled with the sounds of her increased breathing and our mouths moving across each other. I leaned into her, pressing her carefully between the hard stone and my hard body. "God, I want you," I muttered, and locked our mouths together again.

"Soon," she gasped when we finally parted. "Ah, God, soon…"

I brought our intertwined hands up to hold them on either side of her head, my finger rubbing over the ring banded on hers. I couldn't help the quick press of my erection against her, but was able to somehow pull away. I was going to have to take care of that, and soon. Bella brought her hands down and hugged them around my waist, her head fitting perfectly under my chin as we held each other. I felt her sigh and tipped my head to see her face.

"What's wrong?" I asked at the sight of her worrying her lip between her teeth.

She shook her head. "Nothing. This is just…everything I've ever wanted. It's just…I wish…"

"What?" I asked, starting to worry. Whatever it was, if it was in my power to give her, I would.

She met my gaze with a sad smile. "I just wish my dad could know how happy I am. I know I won't be able to see him…after, but I just think if he saw me – us – and how happy I am with you, and he knew that this was all I ever wanted…It would make it easier when I don't see him…for a while."

I watched her face, the rest of Alice's visions from this morning suddenly becoming clear.

"I mean, I know I don't see him all that often, what with me traveling and living in Paris right now, but…" Bella continued. "I don't know." She shrugged with a crooked smile.

"Bella," I said slowly. "Do you want to go see your father?"

She jerked in surprise, her eyes narrowing on mine. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, do you want to go visit your father? Forks isn't that far; we could drive up there this afternoon. You could introduce me to him, and we can tell him the news." I stroked the ring that sat securely on her finger.

Her breathing picked up in excitement. "Really? Do you think we could…really?"

"Yes. We've got time, if we go today."

She started patting her pockets. "I don't have my cell phone; would it even work out here? Do you have yours?"

"It's at the house." I reached for her hand. "Come on, let's head back. You can call and see what you can arrange, and we'll drive up to see him."


	19. Chapter 18: Fiercely Held Her Fast

**For anyone who still needs to hear it - Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight, not me. Just please don't copy anything in this little story, they're just words, but they're mine.**

**Sarahsumbrella and silentnc beta this for me - and do a fantastic job. Huzzah!**

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**CHAPTER EIGHTEEN: Fiercely Held Her Fast**

Bella had been able to get in touch with her father, Charlie, and made arrangements to meet him at his house in Forks. To say he was surprised to find out she was in the States was an understatement, but he was delighted at being able to see her. She didn't explain much over the phone, just that she was in Washington and wanted to bring her boyfriend with her to meet him. He was working a shift at the police station, but being Chief had its advantages, and he was able to arrange for the afternoon off. I had her tell him we were already on our way, knowing I would make the approximately two hour drive in much less time.

The look of delight and amazement on her face when I took her to the garage and she saw my Aston Martin Vanquish S sitting in its spot, gleaming and shouting pure sex with its smooth lines, was priceless. She squealed and ran her hands over the hood before dashing to the passenger side door and climbing inside.

"This is yours? Really?"

"Yeah." I grinned, getting in the driver's side.

"The first thing I am going to do after I'm indestructible is take this beautiful thing out and drive," she said, rolling around in the seat and running her hands over the soft leather.

"The very first thing?" I asked with a mocking lift of my brow, turning the engine over and she groaned at the sound.

"As close to the first thing as I am able," she teased back, running a hand up and down my thigh now. Who knew a fine piece of engineering could turn her on so much?

"This is like the one you had in Italy," she said, peering curiously at the dash.

"That one was the Volturi's – it was a DB9," I told her. "This one is all mine. It's a Vanquish."

"All _ours_," she emphasized, and I grinned again. If it took her coveting my baby for her to start acknowledging what was mine was now hers, I was all for it.

We made it to Forks rather quickly. I had made the drive in less time, but with human Bella in the vehicle with me I didn't want to push our luck. She directed me through the modest town and into a neighborhood of older but well-kept homes. Her father's house was a modest white two story with a narrow front porch. There was an empty lot on one side, and a small copse of trees on the other.

"Home sweet home," Bella said, getting out of the car. She paused, standing in the open door, one hand on it and one hand on the roof. "It's been a while since I've been here. Last time was right after Renee passed away."

I walked over to her and took her hand, leaning down for a quick kiss. "Let's hope this is a happier occasion."

"Let's hope so," she said, grinning at me as she led me up the front walk. "You are bulletproof, right?"

I laughed, shaking my head at her. A tall, broad, dark figure stood just inside the screen door, peering out at us.

_Some sort of international playboy._ I heard the disparaging thought as her father took in the outrageous car in the driveway, what he considered my too-good-looking face, and impeccable clothes. _What's Bells doing with him?_

"Dad!" Bella squealed, letting go of my hand to rush to him as he opened the door.

He swept her up into his arms, squeezing tight and shutting his eyes in happiness at seeing his daughter. After a few seconds he opened one eye to send me a hard, appraising glare. I had to admit it was pretty impressive, especially with only one eye.

"It's good to see you, Bells. This is an unexpected surprise," he said, letting go so she could stand back on her own two feet.

She smiled happily, turning to me. "Dad, this Edward Cullen. Edward, my dad, Charlie Swan."

"Hello, Chief Swan. It's a pleasure to meet you," I said, holding out my hand.

"Edward." He shook it briefly, firmly, and unconsciously clenched it at his side from the chill temperature of mine. Other than a quick acknowledgement of the coolness in his mind, however, he dismissed the fact with the typical cliché. _Cold hands_, he thought fleetingly. _Hope he doesn't have a cold heart._

Bella slid an arm around my waist, a fact that did not go unnoticed by her father. "So, have you two been seeing each other for very long?" he asked, appraising me once again and not bothering to hide the fact.

I looked down at Bella. She was scowling at her father. "Yeah, for a while, Dad. I met him in Paris. His family lives in Hoquiam, though. Isn't that a great coincidence?"

He grunted, his cop eyes still judging me. "How come you haven't mentioned him before?"

Bella rolled her eyes. "Come on, Dad, like we talk about men."

He grunted again, but this time with humor. "I sure wasn't expecting you here," he said speculatively. "Not that I'm complaining – it's great to see you, O Traveling One – but isn't it the middle of the semester?"

"Can we…I don't know? Sit down?" Bella asked, leading me into the front room.

Charlie stiffened suspiciously and followed us. Bella pulled me down next to her on the sofa while her father took a seat in what I could tell was his usual chair, facing us.

"He thinks you're…well, you know," I said in a soft voice only she could hear, gesturing toward her abdomen.

"What? Oh. Oh!" She spun to face him, still clutching my hand. Charlie's eyes had narrowed and followed every movement of mine. He'd seen the gesture. "No! Dad, I'm not pregnant!"

He relaxed only slightly. "Okay…?"

Bella took a deep breath and I could hear her heart pounding. She gave me a shaky smile and turned back to her father, bringing our hands forward. She untwined her fingers from mine and held out her left hand. The ring sparkled and shot light around the small room.

"We came back to Washington, well, to see our families. Dad, we're engaged. We're going to be married. I wanted to tell you in person so you could meet Edward and see how happy I am. Uh, Dad?"

He sat perfectly still in his chair, his face slowly turning red. "Married?" It came out in a strangled voice.

"Um, yeah." She turned to me, eyes wide and questioning. I shrugged; the thoughts racing through his mind right now were too garbled and incoherent for me to follow.

"You're too young!" he finally growled.

She stiffened beside me with indignation. "I'm twenty years old! And I've been on my own since…since forever! I love him, and we're getting married!"

He fixed his laser gaze on me. "And what do you have to say for yourself?"

Bella went rigid and started to speak. I put my hand on her arm, stroking down its length gently. Sshe stilled, biting her lip. I faced her father. He'd been watching my movements closely, and his eyes shot back up to my face, softening somewhat at Bella's reaction to my touch.

"Sir, I know this seems sudden, and I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry you and I didn't get a chance to know each other first, so you would know my intentions. I love Bella, Chief Swan. She's the best part of me. I know I don't deserve her – I'm well aware of that – but I swear, she'll be safe with me and no one could feel any more strongly about her beautiful soul than I do."

Bella' breathing deepened beside me, but I kept my gaze on her father. "I can take care of her. I'm lucky enough to be well-off financially; there are no worries there. We'll be traveling a lot, but Bella enjoys that. "

He sat, staring, contemplating me with narrowed eyes. "What about school?"

I looked down at Bella, taking her hand in mine again. "I think she should finish as soon as she's ready."

"As soon as she's ready?" he repeated angrily, sitting forward in the chair. "What does that mean?"

"It means I plan on going back to school. I took a leave of absence for now – there are so many things going on – " her hand tightened almost imperceptibly on mine, " – and I want to get everything settled and enjoy being with Edward, take advantage of all the things we have going on together. I'll go back and pick up where I left off next year. I swear."

Charlie sat quietly, but I could sense his thoughts had calmed. A small grin curved his mouth under the thick mustache. "Well, I never did see what good a Literature degree was going to do you, anyway. I guess it won't hurt to put it off for a while."

"Oh, Dad." Bella jumped off of the sofa and ran to him, throwing herself into his lap and hugging him hard. In his own way, he'd just given us his blessing.

Charlie held her, rocking gently, his cheek on her head and eyes closed. When they opened to focus on me they were suspiciously moist. "So, when's the wedding?"

Bella sat up, rubbing at the trail of tears on her cheeks. She looked at me from under her wet lashes. "Um, I'm not exactly sure. We were planning on heading back to Paris tomorrow. Edward has business to take care of and I -"

"Tomorrow!" Charlie exclaimed. "What's the rush? You just got here. Didn't you?" He frowned at her.

"Well, yeah, but…we thought we'd get married somewhere in Europe, when we had a free weekend or something…" her voice trailed off and she looked at me frantically. She obviously had not been expecting to address the idea of the actual wedding with her father.

"In Europe?" he questioned. "Why? Didn't you say you had family here in Hoquiam?" he asked me. "Why wouldn't you get married here, where you both have family?" No one missed the emphasis he put on "both".

"Um, well…" Bella was at a loss.

"Actually," I started, smiling to myself as I began to make Alice's vision a reality. Thank god for Jasper's computer hacking and Emmett's breaking and entering skills. "We did file a marriage application a few days ago in Grays Harbor County."

They both stared at me, Charlie with interest, Bella with open-mouthed shock.

"We did?"

"You did?"

They both said it at the same time. Charlie turned his head to look at Bella quizzically. She was staring at me in surprise.

"Don't you remember, sweetheart?" I said, looking at her pointedly, hoping she got the hint to play along. "We notarized your signature on the application, and I took them down to the county seat a couple of days ago. It was before you arrived from Paris." I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Oh." She narrowed hers right back at me. "I didn't know you'd actually taken them down and filed them." Charlie didn't notice the emphasis she put on "you".

He looked back and forth between us. "So, what does that mean?"

I kept my eyes on hers. "It means we can get married in front of our families before we have to…leave. A quick ceremony now, so our loved ones can be with us. We can do something more involved later, if you wish."

She didn't take her gaze from me, searching my face. I wanted to share the event with our families, but more personally, I wanted to make her mine in all the ways that counted. I wanted her to belong to me before I had to change her. It wasn't entirely rational, but the desire was strong.

"Do you think we could get a judge or justice to perform the ceremony with this short of notice?" she asked. "Today? Or maybe tomorrow morning?"

"Is that what you want?" I asked her. It was what I wanted, but… "If you aren't ready, or not sure, or have your heart set on a fancy wedding, we can wait."

Her eyes filled and she nodded her head. She let go of her father and came to me. "Yes. It's what I want. Let's do it now, as soon as possible. I have my heart set on you, Edward."

I held her close for a moment, until Charlie coughed uncomfortably. I sent him an apologetic smile and pulled my phone out of my pocket. "Let me call the courthouse and my dad. Let's see what we can do."

**X-X-X-X-X**

And that is how I ended up marrying Isabella Marie Swan on a rainy afternoon in June at the Grays Harbor County District Courthouse. Judge Long performed the civil ceremony in front of our families. Carlisle and Bella's father stood as official witnesses as she became Bella Cullen. It was a small event that I imagine was nothing more than a blip on the radar screen of Judge Long's day, but it meant the world to me. It was the first step in making this woman mine for eternity, and the easiest. The next few steps were going to take some doing.

The ride down to the courthouse in Montesano from Forks had been quite an adventure. The three of us rode down together in the small cab of Charlie's pickup, as the Aston did not have a rear seat, and Bella flatly refused to go in Charlie's police cruiser.

"I'm not driving to my wedding with my future husband behind a cage," she stated unequivocally.

Charlie had laughed and eyed me speculatively, but in the end we took his personal vehicle. It had been close quarters, but closeness, in this case, helped breed familiarity. Charlie grilled me subtly without ever having appeared to have done so, and by the end of the approximately two-hour drive I think we were on much better terms. Bella had been stroking my leg in an effort to calm me at the slow, legal-speed-limit-pace the Chief drove. I thought it might offend him, but her obvious affection and attention towards me seemed to settle things in his mind.

Alice had thoughtfully brought us both a change of clothes, knowing Bella wouldn't want to be married in jeans. She had included one of my old suits along with a pretty, champagne tinted, simple dress that flattered Bella's coloring and figure. She also brought with her another small box at my request.

"I'm starting to feel like your jewelry pimp, Edward," she teased with a wink.

The clerks provided us with a small, private break room so that we didn't have to change in the restroom. I took Bella aside while we waited for the judge, holding out the small, flat box.

"It's for you," I told her when she just stared at it.

"When did you have time to get me anything?" she wondered, taking it from my palm and opening the lid. "Oh! Edward, it's lovely."

The jeweled dragonfly floated on soft white cotton. Her finger traced the delicate lines and curves and she leaned up to kiss me. "Thank you. Put it on for me?"

I carefully pinned it to the bodice of her gown, just under the neckline and above her left breast. The back of my fingers brushed her warm, bare skin. She gazed down at it with a smile and kissed me again. "When did you get this?"

"When we got your dress for the event at the Musee. Madame L'Heureaux showed it to me, and it reminded me of you. I would have given it to you that night, but you were already annoyed about the dress. I didn't want to freak you out any more than you already were." My mouth quirked at the memory.

"You've had it with you this whole time?" she questioned in surprise.

"Well, yeah." I shrugged. "It's small. It fit in the backpack easily enough."

She smiled. "I love you, Edward Cullen. Let's go get hitched."

After the ceremony, we all stood in the main entrance of the court building. It was only slightly awkward. Charlie had initially been taken aback by my family's unusual beauty – as were most humans – but was now listening to Alice chatter with a bemused expression on his face. She had wrapped the Chief around her tiny little finger like she did with most beings.

"Well, should we go celebrate?" Carlisle finally offered with a shrug and raised brow toward me. It was what would be socially expected with humans, but slightly awkward for our group, seeing how most of us did not eat human food.

I turned to Bella – my _wife – _and saw the sadness on her face as she looked at her father. I took her hand and led her aside. "Do you want to stay with your father tonight, Bella? Spend some time with him?" _Before you can't anymore_, were the unspoken words.

"I'm not spending my wedding night alone!" she told me forcefully, but her eyes went longingly to her father. I stroked her hair, frowning, not wanting to see the sadness in her eyes. "Could we…I mean, would you…spend the night at my dad's with me?"

"Of course," I whispered, pressing my lips to the top of her head and loving this woman more with each passing minute.

She smiled tremulously, squeezing my hand, and turned to her father. "Dad, since Edward and I are leaving tomorrow night, would it be okay if we spent tonight with you?"

He looked shocked, his gaze flying to mine. "Yeah, yes, of course. But, um, are you sure you want to spend your wedding night, your first night married, with your dad? In Forks?"

Bella blushed and shot a quick glance at me. "We were planning on taking a few days in Europe for a honeymoon. I don't know…" her voice broke slightly, "I don't know when we'll be able to get back, Dad. I'd love to spend tonight with you, too."

He nodded with a smile. We parted from my family with well wishes and made the drive back to Forks. We went to one of their favorite spots for dinner, Charlie actually teasing me about not being hungry due to bridegroom jitters. There was no way to avoid sharing a couple of beers with him when we returned to the house, however, and I manfully drank up as we stayed up late into the night talking, laughing, and sharing Bella's childhood stories.

It finally got late enough for both humans to be tired. Charlie stood up, rubbing his hands on his thighs uncomfortably. "Um, Bells, there's only your bedroom. I guess, since you're married," he grinned at her, "you can share that twin bed, if you're brave enough. Otherwise, I guess we can make up the couch."

"Edward is not sleeping on the couch," she said firmly, taking my hand. "We'll make do."

I hid a smile behind a small cough at Charlie's thoughts. He was thinking that the bed was likely too small for both of us to do anything even remotely sexual, but that I looked inventive. Bella shot me a quick look and blushed. I could only guess why and be glad she couldn't hear her father's thoughts.

"Goodnight, Bells. I'm glad I could share this with you," he said softly, taking her small form in a hug. He let her go and turned to me, extending a hand. I took it, and he pulled me into an awkward hug, too. "You'll take care of her." It wasn't quite a question or a demand.

"Yes, sir," I whispered, looking him in the eye and gripping his hand as firmly as I dared. "You can count on it."

"Good," he said gruffly, nodding. He gave one last smile to Bella and headed upstairs.

"What was that about?" Bella asked when he was out of hearing range.

"He loves you," I told her, taking her into my arms and kissing her softly. "I love you, too."

"Good. Mm." She pulled away slightly with a quirky frown. "You taste like you and beer."

"Hmm, I'll have to take care of that and eat later. Right now I need to take care of my wife." I lifted her into my arms and carried her up the stairs.

"You're going to go eat?" she asked, concern leaking into her voice.

"I'll go while you're asleep, and be back before you know I was gone," I murmured. "The Olympic National Forest is very close by."

She nodded, but concern still knotted her features. I opened her bedroom door with one hand and carried her over to the small bed that had been hers since childhood. I dropped her down and crawled over her, bracing myself on my arms, spreading her legs with my knees to settle lightly between them.

"Hello, Bella Cullen," I whispered. A dark, intense thrill shot through me, bringing me to instant, aching hardness.

"Hello, Edward Cullen," she teased in return, lifting her pelvis to rub against my straining erection.

Charlie ended up being right, after all. I was _very_ inventive.


	20. Chapter 19: Within His Little Parlour

**SM owns, not me - hasn't changed. Don't copy this story, though, it's mine and that's stealing, so low class.**

**My most excellent betas silentnc and Sarahsumbrella, you betcha, you're the best. Trust me, they're awesome.**

**The period button on my keyboard has been sticking. :( All kinds of badness, that.**

* * *

**CHAPTER NINETEEN: Within His Little Parlour**

I sat in the Vanquish, giving Bella some privacy to say good-bye to her father. I'd given the typical assurances, hating that most were lies. Bella would probably be able to write and e-mail, and eventually, perhaps, call, but it was likely she would never be able to visit her father in person again. The changes to her physical body would be too great, let alone the behavioral and mental changes. It would be a very long time until she would be able to interact closely with any humans. I closed my eyes and fought back the conflict of desire and agony the thought of changing her always caused.

My eyes flew open, and I got out of the car to open her door when I heard their final good-bye. I searched her face, feeling the frustration of not being able to search her mind. Her cheeks were tear-streaked and her eyes red, but she managed a smile and soft "thanks" for me as she settled into the car.

I turned and met Charlie's eyes – they were in similar condition – and with a brief, meaningful nod and wave, I got in behind the wheel. Bella turned in her seat and waved at her father until he was out of sight, and then slumped in the leather seat with a loud, shaky exhale.

"Wow. That was harder than I thought."

"Bella," I began miserably, putting my cool hand on her jean-clad knee. "I'm so sorry."

She covered my hand with hers. "Edward, don't. It's okay. I'd have to say good-bye after getting married anyway, no matter what the circumstance."

"Bella…"

"Edward," she returned with a glimmer of her usual smile. "Just shut up, okay?"

I nodded grimly. We hit open road, and I opened the car up, the responsive machine leaping forward at the touch of the pedals. Bella didn't seem to notice.

"I guess we should talk about tonight," she said softly. She took a deep breath, and I watched her worriedly. "That is, if you can talk about it without going berserk."

"Bella," I gritted from between my teeth. "It's no joking matter. You have no idea how terrified I am." My hands tightened on the steering wheel, and I made a desperate grab for control before I caused any irreparable damage. "You have no idea of how many things can go wrong. I know what you are about to go through, and I can't bear to think about it. I'd do anything in my power to spare you that, if I could."

"I know," she said. "But just think, after those three measly days, I'll be yours for eternity."

I turned my desolate eyes to hers. "That's the only thing that makes it possible for me to even think about. And it's so fucking _selfish_!"

"It's not selfish if I want it, too." Her voice was quiet as she stared at me. "And I do, Edward. I want it. I choose it. And I know it will be painful, I know it's going to be a horrible experience, but the alternative? That's what I can't bear."

I swallowed venom. I stared out the front window at the road flashing by, and brought my mind back to where it needed to be. I nodded curtly.

"Okay?" she asked. I nodded again. "So, what are you thinking? How are we going to do this?"

"It will have to be at the house. There's a room downstairs where we'll be safe. Secure. Carlisle will need to be there, and probably Emmett, just in case I…in case I…" I couldn't continue. I sensed the fiery blush spread across her face. "What?"

"Um, I just didn't expect there would be someone else there with us," she said, and I glanced at her in confusion. The blush deepened. "Uh, I was actually kind of thinking that…well, you'd do it while we were…you know…or afterward…"

"After what?" I asked, completely confused.

"I kind of thought maybe we would make love, you know, _really_ make love, at least once, before you changed me," she admitted softly.

"No!" I shouted forcefully, and she shrank back in shock. I took a couple of deep, shuddering breaths, trying to calm myself. Her scent scorched through my heightened senses and pretty much did the opposite. "No," I repeated finally, my control coming back in slow degrees.

"Why not?" she whispered miserably.

"Bella." I shook my head and tried again. "Bella, there are a couple of reasons. You've never done that, have you? Had intercourse – made love?" She shook her head. "I don't want to ruin that for you. I don't want either one of us to ever associate something that amazing with something so awful, so painful." She nodded, understanding on her face. "And…" I took a deep breath again. "When I have you for the first time, it's going to be…I won't be able to help it being…kind of…crazy."

"Crazy?" she asked on barely a breath, staring at me.

"You'll understand when you're changed. Vampires, when they mate, well, they _mate_. The feelings, the overwhelming desire…" I shuddered. "You have no idea how hard it's been to control myself. Control the urge to take you. God, take both your blood and your body. It's been extremely difficult." I chuckled mirthlessly at that classic understatement. "I don't want to hurt you, and I most certainly will if I make love to you while you're human. That I do know for a fact. I may be able to control my bloodlust when I change you, but there is no way in hell I'd be able to control my _lust_ if I have you."

I made myself stop and look at her, wondering if I had shocked her into fear or disgust. For some unknown, maddening reason, she was smiling. Grinning. She rubbed her face and actually giggled. I stared at her in concern.

"Jesus, _Jesus_, Edward, pull over!" Startled, I swung the car over to the deserted side of the road. Trees stretched along the roadway for miles

My entire body tightened in dread. I'd finally done it. I'd finally broken her. She was leaving me here in the middle of nowhere. The crushing pain was one thousand times worse than anything I've ever experienced.

She launched herself at me. She grunted in pain, colliding with the console between the seats. Somehow she managed to wriggle over it in the small space and pull herself onto my lap. Her hands fisted in my hair and her mouth was on mine. I sat still, stunned into immobility, until I felt the lick of her tongue between my lips. I yanked my head back in surprise.

"Do you think you can just say stuff like that to me and not do anything about it?" she panted, her eyes glazed and focused on my mouth. "Christ, Edward!" Her head dipped back to mine.

"You mean…" She was crawling up my torso, her hands and legs scrabbling for purchase as she tried to crush her mouth against mine. I gently took her face in my hands and held her still. "I didn't scare you?"

She opened her eyes slowly. "Only if you stop." She grabbed my hand and thrust it in between her thighs. A long, low groan of satisfaction broke from her chest as she leaned back as far as the steering wheel would allow – which was hardly at all. I watched in fascination as she writhed, her mounting frustration evident as there wasn't enough room to allow for the stimulation she wanted. I twisted the button off her jeans and tore the zipper apart, and when that still didn't give me enough room to work my hand, I tore the jeans down the front.

She moaned and bucked her hips toward me. I teased my fingertips along the sodden, swollen folds between her legs and caressed the turgid flesh. I stroked and pumped my fingers, watching in awe as she rode my hand. She came with a shout, arching back and banging her head on the windshield. Her cries gradually slowed to content purring as she slumped forward against me, lying against my chest, panting and absently stroking my arm.

"I'm sorry," she finally murmured. "I know you just got done telling me how difficult it is for you, and I…jump you. I'm sorry, Edward. I'm taking your strength for granted. But…Jesus. You just can't sit there and look like that, look like you do, and _say_ those kinds of things to me."

I kissed her ear. "It's okay. You're welcome to take whatever you need. I'll let you know if it's too much." I shifted slightly under her, and she straightened. Her hips rubbed mine searchingly and her eyes widened as she felt me beneath her. "Sorry," I said apologetically. "It doesn't just go away. No circulatory system."

Her eyes widened even more. "So, it just stays like that, until…"

"Yeah." I shrugged ruefully and looked away. I made to get out of the car, meaning to go take care of myself. There was no way I could make it through the day, let alone the next few minutes, like this.

"Wait! Where are you going?" She grabbed at my arm before I could get up, and I stilled.

"Bella," I groaned in embarrassment, stilling the urge to thrust my hips up against hers.

"Are you going to…going to..?" she made an unconscious jerking motion with her hand, and I wanted to disappear in a fog of mortification. Never mind that she was my wife. I nodded shortly.

She bit her lip, blood creeping through her cheeks and looking up at me from under her lashes. "Don't go," she said. "Let me."

"_What_?"

"I want to do it." The blush still covered her cheeks, but she met my gaze directly. "I know you can't make love to me properly, but at least let me help." She licked her lips, and as depraved and wrong as I knew it to be, I couldn't help it. My cock swelled to epic proportions. I kept my eyes on hers as I slowly unzipped my pants, knowing this was wrong, still fighting the belief she shouldn't get any part of her that close to my venom, but…I knew there was no avoiding exposing her to it – and a lot of it – very soon, so…how bad could it be, to let her do this now…? Was I trying to convince myself against my better judgment? Yes, yes, I was.

She kept her eyes on mine as she reached into the loosened waist of my pants, pulling my engorged shaft out of my briefs. Her gaze wavered and she bit her lip again. She tried to bring her eyes back to mine, I could see her struggling, but she finally gave up and watched as her soft hands stroked me to a shouting, shuddering orgasm. I couldn't help it, I couldn't last – the feel of her small fingers, her hot little palm wrapped around my sensitive cock, rubbing and caressing from root to tip, over and around the swollen head, sent me quickly over the edge. I never imagined such searing ecstasy was possible, and I couldn't even begin to fathom what being inside her would be like.

When my head stopped whirling and my eyes settled back into their sockets, I realized she was reaching toward the shimmering, translucent venom roping across my lower abdomen. My hand flashed out instinctively and gripped her wrist until it had completely evaporated a few seconds later.

"You feel amazing, Edward," she said, leaning forward and kissing me. Our lips met in quiet satisfaction, and I allowed my tongue to gently trace the outline of her lips before dipping and pressing briefly at the seam. She gasped at the sensation, and I tasted the full potency of her soft, wet essence. I listened to her thundering heart, resting my forehead against hers, squeezing my eyes shut at the bolt of desire for her blood and her body that shot through me until it eased.

I refastened my pants and carefully lifted her over the console to set her into her seat. I watched with a smile as she tried to cover herself with the remnants of her shredded jeans.

She smirked at me. "Drafty." I traced my cold fingertip along the exposed sliver of her soft belly, and she shivered. "Don't start again," she warned with a meaningful look at my lap, tugging her sweater down over her hips.

I laughed, amazed I could do so after the mess of the previous conversation and what loomed before us at the house in Hoquiam. I started the car and turned on the defogging system to clear the steamy windows.

"Never been to third base in an Aston Martin," she commented as I swung back onto the road.

I slanted her a look. "Not many people have, I imagine. Or would even want to try."

We stopped for lunch when we reached the outskirts of Hoquiam. I asked what she felt like eating, and after a few minutes of consideration she asked for Mexican. "I want something spicy, and sweet, and a really strong margarita. Or two."

There was a small, hole-in-the-wall cantina that was reputed to have fabulous Mexican food downtown, so I had Bella find it on my phone's GPS. She had a variety of rather unappetizing looking and strong smelling foods, a heaping plate of sopapillas drenched in honey, and three very strong margaritas. The waitress took one look at my face and didn't dare card her. She gulped down the last of her drink, sucking on the ice cubes, and I watched in fascinated disgust.

"Hot," she said, sticking her tongue out and fanning her hand over it. She laughed at my expression and drained the very last of the alcohol.

By the time we made it back to the house it was late afternoon. A hazy drizzle wafted from the grey sky, and Bella paused on the porch, inhaling deeply. "Edward."

"Yes?" I turned to face her, taking her hands.

"I want to do this now. As soon as you can make the arrangements – whatever it is you need." I stiffened and jerked back, but she followed, taking my hand again. "Just listen. I'm ready, and the longer we wait, the more I'm just going to get worked up – and you, too. I've got a good buzz going, I'm happy, I'm relaxed, and we need to do this before you can freak us both out."

"Freak out?" I stalled, raising a disdainful brow.

She returned the look knowingly. I turned from her, shoving my hands in my pockets. She stepped close, running her hands up and down my back before pressing her body against mine and wrapping her arms around my waist from behind.

"Edward. Please."

I choked back a gasp, hunching my shoulders. Slowly, I brought my hands to cover hers where they rested on my waist, clasped around my hips. I hung my head, eyes closed, and absorbed the last of her warmth I would ever feel. As much as I wanted to argue with her, she was right. There was no point in waiting, in putting it off. The longer we waited, the more excuses I would find, and the danger the Volturi represented to all of us would only grow. A sick, thick feeling constricted my throat, but I struggled with my fear and waited until I was sure no sign of it would be apparent on my features.

"Let's go inside," I said softly. "I need to find Carlisle and Emmett."

I turned, and she stared up into my face. She leaned up on her toes as I lowered my head for her gentle kiss. She nodded, taking my hand and turning to enter the house.

She went upstairs – for some reason she wanted to shower – while I went in search of Carlisle. I could sense him in his study, and knew Alice, Rose, and Esme were not on the property. I was somewhat surprised, however, to hear both Emmett and Jasper in the room with him.

"Knock, knock," I said dryly, leaning in the doorway. I looked at Jasper. "It's not a very wise idea."

He shrugged. "Alice," was all he said, and I heard in their minds that Alice had foreseen Bella's request – of course. She'd left with Rose and Esme, and had the others wait for me here. I was surprised she thought it was a good idea for Jasper to be here, though. He had the hardest time with the vegetarian lifestyle, having fed on humans for longer than any of us, even me. Human blood was a much greater temptation to him, and any doubts about his control would only add to my stress.

"If it gets to be too much, I'll leave," he said quietly. "But if I can help you, with your emotions…" he shrugged, and I nodded. I had to trust him to be able to leave, and I did trust Emmett to stop him if he couldn't.

"So, she wants to do it now," I said softly. 'I have to agree – waiting will only make it worse for both of us."

They all rose to their feet, moving toward where I stood in the doorway. Carlisle put his hand on my shoulder as I met his compassionate eyes. "You can do this, Edward."

I tipped my head noncommittally, not willing to affirm or deny. I had no idea, or belief, in either right now. It all seemed varying degrees of awful. The appalling conflict was rising in me again – my desire to have her with me, always, invulnerable, and the absolute dread I felt in performing this irreversible ritual, the fear of having her eventually hate me for taking her human life. Added to that was the terror I felt at the mere thought of the scent, the taste of her blood, the flavor of it in my mouth, on my tongue, rolling down my throat. I knew I could stop, I knew I could never hurt her, take her existence through my greed, but…what if? What if it was too much? What if my strength wasn't enough, my control not as steady as I thought? Could I bear to take that even infinitesimal chance with Bella's continued existence?

Jasper sent a wave of calm toward me, casting a look at Carlisle and Emmett. "He's freaking himself out," he murmured to the other two.

"Just let Carlisle do it, Edward. You know he can," Emmett said impatiently. "You won't have to worry about it."

"No!" I almost roared, whirling on my brother. Just like that my divergent thoughts snapped together. The overwhelming fury that ripped though me at the thought of someone else's mouth, teeth, venom on my mate, even my father's, burned away any doubt that I would be the one to change Bella, that I could, and would, perform the depraved act myself. I trembled, fighting for calm, fighting for stillness, but my body shuddered as primal instinct was let loose. I was incapable of claiming her as human impulse demanded; I was no longer human. I was a male vampire, and would claim my mate with those dominant instincts. I couldn't plant my seed in her, but I would give her my venom.

"No," I managed more calmly. "This is mine to do." I realized how utterly true the words were as they left my mouth. Bella was the bravest soul I knew, willing to go through with this horrific ordeal, to give up everything she knew for all that she didn't. I would hide my cowardice, any hint of doubt, and be worthy of her courage and faith.

Carlisle nodded with a reassuring – and proud? – smile, as if he were the one reading my mind. They made their way down into the basement while I waited for Bella in the foyer, willing my mind not to dwell on all the things that could go wrong. I concentrated on her, how I loved her, on having her indestructible and constant, beside me always.

She came down the stairs in her bare feet, shivering slightly in soft cotton shorts and a tank top. I held my hand out to her and she took it firmly, letting me lead her to the small door under the stairs that was undetectable to the human eye. I opened it and escorted her through, pausing to secure the door behind us. Soft light illuminated the stairs as we descended, coming from the open room at the bottom.

Carlisle stood unobtrusively along one wall with Emmett and Jasper. They studiously looked away as I sat her on the high bed in the center of the room. She crawled up to the middle of the soft expanse, turning to pull her knees up and take my hand. I sat next to her, staring at where her fingers twined with mine.

"Edward," she whispered shakily, and I raised my face to hers. Tears shimmered along her lashes, and my heart broke. "I'm so sorry you have to go through this. I can only imagine how I'd feel if it were you."

"You're sorry?" I choked. "Oh, Bella…Bella…" My throat worked, but I couldn't speak. I felt as though someone had shot me in the chest, and I convulsed with the pain, the agony I knew was coming.

"Shh." She stroked my cheek. "You can do this, Edward. I know you can. I know you are going to do everything you can for me. I love you, and I can't wait to wake up and be able to stand by your side, forever."

I could only nod, overwhelmed by her and what I was about to do. She humbled me with her faith, in my strength, my control, my love, but I knew the truth. Bella was so much braver than I, so much stronger. She was everything.

"I love you, Bella. I'll be right here, waiting for you. I won't leave you. Not ever, not even for a second."

"I know." She kissed me and lay back on the white sheets, never taking her eyes from mine. They were warm and swimming with love, with trust, with certainty. There was not a shred of doubt in her gaze.

I stretched out next to her, felt her fine, unconscious trembling, and held her. It was easy to ignore the others and concentrate on every heart beat, every breath, and the blood that coursed through the woman beside me. After a while her tense body relaxed somewhat and she turned on her side to face me, burying her face in my neck and breathing deeply.

"You smell so good," she murmured. I took her face between my hands and kissed her forehead, each cheek, her nose, and finally her mouth. Her lips clung to mine, over and over, until I rolled her on her back and braced myself above her. I ran my nose along the fragrant, soft skin under her jaw, squeezing my eyes shut in terror, loving her with every part of my being.

"I love you, Bella," I said unsteadily, and slashed my teeth across her jugular.

Hot. Delicious. Ecstasy. I moaned as I sucked the nectar from her body, my eyes rolling back and lids fluttering shut in primal joy as the exultation of my singer's blood rushed through me. The delectable essence washed down my throat, quenching the fire there, only to have it settle lower in my loins and shoot out, tingling, into my extremities. She arched hard against me, crying out and clenching her fists at her sides. I moaned again, lapping the wound closed, unable to fight against instinct as I raised her slender arm and slid underneath. I sank my teeth into the soft, yielding flesh under her limb, bursting the vein that held such glory, filling my mouth, my entire being. It was getting harder to follow the dictates of my mind and seal that cut – only the knowledge that the most blissful of treats lay ahead allowed me to wrench away.

There wasn't a wasted drop on my lips as I flashed down, spreading her thighs, throwing her leg over my shoulder. With a husky growl I bit deep into the throbbing vein running along her groin, pressing my face to her flesh as hard as I dared, letting the hypnotic flavor flow. The cries from her mouth and the writhe and arch of her body echoed those of her climax. I dimly realized I was as hard as I had ever been, throbbing and aching, my erection pulsing in time with each draw of my mouth, each push of my venom into her.

The rapture of her blood roared through me, soaring and lifting me beyond our bodies. I heard Jasper panting and gasping in an effort to control both of our emotions. "I – I'm sorry – I can't -" He bolted from the room, and the monster in me rejoiced.

A towering wave of satisfaction and lust roared towards me, coming closer, and still I pulled and sucked. My hands grasped her thigh, leaving small bruises in the soft flesh, and I shivered in delight as she filled me. I fought against it, I knew I had to…but the wave grew.

"Edward," I heard Carlisle's voice from a great distance. "Edward, enough." I dimly felt his hand on my back.

The wave erupted over me, obliterating me. I detonated, vaporized, my consciousness exploding into the most volatile fracture of white-hot light and rapture I'd ever experienced. I cried out, convulsing, quaking uncontrollably… and breaking the suction of my ravenous mouth.

I fell away from her, forcing myself to give one last swipe of my tongue to seal the gash, and fell twitching and shuddering onto the floor. I curled up into the fetal position, sobbing in harsh, dry heaves at the loss of the unbearable ecstasy, and in abject gratitude of the ability I had to let it go.

I felt Carlisle's arms come around me, and moments later Emmett's circled us both. We lay there, the three of us, together, on the floor. They gave comfort in the only way they could until I gathered myself, the balm of consciousness returning to me. Their embrace finally loosened as I rolled to my back, opening my eyes and blinking wearily. I heard Carlisle's shocked reaction to the unusual and amazingly vivid, glowing, swirling crimson of my irises. I saw them in his mind and recoiled myself.

"What…what…?" I managed hoarsely. My entire body ached.

"Holy shit," Emmett said succinctly, peering over Carlisle's shoulder at me. "That's just fucking creepy, man."

Carlisle tossed him a quelling look and crouched next to me, holding out a hand. I grasped it and struggled to rise, anxious to get back to Bella.

The screaming began.


	21. Chapter 20:Pretty Fly

**Stephenie Meyer owns everything Twilight, this fan fic of her story is mine, don't copy either, that just sucks.**

**Betas Sarahsumbrella and silentnc make the most awesome corrections, suggestions, and comments - lots of love, ladies, lots of love. I *ahem* added just a little bit to this chapter that they did not get a chance to review, so any glaring and embarrasing errors or awkwardness belong to me and only me.**

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**CHAPTER TWENTY: Pretty Fly**

It It had been the longest seventy hours of my existence. Her body had burned and twisted, she had screamed and thrashed. The first twenty hours had been the worst – I thought I would lose my mind witnessing what I had done to this lovely girl. Both Jasper and Emmett had urged me to leave, to go outside, to hunt, to run, but I couldn't. I had promised her I wouldn't leave, that I would stay by her side. I clung to her hand through the worst of her painful convulsions, talking to her constantly, hoping I was giving her something to hold on to despite the agony.

Carlisle had come and sat by my side for long stretches of time, offering his silent support and compassion. Esme had tried, but was so distressed by both of our suffering that she could only stay for very short periods, letting me know she loved us both and supporting me in her gentle, loving manner. Alice eventually began to give me updates as time crawled by, letting me know how much longer my heart had to suffer. She made a final appearance, wrapping her arms around my shoulders and pressing her lips to my ear. "She'll be with you any minute."

I shut my eyes in a flood of relief, my voice faltering in its incessant murmuring to her for the first time in over sixty-nine hours. I was lucky a vampire could not lose their voice; surely mine would have been gone long ago. I had never stopped whispering, murmuring, urging, pleading in her ear. I took heart in the vision Alice sent me, knowing Bella heard, knowing it had soothed her and smoothed her way back to me. Alice left silently, closing the basement door firmly behind her.

Bella did come back to me, only the rising crescendo of her heart signaling the momentous event. It crashed and beat and hammered, and then went silent. I held her hand, as I had been doing for the past three days, hovering anxiously. Her body had been thankfully still for the past few hours, long enough for us to change the shredded sheets on the bed and clothes on her body.

She opened her brilliant red eyes fully aware, blinking up into my face for long minutes before the most beautiful smile I had ever seen lifted her lips.

"Edward," she breathed in a musical, lilting voice, and I crushed her to me, lifting her from the bed and pressing her perfect form to me. "You didn't leave."

"Never," I whispered brokenly into her hair, squeezing my eyes shut in prayer, thanking the powers that had brought her back to me. I breathed in her scent – vanilla, cinnamon and flowers – and it was just so Bella. The persuasive fragrance was unchanged and yet so very different, burning me with still painful desire. I almost sighed in relief as I let the compulsion to take her wash over me, delightful in its familiarity and even more compelling because there was no conflict or worry for her life or safety. There was no confusion about what I wanted or concern that I would hurt her with my desire – I couldn't, not anymore, and I wanted her.

She pulled slightly away to gaze into my face in wonder. Her hands came up to trace along my jaw, my cheek, fluttering down my nose and across my lips. "Hi," she said, and I barked out a strained laugh.

"Hi yourself." She was smiling and examining me, and then a look of shock crossed her features. Her hand trembled against my mouth. "What?" I demanded.

"Oh my God," she whispered, and her hand slid around my neck to tangle in the hair at the nape of my neck. "Oh my God, I love you!"

She lunged at me, knocking me back off the bed and onto the floor with a resounding crash. She licked at my lips with a moan and slid her tongue past them. I welcomed it inside of me for the first time ever. We lay there, kissing and licking and rubbing and devouring each other's mouths until she finally pulled away the barest inch.

"How did you stand it?" she moaned, and dove back in for more. "Oh my God, you feel...you taste…so good!" She growled as she ripped at my shirt.

"Bella!" I laughed as I batted at her hands. She growled again, and I almost gave in right there. "Bella, wait. You need to feed. You need to eat. Bella!"

She sat up from where she was crouched over my hips. Her hand flew to her throat and the most shocked expression crossed her face. "Oh! I'm so thirsty!" Her eyes fell back on me spread beneath her and they turned greedy. "And hungry. Edward…!" she whined.

"Come on," I laughed, holding her waist and moving her gently off me. I stood and held my hand down to her. "First things first. There will be time – a lot of it – for that."

With a pout, she placed her hand in mine, and I pulled her to her feet. I brought her close up against my chest, wrapping my arm around her waist as I gazed down into her lovely face. "Are you really okay?" I asked softly, hardly daring to believe she was really here, with me, awake and aware, and that the ordeal was finally behind us.

The tension eased from her features as she cupped my cheeks in her hands. "Yes. I really am." Her eyes were warm and smiling on mine before they slowly slid down to focus on my mouth. "I just…_want_…so badly."

She lifted herself up on her tiptoes to press her lips against mine, gently at first, touching, tasting, brushing, before she whimpered deep in her throat and grabbed my ears, yanking my head down to hers.

"Yeowch!" I exclaimed, pulling back and reaching up to rub the offended appendages.

She dropped down to her feet and stumbled away from me, her hand pressed to her mouth and her eyes wide. "I'm so sorry!"

"It's okay," I grinned, rubbing her arm. "Remember, I told you that you'd be stronger than me for a while?"

"But not faster," she said, hesitantly returning my smile and taking my hand in hers.

"No, probably not," I agreed, staring into her face once again. She looked the same, but there were subtle differences to my eyes. Her skin had always been pale, but now it was opalescent in its beauty, shimmering and glowing. Her lips were slightly fuller, rosy and plump, the whiteness of her teeth behind them accentuated and gleaming. Her cheeks were round and soft, begging for my fingers to stroke them. Her flaring brows arched over brilliant crimson eyes. Those eyes, that marked her without question for what she now was, went hooded and dark as I continued to stare at her. She rose up again toward my mouth, and I reluctantly brought my hands up to brace against her shoulders.

"Bella," I groaned. "You have to eat."

She bit her lip, her face wistful, and nodded. "My throat burns," she admitted.

I couldn't stop my fingers from stroking her cheek. "Let's go."

I led her up the stairs, opening the basement door and turning to her as we walked out from under the stairs into the main part of the house.

"Where is everyone?" she asked curiously. She cocked her head, listening. "Upstairs?"

"Rose and Emmett are. They stayed close, just in case. Carlisle and Esme left with Jasper and Alice. I think they're hunting, as well."

We moved to the double doors in the front of the house, opening them to step out onto the porch. She came to an abrupt stop, jerking me to a halt with her as I still had a firm grip on her hand. "Oh…my." She took a deep breath of air, shutting her eyes and then opening them quickly to peer around us. "It smells…I can smell, and taste…everything!"

I smiled, placing a gentle, brief kiss to her mouth. "It may be a little overwhelming at first, but that's normal. You're doing so well."

"I feel normal," she said thoughtfully. "And yet…not. It's all so much."

"Come on. You'll feel better after you eat." I walked backward down the front steps. We moved slowly at first to the edge of the trees. "Do you want to run?" I asked her. "Try out some of your new abilities?"

She nodded eagerly, taking deep, full breaths.

"Okay." I stopped, bringing her around to face me. "But first, I've been dying to do this." I grabbed her up in a full-bodied, crushing hug, swinging her around with a delighted laugh. "You don't know how good that feels, not to have to worry about crushing you!"

"You don't know how good it feels," she returned, laughing with me. "Not to have to worry about you worrying about me!"

"I love you," I told her, setting her back down on her feet.

"I know. I love you, too."

"Let's go!" I grabbed her hand and darted off into the forest.

Her delighted exclamations echoed behind us as we ran at vampire speed, and she stretched her legs and sampled some of what her new body could do. She let go of my hand to dart around trees, dodging and hiding from me, delighting in her quickness and speed.

"You're not blurry to me anymore!" she laughed. "I can see you perfectly."

I grinned, and ran at my top speed away from her.

"Oh!" I heard her gasp. "My God, you are fast!"

I ran back, appearing before her. "Am I blurry now?"

She grabbed hold of my arms, effectively halting me. "You were, but I can hold you."

"Always," I told her.

She was mine – finally. My equal, my mate. I'd been riding the knife's edge of desire for too long, and her chaotic and uncontrollable newborn instincts were running high. We ran for a while more, our playfulness fading into the intensity of the hunt. We didn't last much longer than it took for her to feed that first time. She was covered in blood – neatness in her eating habits wouldn't come until later – her hair in a wild tangle, her clothes ripped and torn, smudges of dirt on her perfect white skin. She was glorious. She had just finished draining a small mountain lion and was high on the hunt. Her head lifted from the animal to meet my gaze, and she stalked me.

"Edward," she said in a tone that brooked no argument. "I want you."

I opened my arms. "I'm yours."

She flew at me, leaping when she was still a distance away and colliding with my chest. Her legs wrapped securely around my waist, her arms around my neck, and I held her close as her mouth came down on mine. She was warm, wet, and impatient as she nipped at my lower lip, her tongue grazing past the line of my teeth before slicking heavily along mine. Her legs tightened, and we both moaned as our tongues explored and taunted. I let my animal nature take over, feeling a flood of relief almost like sexual release as I grabbed the soft fabric of her pants and ripped them from her limbs. She was my mate, and I went mad, because I had to, and because I could.

I fell to the ground, first to my knees, and then leaning forward, forcing her onto her back. Her hands wrestled with my shirt, pulling it over my head and flinging it away. Her hands fluttered over my chest, touching, caressing, digging in and scratching down my abdomen to tangle in the hair that trailed from my navel across the small expanse of my belly. I grunted, convulsing with the sensation, curling over her, and her other hand held my face fast to hers. We didn't have to breathe, all we had to do was feel, and I couldn't get enough of her taste, the sensation of her tongue in my mouth, the relief of plunging mine into hers, over and over, deep and heavy, staking and claiming.

"Edward," she panted, growled, demanded, and pleaded, over and over. "Edward. Edward!"

Her shirt shredded under my hands and I filled them with her breasts. It was the only thing that could tear me from her mouth, and I was there instantly, biting and sucking desperately at the full, erect flesh. She gave a strangled scream, arching up hard and perfect underneath me, her hands clutching at my hair. Her body was a bow, quivering and pushing her breasts hard against my ravenous mouth in demand and supplication.

I rose up on my knees quickly, staring hard at her naked and writhing body spread before me. It was the most shocking and glorious thing I had ever seen. Her hands rose to cover her breasts, rubbing and pressing – whether to ease the ache from my mouth or increase it, I couldn't tell. She whimpered deep in her throat, twisting against me, toward me, and her eyes blinked open to stare into mine.

"Edward!" she demanded, and I plunged my fingers into her. She let out a tortured noise, grabbing my wrist and pulling my hand harder into her. I twisted them in and out of her before I needed both hands to get rid of my pants, and then we were both bare.

Her eyes opened again to stare at me, and I leaned over her, bringing my mouth down to hers. Hovering a breath away, I stared into her eyes and murmured "hang on" before plunging into her body.

There were no words, no expressions, to describe how it felt. I was in her, surrounded with her, a part of her. A raw shout scraped out of my throat, and I suddenly, inconceivably realized I could feel me in her. My head whirled with the strange, electrifying, dual sensation. I could feel me in her – feel _me_ in her. I was penetrating, but I was also penetrated, and the sensation was so unbelievable, so strong, so intense, that I came instantly. I opened my eyes in shock to stare at her beloved face beneath me before blinking them back shut. I realized I could see my face, feel my weight; I was infiltrated with love so pure and deep, familiar and the same, _but not my own_.

"Bella!" I croaked, my entire being reeling with shock and disbelief.

Her eyes flew open, and a look of pure amazement crossed her features before they darkened with fury and denial. "Edward!" her hands grabbed at my shoulder before she pounded her fists against my chest. "What? No! You can't…you can't just _stop_!"

"Bella." My voice was no better. I tried to clear my throat. "Bella, I can hear you."

"Good!" she shouted, and then whimpered, undulating under me, pressing her pelvis desperately to mine, rubbing her breasts against my chest. "Do something! Move! Keep going." She bucked up, hard.

"No," I said, not in denial but in confusion. I was dazed. My hand touched her cheek in wonder, my eyes roving her tense features before my eyes closed, and I heard her frustration, her desperation, her love.

"Yes, damn it!" she growled, opening her eyes and meeting my gaze with a furious and disbelieving glare. "You can't just leave me like this!"

"Bella, I can hear you. I can…hear your mind."

Her eyes did not waver from mine as she went still. The desperate tension in her body slowly faded, and she finally whispered, "What? How?"

"I – I don't know." I shut my eyes and pressed my forehead to hers. I could hear – I could feel – her confusion, her surprise, the swirling thoughts in her head. I could hear her love. I could hear how much she wanted me, physically, emotionally, with every fiber of her being. I could hear my Bella, and it was more than I ever imagined.

Her fingers touched my face, and I blinked my eyes open to stare into hers. "You can really hear me?" she asked hesitantly.

I nodded, too overwhelmed to speak.

A small smile of bliss and happiness flitted across her features. "Then you know," she whispered simply.

I nodded again, unable to do anything else.

"Good." She leaned her head up to kiss me, her lips pressing against mine, and I was surrounded by her devotion.

She gasped and her head fell back over my arm as I began moving inside of her again, helpless against the pull of my instinct, the driving lash of emotions inside of me. Her hands clutched at my back and she was instantly with me again in the maelstrom of our desire and lust. I wasn't gentle, I couldn't be, but I knew – I _knew_ – it was all right. I took her hard, plunging mindlessly into her, driving my body into hers to make us one being, united in one goal. She met me thought for thought, thrust for thrust, our hands scrabbling and grasping along hard, invincible flesh. Our mouths bit and tore, teeth nipping and biting and bearing down until we exploded and fractured together. I was surrounded by both of our orgasms, the awareness lifting me beyond the edges of reality and shattering me against the anchor of her beloved body.

We lay there – I had no idea how long – until we came back to ourselves. I was draped over her much smaller form, completely covering her, pressing her into the soft loam of the forest floor. I opened my eyes, and her finger twitched.

"Again," she whispered, and a startled, disbelieving laugh rasped out of my chest.

She giggled lazily, and I managed to tip my head down to see her face, serene and smooth and glowing in the dim light. She rolled her eyes up to meet mine and smiled. "Maybe in a few minutes."

"Mmm," I hummed, smiling, and rolled slightly to one side, falling off of her but keeping my arm firmly across her bare stomach.

My eyes shot open and I tensed in surprise. The connection, our connection, was broken. I was no longer surrounded by the balm of her happiness and satisfaction.

"What?" she asked, turning her head and arching a brow as she sensed my tension.

"I can't hear you. It's gone."

We both stared at each other in consternation for a few seconds, and then both of our gazes slowly traveled down the length of our naked bodies to where my cock had softened – no longer inside of her – against her hip.

"Do you...do you suppose…?" she whispered as we both still stared.

"I don't know."

She bit her lip, still looking down at me, and her head slowly came up to meet my gaze. A mischievous glint lit her eye. "Only one way to find out, huh?" she asked, her smile widening.

I returned it, leering, and raised up on one elbow to loom over her naked body. "Oh, the things I do in the name of science."

I was hard yet again, and slid into her with no resistance. Her mind, her glorious, amazing, and complicated mind, flashed into mine and surrounded me once again. I gasped, helplessly shouting into her hair. I was inside her body, inside her head, and it was more than I ever believed I could have. It was everything.

We spent the afternoon in the depths of the forest, talking, making love, both of us reveling in our physical ability to just be together without conflict, without anguish. It was a unique and quite unbelievable sensation. To feel so much, so strongly, with no guilt…to have this girl with me, wanting to be with me…it was simply the best day of my entire existence. I could no longer doubt the rightness of what I'd done. Perhaps rightness wasn't quite the right word – I still didn't know how _right_ it was – but I could not mistake the true joy and contentment she felt here with me. How much she truly did love me – it quite matched my own feelings. I couldn't doubt it, not any longer, not with her thoughts and feelings flowing and twining through mine when I was inside her.

"I don't ever want to leave your body," I breathed, kissing her, braced on my elbows over her. Our legs were intertwined, my hips pressed firmly into hers, still deeply ensconced where I had been for hours, profoundly inside her.

"I don't ever want you to," she whispered against my lips "I never imagined…how good you'd feel. And I imagined it quite a lot."

"Did you?" My voice was a silken murmur as I brushed my lips along the smooth line of her jaw and down her neck where I bit sharply. A few dim and hazy fantasies involving the both of us flitted through her mind, and into mine. My cock flexed at the images, and her body twitched in a jolt of involuntary pleasure as she moaned at the sensation.

"Jesus, Edward," she gasped. "Again?"

"Always," I assured her, but raised my head to meet her eyes. I could lay on top of her forever, she would never feel the discomfort of my weight, but unfortunately, reality intruded. "We should be getting back. They'll be worried." I resisted the combined pull of our sexual need and managed to lift my body off hers, breaking our intimate physical and mental connection.

She groaned in protest, and I echoed the sentiment, but rose to my feet. I offered my hand down to her with a regretful smile, and she sat on the ground, staring up at me and biting her lip.

"Thank you, Edward," she said clearly, finally slipping her small hand in to my larger one and rising before me.

"For?" I questioned, surreptitiously checking her body for any signs of our vigorous activities out of habit.

She took both of my hands in hers and squeezed gently, gaining my full attention. "For having the courage to face your fears, your doubts, and changing me. For listening to me, and what I want. For loving me."

I swallowed venom around the lump in my throat, unable to speak, managing only to give her a jerking nod in acknowledgement. She smiled slightly, reading my face, leaning up on her toes to press a chaste kiss to my mouth. It said more than all of the carnal and erotic things we had done to each other that day.

"I do love you, Edward Cullen."

"And I you, Bella Cullen."

She grinned, a full, happy grin this time, and her eyes roved down my tall, naked form. She cast her eyes around on the ground, looking for our clothes, I supposed, frowning when she spotted the remnants flung around the forest floor and hanging from tree limbs.

"How can we go back like this?" she asked, wiggling her fingers at my nudity.

I shrugged, walking quickly over to where my shirt lay, picking it up and examining what was left. It appeared mostly intact, missing all but two buttons. One sleeve was torn at the shoulder seam, but holding on – barely. "This is the best of the bunch," I said, holding it out to her.

I helped her shrug into it, holding it open for her to slip her arms through the sleeves. "What are you going to wear?" she asked.

I slid the two buttons through their respective holes, rolling the long sleeves up to her elbows before I took a step back to examine her. The garment covered her almost to her knees; it would do to preserve what was left of her modesty. I knew my family had returned to the house. I shrugged at her question.

"Nothing to do, I suppose, but make a run for it when we get back." I laughed at her incredulous expression.

"I can go in and get you some clothes," she said. "I'm covered – for the most part." She peered down at her bare legs dubiously.

"No," I said quickly, and her gaze shot back to my face. "I don't want anybody…giving you a hard time. You don't need to face them all by yourself, this first time especially, looking like…well, like that."

She rolled her eyes and took my hand, leading me unerringly back the way we came. "And I don't think they need to see you looking like…well, like that," she imitated me with a meaningful nod toward my bare groin. "If you'll pardon me for saying so," she added dryly.

I grinned as we ran swiftly back to the house, making the distance in short time. "You'll just have to protect me," I teased, pulling her to me, covering my front as we stopped at the line of trees circling the house.

"I don't think I'll need to," she commented, pointing toward a heap of something laying on the edge of the clearing.

I lifted my attention from where I had been nibbling her shoulder, and saw a pile of clothes folded neatly on the ground. "Alice," I laughed, giving her smooth skin one last caress before letting her go and pulling on the garments.

She helped me with the fastening of the pants and then the buttons of the shirt, her eyes on her hands. I could see the faint frown wrinkling her forehead.

"What's the matter, love?" I asked, straightening my collar, and she took a step back.

"You said something. Before," she said slowly.

"Before?" I had said lots of things in the past few hours. "Before what?"

"Before we went hunting."

"What did I say?" I frowned, trying to remember if I had said anything that could have upset her. I couldn't remember clearly, I had been enveloped in such a haze of relief and thankfulness she was well and whole and Bella after she had come back to herself after the change.

"You said…that Emmett and Rosalie stayed at the house 'just in case'. In case of what?" Her hand reached out to trail down the line of buttons on my shirt.

Oh." I frowned thoughtfully. "No one knew how you'd react when you…woke. That's why Emmett and Rose stayed," I explained to her. "They wanted to be there in case I needed some, well, help. Some newborns are violent, scared and shocked when they first become aware, but not you. Carlisle and Jasper wanted to stay, as well, but I knew you would be fine. So did Alice."

She contemplated this in silence. "Violent?"

"Well, yes. The intensity of your senses, the changes in your body, your awareness, it can be quite overwhelming at first. Some newborns take a little while before they settle down and can handle themselves around others."

"So why wasn't I? Out of control, I mean."

"You don't call this out of control?" I teased, gesturing at my ruined shirt. She smiled but narrowed her eyes meaningfully at me.

I sighed, stepping in close to her and curving my hand around her neck, pulling her in to press a kiss to her forehead. "I'm not entirely certain," I admitted. "You came out of the actual transition, the physical change, much more aware than anyone I've ever heard of before. I think it's due partly to your specific background, your prior knowledge of what was going to happen, and acceptance of it all, and maybe due to the fact I never left you. I never stopped talking to you." I had anchored her to me, to the world around her, through her ordeal. I had described what she was going through, the changes affecting her body, what I was doing, what my family was doing, what I was thinking, every detail, every second.

She was quiet for long minutes, considering this. "I heard you," she said softly. "In those brief – very brief – lucid moments during the…pain, I heard you. I reached out for you in my mind, concentrated on your voice, your words, even though I was…wasn't able to make sense of them." She met my gaze and her fingers traced over my brows, down along my cheekbones. "I felt you there, Edward, even though I was out of my mind. I felt your presence. I could concentrate on you, and it got me through the worst of the…hurting."

"Then I'm glad," I whispered, shutting my eyes and absorbing the feel of her fingertips on my face. It helped lessen my own anguish at the torture she had gone through, to feel her touch and know she was well and whole, and indestructible now, before me.

I took her hand and we moved across the clearing to the house. I paused on the wide, sprawling back deck as I heard my family – our family – moving around inside, and heard the hum of their thoughts. "Do you want me to go get you some, um, pants or something?" I gestured vaguely at her bare legs

She opened her mouth to answer, but suddenly whirled, crouching slightly in front of me as a figure appeared in the door to our side. A low warning growl slipped from her throat. I stared at her in surprise and then at Alice.

Bella straightened almost instantly, a look of shock and embarrassment on her face. "It's okay," I soothed, shooting my sister a confused look as I rubbed Bella's arms. "You're going to be a bit on edge for a while. Your newborn instincts and emotions are going to be a little unpredictable until you get used to them."

"I'm so sorry, Alice," Bella apologized miserably. "What did you say?"

Alice paused to take Jasper's hand as he slid silently into place beside her. I could read his concern for his wife's safety, but it faded when he saw the situation was well in hand.

"I didn't say anything," Alice said with a smile. "And don't worry about it. I should have known better. I should have said something or made a noise first. I was just bringing you this." She held out another bundle of material.

Bella took it from her and shook it out, revealing a loose skirt with an elastic waist. She murmured her thanks and slipped it on. It occurred to me she was bare under the shirt, and now the skirt. Jasper coughed into his hand as a wave of lust washed over me.

"Come on," Alice said, reaching out and taking Bella's arm, pulling her into the house. "Edward, keep it in your pants for a little bit. Everyone's excited to see Bella."

"Yeah, so is Edward," Jasper joked under his breath with a smirk, falling in next to me as we trailed after our wives. "Excited, that is."

"Shut up," I grumbled, but grinned as I punched his shoulder. He rubbed the spot absently as he took his own swing at me.

"Hey, what's this?" Emmett asked, appearing next to us out of nowhere. "You two aren't wrestling without me, are you?" He grabbed and tucked each of us under one of his arms, no mean feat as both Jasper and I were well over six feet tall. He walked into the main room with us struggling, cursing, and swearing, trying to get loose.

There was a low, rumbling growl, and I looked up to see Bella standing in the middle of the room, struggling slightly with Esme as she glared at us.

"Put me down," I hissed, struggling in earnest. "Now! Emmett!"

My alarm must have gotten through to him, because he dropped me on the floor and stepped back with a frown. I jumped up and was at Bella's side in an instant. "I'm okay, Bella," I assured her, wrapping my arms around her and holding her to me. "Emmett was just joking around."

She was trembling slightly, and I pulled back to look into her heart-shaped face, my hands brushing the hair back behind her ears.

"I'm sorry," she said, her eyes wide and wounded. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I just…I can't…I don't like the thought of anyone hurting you. It makes me…" she shuddered in my arms.

"It's okay, you're a newborn. She's a newborn," I said more loudly, to the room. Rosalie had appeared beside Emmett and was glaring at Bella warningly. "You're going to struggle with this. It's okay, you're doing much better than anyone else I've ever seen. It's okay, Bella, really."

After a few seconds she nodded, pressing her face to my chest, and taking a deep breath. She lifted her head to look around me. "I'm sorry, Alice, Emmett," she apologized yet again.

"Of course," Alice said with a smile.

"It's okay, Bella." Emmett placed his arm on Rose's shoulder, and she turned her glare to him.

Bella stepped a half step away from me, rubbing at her forehead. "Are you okay?" I asked in concern, bending my knees to peer worriedly into her face. Did vampires even get headaches, I wondered?

She smiled reassuringly at me. "I'm okay, just embarrassed." Her smile faded into a frown. "I keep thinking that I'm hearing…feeling…" she shrugged helplessly, uncomfortably.

I mirrored her frown and heard Carlisle move up behind me. He gave me a calm look before turning his attention to Bella. "You are doing well, Bella. You should have seen Edward after he woke from the change. He was so upset, so confused. The voices in his head didn't help matters any, that's for sure." Bella rewarded him with a hesitant but honest smile. "And Esme, she was so uncertain, scared even, but so hungry." He gave his wife a smile full of remembrance and love. "Rosalie, well, Rosalie was just mad." There was a snort from Rose and an amused "Babe!" from Emmett. "Emmett was…Emmett was…happy. A little over-exuberant, though." This brought a private smile from my father at the memories; I couldn't suppress a grin of my own despite the concern for my wife. "So you see, we all had our issues. None of us certainly handled it as well as you are." I noticed he kindly lumped himself in with the rest of us.

Bella searched his face, but no one could doubt my father. She gave another smile and nodded, and he hugged her tight. "None of us will ever fault you for feeling protective of your mate," he murmured into her ear.

He released her, and she stepped into my arms for reassurance. I gave it to her, holding her close and brushing her lips with mine. I'd meant it as a quick, soothing caress, but her tongue came out to swipe at my lower lip, and I caught my breath. The next thing I knew, my tongue was plunging deep into her mouth, ravaging and taking, my hands clutching her skirt into bunches as I started to drag it up her thighs.

"Edward!" Emmett's laughing voice broke through the haze of lust that enveloped me. His hand clapped down on my shoulder, and I pulled away from Bella's warm, wet mouth with a gasp. "Jeez, and you give me and Rosie a hard time!"

I grinned sheepishly into Bella's stunned face, the amusement of my family ringing around us. Her bemusement faded into humor, too, and soon we were all laughing together.


	22. Chapter 21: Take A Lesson

**SMeyer owns it all, I just came up with these words. Don't steal.**

**Betas silentnc and Sarahsumbrella - I look forward to getting the chapters back from them to see the comments and suggestions, it helps so much. Thanks for catching my errors!**

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**CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE: Take A Lesson**

Bella was _happy_ to be a vampire, and ecstatic to be with me. Everything about her practically screamed contentment, even when the thirst burned and clawed at her throat. She trusted me and my family to teach her to hunt animals and keep her away from humans until the time came that she had sufficient control to be among them safely.

Carlisle's theory – and I agreed with him – on why she took with such unusual ease to her new existence was, quite simply, information. She had known about vampires, our habits, characteristics, and society, for a couple of years, thanks to Phil. The vampire's ability had led him to make sure Bella was well informed of our world and the existence of "magical" beings before we had even met. Due to his assistance – or interference – when we did finally meet, it was not a shock to her as it certainly would have been. I debated about telling her of Phil's unique ability, and the extent of his involvement with our meeting each other. I didn't want her to think that his relationship with her mother had been a ruse to bring us together. I had promised her honesty, though, and I didn't want to keep such information from her.

"No," she said thoughtfully, when I did finally explain to her Phil's involvement. "I know he truly cared for her. You could see it in the way he looked at her, the way he was around her."

"Of that I have no doubt," I murmured in her ear, wrapping my arms around her to hold her tight. "He has to be a very compassionate being, not only having dedicated himself to vegetarianism, but in being able to deal with his ability, century after century."

Phil's telling her of vampires, mythical creatures, and of our ways and society had served a dual purpose. He had prepared her for me; he had smoothed the way for her acceptance of me, of my world. He'd also made sure, by not keeping our existence a secret from her, that the Volturi would send me after her – that we'd have to have contact, to meet. Did he know she was my singer? Had he known he'd be risking her life, that there was a very real possibility I would drink from her, kill her, instead of changing her? Of this, I had no idea. I wanted to meet this Phillip, learn more about how his complicated and fascinating ability worked. I hoped I would have the opportunity one day.

He had also given Bella the opportunity to discuss and process the possibility of a vampire changing a human.

"Of course, Renee and I talked about it," she told me. "Renee was dying, and Phil was a vampire. We all knew it was a possibility. We spent a lot of time thinking about it, discussing it. In the end, it was her choice, hers and Phil's. She just decided it wasn't the right thing for her. She didn't want it."

My gut had clenched at her words.

"That was her choice, Edward, not mine. Those were completely different circumstances than ours." She kissed my lips softly. "This is my choice. You are my choice. I chose you."

She had willingly made that decision to be with me, to be like me, knowing what it meant, knowing the un-romanticized version of our existence. I had to keep reminding myself it truly was what she wanted. Bella's circumstances had been much different than any of the rest of us. She had the chance to make a fully informed decision to be changed beforehand, and I had to believe it made a difference. I had made my choice as well. I had chosen to keep her with me, abide by her decision, and trust that she would not come to regret it. And I did trust her, although in the beginning it was difficult.

"I can't ever see myself regretting this," she told me. "Regret being with you, being with you on equal terms. I'll never get tired of what you can share with me. All of you."

All I could do was let her know how very much I felt the same.

We talked, endlessly. We made love, tirelessly. The last of my reservations about changing her disappeared with finality when I saw her enjoyment of her new life, her smile and enthusiasm where there had been worry and despair. She brought such light to my existence, as well. I'd never realized how bleak and grey everything had seemed before she came to me. I knew such joy existed, I'd seen it and heard it in the minds of others, but I never fully realized what an impact it had on every aspect of my being. Just to know that there was someone else there, all the time, without question and without reservation…Someone I could turn to with whatever was on my mind and in my heart. The relief, the excitement, and the pleasure was exhilarating.

The only small hitch in those first few months was Rosalie. She was never rude to Bella, never mean or out of line in any way, but she certainly made it clear that my wife was not someone with whom she cared to spend time. At first I thought she held some sort of small grudge against Bella for taking some of the focus away from her, for being the center of attention as we all did our best to help with her transition. Bella and Alice had become close and fast friends, and she spent quite a lot of time with Esme. They truly enjoyed each other's company. I gave some consideration to the fact that perhaps Rosalie was still upset about Bella wanting to go after Emmett that first evening after her change, when he had been roughhousing with me. I just couldn't imagine it was something so small and petty that would cause the continuing cold shoulder treatment, so I finally relented and intruded on her thoughts.

I waited until we were alone, doing some tuning to the Aston Martin. Bella and I had been out joyriding, and Rose wanted to check the vehicle after our exuberant driving. I was considering getting Bella a fun, fast toy of her own, perhaps a Ferrari, when I idly picked up my beautiful sister's thoughts.

All thoughts of sports cars flew out of my mind when I realized what the problem truly was.

"Really?" I snorted, staring at Rose.

She rolled the crawler out from under the Aston, scowling at me. "Is nothing sacred to you?" she snapped irritably. "Can't you let a person have their own private thoughts without having to listen in all the time?"

"Of course," I said, staring her down. "But I wanted to know why you were being so cool to Bella. There's no reason for it, Rosalie, especially not that reason. She's been nothing but kind to you."

Rosalie couldn't maintain my direct gaze and slid back underneath the car. I wouldn't let her get away with it that easily.

"You can't blame her for her choice," I insisted, putting my fingers around her ankle. "It's her particular situation, her set of choices and decisions, Rose, not you. Not yours."

She kicked my hand away and once again rolled out from under the car to glare at me. "I know that, Edward," she said scathingly. "I can't help how I feel. If only I'd had the choice…I just think she let her libido rule her head."

"You don't know anything about it, about her. About us." I was starting to get irritated at her high-handedness. "You have no right to judge, none at all."

She shrugged. "It's not like you don't feel the same. Can you really tell me that you wouldn't have made the choice to stay human if you'd had the chance?"

I tried to calm my ire. I knew Rosalie had no idea what we'd been through. She had never had the circumstance or had the opportunity to think about this the way Bella and I had. I couldn't deny I had felt the way she did – hadn't I harbored resentment toward Carlisle for too long? Rose had never had the chance to consider the situation the way I had.

"Rose," I sighed. "Think about it – really think. If you were in any condition when Carlisle found you to be presented with the facts, to have had the time to consider the choice, would you really have made a different one? You were dying – that wasn't Carlisle's fault. He never would have done it otherwise. Would you really have chosen to die, if that was your only other option? Die, or become a vampire and have the opportunity to continue to exist in this world?"

She frowned. "But -"

"I know you never would have chosen to give up your human life to become a vampire," I said gently. "But that choice was taken from you, and from Carlisle, before he found you. If you knew your only two options were to die or to become a vampire – the _only_ two choices – can you tell me honestly you wouldn't have chosen this?"

She was silent for a long time. I continued to study her face, willing her to understand. I was glad I had had the opportunity to make this discovery for myself, and let my bitterness go. Finally, she met my gaze with a soft smile.

"Looks like you've had a chance to think things through yourself," she said. "I see what you're saying, Edward, and…yes. Yes, I probably would have made that choice, had I been able to, and known those were my only options." She paused, still staring at me. "You, too?"

"Yes," I admitted softly. "To die in that hospital in Chicago, of the influenza, or continue on and eventually meet Bella…Yes. I would have made that choice. I understand how Carlisle made that choice. How Bella could make that choice – how I could make the decision to change her."

She nodded jerkily, but still watched me curiously. "Would they really have killed her, Edward? The Volturi?"

I sighed, rubbing the bridge of my nose. I knew most of us in the mythical world believed the Volturi to be all-knowing and righteous, the benevolent ruling force in our world, keeping peace and order. While that was mostly true, I knew from my extensive involvement with them that they had many of the same failings we all did.

"Yeah," I sighed, and she jerked in surprise. "They would have killed her, or changed her against her will and kept her to work for them. I can't say they still won't try."

"Well." She gave me a gentle, knowing smile that lit her beautiful face, and I knew we were on our way to a better understanding between the three of us. "They can try, right?"

"Thank you, Rosalie." I put my hand on her knee and gave it a brief pat. Her smile turned into a wide grin, and she dismissed me by going back under the car.

I rose and went into the house, only to find Bella waiting in the back hall, close to the door. I raised a brow at her.

"Were you eavesdropping?" I murmured, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her to me.

"Yes." She kissed me and leaned back. "I didn't know you felt that way, Edward, but I'm glad I know now. I'm glad you understand."

"It's like you were born to be a vampire with me," I told her. "And I'll be thankful for that miracle every day I am on this earth."

She simply shook her head at me with a wise, knowing smile, her eyes sparkling, and placed her palm against my cheek. "Soul mates, remember? It sounds horribly trite, but I was born to be with you."

"We were born to be with each other," I corrected, and kissed her. "And whatever circumstances brought us together, I can only be grateful for the rest of eternity."

A large part of those circumstances was the Volturi. They had brought Bella and me together, but they also had the power to tear us – all of us – apart. It was something that could be ignored only for a short while; I knew they would not let this go. It was only a matter of time before they sent someone after us. The question was would it be simply to check that Bella had been changed, or to teach us a lesson for thwarting them? At this point, I couldn't tell, and Alice had no visions of them sending someone to Washington in the immediate future. I was certain, though, that it would not be the case for long.

I was concerned about Bella's talent as a shield and the attraction it held for the Volturi. Would her ability be one that Aro would continue to covet? It was powerful and tempting enough on its own, but combined with my mind reading capabilities, Alice's precognition, and Jasper's ability to read and manipulate emotions…I didn't think it was a situation the Volturi would overlook. The concentration of talent and the unusual size of our family would certainly keep us in the forefront of the Volturi's collective consciousness, and I knew from experience that was never a good thing.

The eight of us sat together and discussed the situation. Our special talents, combined with Emmett's strength, Carlisle's knowledge and leadership, Esme's capacity to love and pull us all together, as well as Rosalie's tenaciousness and mechanical ability, did make us an enormous potential threat to the Volturi.

"But we aren't!" Bella protested.

"We know that," Carlisle pointed out, "but they don't. They are so used to power, and wielding it, it doesn't occur to them others might not want it as well."

Jasper had been silent, as was his way, standing behind Alice as we talked. A thoughtful frown crossed his features, and I started in surprise at his thought.

"Do you think it would work that way?" I asked, and the conversation that had been flying around the table stopped abruptly.

"I don't know," he replied slowly. "But it might."

"How do we find out?" I asked, intrigued.

"What?" Bella asked, gripping my hand.

"Perhaps," I murmured in response to Jasper, staring at him thoughtfully.

"I hate it when he does that," Emmett muttered. "What?"

I nodded at Jasper, and he spoke up. "Well, I was thinking…Bella's shield ability protects her from any extra-sensory abilities of vampires and other creatures, as far as we can tell." This was true. She thwarted Jasper's ability, as well as Alice's and mine – except when I was inside her. And we wouldn't be telling anyone about that – or testing it to see if it was the case with anyone else – _ever_.

"And…so?" Emmett barked in frustration when he didn't continue. He gave Bella an apologetic shrug.

"So I was thinking, what if she could somehow project that shield? Extend it to those around her. Provide others with her protection," Jasper said.

"How would I know if I could do that?" Bella asked eagerly. She shrank back against me slightly when everyone turned their speculative gazes on her. At her question, the attention all turned to Carlisle.

His brow was furrowed in thought. "I think we should make a call up to Denali," he finally said. "Tanya, Irina, and Kate have been around for a very long time, and may have heard of something like this. Or Eleazar – he was with the Volturi for a very long time himself, and he has the gift of sensing beings' special abilities. He should be able to help."

Carlisle contacted the Denali clan, our extended family up in the Alaskan wilderness. They all expressed their delight in being invited to come visit us in Washington – not only to help with the issue of Bella's ability, but also to meet her, my wife. Bella was curious as well, having heard of the group from Phil. She wanted to meet the vampires he had spoken of so fondly

Tanya, Kate, and Irina were sisters in the same manner that Emmett, Jasper, Alice, Rosalie, and I – and now Bella – were siblings. They were over one thousand years old and the original succubi of legend. They had a true love and enjoyment of males, of sex, of interaction and relations with both humans and vampires of the opposite sex. They were also the original vegetarians of the vampire world, having sought out that lifestyle in order to maintain their interactions and intimate relationships with humans. Carlisle had sought them out to learn more of their lifestyle after accidentally stumbling on the fact that a vampire could survive on animal blood, and they all had been close ever since.

Other than the sisters' compelling sexual attraction and draw, Kate also had a unique ability to be able to give a shock with her touch. Kate's talent would be particularly useful for training, teaching, and experimenting with Bella's ability to project her shield. Kate's shock ranged from a mild tingle to a knock-a-vampire-flat-on-its-ass jolt. If Bella could block her, it would test the extent of her shielding ability. It was also a perfect opportunity to see if she could project her shield around others and offer them the same protection.

Eleazar and Carmen also made the trip with the sisters from the Denali wilderness to Hoquiam. Carmen was Eleazar's mate, and Eleazar's talent allowed him to see the abilities of supernatural creatures, He could sense if there was an extra gift at all, what it was, and the extent of that ability. We were all curious to see if he could sense Bella's and give us information on his experiences with similar circumstances.

Bella and Alice were seated at the computer in the main room of the house, looking over various properties we owned, trying to find the perfect location for a short honeymoon. We wanted to get away, just the two of us, now that we knew how well Bella was taking to her new life. I wanted her to myself for a while now that we were free to indulge completely in each other, and we both wanted to remove the threat of our presence from our family until we had a better understanding of what the Volturi might be planning.

"Well, at least this time you'll have Bella to protect your virtue," Emmett teased me as we waited for our guests. I shot him a quelling look, and Bella glanced up from the computer.

"Your virtue?" she asked with a raised brow, and then frowned at Emmett. "What about his virtue?"

Emmett smirked at me while I gave him a look that promised retribution. "Nothing, love. Emmett's just being an ass, as usual."

Emmett backed down, still grinning, but Rosalie piped up – damn the two of them. She would have to pick right now to try to be more friendly to Bella – if that was in fact was she was trying to do. I had my doubts. "You mean Edward didn't tell you about the Denali sisters?" She shook her head in mock disbelief. "The originators of the succubus myth?" She lifted her head from the magazine open in her lap, and pretended to examine me. "Well, he used to be the only single male vampire in our circle, and he is kind of pretty, although a bit skinny for my taste…" she shrugged, and with a small, evil grin turned the page. "But I guess I can see how they'd be all over him, all the time." I could hear her smug satisfaction, and Emmett's amusement, and I wanted to smack her.

Bella turned to me with a look. I could tell she knew what they were doing, but couldn't help but let it get to her. "All over you?" she asked in a dangerous, low voice. Those two should know better than to provoke a newborn, especially since Bella had already shown some overprotective tendencies where I was concerned.

Alice tried to come to my rescue. She gave a small laugh. "It's nothing, Bella. It's just how they are. They can't help it, they just love men, especially pretty men, and Edward certainly is that, isn't he?"

"Alice…" I grumbled. By the heat growing in Bella's red eyes, I could tell this wasn't helping.

"All over you?" Bella repeated, moving a few steps toward me and glaring. "And they're coming _here_?"

I closed the distance between us and took her upper arms in my hands, rubbing soothingly. "It really is nothing, Bella. It's like a reflex action with them – any man in the vicinity. I've never been interested in any of them, and they've never pushed it."

Emmett gave a snort at this, and I couldn't help the involuntary cringe at that whopper. Bella's eyes narrowed. "Really." Her voice dripped ice.

"Didn't Phil tell you about them? About their, ah, abilities?" I asked with a charming, crooked smile.

Her eyes narrowed further. "No. He neglected to mention that they were sex fiends."

"Gorgeous sex fiends," Emmett supplied cheerfully, and I was glad when Rosalie gave him a hard pinch.

"Gorgeous sex fiends," Bella repeated. "They do know you're married now, right? Mated? Irrevocably?"

"Yes, that's one of the reasons they wanted to come, to meet my wife." I realized my mistake the second the words left my mouth, and her features hardened.

"To check me out," Bella stated flatly. "To see how I measure up – if I'm worthy."

"No, that's not it at all," I assured her, placing a quick kiss to her unresponsive lips. "They want to meet the woman who finally melted the heart of the impervious Edward Cullen. They were all starting to think there was something wrong with me. I knew I was just waiting for you," I charmed shamelessly.

It worked. Her mouth quirked in amusement, and Emmett made gagging noises behind me. "Just as long as they know you're mine," she said with a small smile.

"Like they won't notice for themselves, with him attached to your face all the time," Emmett commented as I attached myself to her face.

"You're the only one who has ever touched my heart," I murmured after kissing her thoroughly. "The only one I've ever wanted."

"Good." She pulled me down for another possessive, deep kiss and palmed me over my jeans. I jumped and then moaned, and Alice, Emmett, and Rosalie groaned.

"Good God, find them someplace to honeymoon, quick," Rosalie told Alice. Emmett just picked Rose up, threw her over his shoulder, and ran laughing up the stairs.

The Denali clan arrived a couple of days later, in a whirl of noise, chatter, and color. Bella stood stoically at my side in the great room as we greeted our guests, our extended family. Tanya approached us first as the others greeted Carlisle and Esme. She glided up, beaming, giving Bella a charming smile as she leaned up and kissed me, placing both cool palms on my cheeks.

"Edward, darling," she purred in her exotic, slightly accented voice. "It's wonderful to see you home again after all these years. And I'm so excited to meet your Bella!"

There was a slightly awkward moment, and I lifted my hands to return her greeting, but Bella refused to loosen her fingers around mine. Our clasped hands hovered between Tanya and me, and she hid a knowing smile.

"Ah, yes. Tanya, this is my wife, Bella. Bella, Tanya."

"It's a pleasure to meet you," my usually warm, friendly wife said stiltedly. "Tanya."

"Such a pleasure," Tanya agreed, her eyes sliding amusedly to mine and then back to Bella. "I can't tell you how happy we are that Edward finally found you, his mate. Such happy news! We'll have lots of time later to share embarrassing stories, yes?"

"Yes," Bella agreed with a tilt of her head, warming slightly.

"Edward!" Irina shrieked, throwing herself at me. There was another awkward moment as I reached out to catch her as she crashed into me, only to be thwarted once again by Bella holding on to my hand with all of her newborn strength. Irina clutched her arms around my neck and slid down my body. There was a low growl next to me, and I backed up hastily, doing my best to settle Irina on her feet with only one hand.

Kate walked up behind her sister, laughing. She leaned up and gave me a dry, quick peck on my cheek, grabbing Irina's shoulders and pulling her back. She turned to Bella. "I'm Kate, this is Irina. I'll apologize for my sisters. It's been such a long time since we've seen Edward. We'd despaired of ever having him back again. And…" _His eyes_, she thought. _His eyes_. "Well, we're just all so happy to see him, and to meet you."

Bella's grip on my hand actually relaxed slightly. She gave an almost genuine smile. "Thank you. It's nice to meet you, too."

Kate rolled her eyes good naturedly. "You're too kind. We're a bit overwhelming. But we're just so very curious, not only to meet Edward's mate – his wife! – but someone who knows Phillip, as well. We've missed him so. I hope you don't mind being interrogated. It's been forever since we've seen him, and I'd love to hear what he was up to in the years he was with you." She gave me a wink as she managed to disengage my hand from Bella's and steer her off toward the sofa, her sisters laughing and fluttering around them.

Bella gave me an arch look over her shoulder, and I shrugged, moving in the other direction to greet Eleazar and Carmen.

After the pleasantries had been observed, and Bella was made comfortable by the interest everyone showed in her stories of Phillip, we got down to the true purpose of the visit. Eleazar leaned forward from where he sat on one of the large sofas, studying Bella intently.

"Definitely a shield," he murmured, maintaining direct contact with her eyes. "You already knew that." Everyone stilled in the room. "But…I've never sensed such an ability, so vast…no wonder Aro is fascinated."

"What do you mean, vast?" I asked, slipping my arm around her waist from where I sat next to her.

Eleazar frowned. "It's…big, I don't know how else to explain. Powerful. Unique to my experience. But there's something else. Something else I can't quite put my finger on…" his voice trailed off as he searched Bella's anxious face, and then he shook his head with a wry grin. "I just don't know. It will be very interesting to test her."

"Do you think she can project?" Jasper asked curiously.

Eleazar pursed his lips, and sat back in his seat. "I think…yes. I have no idea how it will work," he added quickly at the gasp from Bella and the excited murmurs from around the room, "but yes. I see her shield as expandable."

She turned excitedly to me. "How do I know? What do I do?"

I shrugged helplessly. "I have no idea."

Kate stood and walked over to us. "Do you mind if we see if you can block me?"

Bella stood eagerly, and Esme mirrored the movement from across the room, her arm out. "Can we go outside?" she suggested warily. "Just in case…well, just in case?"

Carlisle grinned, and put his arms around her shoulders. "A good idea."

We all moved outside, onto the front lawn, where the space was wide and open. I couldn't help the tension that crawled up my spine as we all formed a loose circle around Kate and Bella. I knew she was impervious, indestructible, but she could still feel pain, and I rebelled against the idea. I knew her shield was a powerful thing, she blocked my immensely potent powers even while still human, but…it was very difficult for me to stand by and watch. I shoved my hands into my pockets and was grateful when I felt Alice's hand rubbing my back.

"She'll be fine, Edward," she murmured. I saw the visions in her head of Bella standing unaffected while Kate gripped her arm. I let out a sigh of relief.

Kate reached out toward Bella. She paused a few inches away, raising a brow. "Are you ready? This will be a light one."

Bella nodded, bracing her shoulders. Kate placed her hand on Bella's forearm and stood quietly.

"All right?" Kate queried softly.

"Yes," Bella replied with a smile.

"Here's a bit more. I'll increase the power slowly, so just let me know if you feel anything."

Bella nodded, and Kate bowed her head, concentrating. After a few minutes, I could see her body trembling slightly, and I could hear her thoughts as she concentrated on channeling the full force of her power. Finally, she took a step back with a gasp. "That's all I have," she said, slightly breathless, with an appreciative glance at Bella. "You didn't feel anything?"

"No." Bella frowned. "But I don't know what I'm doing. It's not like I'm trying to block or shield anything – I'm not really doing anything at all. If I don't know what I'm doing, how can I know to make it project? How can I control it?"

Emmet walked forward, and I concealed a laugh behind a cough as I read his thoughts. "Try it on me, Katie. I want to see if it's just a little static electricity."

She grinned, and Rosalie rolled her eyes, crossing her arms over her chest. "Are you sure, Emmett?" Kate asked. "I've knocked bigger vampires than you on their ass. I once even threw a giant back quite a distance."

"C'mon." Emmett grinned back at her and held out his hand.

Kate shrugged and stepped forward, reaching out and touching his palm with two fingers. Emmett bellowed and shot backward about twenty feet, landing square on his ass. Esme rushed to him, while Rosalie followed at a slower pace, smiling at her husband. Emmet sat there, stunned, shaking his head slowly back and forth, before he was able to shoot Kate an admiring glance.

"Damn, Katie, that's something else."

Kate tapped her finger on her chin thoughtfully, staring at Bella, before turning to me. "I have an idea," she said. "Maybe Bella can throw her shield to protect someone she feels strongly about. Edward, if she feels you are being threatened, maybe she can pull you under her shield without really thinking about it."

"No," Bella protested automatically. "Leave Edward out of this. I'll figure it out."

Kate moved purposefully toward me. I raised a brow dubiously at her, and she grinned. "It won't hurt too much, I promise," she said, raising her arm toward me.

Jasper darted forward to grab Bella's arms, and Emmett staggered to his feet to help as she struggled toward me.

"Kate," she growled warningly. "Don't. I mean it. Don't!"

I kept my eyes on Kate as she came closer, reading her intent and determination. I could also hear Emmett's and Jasper's surprise at how strong Bella was as they tried to hold on to her, but I put it out of my thoughts. Kate smiled at me as she slowed, raising her arm, and I held my palm out toward her.

"Edward, no!" Bella shouted, and I took Kate's hand.

Her palm was small as it fitted into mine, but not as small as Bella's. I sensed Kate's surprise as she brought more pressure to bear on her talent, increasing her power, but I felt nothing. I raised my gaze from hers to Bella's in wonder, only to see my wife hanging in my brother's grips as she concentrated on me intently.

"Nothing," I whispered in amazement. I could tell Kate was using considerable power. "Bella?"

I saw her concentration waver as a very odd look crossed her face, and my palm started tingling. It shifted into a sharp buzz, and then zapped me as I jerked my arm back in shock. "Ow!"

I shook my hand to rid it of the sharp pain, and turned to see Bella sag into Jasper. I was at her side in a second, taking her weight as she dropped to her knees. I was frantic.

"What's the matter?" I demanded, running my hands over her hair, her face, her arms. "Bella, what is it?" If she was hurt…I didn't know what I would do.

"Edward," she gasped breathlessly. "Edward, I could hear. I could hear you this time."

"What?" I asked, shocked. _What the hell?_

She brought her hand up to cup my cheek. "I could hear…your thoughts. I saw her moving toward you and got so angry, and all of a sudden it was like throwing a net around you. I could _see_ it. And then…I could hear."

I stared at her, at a loss for words, not understanding. What kind of freaky ass shit was this?

"What the hell does that mean?" Emmett voiced what was on everybody's mind.

Alice danced forward, gripping our hands excitedly. "I think I know," she said. She turned to Kate. "Come here." She gestured her over to us, and pulled Bella and me to our feet. "Okay, Kate, concentrate on a very low level shock. Bella, throw your shield around Kate. Let me know when you think you have it."

Bella looked at me, and I shrugged. "Alice, what -"

"Go on, Bella," Alice said impatiently. "Trust me."

She stared at my sister for a second, then at me, and then turned to Kate. She frowned, her features strained, and then gave a short nod. "Okay, I think I have it."

"Now, take my hand," Alice said to Bella, and her frown deepened. "Keep your shield around Kate, but touch me.

Bella's hand came out, and I tried to reach into Alice's mind. I stepped back in shock at what I saw. Alice gripped Bella's fingers in hers, and then yanked back with a delighted laugh, shaking her arm.

"What?" I said incredulously. "She's…what? How?"

"Now Jazz!" Alice clapped her hands, pulling her husband forward. Jasper stood stoic facing Bella. "Put your shield around Jazz."

Bella's face took on that look of concentration, and then it slowly faded into wonder. She blinked her eyes rapidly, her gaze darting from Jasper, to me, back to Alice. Her mouth opened, and stayed like that for a few seconds. "I…I could…Oh, God, I could feel…"

"Emotions!" Alice clapped her hands again in delight, turning to me. "Don't you see?"

"Holy shit," I whispered, my eyes going to Bella in astonishment. She darted to me.

"What? What, Edward? Alice?"

"You…you're…You're picking up other people's abilities. When they're under your shield, you're able to take on their particular gifts," I said. She stared at me.

"Wh-what?"

I threw my head back and laughed, hugging her to me. "That's amazing!"

"I'm what?" she asked again, her voice muffled against my chest.

"When you throw your shield over someone, you're able to take on their talent, their ability. Use it like it was your own." I shook my head. "I've never heard anything like it. Have you?" I asked Eleazar.

He looked stunned, just like the rest of us. "No. No, I haven't."

"That's just fucking cool," Emmett said in awe.

Bella lifted her head to look at me. "That's what I was hearing that first night, after I was changed, after we got back from…hunting. When Alice startled me in the doorway and I tried to protect you, and when Emmett had you under his arm. I heard their thoughts, the thoughts of everyone in the room. I thought I was going crazy, having newborn overload or something."

"You were trying to protect me," I said in sudden realization. "You must have unconsciously thrown your shield at me, and taken on some of my mind reading ability."

She smiled up at me, her eyes going soft and heated. "You can listen to my mind," she said softly, and a wave of heat washed over me at the thought of how I could hear her. "It's only fair I can hear yours."

"I like my way better," I grinned, kissing her. I wanted my mouth on her, any part of her, always.

She was thrilled beyond belief that she could help protect our family against any dangers, especially those she felt we had brought to them in the form of the Volturi. It was an interesting and educational time for us as her confidence and happiness soared.

We learned.


	23. Chapter 22: Dear Friend

**Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight characters, still. Just the words in this story are mine.**

**Beta love to Sarahsumbrella and silentnc.**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO: Dear Friend**

We spent the next few weeks learning – each other, Bella's talent, teaching her about her more typical vampire abilities as well. She loved to race with me through the forest, and as running was one of my favorite things to do, I couldn't imagine being happier, here, at home with her.

She'd gotten much more efficient in her feeding. We were out hunting, and I stood leaning against a tree, watching her as she stalked a large elk. Her concentration was complete, her expression intense as her body coiled for the killing blow. My heart swelled and my loins tightened, and I knew I would never, ever tire of this woman. She was my entire world.

Which is why, when I heard intruding thoughts coming swiftly from the south, I instinctively spun in a defensive crouch, snarls ripping up from my chest. Bella was instantly at my side and reached out for my hand. Even though I knew she was as indestructible as I was, perhaps even more so, I slid her behind me as I heard the thoughts of something not quite human coming closer.

"What is it, Edward?" she whispered, going still. She tipped her head, trying to hear.

As whatever it was came closer, I began to feel a familiar tenor to the mind I heard. I cautiously stood as he slowed in his rapid advance toward us, finally coming to a halt some distance away, out of Bella's hearing range.

"Jacob," I murmured in surprise, and Bella's head whirled toward me.

"_Jacob_, Jacob?" she asked, incredulous. "What's he doing here?"

_If you can hear me_, came Jacob's thoughts, _meet me at my dad's house later. I'll be there all afternoon_. I could sense the faint thread of amusement in his head_. There are some things I think we need to talk about, but I don't want to upset your newborn vampire._

"He wants to talk to me." I squeezed her hand. "Alone."

Her brows rose suspiciously. "No. I'm going with you."

I turned to her, taking both of her hands in mine. "He wants to meet me at his father's house, on the reservation. There will be too many humans around for you to go with me."

She bit her lip – a habit I was glad to see did not fade with her human tendencies – and frowned. "Why does he want to meet you there? Why not somewhere else, where I can go with you?"

I kissed her forehead. "Probably because he feels safe there, and he knows all about a newborn vampire's volatile emotions. You're not ready for this yet, Bella. I'll be fine. Jacob is a friend."

She frowned, but nodded. "Are you're sure you'll be all right?"

"I'm sure. Are you done feeding?"

"For now." She turned with me, back toward the house. We began jogging easily, in no particular hurry. "How do you know you'll be safe, Edward? What if it's some sort of trap the Volturi set up? Jacob can kill you." She barely repressed a shudder.

I stopped, turning to her once again. I could sense her agitation. "Bella, I heard nothing of treachery in his mind. He really does just want to talk to me, probably about the Volturi, but I didn't sense their involvement in this at all. Besides, there is not only the treaty, but their relationship with Carlisle."

"What treaty?" she asked. "And I didn't know Carlisle was involved in all of this."

It was my turn to frown. "I guess I didn't explain to you about the Quileute tribe down in LaPush, did I?"

"No."

I turned her small, white hand over in mine, tracing the faintly glimmering skin, before pressing it to my mouth. "Where to begin?" I murmured to myself, and she cupped her palm over my cheek.

"Jacob is a member of the Quileute Indian tribe, from just north of us in LaPush."

"I know of the Quileutes," Bella said."Seth was from LaPush."

I remembered this name as the boy she had known when she was younger, the one who had taught her about cars. A thoughtful frown wrinkled my brow, but I pushed this interesting tidbit of information to the back of my mind for now.

"Many members of the Quileute tribe have a gene, a special gene, one that enables them to shapeshift."

"Shapeshift?" she questioned.

"Jacob isn't an actual werewolf, thank goodness," I said with a shudder. "Despicable creatures. He's a true shapeshifter – one that takes the form of a wolf, as you saw." She nodded with a quirk of her mouth. "For some reason, all of the Quileute who possess this gene turn into a wolf. And a wolf is the only creature that can kill a vampire. It's thought that the Quileute have this gene to protect their tribal members from vampires. No one knows how or why, it's just always been that way." I gave a shrug. No one, not the Volturi nor the Quileute themselves, could explain it.

"Many years ago – hundreds – the Volturi discovered the fact that this particular tribe had the ability to shapeshift into vampire killers and sent a team to investigate. Carlisle was staying with the Volturi at the time, and he was part of the group that went to look into this perceived threat. It was a good thing he was there, from the stories I've heard." I shook my head in memory. "It could have turned into a bloodbath but for Carlisle's ability to reason with both sides. He was instrumental in developing the treaty between the shapeshifting Quileute and the Volturi."

"What was the treaty?" Bella asked curiously.

"They finally came to an agreement that the Volturi would leave the tribe and pretty much the entire Pacific Northwest alone, if the Quileute would volunteer one of their shapeshifters into service with the Volturi. It was an act of self-preservation on both parts, as it easily could have ended up in an all out war, one that probably would have decimated both sides. Carlisle – and the Quileutes – agreed that he should stay in the area to monitor and act as a liaison between the tribe and the Volturi. He has to leave the state and the area occasionally, of course, to keep up pretenses, but…We always end up back here eventually."

"So you get along with the Quileute?" Bella asked as we started walking back toward the house once again.

"Yes. It helps that my family doesn't partake of a vampire's traditional diet. It makes it easier to be in proximity. They know we don't kill humans." I grimaced slightly. "Well, anymore, on my part."

She stoked my arm comfortingly. "But they know you don't do that any longer, right? They won't…attack you?" She swallowed, and I could feel her hand trembling slightly against me. She really was worried about my safety.

I leaned down and kissed her. "They know. I'm sure Jacob has told them the whole story. I'm rather anxious to hear it myself."

"But if he's back…" her voice trailed off, but I knew she was thinking along the same lines that I was. "Then there's not a Quileute in service with the Volturi. What does that mean for the treaty?"

"I don't know," I admitted, as we came into the clearing surrounding the house. "I'm hoping to find out when I talk to Jacob."

"We've caused all kinds of problems, haven't we?" she whispered, and hugged me fiercely, burying her face in my chest. I wrapped my arms around her, holding her tight. "We've brought danger to everyone around us."

"Shh," I soothed her, pressing my lips to the top of her head. "We don't know yet if there is trouble. And if there is, we can certainly handle it together." I rocked her slowly for a few minutes, and then reluctantly pulled back. "I'll go talk to Jacob and find out what's going on there. I'll be back as soon as I can."

We both turned at the sound of the front door opening and Carlisle stepping out onto the porch. "Edward?" he asked.

"Jacob's back," I told him, giving Bella a gentle shove toward my father and swatting her playfully on her behind. She arched a brow over her shoulder at me, but walked toward the house.

_The treaty_? Carlisle asked in surprise, worry overtaking his thoughts.

"I'm going to go talk to him," I said. I gave a meaningful look toward Bella and then back at him, trying to make clear my intention that he look after her while I was gone. He nodded almost imperceptibly. Bella's steps faltered only slightly, but I knew she was aware of my underhanded attempts.

"Be careful," they said at the same time, and I shook my head in amused exasperation.

"I'll be back soon, I promise." I waited until Bella entered the house before I turned to make my way through the woods to the Quileute reservation and the Black residence.

Jacob was waiting on the front porch as I emerged from the trees surrounding the small, modest house. He held an enormous bottle of water, and took a swallow before raising it to me in greeting.

Hey!" he said cheerfully as I approached the steps and climbed them cautiously.

"Hey, Jacob," I returned.

He motioned toward a wooden Adirondack-style chair next to him. "Have a seat. Can I get you anything?"

"No, thank you." My mouth twitched in amusement at his automatic manners. I sat.

"Oh." He grimaced, running his hand over the back of his neck. "Yeah. Right."

"So," I said, hoping he'd take the hint.

"So," he returned, raising his brows suggestively. "Bella, huh? Newborn?"

I scowled. "That's my wife you're having indecent thoughts about, pal."

His brows rose even higher. "Wife? Really? Wow." He grinned. "Congratulations."

"Thank you," I acknowledged. We sat in silence for a few moments, contemplating the forest spread out in front of us. His thoughts were deliberately vague. "So what are you doing home, Jacob?" I finally asked.

I flinched at the thoughts and scenes that flickered through his mind – Aro's furious countenance, Jacob standing stoic and impassive before the Volturi triumvirate of Aro, Marcus, and Caius, waiting for judgment, bearing the brunt of their displeasure at his actions in Paris. I saw in his mind the scene of when we had last been together, the vision of me disappearing with Bella on my back, him holding Felix down as long as he could before leaping off of our friend, disappearing himself before returning to Volterra at Aro's summons…

"Jacob!" I sat forward, my eyes intent on his placid face. "What…?"

"The Men in Black were a little…perturbed with me," he said as he slanted me a look out of one eye, smiling slightly. "I knew it would be pointless to try to run, so I went back when they…called, before they could send someone after me." I saw the thought of Jane in his head, and shuddered. I saw more memories of him on his knees before Aro, Marcus, and Caius, still stoic and aloof, with Felix's trembling hands around his neck. I recoiled in shock.

"He couldn't do it," Jacob said softly, breaking through the visions of horror. "Felix. He…couldn't. And they knew it. Or at least Aro did." He shook his head slowly, staring forward again, and anguish washed through me.

"Jacob, I'm so sorry. I never meant -"

"I know you didn't." He turned to face me head on, a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. "I did it because I wanted to. Because it was right. Bella didn't deserve to die, and you deserve her, Edward. You deserve each other, to be happy. It was the right thing to do."

I was overwhelmed. I reached out and placed my cold hands over his clasped ones, squeezing the over-warm flesh in gratitude.

"Thank you," I whispered. "I can't say it enough, Jacob. Thank you."

He shrugged uncomfortably, and I leaned back. After a while I asked, "So how did you…"

He shook his head and stood, moving a few feet away to lean against the wooden support post. He stared out toward the trees before finally turning to face me again. "It boiled down to the fact that the Volturi didn't want to risk starting a war with the shapeshifters – the Quileute." He shrugged his massive shoulders. "So they banished me." I recoiled, and he grinned. "No, it's no big deal. Really. I couldn't continue to work for them after that, anyway."

"So, what does this mean for the treaty?" I asked, and immediately saw the answer.

We stared at each other, and I could read the honesty, acceptance, and contentment in his thoughts. There was something else, though; something else causing him some discomfort…and I could guess what it was. I'd sensed her presence when I first approached the house, although I hadn't understood exactly what it meant at the time.

"Jacob?" a feminine voice came from the open doorway. "Jacob, are you…" her voice broke off when she saw me sitting on the porch and realized he wasn't alone.

"Go back to bed, Leah," he said softly, his amused gaze meeting mine. I saw her in his head, too polite to look at her directly. She stood draped in his bedspread, completely bare beneath, glancing between us warily.

"Jake?" she murmured.

"Go back to bed, Leah," he repeated, finally flicking a fond glance at her. "I'll be right there."

She gave me one more suspicious glare before turning and making her way back through the house.

"She's going to have to get over that natural aversion to vampires quick, if she's taking your place with the Volturi," I said mildly.

He scowled at me. "Can you stay out of our heads, please?"

"I'm trying," I told him truthfully. "That's a new take on training someone for your old job, though, isn't it?"

He scowled for a moment longer, before breaking out into soft guffaws and rubbing his hand over his face. "Yeah. Yeah, it is." He cast another quick glance toward the now empty door, and I shook my head. It was kind of comforting to know some things never changed.

He returned to the chair, and we sat in companionable silence for a few minutes before my concerns once again made themselves known. "Jacob," I said slowly, frowning down at my hands. "What happened with Felix in the courtyard? After we…left."

He let out a gusty sigh, leaning back in his chair. I was trying to give him the courtesy of staying out of his head like he had requested, but it was just so difficult with him. He practically shouted every thought that went through his mind.

"He was a little upset with me, you know?" A smile quirked at his mouth at that understatement. I saw a quick flash of Felix throwing Jacob's wolf-form off of him, and them facing off, both snarling and stalking each other in a circle. "I think he was more pissed that I got the drop on him," Jacob said, this time a full-out grin spreading across his features. "No one's ever been able to do that before, except for you."

"What happened after that?" I asked.

"He went back to Volterra, and I did, too, not long after." He shrugged in a deceptively off-hand manner. I knew that there was more to the story than that, but politely turned my attention away from his private thoughts. "And then I came back here. The Volturi made it pretty clear I should make myself scarce for a while."

"Jacob, I'm -" I began miserably.

"Shut it, Cullen," he said fondly, in a phrase and tone so reminiscent of Bella it made me smile despite my somber thoughts. "I didn't do anything I didn't want to do. And I'm kind of glad to be home." He shrugged. "My dad can use some help around the place."

I nodded in understanding, well aware he was telling me nothing but the truth. It eased some of my guilt on his behalf, but there was concern still there for my other friends. "And Demetri? Do you know what happened with him?"

He was silent, and I jerked my gaze to him in alarm. "No," he finally admitted, meeting my worried countenance. "I don't. I think he went back to Volterra as well, but I haven't seen him since before you left. I didn't hear anything from him or about him in the short time I was in Volterra before I came home."

Silence descended as we both dealt with our anxiety for our friend. I would have to ask Alice if she could see anything regarding Demetri.

"Anyway." He pushed away from the railing and stood, shaking off the melancholy mood. "I understand there are a few more vampires than usual at the Cullen residence?"

I tipped my head in acknowledgement. "Yes. Our friends from the Denali wilderness in Alaska are visiting. They share our philosophy on…feeding." Jacob nodded and gestured for me to continue. "They came to meet Bella, and to help us figure out the extent of her talents."

"Her talents?" he asked, and I realized that Jacob knew nothing about my wife's capabilities. I considered this briefly. He was no longer within Aro's reach, but I still needed to be careful what I revealed.

"She's a shield, Jacob," I said softly. "A very powerful shield. She can project." His brows rose, and he let out a low whistle. "Don't tell anyone, particularly Leah. I don't want Aro finding out anytime soon about that little tidbit."

He nodded. I studied him, trying not to intrude in his mind, but I had to know. "Did Aro – any of the Volturi – indicate whether they would come after us? Do you know?"

"They didn't say anything about it in front of me," he said, and I could tell this was true. "But I think…I doubt they'll just let this go."

I knew he was right. My transgressions, including those leading to Jacob's defection, would not be taken lightly. "Probably not," I agreed heavily, once again sorry for involving everyone in my drama.

"We've got your back," he said softly, moving to place a scorching hand on my shoulder. "All of us, the pack here in LaPush. We haven't forgotten what Carlisle did for us all those years ago. We haven't forgotten the allies we have in your family. I hope you know that, and don't forget the allies you have in us. If the Volturi come, Edward, so will we."

I nodded shortly, at a loss for words, determined that it wouldn't come to that. I wouldn't endanger my friends any more than I already had. He studied my face and sighed. "Anyway, I'd love to see Bella, if you think it's okay."

I glanced at him in amusement. "You want to check out the other vampires visiting, Jacob."

He grinned unrepentantly. "Can't fool you," he said lightly, jokingly. "Yeah, that, too. But I'd really like to see your wife again, as well."

"As long as you remember it – that she's my wife." I felt an irrational swell of possessiveness as I stood.

His grin widened, and he clapped me on the back. "How can I forget," he said wryly.

"And she's a newborn, but she's been dealing with everything so well. It might be good to have you come to the house, see how she can handle a not-quite-human."

He cocked his head doubtfully at me, and I laughed. "Don't worry, we can protect you if she decides to go for your throat."

He rolled his eyes and chuckled "And you remember, Edward, let me know if you or yours hear from the Volturi, okay? You can imagine it's a concern of ours if they come for a visit."

"I will, Jacob. And thank you, again."

He nodded, and turned to the door. I leapt off of the porch and made my way back home. I contemplated everything he had said – and didn't say – as I ran back along the familiar route. It was very comforting to know we could count on the help of the wolves if the Volturi threatened, but I sincerely hoped it wouldn't come to that. It was a battle no one could win, and I wasn't willing to risk my family or my friends. Was I? I unconsciously slowed as the grim thought entered my head. For Bella, I would risk everything – I loved her with my entire being. Would I be willing to risk others I loved for her safety? I felt very small as I realized I just didn't know.

I approached the house at a much slower pace than normal, my head filled with my grim thoughts. I didn't realize loud music waspouring from the open windows until I was quite close. I shook my head in exasperation and amusement as I recognized the tune. _She's Sexy and Seventeen _by the Stray Cats. This had Bella written all over it. It wasn't a "she" that my wife was playing the song for.

I opened the front door and leaned in the frame, hands in my pockets, and watched Emmett spin my giggling wife around in wide, intricate arcs, their own version of a 1950's sock-hop, shouting the lyrics at the top of their lungs. Rosalie watched, smiling despite herself, from the corner of the room. All of the furniture had been pushed back against the walls, leaving an open clear space in the center of the main room for my brother and my wife to play.

"There he is!" Bella shouted gleefully, wiggling out of Emmett's hold and running over to me, launching herself in the air. I caught her easily. "Mister Sexy and Seventeen himself!"

She planted a smacking kiss on my lips and cuddled closer. "You're home," she murmured warmly, throwing her arms around my neck and squeezing. "You're safe."

"And sexy, obviously," I teased, my hand tangling in her hair to hold her still for my mouth. A rumbling purr rose from my chest as her tongue stroked across mine.

"What did Jacob have to say?" she asked breathlessly, reluctantly parting her mouth from mine.

"Later," I whispered, palming her breast, pressing, pushing the resilient flesh up and taking a nip. Sensation shot from my heart down to my groin, and I hardened with impressive speed. "Talk later."

She moaned, her head falling back, her legs wrapping themselves around my waist. I headed for the stairs, barely noticing that Emmett and Rose had made themselves scarce. I made it to the hallway and was heading for our room when she broke away, glancing around, biting her lip, and yanked me into the hall bathroom.

"What are you doing? I questioned as she shut the door and deliberately twisted the lock. I wasn't sure why, no one ever used this bathroom. She turned back to me with a close-lipped smile.

My brain froze in surprise as she pushed me back against the cabinet. I took a step back, clutching the counter behind me, bracing as she lowered herself to her knees. She had a mischievous, mysterious grin on her face as she ran her hands lingeringly down my torso, rubbing slowly over my hipbones, her fingers loosening the buckle on my belt.

"Bella…?" I whispered, my head falling back as my eyes drifted shut in bliss. Her hands molded to my erection through the fabric of my pants. She brushed up and down, slowly, firmly, before her clever fingers worked the button and zipper loose, shoving them and my briefs down to my ankles. She glanced up at me, still smiling that damn Mona Lisa smile, and brushed the swollen tip of my hard shaft against her lower lip. I watched in breathless fascination as she ran it back and forth, from one corner of her mouth to the other, never taking her eyes from mine. She opened her lovely mouth and took me in to the base. I moaned, low and guttural, shaking with the warm, wet pleasure, feeling the back of her throat close around me. I moaned again.

The sight of her cheeks hollowing as she sucked and drew back almost did me in, right then, right there. My entire body trembled with the effort not to come, and I ground my teeth together, hard. My hands clasped around her head, my fingers threading through her soft, dark hair, and I held on. After a second I mastered my control, but her hum of approval almost made me lose it again.

"Shit...Holy…Fuck, Bella…" I was uttering profanities, reduced to vulgarities. God, I loved this. My thumbs traced along her cheekbones as I watched her take me in and out of her mouth, her tongue making an appearance to swipe farther down my length as her lips dragged along my shaft. It took an amazing amount of will not to guide her head, not to thrust uncontrollably down her throat as I watched the incredibly erotic sight. One sunset eye peeked up at me and narrowed, pleased with the look on my face, before drifting closed and returning to her ministrations.

My eyes drifted half closed in ecstasy, not willing to shut out the sight of her on her knees before me, my cock in her mouth, smooth cheeks fluttering against me, her lips tight and caressing. The enthusiastic wet sucking sounds, her soft moans, my gasps, they all mingled into an amazing song I could never hope to recreate. A hot, burning tension coiled in my loins before soaring up to swirl though my torso and arms, mingling with the incredible tightness in my chest, almost like the long-forgotten sensation of suffocation. It expanded and grew, filling me, and I lost any semblance of reality. My coherence, my entire being was caught up in the detonation that ripped through me. I cried out, my hips bucking, my hands clutching, and I pulsed endlessly down her throat, a twitching and jerking live wire.

Her hands came up to my hips to pin me to the cabinet when I would have slid down to the floor in a boneless puddle. My mind was gone, done, my brain reduced to throbbing, blissful pulsations.

"Urg," I think I said. Her tongue swirled and lapped, causing me to spasm once more, and I feebly lay my hand on top of her head. She bit my softening erection, using teeth, and I jerked again, in pain, in pleasure. "Jesus."

"So there," she said smugly, and this time I did slide down the front of the cabinet, my legs sprawling out in front of me as I sat bare-assed on the floor. She curled up against my side, wrapping her arms around my waist and snuggling her face against me with a happy hum.

"Pleased with yourself?" I rasped, my voice rough, dry, wrung out.

"Mmm-hmm." I felt her smile through my shirt where her mouth was pressed against my belly.

"Me, too," I admitted, and she laughed.

My hands stroked her hair and shoulders languidly as I recovered. She was stretching and rubbing against me like a cat, and I knew that the wild sexual tension between us was still running through her. I tipped her face up to kiss her lips, my hand running down her torso to flick open her jeans.

"Your turn," I muttered, not lifting my head. "I want to feel you come on my tongue."

She moaned, long and low, and attacked my mouth in a frenzy of need. I vaguely realized we were sitting on the tile floor of the bathroom, and I wanted more space. I lifted her easily, intending to take her to our room and toss her on our bed, picturing her thighs over my shoulders as I concentrated my attention between them.

I was halfway down the hall before I froze. Less than a second later, Alice suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs behind us. I spun around, Bella still in my arms, to see my sister's eyes wide and stricken as she unconsciously placed her hand over the spot where her heart no longer beat.

"Edward," she gasped in a strangled whisper. Bella twisted around me to peer at her in surprise.

Alice stared at me in misery before moving her eyes to Bella. Her hand reached out, hovering in the air. I stilled in shock as I read her thoughts.

"Alice?" Bella asked in alarm, struggling out of my hold to stand before me. Her eyes darted back and forth between us. "What? What is it?"

Alice held my gaze. "It's the Volturi," she whispered, and suddenly Jasper appeared at her side. "They've made a decision. Edward, they're coming for you."


	24. Chapter 23: Little Corner Sly

**Stephenie Meyer owns anything and everything Twilight, I just made this up because her characters are so captivating.**

**Sarahsumbrella and silentnc beta this little story for me, and they help more than I can say - thank you, ladies! Just to let y'all know, I have this really, really bad habit of adding/changing *little* things (ahem) after I've sent the chapter to them, so any errors you find are completely mine - they most likely never saw them so they could correct me...I'm a bad girl, I know...I'm sure I get the Naughty asterisk after my name in the beta queue. I'm sorry, but I just can't help myself!**

**The next chappie - Chapter 24: Evil Counsellor - is the last before the epilogue. :( **

**Thank you SO much for reading - and reviewing!**

* * *

**CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE: Little Corner Sly**

Visions flickered through Alice's mind almost too quickly for me to comprehend. I saw a vampire I didn't recognize moving through a forest that was too familiar, skulking through the trees, Jane at his side. Our house in Hoquiam loomed before him in the dim light. The images flickered, and I saw Bella in the throne room in Volterra, staring at me in wide-eyed horror as two vampires gripped my arms and pulled them from my body, grabbing my head and twisting it from my neck. In the vision she screamed in rage, her face terrible to behold. She threw her shield over Jane and began to systematically torture each being in the room with her mind, turning from one to the next and the next, before they finally overwhelmed her, tore her apart, and set her to flame. I watched as Aro instructed the Volturi Guard to hunt and exterminate our entire family for our transgressions.

The vision faded as I recoiled in panic. At the same instant, I was filled with an unshakable conviction I would never, ever let that happen, not to her, not to Bella. I had promised her she would be safe. The scene in Alice's head, in my head, changed once again. I was standing in Aro's place, clad in the elaborate black robe of the ruling class of the Volturi, my eyes, cold, red, and bored as Bella sat in the tall chair behind me. I saw myself moving forward to a kneeling vampire held down by Felix, saw my hands go around his neck, saw my fingers grip, twist, and yank his head from his body. I tossed it desultorily behind me as Bella clapped mockingly, slowly, and I bowed to her in bored disdain.

"No!" I shouted in horror, in denial, lunging toward my sister. "_No_!"

The visions changed. I saw Bella sitting next to me in a cozy living room in an unfamiliar house, deep in an unknown wilderness. Bella reached out and took my hand as we read on a sofa together, her beautiful golden eyes lifting to mine and smiling, full of warmth and love. In a lightning fast movement, I scooped her up in my arms and rushed up the curving stairs to a large bed in a room that was both familiar and completely unknown, laughter and joy spilling from our lips and bodies.

I snapped back into my own head when I felt Bella's fingers frantically stroking my cheeks. "Edward," she murmured urgently, her lips pressing against mine as she breathed my name. "Edward!"

"Alice," I groaned, and she whipped her head around to look for my sister. Jasper was holding her, frantically clutching her limp body to him. Alice shook her head dazedly, struggling upright. His hands hovered at her waist as she stood on her own. She let out a cry and stumbled toward me.

I caught her, and she clutched at me as we held each other. I reached out a hand for Bella when I heard her choked cry, and heard Jasper's confused and angry thoughts beating at my consciousness. "It's okay," I muttered hoarsely. "It's okay; it's going to be okay." I clung to that thought and the last of Alice's visions, the one where Bella and I were happy, whole, and together. I had to make the right decisions, for both Bella and myself. The other options were too terrible to even contemplate.

I felt Bella's shield envelope me, the now familiar sensation subtly tingling along my skin, and I tried to force the memories of Alice's visions out of my head. I heard Bella's shocked gasp, and knew I wasn't entirely successful. Mind-reading could be so inconvenient. "Edward," Bella whispered, confusion and fear in her voice. "What -"

"Shh." I deliberately thought of Alice's last vision, of Bella and I in what I could only assume was our own home, somewhere yet to be determined, in an uncertain future. I thought of how happy we looked, how much love and contentment was evident in every gesture. I concentrated on that.

She relaxed slightly, exhaling, and I felt Jasper's influence affect us all. I sent him a grateful glance as calmness swept through me, and I stepped back from Alice. She held my arm, searching my face. "What are we going to do?" she asked, Jane's eerie visage dancing in her head, and I squeezed her arm comfortingly.

"I'm not sure, Alice, but we'll figure it out. Let's go find Carlisle." We all turned to find him at the bottom of the stairs, watching us.

"I heard," he said, staring into my eyes searchingly. "What did Alice see?"

"The Volturi. They're sending Jane for me. Where are the others?" I led the way down the stairs. Carlisle placed his hand on my shoulder and then Bella's when we reached him.

"Just outside." Carlisle didn't take his eyes from mine. "What does that mean, they're sending Jane?"

I opened my mouth, but Alice spoke before I could. "They're a little upset with Edward for abandoning his last assignment." She cast Bella an apologetic look. "They want to know what happened, why he just disappeared with Bella. They want to know how he could turn the members of his team against their objective, against them." I cringed, knowing I had caused immeasurable problems for my friends. Now Alice stared at me. "They want you to come back, Edward; they don't want to lose control of your gift. And they'll want Bella's, too. They'll use her against you, use her as blackmail to get you to do what they want."

"How?" Bella demanded. "I would never do anything to hurt Edward."

"They'll count on that," she said gently. "They'll use your feelings for each other to get Edward to fall into line, their line. Or they'll…"

"They'll end me," I said flatly. I knew how they operated; I knew the extent of Jane's lethal power. They had a tendency to use fear in place of respect. I knew this only too well.

Alice nodded. "They also blame you for Jacob's defection," she explained. "They'll use your feeling for your other friends, as well. Felix and Demetri. They feel the need to make an example of you. They fear your power – your mind reading and your ability to influence other creatures. You're a threat to them, Edward, to their sovereignty."

I swore, softly but succinctly, and moved away from everyone to go stand at the window. I stared unseeingly out across the impossibly green expanse of well-tended lawn. I heard Bella's approach just before I felt her hand curl around my shoulder, felt her press her body against my back.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," she whispered. "It's all my fault." She shuddered. "If it wasn't for me…"

I turned, wrapping my arms around her and leaning my head down to bury it in the crook of her neck. I breathed her into my lungs. "If it wasn't for you, Bella, I'd be lost. It's not your fault. You had nothing to do with any of this – you're just an innocent caught in the machinations of beings that were beyond your comprehension. I should have just left you alone. I should have just told them I couldn't read you, and left it at that. I should never have involved you in any of this, just because I wanted you."

She stroked my hair, turning her face to kiss my ear. Then she bit me. "Ow!" I exclaimed, jerking back and clapping my hand over the stinging lobe. "What the hell? Did you just _bite_ me?"

Her red-gold eyes blazed. "If you had left me alone, they would have killed me, Edward. If you had left me alone, I would have never have known I could be…_happy_," she spat, in direct contrast to the meaning of the word. "We're in this together, remember? We'll figure this out together. Don't go all guilt-trippy on me."

"Well, then, don't tell me this is your fault!" I retorted angrily. Guilt-trippy, indeed. Our faces were inches apart, me bending down, and her standing on her tip-toes as we seethed at each other. The temper in her eyes suddenly changed as she inhaled my breath. They blazed with a different extreme, and her own breath panted through her full lips.

"Jesus, Edward," she whispered, tangling her hands in my hair as she brought my mouth to hers, climbing up my body.

"Christ a'mighty," Jasper moaned as lust thickened the air around us.

"All right, get it together, newborn," came Emmett's voice as his big hands pried my wife from me. Bella and I both growled, but he put her firmly behind him. "Cut it out, the both of you. Sex later." He shook his head. "I never thought I'd hear those words coming out of my mouth."

"Emmett," I started between gritted teeth.

"Can it, pretty boy," he said shortly. "Now, what's this I hear about the Volturi coming?"

He just watched me with a bored, raised brow as I glared angrily at him. Finally, I let out a breath, running my hand through my hair at my temple and sending Bella an apologetic glance. "Yeah, okay, sorry. The Volturi. Right."

"Sooo…?" Emmett looked at the group standing at the bottom of the stairs before returning his attention to me.

"So, Alice saw that they were sending Jane and another vampire I didn't recognize for me," I said, as Rose and Esme came into the house behind Emmett. I could see the Denali clan standing in the foyer, listening as well.

Emmett rubbed his hands together. "Just two? They're only sending two vampires to bring you back? Ha!"

"They only really need the one," I muttered, thinking of Jane and the excruciating, devastating pain she caused with a simple glance.

Emmett cocked a questioning brow, and Alice explained, "They know Edward won't risk our family. They know Carlisle won't, either."

"But they don't know the lengths I'll go to, to protect my son," Carlisle murmured.

"I don't want this," I said. "I don't want anybody risking anything. I thought it might come to this." I spared a quick look at Bella's strained face. "I'll go back, alone, and face whatever consequences my actions bring."

"No," Bella said calmly.

"No!" Carlisle said forcefully.

"No," Alice said thoughtfully, and I saw a vision of Bella and I standing hand in hand in the Volturi stronghold, facing the three leaders on their thrones, her shield strong and secure around us both.

"I don't want Bella anywhere near those three," I hissed, clenching my hands at my sides. "It's unacceptable."

"It's unacceptable for you to go by yourself," Bella said, walking around Emmett to stand in front of me. "I won't allow it."

"Bella," I began miserably.

"No, Edward," she said firmly. "It's not negotiable. You're not going by yourself, and you're certainly not leaving me behind."

I framed her beloved face in my hands. "I couldn't bear it if anything happened to you," I whispered.

"Do you think I don't feel the same?" she asked in the same soft tone, and I squeezed my eyes shut. "I can help you, Edward. I can protect you. Please, let me."

I could refuse her nothing when she pleaded with me – she was my greatest weakness. But the thought of her standing next to me as I faced a merciless enemy, one who would have absolutely no compunction using her against me…Christ. It was my worst nightmare. I knew there was no way she would stay behind, though. I would do exactly the same if our positions were reversed.

I tried one last time. "I'm going to have to fly to get there – on a plane, Bella. Full of humans. You just aren't ready for that yet."

Her face fell at the truth of my words. She knew there was no way she could be locked up that long, in a small, contained area, with a couple hundred or so humans. She had yet to even be exposed to a single one yet. A sad feeling of triumph coursed through me.

"Hey, what about FableAir?" Emmett said excitedly. I immediately shot him a furious scowl, and Rosalie stepped up behind him to give him a hard pinch. "Ow!" he exclaimed, frowning. "What did you do that for?"

"What's FableAir?" Bella asked, turning back to me after glancing curiously at Emmett.

"Oh. Well, um…" I glanced around the room, to find that my oh-so-helpful family and friends were studiously not looking at me. "It's…nothing?"

"Edward." Her eyes narrowed on me warningly.

I ran my hand through my hair. "It's a, well, a…private charter airline run by vampires."

"Private and run by vampires." She glared. "And you…forgot?"

"Yes?"

"No," she said, shaking her head. "Nice try. I'm going with you. When are we leaving?"

I shrugged in resignation, sneaking a glare at Emmett. She was going with me. "As soon as we can make the arrangements. I don't want to risk Jane – or anyone else – coming here to the house." I turned to Alice. "Can you see exactly when they're coming?"

"No, not exactly," she replied. "But it's nighttime, and the moon is new in the sky."

I calculated the phase of the moon. "No more than a couple of days, then. I'll make the arrangements right away."

The next day we were out in the yard, practicing with Bella and her abilities. There was a new sense of urgency now that we knew what lay ahead of us, and that our safety and chances of getting out of Volterra intact most likely depended on her talent and proficiency. She was getting so much more skilled at projecting her net of protection, but if her concentration wavered, so did her coverage of whomever she was trying to shield.

"They're going to do everything in their power to distract you, Bella," Kate pointed out patiently. "Once they figure out what you can do, and the strength of your skill, they'll have to try to get you to flinch. And then they'll be on Edward. There will be too many of them to fight off himself, mind reader or not."

She looked sick. "They won't get anywhere close to Edward," she vowed.

"Or you," I reminded her pointedly. I was pleased to note that even when she threw her protective shield over another and picked up their powers, she was still immune to them. I had worried that having someone within her shield would then make her vulnerable to their abilities, even as she made them her own, but much to my relief that wasn't the case. She had her own personal impenetrable defense that was separate from the one she could project, and no one barring myself could break through.

However, while she could defend herself and others against any mental attack and ability, she was as susceptible as anyone to superior physical strength. Emmett could overpower her, even with her newborn might. He and Jasper had been working with her on her fighting technique, but the thought of any of the Volturi Guards getting near enough to her to do physical harm…it was unbearable. I wouldn't allow it. I brushed up on my hand-to-hand fighting skills, as well.

It helped to know that personal combat really was not the Volturi's preferred method for handling a volatile situation. They preferred to use their tricks and beings with abilities such as Jane's to bring wayward creatures in line. They found physical confrontation unnecessary, what with the overwhelming abilities of their Guard. But what would they do, what recourse would they have, when the abilities they counted on were useless? It would be a surprise for them, an unexpected and unpleasant shock, and their unpredictable response caused me no little stress. It wasn't wise to surprise a vampire – they never reacted well.

Bella practiced projecting her shield, growing more confident and more determined. I watched, proud and somewhat in awe of the formidable force that was my wife. Her skill grew daily, and I thought she might just have enough mastery over her ability to actually get us out of the confrontation in one piece.

My attention from her enthralling form was distracted by cautious thoughts and wary movement toward the house from the forest. I realized Jacob was approaching long minutes before the others would become aware of his presence.

"Jacob is almost here," I warned the group. With all of us on edge waiting for Jane to show up, I thought it would be best to give them as much notice as I could to a foreign presence in our woods.

"We'll just…step away," Eleazar murmured. "So as not to overwhelm him too much." He and Carmen melted into the forest, heading in the opposite direction.

Alice shrugged, leaning up to give Jasper a brief kiss. "I'll see you later," she murmured. Rosalie wrinkled her nose in disdain, and they followed the path Carmen and Eleazar had taken, trailed by Esme and Irina.

"The shapeshifters give Alice headaches," I explained to Bella softly as she moved to my side, taking my hand. "They mess with her head, her visions, something awful."

"Why?" she wondered.

I shrugged. "No idea. Some species just seem to give her trouble. Zombies, ghosts. Some others. And you." I smiled down at her.

"You're comparing me with zombies?" she laughed, then stopped abruptly. "Wait a minute. _Zombies_?"

I grinned at her shock. "Yeah, zombies."

"Alice has trouble with the undead," Emmett chuckled.

"We're undead, and she has no problems with us," Tanya pointed out.

"Okay, the brainless undead," Emmett amended. "Wonder what that says about shapeshifters?"

"Wait, wait." Bella held out her hand. "Zombies? They're for real?"

"Of course." I kissed her briefly. "Most human fairy tales and supernatural fantasies have some basis in fact. Mythical creatures." I spread my hands out around me.

"Plus much of human mythology, too," Kate supplied with a smile.

"Ahem." I warned them with a look, and turned to where we could all hear Jacob approaching. He was moving through the trees and underbrush loudly, not wanting to surprise any of us, and moments later appeared at the edge of the trees.

He was shirtless, barefoot, clad only in a pair of worn, cutoff sweatpants. He had come through the forest in wolf-form, but had phased back before approaching the house as a gesture of goodwill and trust. He glanced around warily, counting in his head the vampires that were in the clearing before focusing on Bella and me with a grin.

"Hey, Edward. Hello, Bella. It's good to see you. You look…good."

I watched her carefully as she took a deep breath. She frowned slightly, her nostrils flaring, and cocked her head. I glanced at Jasper and he nodded – I could read in his mind that Bella's emotions and impulses were under her control.

"Okay?" I murmured in her ear.

"Yes," she said slowly. "I can hear his blood, his heartbeat, and it makes my mouth water, a little, but…" her nose wrinkled again. "It's like he should smell good, but he doesn't." She grimaced. "It's so strange."

"That's kind of how we all feel around them," I told her, kissing just above her ear. "You're doing great. Okay for him to come closer?"

She nodded. "Yes, I'm fine." She gripped my hand tighter, taking a small step forward. "Hi, Jacob."

He glanced at me, and at my nod he walked up and grabbed her into a full body hug against his broad, bare chest, winking at me over her shoulder. "Congratulations. I hear you got hitched to your bloodsucker."

I heard a hiss behind me at the term, but I smiled, subtly disentangling my wife from his hold.

"Thank you, Jacob," Bella said. "For everything."

He shrugged, grinning good-naturedly, and rocked back on his heels. "I'm just glad Edward didn't kill you – it was a pretty close thing there for a while."

I scowled, my tolerance waning with my friend. I didn't like to be reminded of those first few days of torment and indecision right after I had met Bella, and I certainly never wanted her to know how very close to the edge I had been the entire time I was with her.

There was another low hiss from behind me, and Jacob's eyes flickered toward the sound. His grin faded and his eyes grew wide before narrowing with intent and sexual interest– an expression I'd seen on his face many times before. I turned and saw Tanya right behind me, her face a mirror of his. I managed to not roll my eyes, but only barely. They were really a matched pair. Maybe Tanya the succubus could manage to tame his ways for a while.

"Jacob, this is our friend Tanya, from Alaska. Tanya, this is Jacob."

"Tanya," he murmured, taking her hand and bringing it to his lips. "It's a pleasure to meet you."

"Not yet," she returned with a purr and her scorching glance raked his bare chest. "But it will be." I had to consciously prevent myself from rolling my eyes yet again.

He grinned and arched a brow, not releasing her hand.

"You remember Carlisle, Jasper, and Emmett," I said pointedly. "And this is Kate."

"Yeah," he said absently, his eyes running down Tanya's tall, slim form. I sighed.

"The rest have gone hunting," I continued, knowing it was useless. I'd lost him the minute he'd set eyes on Tanya.

"Yeah," he repeated in that same absent tone. Tanya smiled her siren's smile.

"I can't decide if I'm creeped out or turned on," I muttered, shaking my head and trying to block the heated thoughts and images that were flickering through their minds.

"Turned on," Jasper murmured with a knowing grin.

I was startled out of the mental images of carnal lust by the frantic thoughts of Alice, fast approaching.

"Something's wrong," I said sharply, instinctively whirling to where she was running through the trees toward us. Jasper darted forward, alarmed, to intercept his wife.

She appeared suddenly in the clearing surrounding the house, shaking her head at Jasper and grimacing at Jacob. She came to a graceful and sudden stop just in front of me. I took a small, shocked step back.

"You made a _mistake_?" I uttered in astonishment.

She scowled. "Even I'm not infallible," she said between gritted teeth. "They tricked me. They made the decision to send Jane and the other vampire as a guard, but James was given free rein to act on his own. There was no conscious decision to send him on the Volturi's part. There was no way I could see him before this, but I see him now. He and another will be here in a few minutes."

"Who?" Carlisle asked.

"James," we both said together.

"Who's James?" Emmett asked.

"He's a member of the Volturi Guard. He's a hunter, a particularly vicious one," I explained.

"Still only two vampires," Emmett grinned. "Please." He rolled his head around to each of his shoulders, loosening his muscles.

I tipped my head, listening intently. After a few seconds I met Carlisle's gaze. "He's got someone else with him," I said softly. "A trapper." I could tell from Alice's thoughts that Rose, Esme, Carmen and Eleazar had circled around to try to come up behind the pair.

Carlisle's lips parted on a soundless gasp, and everyone stiffened in alarm. There was an almost inaudible _pop_, and I felt the familiar, faint electrical tingle of Bella's shield falling over me. From the stunned expressions of the rest of the vampires in the clearing, I knew they felt it, too. I looked at her in surprise.

"Are you…Everybody? How?"

"I don't know." Her expression was just as surprised. "I just thought about all of us being in danger – whatever the hell a trapper is, it can't be good if you and Carlisle look like that – and then…there it was."

"Excellent." Emmett grinned and gave her a fist bump.

She frowned, swaying in closer to me. "It's very hard, though. I'm getting bombarded – thoughts, emotions…oh God, Alice, visions…" There was another soft _pop_, and the shield was gone. Bella looked stricken. "I couldn't hold it."

I kissed her, hugging her tight to my side. "That's okay, love. It's amazing you could do it at all. We can work on it, controlling all of the other distractions. Who would have thought you could cover that wide of an area, that many beings?"

She rubbed her forehead, but smiled. Everyone stiffed then, the vampire James and his companion now coming within hearing range of the group. Jacob was trembling behind me.

"You should go," I said to him, not taking my eyes from where I knew they would emerge from the trees. "I've caused you enough problems with the Volturi."

"Got your back, bloodsucker," he murmured, and I cast a quick look at him over my shoulder. He just grinned, taking a step closer to me and in front of Tanya.

"Stay here, please," I asked Bella as Emmett, Carlisle, Jasper, Jacob and I moved forward in a loose wedge. Carlisle was at point, with Emmett close behind. We stopped and waited for the vampires to appear.

They did, only moments later, walking confidently up to the break in the trees before coming to a halt. I recognized James, his blond hair caught back up into a tail, but not the red-headed female vampire standing next to him. I quickly scanned their thoughts as Carlisle moved slightly forward. The red-head was James' mate, Victoria. She was nervous, a direct counterpoint to his smug confidence. James' eyes flickered to Carlisle, but it was me to whom he gave a mocking nod.

"James," I acknowledged, then tipped my head toward Carlisle. "My father, Carlisle Cullen."

He turned his arrogant attention to Carlisle's calm countenance. "Aro has spoken of you."

Carlisle nodded, never taking his eyes from James. Victoria's eyes darted back and forth between the two, pausing occasionally to rest on me. She wasn't sure who posed the biggest threat, but she was on her guard.

Carlisle smiled easily at James' words. "Aro, Marcus, Caius, and I go back quite a number of years."

James' amused patience was waning. He focused on me. "The Volturi request your presence in Volterra, Edward. They'd like to speak with you."

"And you're here to escort me," I said flatly, not willing to play his game. The tension on the lawn was almost visibly palpable. I felt the comforting buzz of Bella's shield surround our group.

"Of course. We brought the jet for you, to ensure your trip will be expedient and uneventful." Both his and Victoria's attention were firmly on me now.

"And if I decline?" I asked dryly.

James shrugged. "I'm afraid we must insist." A sly grin crossed his face. I stiffened at his thoughts. "And if you don't believe me, then perhaps Jane can convince you later?"

I fumed silently. I felt Bella come up closer behind us. James' attention moved to her, and I heard him swiftly trying to figure out who she was. He'd been told the Denali clan would be here with us, but he couldn't place her. I held my hand out to her and she stepped to my side, taking it firmly in hers. Honest surprise echoed through his mind as he made the connection and realized who stood beside me. _They thought she was dead?_

"My wife," I said clearly, my eyes boring into his. "Bella."

"Ah, the new Mrs. Cullen." His eyes drifted from her head to her feet, and I let out a low growl at his purposefully inappropriate thoughts. "The Volturi will be most interested to meet you. Your husband's version of events should prove to be absolutely fascinating."

James was used to being around Aro and his mind reading capabilities. He was used to having to be touched for Aro to read his mind. He knew, but wasn't thinking, that I could read minds without physical contact, and he wasn't taking care to guard his thoughts. I focused on his mental wavelength.

_Ah_. So Aro had an oracle. Not as powerful or definitive as Alice with her visions, but a prophet. The oracle had predicted a scene much like Alice's, with me standing in Aro's place, clad in his Volturi robes, dispensing judgment. I could see the anxiety this caused in the trio of vampire rulers, and how it had spurred them to send James to bring me back to Volterra. They wanted to question me, get a true feel for my motives, to bring my end before I could bring theirs. Bella, however, had been absent from their oracle's scene, much unlike Alice's vision.

I heaved a silent sigh of relief – this was about me and their worries over my possible future plans of taking power from them, of taking their place. It had nothing to do with Bella. The situation in Paris was just a convenient excuse to bring me to task. I could see the honest surprise in James's head that Bella was with me. The Volturi thought I had killed her, that I had succumbed to the call of her blood after escaping with her from the flat in Paris. It was inconceivable to them that I had not taken my singer, and since their oracle could not see her with me, they naturally assumed I had not been able to withstand the sublime allure of her blood. None could sense her due to her shield – not the oracle, the trackers, or the hunters. She was invisible to them.

I also saw that James did not expect me to come with him; Jane coming along later was his ace in the hole. He knew he stood no chance of bringing me in, just he and Victoria, not with my family and the group from Denali here. He'd come to confront me, get me to tip my hand, and keep track of me until Jane could bring us all to heel. He was ambitious, however. I could see that he thought if he could bring me in without Jane's help it would be quite a coup in the Volturi's eyes. He considered Bella, speculating on how best to use her to gain my compliance.

"You won't touch her." I meant my voice to be mild, but it came out in a snarl.

He continued to think about how he could wait until later – tonight, maybe – to separate Bella from the family so that he and Victoria could get their hands on her. I could see him thinking about tearing her limb from limb so that I would be beyond reason at losing my mate. He thought that in my anguish they could get me to come along or destroy me here. Either scenario would be acceptable to both him and the Volturi. I saw all of this in his head, and I lost my reason.

With another volley of furious snarls I launched myself at him. I dimly heard the explosion of fur next to me as Jacob phased in startled reaction to the unknown danger. Alice was yelling at Carlisle and Emmett, who just barely managed to grab me as I flew toward James in a blur of wrath and vengeance. Emmett and I grappled furiously as Carlisle and Jasper moved to stand in front of Victoria and James, restraining them from responding to my aggression. Jacob's growling wolf form stood between the two groups, watching James warily.

"He's planning an attack on Bella – planning on killing her," Alice explained breathlessly as she, Esme, and Kate struggled with Bella, who was fighting to get to me. At her words, Jasper and Emmett emitted low growls, and Emmett's arms loosened around me. I made another lunge for James.

"Hold on. Hold on!" Carlisle shouted, holding his arms out, standing between me and James. "Let's all take a second here. No one is attacking anyone. Got it?" He shot a meaningful look between the two of us.

_Speak for yourself_, I thought viciously, swiftly calculating how I could get loose from Emmett and around my father without hurting him. He hadn't seen graphic visions of James dismembering his wife.

"Edward was planning on returning to Volterra voluntarily," Carlisle said. "There's no need for violence."

"Then you'll come along now," James said, still straining toward me, his teeth slightly bared.

"There's no way I'm going back with you," I spat, rage still twitching through me. I straightened in Emmett's hold, though, and quit struggling against him. After a few seconds, I heard Bella come up behind me before she placed her hand on my shoulder. I reached for her hand, never taking my eyes from James.

"We've already made arrangements for Edward to fly back of his own accord," Carlisle explained. He made no mention of Bella, and for that I was glad. "He's leaving in the morning."

"You'll understand if I wait until I see it with my own eyes," James drawled, taking a small step back toward his mate.

"Tomorrow morning," I said roughly. "Eight A.M., Bremerton National Airport. FableAir's Citation X. You can kiss my ass as I board."

He sneered back at me, giving me a curt nod, and he and Victoria faded back into the trees. Jasper and I exchanged a look before he disappeared after them, making sure they were heading away from the house and the family for the evening. I remained tense, listening carefully to both their physical and mental trail until they were out of range. I let out my breath, glancing at my family and friends who were watching me anxiously. Bella was biting her lip.

"Let's go inside," I said. I wanted her inside the house, surrounded. Safe. "I'll explain."

"So there's no need for you to go," I finished, after telling everyone why James was here, and how neither he nor the Volturi expected to see Bella, well…not dead. "This has nothing to do with you. It's me they're concerned about, my intentions. Their oracle has seen me ruling in their place. It's me they see as a threat." She flinched at this, and I grimaced for the slip.

"I'm not staying behind," she said stubbornly. "I can't. You need me more than ever. If they don't know about me, they don't know the extent of my abilities. I can protect you, Edward; you've got to see that."

"They think you're dead," I told her. "I don't want them to know otherwise. I want you as far out of their consciousness as you can get."

"They'll know as soon as James gets his hands on a cell phone," she pointed out.

"Yes, but you'll be very far away."

"Edward." She pulled me over to the sofa, sitting down and bringing me with her. She held my hands, staring down at them before lifting her head to speak. "Edward." Her voice broke, and she shook her head before continuing. "It's your only chance. You know this. If you go by yourself, they'll end you, for no other reason than they can. It's easier for them to eliminate you, whether you are actually a threat to them or not. It's simpler for them. They won't give you a chance to explain. They won't listen to reason. I can give you that chance – I can, Edward."

I shut my eyes and bowed my head over our hands, struggling with my reason and my instinct. I didn't want to risk having her in their clutches. I didn't want heranywhere near Volterra and their fortress. But I knew she was right. I knew I'd be walking into certain destruction – I knew how they operated, better than most. They had no regard for other beings, only the certainty of their power and influence. There wasn't anything they wouldn't do to insure it – especially eliminating a vampire who was the first true threat to their supremacy they'd faced in a millennium. Bella's shielding ability was my only chance of getting out of there in one piece.

I brought her small hands to my mouth and kissed them reverently. "Bella, I -" The words would not come.

She disentangled one hand from my hard grip to run it over my bent head. "You wouldn't want to go on existing if I was destroyed, would you?" she murmured, and I shuddered. "I feel exactly the same way, Edward. Exactly the same. How can you ask me to stay behind, when this is your only chance? How can you do that to me?"

"I can't," I admitted softly, barely a breath. "You're right, I can't." I felt her lips press to the crown of my head, heard her let loose the air she had been holding in her lungs.

"I'm going with you," Carlisle said.

"No," I said softly, startled, lifting my head to look at him incredulously. "You can't."

"The hell I can't," he responded mildly.

I raised a brow at him in surprise as we rarely heard him swear. "No, Carlisle. If the worst should happen," I gave him a knowing, resigned look, "I don't want any of you involved. I don't want to give the Volturi any excuse to come after the family."

He scowled at the truth of my words.

"It's just not right, you two going by yourselves," Emmett joined in. He flexed his massive shoulders. "Sending you in there without backup."

"I know, Em." I went to him and clapped a hand on his back. "But there's nothing you could do. There's too many of them, and if you took on the Guard, they would show us no mercy, even if we did manage to get out of there. They'd follow us the ends of the earth, until we were all gone. It's not worth it."

"How can you say that?" Jasper broke in. "You're our brother; Bella is our sister. How can you think you're not worth it?"

I turned to my other brother. "Thanks, Jazz. I know what you're saying, but it isn't worth risking all of you – it isn't. Would you risk Alice, for me?"

His mouth opened and shut, and he growled in frustration. I nodded, knowing he got my point.

"Self-sacrificing _idiot_," Rosalie spat between clenched teeth. I could read her anguish. I stood and went to her, pressing a swift kiss to her forehead.

Esme stood behind her, her eyes wide and sorrowful. "I don't want to lose you again, Edward. I just got you back. I just got my daughter."

"I know." I pulled her into my embrace with Rose. "But I've got something they aren't counting on. That they can't imagine." I turned with a smile to Bella. "Between the two of us, we just might make it out of there… alive."


	25. Chapter 24: Evil Counsellor

**Twilight is all Stephenie Meyer. The rest posted here is mine, all mine.**

**Many thanks to silentnc and Sarahsumbrella for their amazing skills, knowledge, comments, and suggestions. They beta real good. ;)**

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**CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR: Evil Counsellor**

I was well aware of James and Victoria observing us, out of sight in the heavy forest surrounding the house, as Bella and I prepared to leave the next morning. They didn't realize I could pick up their thoughts easily at that distance – I was fairly certain they wouldn't care if they did know – but it didn't matter. Our actions wouldn't change due to their presence. They were staying out of my way, so it could do no harm to let them follow us. The others in the household were either in their rooms or out hunting. We'd said our good-byes last night, and I was thankful there would be no dramatic parting with them this morning, especially after seeing Bella's solemn, worried face.

Carlisle and Emmett drove us to Bremerton, the only airport in the area with a long enough airstrip for the Citation X to take off, other than Sea-Tac. We made the trip in silence, Emmett alternating between gazing out the window at the passing scenery and sending me baleful glances. He was still angry that I wouldn't let him accompany us – it went against his protective and proactive nature. He opened his mouth to protest once again, but I just shook my head.

"Stubborn," he hissed. Bella looked at me anxiously, and I gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. I sighed as I heard Carlisle agreeing with Emmett in my head.

Upon reaching the airport, Carlisle was able to pull his Mercedes up to the private jet where it sat on the runway. Both he and Emmett got out with us, and we all stood awkwardly until the pilot came to greet us. I could see that he was curious but professional, a vampire of indeterminate age, and well-qualified to fly the swift jet.

"I'm not going to be able to stand being so far away, not knowing what's going on," Carlisle burst out, unable to keep quiet any longer. He'd been struggling with this for a while, as had Emmett. "I have half a mind -"

"Don't, Carlisle. Please," I said softly. It was difficult enough to be taking the first step into an unknown future. I wasn't so concerned about myself, but the fact that I was taking Bella into this with me…I was panicking.

He gripped my shoulder, telling me silently of his love and concern before turning abruptly back to the car. Emmett trailed reluctantly after him and then stopped, turning back to face us with a grin and rocking back on his heels.

"I'll just make sure our visitors get a good send off," he said, gesturing with his head to where James and Victoria were lingering on the outskirts of the airfield, watching us, making sure Bella and I got on board the flight.

"Emmett," I began warningly.

He just smirked and began loping in their direction. "Whatever, bro. You've got to give me something to do." With that he was gone.

Carlisle sighed, gave me one last, long look, and then followed Emmett at a much less exuberant pace.

I watched them for a moment before turning to Bella. "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be." Her voice was calm, but she gripped my hand tightly as we boarded the private jet.

The interior was somewhat small, but luxuriously appointed with four large, cushioned leather seats, each equipped with its own data and video center. A small, pull-out sofa was located directly behind the seats along one side with a rich burled wood refreshment center opposite. A rather spacious lavatory took up the rear. We took our seats, and the co-pilot approached us deferentially to explain the safety features and amenities. He also informed us that the flight would take approximately ten hours in the powerful aircraft, not including the one stop we would make to refuel.

"Please knock on the cockpit door if you require anything," he finished. "Otherwise enjoy your flight." I had asked for privacy during the journey and was pleased to see that my request was being honored.

Neither Bella nor I spoke during take-off, sitting quietly, each lost in our own thoughts. Once we reached our cruising altitude and speed she turned to face me, holding out her hand across the narrow aisle. I brought it to my lips and shut my eyes as I drew her precious scent into my lungs. She turned her hand to cup my face.

"It's going to be all right, Edward," she whispered, and my gaze met hers. I let the uncertainty and anguish show unrestrained in my face. "It has to be."

"Bella," I started slowly, knowing she wasn't going to take this well. "I want you to promise me something."

"No," she said firmly.

"Bella -"

"No, Edward. The only thing I will promise you is that I won't leave your side. I promise you my shield will hold. I promise to love you with every fiber in this strange, new body of mine. We promised each other forever, and that's what we're going to get."

"If something should happen to me, I need to know you'll protect yourself. I need to know you'll get yourself out of there and back to our family."

"If something happens to you," she whispered, leaning toward me and dropping her voice to a low hiss, "it happens to me, too. So don't let anything happen, okay?"

I studied her fierce, mulish, lovely face. It was set and determined, and I knew there was no reasoning with my stubborn wife. I let out a frustrated breath and kissed her. I meant for it to be a quick touch, but her hand shot out to grab the hair at the back of my neck and pull me closer for a wet, thorough tangle of tongues, a slide of lips, a foray of teeth. I hummed appreciatively, frowning slightly when she pulled away. She just grinned, standing and coming across the aisle.

"Edward," she breathed, sitting on me, leaning down to stroke her tongue across my bottom lip.

"Bella," I murmured back, sucking it into my mouth and moaning with her taste.

The rest of the flight passed in quiet desperation. We stopped somewhere near the coast of Nova Scotia to refuel and were airborne again in short order. I gave serious consideration to grabbing Bella and running while we were on the ground – a poorly conceived plan to hide in the wilds of Canada flitting through my mind. Neither of us wanted to admit, and thus make real, our fear of what could happen in Volterra. It was apparent enough in the touches, the glances, the press of our bodies together, but neither of us gave it voice. She sat on my lap, her head tucked under my chin, and I held her close while we both stared out the small window. Eventually she stirred, and I met her gaze quizzically as she took both of my hands in hers. She stared at them thoughtfully, silent, her fingers stroking my pale flesh, tracing the cords of tendon that pressed through from underneath. After long moments she brought them to her waist, under her shirt, to press against her smooth, bare skin.

I raised a brow in query, and she smiled sadly, leaning up to place lingering kisses along my lips. I returned them uncertainly, unsure of her mood. The rise of passion that was so inevitable swept over us, tinged with desperation, and I wanted to give her pleasure, wanted to see it, if this was the last time. She gasped against my mouth as she felt my fingers at the button of her jeans.

"Bella," I whispered, and she reached for me, pushing the material of my pants down my hips, her hands encouraging me to lift so she could pull them down further. She stood quickly, shucking off her own, and then straddled my lap. The air left my lungs as she took me in, impaling herself in one swift movement, settling her knees and calves along my hips as she molded herself to my body.

"I want to feel you," she whispered as my hands stroked down her back. "For as long as I can."

"Forever." The word left my lips despite my efforts to prevent it. I felt her shiver.

We sat like that, perfectly still except for my hands sliding up and down her spine, joined, connected, and simply feeling one another. It was both bliss and torture. The soft, wet, silken clasp of her body was rapture to me, but now that we were joined I could hear the desolation and anxiety in her mind. Eventually I had to thrust, gently, seeking, and she returned the gesture with a roll of her hips. We moved languidly, not wanting the pleasure and connection with each other to end. We came, enveloped in a warm, soft glow, and I felt her trembling and shaking against me. I held her close, absorbing her soft, dry sobs as we clung to each other, not daring to move.

We stayed like that for hours, the entirety of the flight, with me inside her. We were still for the most part, sharing our thoughts, our love, until physical sensation would intrude. It overwhelmed us and we had to move, to rock into each other, seeking completion over and over again. They were the most significant and most terrifying hours of my existence. I let myself be consumed with her, concentrating only on absorbing the everything in my arms.

Reality could only be avoided for as long as it took the amazing piece of machinery to cut through time and space. We landed all too soon at the Volturi's small but adequate airstrip on the outskirts of Volterra. By the time the pilot and co-pilot opened the cockpit door and stepped into the cabin, we were both decently clad and sitting in our seats. The pilot opened the door and lowered the stairs. I rose, taking Bella's hand in mine and kissing the back reverently.

"I love you, Bella Cullen," I murmured, looking into her eyes and willing her to believe it.

She brought her other hand up to cup my cheek and gave me a brave smile. "I know. I love you, Edward Cullen."

We exited the plane, and I gave my thanks to the pilots for a safe flight. They had been instructed to wait and have the plane ready for twenty-four hours unless they heard otherwise. We walked hand in hand to the small terminal, only to be met halfway there by two large, hulking vampires. I could read that they had been sent to escort us back to what was referred to as the throne room, where the three leaders of the Volturi held court. They were the muscle sent on the errand to make sure we came along with no detours and no trouble.

"The goon squad," I said to Bella as we halted in front of them. I smirked at the quick rush of displeasure this caused both of them.

They fell into step on either side, directing us to an elegant black Rolls Royce Ghost. Bella raised a brow inquiringly at me as I helped her into her seat before being followed around the car to my own. I sat next to her as the two vampires got into the front seats.

"The Volturi are only subtle when they have to be," I explained with a shrug and a small grin. This earned a glare in the rearview mirror from the driver, but I just gave him a bland stare in return. Let them think I was taking the situation lightly; there was no way I would let them know by word or by deed that I was scared down to my bones.

I held Bella's hand in mine during the short drive into the ancient city. The vehicle drove through narrow streets, winding its way through the maze of buildings to the very center of town. We stopped in front of a rather unremarkable wooden door, and both vampires got out of the front.

"Do you have a plan?" Bella hissed quickly while they moved to open our rear doors.

I thought it a little late for her to be asking that now, but didn't say as much. "We need to convince them we are no threat to them – that we have absolutely no intention of usurping their power or rule."

"That's _it_?" she asked incredulously and a bit unflatteringly. I was unable to respond as the doors opened and we got out of the car.

As the heavy doors closed behind us I felt my frustration and anxiety ratchet up a few notches. My mind raced with possibilities that might get us both out of this predicament alive and in one piece. I opened my senses, taking in everything around us. We followed our escorts silently through echoing stone corridors and into an elevator. It descended for what felt like minutes before the door glided open and a diminutive form waited for us. I barely held back a hiss, instinctively holding out an arm in front of Bella.

"Jane," Goon Number One acknowledged with a grin. "You can see we've brought them home, safe and sound."

She nodded absently at him, her eyes locked on mine. "Edward," she greeted me. Her attention focused on Bella, and I saw the slight rise of her brow in inquiry. Good. They still knew nothing of the extent of my wife's ability. It was one thing we could count in our favor.

"My wife, Bella," I said evenly, walking out of the elevator to stand in front of the deceptively innocuous young girl. She was one of the most evil and deadliest creatures I had ever met. I didn't have to introduce Jane. Bella's shield was thrown over me like a familiar cloak, and I knew she was able to read the minds of those around us.

"Your wife," Jane repeated, tipping her head slightly. "Aro will be…delighted. Come along."

She turned on her heel without looking back, knowing we would follow without question, and we did. She led us down a long, wide corridor to another set of large, heavy, ornate doors. She paused to send me a wicked smirk before throwing them open with a flourish and walking forward into the wide, cavernous room. The ceiling was domed, ornately decorated, and soaring many, many feet over our heads. Natural light poured in from the clerestory windows ringing the dome, giving the occupants of the room a faint, gleaming sheen. Three large wooden thrones sat on a dais at the far end of the room, occupied by three ancient figures. The figure in the center stood and moved to the edge of the platform, hands clasped eagerly before him. Aro.

"Welcome back, Samuel, Ethan. Jane, thank you for escorting our friend Edward." He turned to the other two figures who sat indolently in their thrones. "Marcus, Caius, Edward has brought someone with him. Another vampire, I see." He knew full well by now who Bella was and why she was with me, but he was indulging his love of drama for the benefit of our audience. The room was occupied by a number of other creatures, those there for Volturi business and the Guard.

Samuel and Ethan herded us to the bottom stair of the platform, just in front of and below Aro. It wasn't an accidental positioning. The ancient ruler peered down at us in interest and curiosity. "Edward, it's such a pleasure to see you again. And your companion, as well." His red eyes focused on Bella.

"Hello, Aro. May I introduce my wife, Bella." I played along for the moment.

"Your wife!" He clapped his hands in dramatic glee. "May I dare hazard a guess that your wife was formerly Miss Isabella Marie Swan?"

"Yes."

His eyes searched mine. "Ah, such an interesting and curious development! I can't wait to hear your story. Don't you agree, Marcus, Caius?" There was a bored grunt from Marcus and an unintelligible mutter from Caius. "I can't wait to hear the events that took you from investigating this lovely young woman with your team to changing her, marrying her, and making her one of us. How you resisted her blood, that of your singer. I am sure it will be absolutely fascinating."

"It's an interesting sequence of events," I said, mimicking his tone. I knew that he had found out that Bella was my singer from reading Demetri's thoughts when he returned from Paris to Volterra. I could also sense that my friend was well and unharmed, somewhere in the room with us.

Aro's gaze narrowed almost imperceptibly on mine. "And of course, your future plans, my dear Edward. I would be most interested to hear of those." His eyes, however, flickered covetously to Bella, even as he tried to hide his thoughts.

A slight, feminine figure moved forward from the small group of supernatural beings that milled around the room. She climbed the steps of the dais, stopping next to Aro and placing her hand on his arm. He glanced fondly down at her, covering her hand with his. I saw him startle slightly as he read her thoughts, and wasn't surprised when he whirled back to me.

So this was Aro's damned oracle. I felt Bella stiffen beside me as she heard the woman's thoughts as I did, since I was under her shield. The oracle had prophesized that I was a threat to the trio's rule over the mythical world. She had seen the same vision as Alice, but without Bella at my side, and she was sending that vision to Aro now – it hadn't changed. She could not see Bella, however, due to my wife's shielding ability. The only reason Bella appeared in Alice's visions was due to me and my decisions. The difference between Alice's visions and the oracle's prophecies was that the oracle saw what _could_ happen, Alice what _would_ happen depending on individual choices and decisions. Neither, however, was entirely infallible. I hoped Aro was aware of both of those facts.

I knew this was the real reason I had been summoned. The trio were troubled about the risk I posed to their power and position. They had decided that the situation with Bella in Paris was a convenient justification to end me and remove that threat. Aro was using my behavior in Paris as an excuse to summon me to before the Volturi. His real interest lay with the prophecy his oracle had delivered, the one where I stood in his place, ruling with what he had always assumed was his unassailable power. Now that they saw Bella was with me – and even though they currently had only an inkling of her powers – their plot had expanded to remove her as well. I stiffened; there was no way I could allow that to happen.

"I pose no threat to you," I said through my teeth, staring at Aro. "We pose no threat. The only reason we came is that you sent a hunter and a trapper after us. Otherwise we'd both be happy to never set foot in Volterra ever again." I tipped my head, keeping my eyes on his. "I apologize for the events in Paris. I never expected…How could I? But Bella is one of us now, so there is no violation of the Rule."

"Yes," Aro said thoughtfully, his red eyes focusing on Bella once more. "Your singer. How…amazing." He was marveling at my control, the strength and extent of it, and this only increased his concern at the threat I presented, even as he wondered at Bella's power. I could see that he had known something of her ability as a shield before sending us after her, information gathered from a source I couldn't fathom. He stepped off of the dais, reaching out for my hand. "You don't mind?" He posed it as a question, but I knew I had no choice.

Bella's hold tightened on my arm as I reached for him. Aro clasped my hand in his, and after a few seconds his brow furrowed. His eyes shot up to mine in confusion, in alarm, and he jerked back.

"What is this?" he hissed. He stood completely still for a moment, and then reached out and clasped both Bella's and my loose fingers. We formed an unholy circle for another few seconds, until he threw our hands down and stepped back. I couldn't help but feel slightly smug. "Gemma!" he hissed at his oracle. Even though he had suspected Bella's talent as a shield, he still hadn't believed she could thwart him. I knew how he felt.

The oracle stepped forward, and he gripped her arm. The vision she sent him was, dark, foggy, and unclear. It coalesced, my figure becoming apparent, but an indistinct, swirling presence was beside me. Aro stared at her, and then slowly turned back to us with an incredulous expression. "She can project her shield?"

Marcus and Caius sat forward in their thrones. "How is that possible?" Caius asked darkly. Their concern at our presence had just increased tenfold.

Aro sorted through the oracle's prophesies. They hadn't changed, except now they were a bit more indistinct. His eyes finally left mine to focus on someone standing to the side of us. I read his intent a millisecond before he spoke. I was already in motion, pulling Bella behind me so we stood back to back.

Aro frowned at our clearly defensive posture. "Jane!" he barked.

The small blond girl stepped forward with a beatific smile on her face. She turned toward us, and out of the corner of my eye I could see her grin falter as nothing happened. "Jane," Aro repeated.

She frowned, anger overtaking her calm features. She took another step toward, focusing intently, but her vicious ability had no effect. She turned back to Aro and shook her head with a confused and slightly frightened look.

There was a collective gasp. I took a deep breath, feeling the action mirrored against my back. "Bella?" I asked softly.

"I've got this, Edward," she murmured back.

"Alec!" Aro commanded, his hands fisting at his sides.

Jane's twin brother stepped forward, glaring at us, but still nothing happened. Despite the precarious predicament we were in, my heart soared with pride at my wife's abilities. Alec's talent was the exact opposite of his sister's, he completely took away all of a being's senses, so that one was enveloped in a sea of nothingness until their fate was decided. His abilities had no more impact on Bella's shield than any other.

Aro was furious. Marcus was mildly alarmed, while Caius stood, his anger matching Aro's. "What is this?" He echoed Aro's words.

"She's a shield," Aro repeated, and under the anger I sensed his fascination and surprise. "Like none I've ever seen."

This did not please any of the trio. The others in the room had begun to close in, interested in the drama unfolding before them. "Samuel!" Aro spat.

I had already begun to turn us so that I faced the hulking vampire – Goon Number One. I tensed, giving Bella one last squeeze before freeing my hands to fight. Her shield would do us no good in a physical battle, but I knew she would continue to protect us both from any mental attacks. Her physical fighting skills were no match for mine, due to my many years of practice, even with her newborn strength.

Samuel moved forward with a grin that faded when I matched him feint for feint. He tried to whirl around me, but I was a fraction of a second ahead of him, spinning so that I still faced him with Bella at my back.

"Edward," she murmured, and I sensed someone coming at us from that side. Demetri – fuck.

_Edward, I'll take care of her_, he thought. _Trust me_.

I did. I moved forward to meet Samuel's charge, knowing Bella could hear both my thoughts and Demetri's with her shield firmly around me. _Go with him_, I threw at her in my head. _Be careful_. Demetri swept her up against him, his hand gentle around her throat. She relaxed in his hold, not wanting to be a distraction in any way, watching anxiously and keeping her shield firmly around me.

I ducked under Samuel's grabbing arms, flipping around and grasping one as I passed, twisting him roughly. He tried for a hold around my neck, but I somersaulted up and around in the air, landing behind him and bringing his arm back at a painful angle. He spun, slipping under my hold and pushing close, closing his arms around my chest. I brought both my arms up in a lightning fast movement, surprising him with my speed, and managing to break his grip. I lunged for him, my teeth at his throat, but he stumbled back and fell. I landed on his chest but couldn't manage to get a hold on him before he flipped, half pinning me underneath his bulk. I squirmed, rolling out from underneath him, and his killing blow was a fraction of a second too late.

I was on my feet in an instant, grinning evilly down at him. "Gonna have to do better than that," I taunted, and was rewarded with a bellow as he lunged to his feet.

We danced around each other in flashing, graceful movements, whirling and grabbing, flipping and leaping through the air as if we were flying. I darted over and around his slower but more powerful attacks. We crashed into the wall, cracking stone, and I once again slid out of his crushing grip. I couldn't help but glance at Bella briefly where she stood in Demetri's deceptively loose grip, and that was my fatal mistake.

"Enough!" Aro bellowed, noticing my momentary lapse in focus. His hand was lightly touching Marcus's arm – Marcus's ability was to sense the depth of relationships between beings. He had accurately read what Bella meant to me, what we meant to each other, and both he and Aro had correctly deduced she was my weakness. He swiftly came upon the best way to use her against me, just as Alice had warned.

"Ethan!" Aro jerked his head toward Bella.

Another very large member of the Guard moved toward her – Goon Number Two. He grabbed one of her arms, yanking hard, while Demetri held the other. Demetri sent me a quick, panicked look, loosening his grip; otherwise they would have torn her arms from her body. She growled in fury and twisted around, attempting to fling the larger vampire away. He held tight, jerking her completely from Demetri's hold, and she punched him in the face with a sickening cracking sound. Ethan only grinned, reaching up with one hand to straighten his broken nose, the other wrapping around the back of her neck. She struggled, almost managing to wriggle free, but his hold inexorably tightened.

I leapt toward them with enraged snarls, a red haze blinding me. I was on the vampire that dared touch my wife in an instant, ripping the offending hand from her throat. As soon as she was free, Bella reached up, grabbing his wrist and wrenching his arm from his body. I met her eyes for an instant in admiration, checking her for harm while she did the same to me.

My momentary lapse of attention was all it took. I felt Samuel hit me from behind, and I was knocked across the room. He was on me in a millisecond, before I could work through the pain and blinding anger. He grabbed me around the neck and hauled me up, dragging me over to the stage.

I grimaced, baring my teeth as Samuel forced me to my knees before Aro. I heard Bella's gasp as his hands fitted around my head, bringing it up and back, stretching my neck painfully just to the point of ripping it off of my shoulders. Her shield had been more than adequate protection against the mental attacks the other members of the Guard had brought against us, but her ability was powerless against brute, physical strength. My attention had wavered when a threat was brought against her, just as Aro had planned, allowing Samuel enough advantage to secure a killing hold. I glared defiantly into Aro's falsely concerned mien.

"It's such a waste," he sighed, shaking his head dramatically. "A shame, to waste such talent, to have to destroy one who was such a loyal member of our order."

I hissed as Samuel wrenched my head back impossibly farther, hearing Bella's cry of anguish. Sorrow enveloped me at the sound – I would do anything to prevent such a noise coming from her.

"Do what you want to me," I managed through my straining throat. "But let her go, Aro. She's done nothing wrong. Please." I wasn't being noble, I wasn't being self-sacrificing. I was in love, and there wasn't anything I wouldn't do, wouldn't give up, if they would spare her.

The irony of the situation did not escape me. Not long ago I would have welcomed oblivion; I would hardly have protested if my existence had been threatened. I would have submitted with the same bored ennui that had permeated my existence before Bella. But now, after having experienced the joy she brought into my life, I wanted to fight. I wanted to rail against the injustice of my existence being taken away just when I had begun to live again. I had rediscovered desire, hope, and enthusiasm, all because of her. And because of her, for her, I would give it up willingly.

"If only I could believe you meant us no harm," Aro murmured, staring down at me.

"We don't!" Bella shouted, dodging and darting around the one-armed Ethan, trying to get to me. "I swear to you, we don't! We just want to go home, to be together."

I was becoming so familiar with her shield that I could feel it pulse and expand around us, and suddenly realized what she was trying to do. She was attempting to encompass Jane inside her shield to take on her power, her ability to cause blinding, burning pain. I didn't have to read Bella's mind to know she planned to use it herself. I braced myself for the agony, knowing that the second Jane was under Bella's shield with me I would be exposed to her, and she would turn her power on me. If it meant that Bella could make her way out of the room, to safety, I was willing to suffer any amount of torture.

I stiffened as a horrifying thought suddenly occurred to me. If taking on Jane's power did work, and Bella managed to eliminate the Volturi Guard and the leaders, where would that leave us? Out from under their threat, perhaps, but wouldn't that make Alice's vision and the oracle's predictions come to pass? Would Bella and I be the ones to fill the Volturis' role, ruling in their place, losing the humanity I had battled so hard to keep and Bella's natural compassion and loving nature? I heard her low cry as she read my thoughts.

Even if she could use Jane's ability and manage to get us out of here, she would have to decimate almost everyone in the room, take them all down at once. I'd never seen Jane's power work on more than one being at a time, and I was concerned that Bella wouldn't be able to eliminate an entire room full of enemies. By the time she took one down and focused on another, the first would have time to recover and come after her. She would only have time to affect a few of the vampires and other creatures in the room before the rest would be on her, on us both. I knew, too, that even if she did manage to get us out of the immediate clutches of the Volturi, they would hunt both us and our family to the ends of the earth at the offense.

"Bella," I croaked. _No. Don't. Even if we do get out, they'll hunt us, our family, for eternity, until we are all destroyed._ Her frustration was evident as the faint electric buzz of her shield tightened around me, and only me, once more.

Aro's gaze flicked to her and then back to me. I could see his thoughts, his memory of the damned oracle's predictions. He was dealing with his own quandary. One on hand, he coveted my and Bella's abilities, he was intrigued and fascinated by the powerful talents we possessed. He wanted to have them under his control. On the other hand, he was frightened of them, and that was an emotion he found foreign and abhorrent. Our powers, especially together, could spell his downfall, his destruction, the usurping of his position and control as the ruler of the Volturi, and that was completely unacceptable to him. He thought we must be destroyed to prevent the possibility of his, Marcus', and Caius' iron rule ever being overthrown.

I kept my eyes locked on his. "We don't have that intention, Aro," I forced through my throat. "We never have. Power, ruling, that kind of responsibility and control has never been my desire or intention. You know this. It hasn't changed – I haven't changed. We are no threat to you."

There was a collective stillness in the room at my words. I knew it would be our only chance. Everyone in attendance, the other Guards, the followers – they all thought we had been brought before the Volturi for judgment due to Bella's violation of the Rule and my subsequent actions. No one had considered that the three were considering destroying us because we were a threat to them. It had never been considered before, ever, in the millennia of their existence. I could feel eyes examining us with new respect and wary speculation.

Marcus glanced around the room uneasily with this new shift in awareness. Caius looked mildly alarmed. "Just do it, Aro," he hissed. "This has gone on long enough. He has defied us, him and his mate. He has cost us dear. It cannot be allowed." I could hear in his mind he wanted to end us both, here and now. His hand was fisted tightly around the small torching instrument in his pocket, almost trembling with the desire to pull it out and set both Bella and I to flame.

Aro's eyes also shifted around the room, taking in the interest, shock, and surprise on the faces of the other beings in the room as they moved in closer to follow the events unfolding before them. "Careful, brother," Aro murmured, so low I only barely heard him, his attention returning to me. "You give much away."

"You know I speak the truth." I pressed my small advantage while I had it, speaking as clearly as I could manage. "You have only to touch me to know it's true, isn't that right? You'll know I'm telling the truth. We've broken no rules. Bella is changed and she's one of us, changed by my own venom. We offer you and the Volturi no threat. We've broken no rules."

Aro's gaze flickered around the room once more before settling on me with grudging respect. He nodded shortly at Samuel, and the large vampire's hold on my neck eased. I felt my crushed windpipe rapidly mending itself from the vicious hold, the sensation slightly scratchy. Aro slowly but steadily extended his hand toward me.

"Bella, let him in, please," I said softly, keeping my eyes steady on his. She made a muffled sound of protest, but I didn't dare look at her for fear if I saw her being manhandled my temper would get the best of me once again. "I need him to be able to read my true thoughts. It's okay. Let him in, please."

The almost imperceptible tingling sensation of her shield faltered and slowly faded. I could feel her intense concentration, though, almost like a physical touch, ready to snap the net of her protection back around me in an instant. Jane took an eager step forward, but Aro held out his other hand, halting her. He smiled serenely down at me.

I straightened my shoulders from my position on my knees before him, and boldly clasped his hand. I never took my focus from his bowed head as he sorted through the thoughts and images in my mind. He was still for many long minutes, so long that Caius sat forward impatiently in his chair. I held the air still in my lungs, hoping beyond hope he would see that my intentions included nothing but being with Bella for the rest of our existence, peaceful in the presence of our family, with no objective other than to continue as we had been, content in our own little corner of the world.

Finally, he lifted his head, his fingers drumming almost absently on the back of my hand. A faint frown crossed his parchment features, and he nodded his head slowly." I see," he murmured, almost to himself. "Yes, I see." His face rose in wonder to ponder Bella, and I knew the extent of her abilities was no longer a secret.

"See what, Aro?" Marcus intoned, utterly expressionless.

"I see amazing possibilities for the future. I see our friend Carlisle, and his influence on young Edward here." Aro's eyes remained focused speculatively over my head, on Bella, and I unconsciously tensed. He turned his faint smile on me at the almost imperceptible reaction. "I see what his mate means to him. I see his intentions."

He dropped my hands and spun to face his brothers. His arms spread wide in a dramatic gesture, designed to draw the attention of everyone in the room. "He means us no harm, Marcus, Caius. And now that he has made Bella one of us, no rules have been broken. Isn't that delightful news!" His hand came together in a gleeful clap. He turned now to face to large room like an actor on a stage. "Edward, Bella, I am so happy that you found each other, and made it possible to be together for eternity! I hope you will accept my belated but heartfelt congratulations on your marriage, and well-wishes for your future together with your family and our dear, dear friend, Carlisle."

I narrowed my eyes slightly at the subtle warning. Go back to Washington and stay with your family, with your father. The warning was not necessary; I had no intention of doing otherwise. I nodded in acknowledgement. Bella's shield snapped back over me, and its presence was a balm to my wary consciousness.

"Thank you, Aro," I murmured, standing and slowly backing toward Bella.

He tipped his head with a wide, beatific smile for the benefit of our audience, but his eyes were cold and steady on mine. Try as he might, he couldn't hide his thoughts from me. On the surface he was all benign ruler, but inside he was seething – angry to have to let us go, to have to actually worry about the threat we posed and what we were capable of with our unique talents. He regretted the loss of having us in his collection of gifted creatures, our abilities fascinated him endlessly. There was no mistake – he coveted Bella, craved her unheard of abilities. He wanted to use what she could do to bring him power and control, and the fearful respect of all mythical creatures. He knew that coupled with my mind reading and abnormal quickness, both mental and physical, Bella and I together represented the most powerful pair our world had ever seen, more powerful than the trio seated before us.

This was what infuriated him the most – the fear he felt at out potential power, the potential we had to replace him and his brothers in what they saw as their rightful place as head of the Volturi. It went against his instincts to let us go, but he was caught in a trap of his own making. The Volturi ruled because they kept the peace, upheld the laws. If he broke with that trust, he would himself bring about the very thing he feared. He would lose their place as rulers; the loss of trust would result in the supernatural world staging a revolt.

I couldn't prevent a slight smirk as I read his thoughts, reaching Bella and taking her hand. His eyes grew colder as he realized I knew of the trap he had caught himself in, and I knew there would be an accounting for the day's events sometime in the future. Aro had not held his position for millennia by allowing slights and questioning of the Voturi power to go unanswered. I determined I would worry about that later. Bella and I still had to get ourselves out of the stronghold.

Her hand tightened convulsively on mine. I slid an arm around her waist and whirled for the exit, moving swiftly to the oversize doors. I nodded at Demetri in thanks, feeling another slight surprise at the intention I read in his mind. He was going to follow us back to Washington. There was nothing for him here now. He realized that Aro would know of his loyalty to me and not with the Volturi the next time he touched him. I nodded imperceptibly, knowing I couldn't spare any concern for his situation until Bella and I were well clear.

The vampires at the door swept them open for us, and I could actually feel the heat of the angry thoughts Samuel was throwing at me. I took a quick glance back and saw him standing to one side of Aro, his eyes intent and deadly on mine. In that brief second of connection, I read his anger, his shame at almost being bested, and the promise of retribution. His thoughts were alarmingly echoed in many of the Volturi Guard – Jane, Alec, and even the oracle, Gemma. There was also the pointed warning directed at me from Aro, as he knew full well I could hear his thought. I resolutely turned my attention forward, eager now only to leave and get my wife somewhere we would both be safe.

I stilled a shudder at the malevolent regard following us from the room I that I had thought, when I entered, I would never leave. I held Bella to me tightly as we swept under the arching doorway, past the foreboding, heavy doors, and into the corridor beyond. It wasn't until we were standing outside in the alley, next to the hulking black car that had brought us here that I let even one muscle in my body relax. Bella exhaled loudly, and I realized she had been so tense that she had been panting softly, trying to take in as much as she could with her senses to evaluate every potential threat or benefit. She gripped my hand tighter, and we both stilled the urge to grab each other in relief, knowing we were still being observed.

"How do you feel about running to the airport?" I murmured as we stared at the car in distaste.

"Try and catch me," she returned, darting down the alley, and I followed.

I couldn't take my eyes from her, amazed that she was well and whole. I reveled in running after her, amazed that I was well and whole. I hadn't dared believe either of us would be after our audience with the Volturi. A smile finally broke across my face, and as we cleared the city walls I let out a whoop, echoed by my wife as she jumped into my arms. We continued as quickly as we dared for the airstrip and the waiting plane – the plane that would take us back to our family.

The plane that would take us home.


	26. Epi: This Tale of the Spider and the Fly

**Stephenie Meyer owns everything that has to do with Twilght, what's left here is mine.**

**Sarahsumbrella and silentnc - what can I say but a heartfelt Thank You. You made this so much fun, and I can't tell you how much I appreciate your help and support. I looked forward each and every time for your comments and suggestions and corrections. Thanks to Project Team Beta for hooking me up with these wonderful ladies - the PTB link is on my profile page. Great group - what a wonderful resource. Much love to Twilightzoner over on Twilighted for her quick validation, catching things we didn't, and just generally being awesome. **

**This is it, my friends. I've got a bit to say at the end, please bear with me, and I hope you enjoy!**

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**EPILOGUE: This Tale, of the Spider and the Fly**

We stayed in Hoquiam for a short time, mostly for Esme's sake. Neither Bella nor I could bring ourselves to leave her after the ordeal we had all been through, so we stayed until her worry and fear of losing us began to abate. It wasn't easy, I was slightly ashamed to admit. The urge to have my wife all to myself, to indulge ourselves in each other, was almost overwhelming. As soon as we could, as soon as it felt right, Bella and I began considering our options for being out on our own for a while. I looked at new properties, as well as the plethora of options we had of real estate already in the Cullen family portfolio.

It wasn't long before we settled on the ideal location. There was a plot of undeveloped land that had been in our family for many years, located in the breathtaking wilds of Northern Michigan – remote, extremely private forest with no access that humans or creatures of any nature would find convenient. It was the ideal location for a private home for just the two of us, a place we could be together and Bella could safely adjust to her new life. Human civilization wasn't so very far that we couldn't interact with them when necessary, when Bella was finally ready to test her control.

Esme designed our house, and she and Carlisle supervised the construction while Bella and I stayed in Hoquiam. We spent as much time as we could with the rest of our family, knowing we would be separated for a time. The thought was sad, but also somewhat exciting to be on our own, finally together, and able to indulge in the selfish desires of newly mated vampires.

The house was finally finished in the early winter, and the entire Cullen clan came with us to help move us in and give us a housewarming party, just the eight of us. While I loved my family dearly and had missed them very much over the past few misguided years, I couldn't wait for them to leave. I couldn't wait to have Bella all to myself, with no fear, worry, or concerns hanging over us. I wanted to run, just for the pleasure of it. I wanted to hunt, to feed, to make love with abandon. I wanted to talk, to listen, to revel in being with my wife, my mate. I wanted to put all of the volatile, recent past behind us and just _be_. We had over one thousand acres of forest crawling with privacy and wildlife of all forms, and we had all the time in the world.

We made excellent use of it, as the months rolled by. We made only tentative plans for the future. Bella grew stronger in her control and confidence, and she decided she did want to return to school in Paris. I realized I never had gotten a Literature degree, and figured I should take advantage of the opportunity. We decided to enjoy our time alone together. We would gradually expose Bella to humans until she felt secure enough to interact with them on a daily basis, and then we would travel back to Paris. Neither of us knew if this would take months or years, but there was no rush, no sense that we needed to hurry. We were happy in our home, our place in the world, the wilderness, and just being together.

One particular evening found us sitting in front of the fire in our cozy living room, both of us on the sofa. The fire was for atmospheric effect; we had both found it amusing that we enjoyed the heat it gave off as much as the flickering light and subtle crackling sounds. She was absorbed in one of her beloved books, her legs tucked underneath her as she read. I inhaled slowly, savoring the tangy wood smoke and stirring scent that was my wife. The deep blue of the loose, thin pants and top she wore accentuated her lovely skin and deep mahogany hair. I felt a stupid, sentimental smile on my face as I gazed at her and simply marveled that we were here, together, content.

A small smirk tilted her mouth as she turned a page, not taking her gaze from the book. Her hand reached out for mine, and I held it tenderly. I glanced down at the journal in my lap, a comforting yet strange feeling permeating my body. I started slightly in surprise as I realized we were living the scene from Alice's vision, the one she had before the Volturi had sent James after me – the vision that followed the one of me carelessly snapping the head off of an offending vampire, cold and malevolent in my robes that signified me as leader of the Volturi. This was Alice's vision of Bella and I, sitting in our home in the wilderness, together, wanting for nothing in this world but each other.

At my small movement, Bella lifted her head to gaze at me questioningly, concern showing in her beautiful golden eyes.

"I've seen this before," I murmured, bringing her hand to my lips. "I saw us here, in our home, happy and content, in one of Alice's visions. This is our alternate future – my alternate future, the one I feared I would never find." Understanding flooded her features, and she slid closer, lifting her other hand to stroke through the mess of my hair. "Without you, Bella, that other future was what I was headed for. I _was_ a monster, until you."

"Shut up, you stupid, silly man." Her eyes glowed with love and exasperation as they met mine. "You never were a monster, Edward, you never could be. You had just convinced yourself you were, through your own self-hatred at what you thought you'd become. But Carlisle was right – he's always been right. It's not what you are, but what you do with what you're given. You've always been the man I see right now. I love you, Edward. I love everything about you, even when you're being stupid or you drive me crazy and make me so angry I could tear your arm off and beat you with it. I couldn't love a monster."

She humbled me, this generous, giving woman. I didn't dare say it out loud, not right now, not after what she had just expressed, but I knew that I didn't deserve her. I was, however, determined to keep her for as long as the fates decided we had together. I brushed my thumb across her lower lip as we stared at each other, and I heard the increase in both of our breathing.

"I want you, Edward," she said, in an echo of the voice she used after she was first turned, in the forest after her first hunt.

I leaned back, opening my arms, my heart, and my soul to her in a mimic of my own gesture from that moment.

"I'm yours."

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**Thank you. I don't know what else to say except - thank you. Thanks for sticking with me, thanks for reading this little story. This has been an absolute thrill for me, not only sitting back down and writing again, but the response has been wonderful, especially since I don't "advertise" much. Thanks to everyone who talked about this story, rec'd it, and helped pimp me out - especially u2shay - thanks, girl! Go check out her story "That Girl".**

**I'll have some updates on the prequel and any other future plans for the story (outtakes, etc.) on the Twilighted thread as they come up - http:/www(dot)twilighted(dot)net/forum/viewtopic(dot)php?f=33&t=7172 replace the (dot) with an actual dot .**

**Any comments, questions, suggestions, etc. - always welcome, either review or PM me, as always.**

**Thanks, gang. See you soon.**


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